Why do we do this?

[digonswine]

Why do we fawn over and congratulate people that do-what I consider-the absolute minimum that a person SHOULD do? Here are couple of examples----

People get all thankful when the Bill Gates's of the world decide to use SOME of their countless billions to do some good. Is this not the VERY least they should do? I mean-the VERY LEAST? I think you would, and I KNOW I would, do much more.

I am thinking of this because of some recent events. . .I was bicycling here in Wisconsin with two other gents-I noticed that, when we had a car behind and one ahead, on a two-lane road, and the driver behind would wait and pass safely, my companions would give a thank-you wave to the safe driver. BUT--what they had done was the only safe way of passing us!

And the fuckers that just passed anyway-within 16 inches of us at 60 mph--we considered to be assholes and incompetent drivers.

Why should I thank a driver for showing minimal safety and why should we slob on the knobs of the affluent who choose to use a small portion of their wealth to do good?

I brought this up to my bike friend-the one that gave a thankful wave--he said "Just treat them like children." It is about rewarding them in the hopes that the good and safe behavior will increase. Can't argue with that.

[Mimosa]

1. Because we've become more like serfs than we ever dreamed?

Digonswine, I've thought much the same during the past decades. Compared to Carnegies, Rockefellers, Fords, etc. today's rich 'give back' next to nothing.

Excellent OP.:D

[Warpy]

2. I always reward good behavior when I see it

because the dog eat dog Republicanism out there has infected far too many people. The few of us left need all the positive reinforcement we can get.

Your companion is right. I suppose he's read B. F. Skinner, too.

[ScreamingMeemie]

3. "People get all thankful when the Bill Gates's of the world decide to use SOME of their countless"

Because so many of the Bill Gates' of the world would never part with a penny. Because I still believe that decency begets decency. Caring begets caring. :)

[leftstreet]

4. Why are you bicycling instead of driving? Are you a Commie?

:hi:

You should be burning gas!

[digonswine]

8. True-

the terrists won!

[JoePhilly]

5. Yes, people in cars, who slow down around bikers, should be scorned.

Are you on drugs?

If a person holds a door open for you, do you say "thank you" ... ?? Or do you assume that doing so is simply their duty?

I get the sense that YOU are the rude one in this scenario. A driver hangs back, your friends wave to acknowledge, and you get pissed?

Spare us.

[Luminous Animal]

7. +1

[digonswine]

9. I do not scorn safe drivers-

I expect safe drivers. That is the default for what we all should expect. I am not pissed at safe drivers-criminy. Am I thick for EXPECTING licensed drivers to act and drive in a safe manner?

Yeah-I'm rude.

The ones who do not follow safety protocol are the dicks.

Do YOU expect a high-five every time you stop at a red light?

Spare me.

[JoePhilly]

12. Did the drivers you refer to ASK for a HIGH FIVE???????????

NO.

YOU are the ass in this story.

BTW ... where I live, it is not uncommon for UNLICENSED BIKE RIDERS to form into groups of 20 or more, and block up single lane roads such that a speed limit of 45 becomes a speed limit of 25.

Maybe we should have the police give them tickets???

[digonswine]

16. You miss the point.

My example was not some anti-driver message. Hey--I drive too!

The idea was that, as a people, we-some of us-tend to congratulate those that do what they should do. And, yes, this is MY idea of should.

This was not a "bitching about proper drivers" story.

As for your biking problems--yeah--bikers can be dicks, too. The ones you speak of are clearly not doing the least of what we should expect. Not a problem in northern WI, though.(mostly)

[H2O Man]

24. Another very real possibility

is that they do see your point, and think that you are wrong -- at very best. Recognizing the mere possibility that there may be more ways to view this than your own might suggest that your thinking is so narrow that it is actually you who misses the point.

[digonswine]

27. Could be--

I wish I did not use the biking story--it muddies the water. Do YOU think that those making millions off of others should not pay more in taxes? It is the same thing. What should we expect of others in the top 1 percent? That was the point I was trying to make. I bet you would agree.

[Luminous Animal]

6. I really do not understand your complaint about courteous drivers.

While they may be showing common sense and courtesy to give you a safe wide berth, a thank you in response is merely displaying similar common courtesy.

And, as for your friend's stupid comment... I doubt your thanks or anyone else's would influence an already courteous driver to continue to be courteous.

[digonswine]

10. No-

I am not complaining about courteous drivers.

I am not talking about courtesy--I am talking about my and others' safety. Big difference, as I see it.

If a driver does anything other than what I explained in the OP--they are being unsafe.

I don't expect congratulations every time I don't brandish a sharp stick in a stranger's face.

[Luminous Animal]

18. You honestly think a wave or a smile or a thank you is a congratulations?

Most people consider that being friendly or nice. But there is no rule about that... you don't have to be friendly or nice. Sometimes, other drivers on country roads, strangers in fact, will wave when I drive by. What the fuck is up with that? I don't know those people. Some people say thank you to the bus driver. What the fuck is up with that... it's the bus drivers fucking job! I wave at slow drivers on two lane roads when they use the pull to the right to make it easier to pass. What the fuck is up with that? That's what drivers are supposed to do!

But now that I know a wave or a nod from a bicyclist is not a friendly gesture it's some kind of resentful Pavlovian conditioning, the next time it happens, I'm flippin' the bird and yelling, "Fuck you! I just doing what I'm fucking supposed to be doing motherfucker!"

[digonswine]

19. That is a funny post!

"some kind of resentful Pavlovian conditioning"--Love it.

I do not represent all bikers and I don't hate safe drivers. I drive too.

I should not have included the bike story at all. My point was more about the affluent, and how praise is heaped upon them when donating some small percentage of their net worth.
It is not about courtesy or driving. I look at it the other way---if I had wealth-how would I decide to use it and what amount is appropriate for me to use on myself and what should be others'. I am not into the idea that one can "earn" billions of dollars. I would, I hope, personally feel like a tremendous dink grabbing and hoarding cash. I hold myself to a standard that I don't think is very high.

[NNN0LHI]

11. I take control of my own personal safety when I am walking my dog along the street

I walk on the side of the road so I am walking against the traffic and can see what is coming toward me and make my own adjustments as needed. Get off the road? Whatever? I am not going to depend on someone driving a car around me to ever do the right thing and be a "good driver."

Counting on others for your safety is suicidal.

Don

[digonswine]

15. I don't count on others for my safety-

I always assume, whether driving, biking, or walking, that the driver of the next car is completely incompetent. This seems to work well.

My complaint was that we tend to congratulate those displaying baseline behaviors. This extends wayyyyyy beyond driving safety. That was just an example.

[Fumesucker]

22. If you drive a car you count on others for your safety..

It only takes a fraction of a second to be involved in a head on collision with 100 mph differential speed between the two vehicles..

If you are riding a bicycle it's illegal to ride on the side facing traffic, by law you have to have your back to traffic.

[amyrose2712]

13. "slob the knobs"

[demoblemocratic]

14. amen.

[surrealAmerican]

17. Your friend is right, but there's another reason too:

We all do dozens of reasonable, responsible things every day, usually with no recognition. A little wave of thanks can make the world a friendlier place for someone who might need a little recognition. It's just plain nice.

[digonswine]

20. This is true-

I was talking more about the wealthy and what perhaps be expected from them rather than driving safety and courtesy. I should have left the bike stuff out--too distracting I guess.

[calendargirl]

25. What should be expected of them?

Nothing. It's their money, and they are entitled to do with it as they see fit. You don't have to approve. I believe that if you did your research, you'd find that the ultra-wealthy contribute great sums to charitable causes. It's all relative. Do you round up all of your spare change every day and dole it out to the less fortunate? Doubt it.

And as for the courtesy wave, get over yourself. Being polite is such a hardship, isn't it?

[digonswine]

26. More SHOULD be expected of them-

I do not think that individuals-as people-in a world where their excess millions could help people to not starve or to not lose a home or to pay for a bit of life-saving meds-those with more have a responsibility to those less well-off. Face it---they most likely got their money from the common's money traveling upward to them. So yeah--I think some banker dick SHOULD give more than working stiffs like me. Call it higher taxes if you want. I will never, ever buy into the rationale that it is "their" money.

It is true that I don't give every spare penny to those more in need. I do not have many pennies to spare. Some of these folks actively fucked over the less fortunate to become wealthy. Don't tell me it is their money. Pure bullshit.

[Shagbark Hickory]

21. Is it really that much trouble to say thank you?

LEt someone know they did something you approve of by saying thank you.

[Safetykitten]

23. The Kardashians give us hours of enjoyment. It's their little contribution.