Blackwater pardons

I am one who worries. It's an unfotunate aspect of my character. RE: those blackwater pardons--were those guys in prison and freed by pardon? Im unclear on that. Anyway--I worry. What might they have promised to do for their Orange savior? What promises might have been made to them for their loyalty? Cant know. But for sure they are men of arms. Trained soldiers. No strangers to violence indeed. I am thinking of all the volunteers that showed up to gas and beat protestors at the church in DC for the "biblical" photo opp. Portland too. Apparently there is no shortag of men who will arm up and put on the jack boots for their chosen one. Scary. And I worry that we may be only days if not hours from a horrible crescendo. His back is against the wall. In a corner. His Niece says there is no bridge too far. Maybe I shouldnt have watched handmaids tale. How they pulled off that coup seemed whithin the realms of do-able. I am not sleeping well. Any body that has a mind to try to convince me that I am just letting my imagination run over myself and that I should relax--Jo and Kamala will be sworn in soon and we will all be ok---I will be greatfull to hear it. I would love be convinced. Cause I am way too old to live this worried without health consequences. Sometimes I think the last 4 years has probably taken ten off my life. Thanks for listening.