Focus On The Family Warns Of The Dangers Of "Emo-Porn"

[meegbear]

Focus on the Family is warning that women today are being seduced by "emo-porn," which is not actually pornographic at all but simply soap operas and romance novels which create unrealistic images of attentive and loving husbands:

Loneliness strikes at the heart of both husbands and wives, but tends to plunge deeper into the emotional expanse of women. This is one reason why wives are seduced by “emo-porn,” virtual infidelity that is more emotionally satisfying before it physically pleases. But like salt water, it creates a worsening thirst. With emo-porn, fantasy men perform stunningly between the sheets of conversation, emotional understanding, and emotional dexterity. Most mortal men cannot deliver such behavior, the way men do in soap operas and romance novels. Just as wives rightly complain when compared to the artificially created women of Internet porn, men should complain when compared to the artificial men of daytime television. Interesting, isn’t it, how they have such exciting jobs—no Joe The Plumbers. In the real world where real men burn through a lot of emotional battery life to make a real living, being expected to behave like men who don’t exist is more than wrong. It’s cruel.

Emo-porn creates caricatures in the minds and hearts of wives. Most men just aren’t and cannot be that attentive, especially in marriage where responsibilities to provide weigh heavy upon them. Husbands are quietly deemed unresponsive and uncaring when compared to emotionally dexterous hunks of daytime lore, chat rooms, celebrity rags, and romance novels. Thus a secretive and snowballing form of marital discontent is born and nurtured.

http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/focus-family-warns-dangers-emo-porn

Ladies, you have been warned.

[blogslut]

1. Because bodice-ripping

...(and all that implies) is so much better.

:sarcasm:

[pipi_k]

2. Oh...feeling a little insecure, are they? n/t

[Bluenorthwest]

3. The right loves that 'Emo' word, don't they?

nt

[yurbud]

5. next they'll go after Tickle Me Emo

[Fumesucker]

13. I've heard it some here on DU too...

Always makes me wonder..

[demmiblue]

19. I know... I thought this post was going to be about Emo Progressives!

:rofl:

[Canuckistanian]

16. They like the word 'porn' better

They use it so often.

[Dulcinea]

73. They should be more worried about reality TV.

If they're really concerned about America's moral decay, watch "16 & Pregnant."

[reggie the dog]

101. the right wing must love that blink 182 are back together

[LaurenG]

4. Then all novels must be emo porn if they create caricatures

of relationships. I think there is great danger from groups like focus on the family.

[FSogol]

6. Haw-haw, the FOF jerks can't be as attentive as fictional characters.

:rofl:

[JustAnotherGen]

7. No

Just most Focus on the Family type of men aren't capable of that. My liberal love is fully capable of being both 'productive' and a 'lover/best friend/emotional partner/emotional intimacy' . . . but then again most liberal men LIKE women and appreciate us. Not all - but the vast majority do. Men who like women in general make better lovers/friends and emotional support. The fill the cup!

[lapislzi]

8. FoF should be more worried about True Blood

And the weekly bonanza of cute boy butt!

[xmas74]

68. You aren't kidding!

Oh my! You need a cold shower after watching that show!

[marions ghost]

9. "cruelty to un-emo men"

:puke:

call the Waaaaahhhhmmmmbulance

[Broderick]

10. I don't need to read this but could some clue me in to what the fuck

EMO PORN is?

[MicaelS]

14. According to them "soap operas and romance novels"

Damn they're worried about this NOW? They're hardly any soaps left on TV. A grand total of FOUR are left, down from a high of 19.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soap_opera

Soap opera ratings have fallen precipitously in the U.S. since the 1990s. A daily average of 6.5 million viewers watched soaps during the 1991–92 TV season, while just 1.3 million watched in 2009–2010. No new daytime soap opera has been created since 1999, while many have been cancelled. SOAPnet, which largely airs soap opera reruns, will close in early 2012 due to lack of viewership. In 2012, only four daytime soap operas – General Hospital, Days of our Lives, The Young and the Restless, and The Bold and the Beautiful – will air on the three major networks, down from 12 in 1990-91 and a high of 19 in 1969-70.

The years 2009-2011 have seen the fall of America's veteran soaps. The longest-running program in television and radio history, Guiding Light, barely reached 1.5 million daily viewers in 2009 and was ended. As The World Turns aired its final episode in 2010 after a 54 year run. As The World Turns was the last of 20 soap operas produced by Procter & Gamble, the same company that initiated the "soap opera" expression back in the 1930s.<15> All My Children and One Life to Live, each having an over four-decade run, were both cancelled from ABC's schedule in 2011.

Beginning in the 1970s, as women increasingly worked outside of the home, daytime television viewing declined. Since more people were at work, fewer people are available to watch daytime serials. New generations of potential viewers were not raised watching soaps with their mothers, leaving the long and complex story lines foreign to younger audiences. The rise of cable television and the internet have also provided new sources of entertainment during the day. Part of the genre's decline has also been attributed to audiences switching to reality programming as a source of TV melodrama.

Daytime programming alternatives like talk shows and game shows are less expensive to produce than scripted dramas, making those formats more profitable and attractive to networks, even if they receive the same or slightly lower ratings than soaps. Compounding the financial pressure on scripted programming was an advertising recession resulting from the financial crisis of 2007–2010, causing shows to reduce their budgets, sometimes resulting in cast reductions.

[Broderick]

22. I did a google search

Same as regular porn but emotional porn? Who wants emotions when watching porn? That is like plot or something. HAHA.

[Courtesy Flush]

78. The OP was pretty clear about it. nt

[LetTimmySmoke]

11. Just because of this, I'm going to check out emo-porn later on today.

Congrats religious right! You are truly the best publicists.

[Generic Other]

12. And so we present buttcrack lazyboy porn instead

easier for the men to look better.

Yeah. That husband channelsurfing and snoring on the couch just can't compete with Fabio.

:sarcasm:

[jdadd]

32. I just had to put this in there....

#Rick%20Perry%20King%20of%20Porn%3F

[Generic Other]

38. No way...more like this!

[jdadd]

66. Ok Gotcha!!

When I first read the headline, I thought it said Emu-porn....

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQIMBesEVfccSId47PKWC1ZEp3oPvtPr63Gfxhpgdwqcz03SqLo-A

[meegbear]

45. BWAH-HAHAHAHAHA!!!

[SpiralHawk]

81. "You rang?" - Fabio (R - Cholesterol-free Emo Porn Star)

[Generic Other]

105. That's almost phallic in this context!!

OMG!!!

[EstimatedProphet]

15. OK, I'm torn

On the one hand, I think continual bombardment of fantasy images about how relationships should work is probably a bad idea. The alternative to "emo-porn" for men would be something like the Swedish Bikini Team, I suppose, and I think that only seeing what the media says is the ideal body ends up twisting self-image and image expectations out of other people.

On the other hand, are they out of their fucking minds?

[chrisa]

17. So, they admit to being inadequate?

Wahhhh! My tiny little ego got bruised. Wahhhhh!

[FLPanhandle]

18. I think I'm an attentive and loving husband

Where's my soap opera series?

Just because these guys are assholes, they want their wives to believe there isn't anything better than them out there.

[treestar]

40. Bingo and FOF is trying to sell to wives that they can't do

any better. I guess they've given up on the "man shortage" they used to use on us.

[woodsprite]

20. They won't be happy until we only have the Bible as our only reading book.

Then they'll take that because they'll say we're misinterpreting it and they need to translate so we 'get' the right message.

[FiveGoodMen]

42. Just like the middle ages

[Fumesucker]

50. What use do serfs have for reading?

The Bible is actually a fairly radical book if you interpret it for yourself.

It's really much safer if you let the shamen and shawomen do the reading and interpreting of the Holy Text in the approved manner.

People reading the Bible for themselves can lead to people thinking for themselves.

Wouldn't be prudent..

[MineralMan]

21. Oh, yah. It makes those guys who sit in their recliners and

do nothing while their wives are taking care of business feel guilty. Therefore, it's "porn." Screw that.

Guy up the street from me has a Ford F-350 diesel with a $50K bass boat semi-permanently hooked to it. He's gone most of the time with the boat. His wife, who has three kids, drives a 15-year-old minivan and is out mowing the lawn this afternoon. He went fishing this morning and still isn't back. That's his usual pattern. Lost his job, but no matter...it gives him more time to fish.

[knitter4democracy]

77. Yeah, I'll bet he's "fishing."

That was my marriage--the ex was off "working" while I was driving old cars, doing all the inside and outside work in the house, and doing everything for our kids. He left me for a nurse.

[a la izquierda]

23. My husband is incredibly attentive...

and very sweet and loving- he'd die if he read this. :) But Focus on the Family would hate us, because I make more money than he, and we don't have kids.

[Permanut]

24. James Dobson of Fungus on the Family

did a series of video interviews with Ted Bundy on death row, and Dobson concluded that Bundy was a monster because of his exposure to porn earlier in his life. Bundy, of course, agreed; he was playing Dobson like a three dollar violin.

[Fleshdancer]

25. This is extremely insulting to men.

My husband is great at conversation, emotional understanding, and has emotional dexterity because he's a HUMAN BEING. Humans have emotions. Some may be more comfortable talking about them than others, but I have yet to meet a man who was completely closed off emotionally. Do they exist? I assume they do, but the same can be said for some women as well.

The concept that the average man is a tight-lipped John Wayne type who struts around for the purpose of making money, fucking his wife, and being the king of the house is far more ridiculous than this emo porn shit they've made up.

[undeterred]

26. Yeah, because Christian Fundy men are so fucking great.

:rofl:

[Marrah_G]

75. Ted Haggert did say "We have the best sex!" in the movie Jesus Camp!

He left out the "with meth and male prostitutes" part.

[undeterred]

87. Yeah, but that's probably what he was thinking about when he said it.

[DearAbby]

27. this is funny

from people who have no empathy towards others, advising the flock, never mind about the lack of feeling in your own mate...its normal, shut up and go back to sleep.

[TwilightGardener]

28. This is hilarious. Ladies, just accept the fact that your husband is

an emotionally stunted selfish asshole, stop expecting him to be otherwise, and you will be so much happier!!

[Ilsa]

48. Bingo!!! (Thanks.) nt

[Blue_Tires]

86. it worked for Edith Bunker...

[and-justice-for-all]

29. They need to focus on their own fucking family...nt

[Avalux]

30. "daytime lore, chat rooms, celebrity rags and romance novels" hahahaha!

If I didn't know better, I'd have thought the article is satire. :rofl:

[Missy Vixen]

31. I write romance novels

I also know hundreds of other romance authors. We don't write what we do because we're frustrated or because we just can't sustain a relationship with a "real man". It's a genre written primarily by women for women, and we are still the only group within publishing making a profit - we grossed $1.9 billion last year, as a matter of fact.

I hate to break it to Focus on the Family, but it seems they haven't read a romance novel. Ever. Why shouldn't women expect a mutually supportive, loving relationship with a man? Oh, I get it: Those with low self-esteem are a hell of a lot easier to manipulate and control.

It'll be comical to see what happens when the "inspirational romance" authors get asked for quotes.

[Enthusiast]

70. Me and my wife have read

a number of books by Nora Roberts. We sort of read books together. We find her thriller novels, the ones that always include a steamy romance, to be highly entertaining. I don't even know if they would be classified as "romance novels". Maybe they are "romance thrillers".

But in all honesty, what man could possibly live up to the image of the men in her novels? And what women live the lives of the women in her novels?

I guess if wanted to read about more ordinary people we would read something else, and mostly we do.

Not that I would EVER agree with the idiotic Focus on the Family about anything.

[Missy Vixen]

89. I think you'd be surprised

Nora Roberts writes a sub-genre called "romantic suspense". She's pretty popular! Also, 22% of our readership is men. Plus, there's a big payoff: Women who read romance have 74% more sex than women who don't. I'm sure that's a gigantic head explosion for the Focus on the Family crowd - after all, how dare those women enjoy sex??!?

>But in all honesty, what man could possibly live up to the image of the men in her novels? And what women live the lives of the women in her novels?<

Our guild, Romance Writers of America, has an annual conference, complete with awards ceremony. The women who are on stage accepting their awards aren't talking about the heroes of their books. They're talking about their boyfriends or husbands. The quickest way to get any romance author crying is to ask her what her husband has done to help her during the years and years of writing, editing, and submitting before that first publishing contract and beyond.

Every man has a little romance hero inside of him. I'll bet your wife thinks so, too. The most magical thing that can happen to any of us is falling in love. Why wouldn't we want to write about it?

[Marrah_G]

76. I love the historical romances

Nothing better then a hot bath and a fantasy romance :) Throw in some wine and chocolate an you have bliss!

[Missy Vixen]

91. I like reading historicals, too

They're fun. ;-)

If you want recommendations of new authors, I'm always happy to offer some! Here's a few you might like...

Sherry Thomas
Loretta Chase
Lorraine Heath
Rose Lerner

If you'd like to peel the paint off the bathroom walls...
Anna Campbell

-MV

[Odin2005]

92. Maybe it's because I'm a guy, but how do you read that crap?

I'm the book guy at a thrift store and we are just overflowing with historical romance novels, and most of them seem to evolve situations that, if they are not rape they come pretty damn close. Oh, and the guy is usually an English nobleman or a Native American...

[Marrah_G]

93. They are light, easy to read and completely unreal

It's like watching TV or a movie... Sometimes you want to see a silly light hearted completely unrealistic romance and other times you want to watch something serious and deep.

[Odin2005]

100. Well, I'll admit to not being "normal", I find "light" reading rather boring.

For me the deeper something is the more enjoyable it is. To me a book like A Hundred Years of Solitude is "easy reading".

I need something intellectually stimulating to keep me focused, otherwise I get bored.

[Marrah_G]

102. Everyone has their thing :)

I work two jobs, single mom, life is crazy sometimes. I am a big fan of documentaries, Zombie fiction and non fiction books. But when I need to just zone out and stop thinking so much... cheesy romance novels it is. I don't need to have a long attention span because I can read them in a couple hours.

[Missy Vixen]

95. Boy, sounds like you've read a lot of them

Considering the fact that non-consensual sex hasn't been featured in romance novels for oh, at least thirty years now, you're an expert, aren't you?

I not only read them. I write them. It's nice to know you can denigrate my work (and the work of hundreds of other authors,) by calling it "crap", while demanding respect for YOUR life.

:eyes:

[Odin2005]

98. ACK, I never read them, I just see a lot because I'm the book guy at a thrift store.

I read the backs of them to make sure the books go in the right section and usually the backs give a clue about the plot. I don't know what books you have written, so I can't make a judgment, (and some romance authors, like Nicholas Sparks, are pretty decent), but a lot of them are formulaic, and I hate novels that are formulaic.

[dembotoz]

104. i bet all your heroes work for focus on the family......

a focus on the family romance novel--your next challenge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

congrats on being involved in a type of writing where folks can still make a buck.

pm me your pen name
i would like to read one of your works....

[madrchsod]

33. this is the guy who is behind "emo-porn"

http://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/divorce_and_infidelity/pornography_and_virtual_infidelity/corrosive_influence_of_porn_on_wives.aspx

he`s a real loser......





funny.... google search of "emo-porn" brings up over 18 yr olds...i wonder if he knows that.

[Enthusiast]

71. Red states have a higher divorce rate.

I'm just saying.

[Bucky]

34. I'm going to start referring to encyclopedias as "knowledge porn"

[Enthusiast]

103. Bucky, that is one hell of a post!

"Knowledge porn" LOL!

Care if I use that?

[dtexdem]

35. And then there are the poor victims turned into birds by emu-porn.

;-)

[Xithras]

36. Whining about the corrosive influence of soap operas and romance novels?

Egad, they really DO want to bring back the 1980's! Right down to the conservative talking points!

[Lone_Star_Dem]

37. Someone's insecurities are showing.

How dare women want a man who meets their emotional needs? Don't women understand men cannot do such things? Blah, blah, blah. Whatever.

I'd really hate to be stuck in a relationship with one of these insecure idiots. Luckily there are a lot of great, attentive men who don't find it an unbearable burden to connect emotionally with their partners. Sorry to break it to you Mr. Coughlin, but not all men find it impossible to relate to women on an emotional level. That's just one more of your personal problems you're choosing to project onto others.

Can you imagine how miserable this losers partner must be?

[Generic Other]

39. The best example of Emo-porn

[petronius]

41. Yeah, back off, wimminses! We menz can't live up to your unreasonable demands for

attention and consideration and active engagement in the relationship and ... wait, was that it?

Never mind, then, these FOF types are remarkably useless tools... :eyes:

[LeftyMom]

43. I thought emo porn meant sad people with black-dyed bangs in their eyes going at it. nt

[sofa king]

44. So THAT's what Emo Phillips has been doing!

You can imagine where it must have gone from here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDH9JblkzLM

[eShirl]

47. Yep, the ONLY Emo Porn I need

http://www.emophilips.com/

[Contrary1]

46. They'll be thrilled to hear that "Dallas" is coming back...

JR, Sue Ellen, Bobby, and their offspring will be emoing all over the place.

[Ilsa]

49. Emo-porn PHYSICALLY pleases? Really?

Who knew? :shrug: :banghead:

[Puregonzo1188]

51. I thought this was about actual emo porn, as in pornography featuring people with

side-swept bangs dyed odd colors.

I was sorely disappointed.

[NC_Nurse]

52. Bwahaha! Because it's so much better to have a loveless christian marriage

than to dream of a man who isn't repressed up the wazoo! FOF is always good for a few laughs....

[Aerows]

56. They don't want people to have loving marriages

That might lead to :shudder: pleasure.

A loveless Christian marriage is good, because then nobody is enjoying sex. We can't have that, sex is only for procreation, not recreation! LOL

[seabeyond]

53. i read so much. and so many genres. basically they are saying, ... NO reading

cause mystery, thrillers, sci fi or romance just about all have a relationship going on. i dont find many books where something isnt happening. and they dont often make run of the mill characters in any of the books.

i have heard romance is reading porn. i never agreed. some of the books have... and they do it. and go on with the story. some you dont get any. sometimes just one get together. but it is in all books. i see it more like a pg or r rated movie. BUT

since getting my kindle and some of the on line authors, ... i have really learned that there is written porn. as much written for men as women. so again, does not really fall into what this group is talking about.

not buying it.

[tblue37]

58. He is NOT talking about sex. He means that women are being led to believe that

the emotionally fulfilling relationships they read about or see on TV are actually possible in real life when, according to him, "real men" are too busy earning a living to respond to their women's emotional needs, and it is unfair--cruel, even--to expect them to.

Sex isn't what he is referring to; emotional responsiveness is--you know, like caring how her day went, or how she feels about something, or else paying attention to her when he comes home instead of hsucking down a beer while vegging out in front of the TV.

[seabeyond]

63. but that is what i am saying. they are being selective with romance. but i read the same damn

thing in mystery, thrillers and sci fi. they just have that genre story behind the romance of the "perfect" characters, man and woman. the women are no more average than the man. as a matter of fact, a lot of the supposed romance i will find in mystery, too. and vice versa.

they are just stories. like sleepless in seattle, in print. sleeping with the enemy. tremors.... lol.

[seabeyond]

65. lee childs, koontz, sanford... all have better than average men

with women, in relationships.

[Enthusiast]

72. This is true.

Who could compete with "that fucking Flowers"?

[seabeyond]

74. there is flowers, lol. i am reading a series

on military. starts in afghanistan, goes to the sudan and second book it is in louisianna. bio warfair. one more book after this. it is so good. i am thinking hubby would really like it. BUT... it has a ripped man without clothes on the cover. no way he will read, just cause of the cover. i hate that they put these pictures on cover. i always get shit for them. but it is a good series. brockman series another good one. same thing.

i saw you read nora roberts, too. i love her books. she certainly has learned the process and can get those books out. high noon. good book.

[Enthusiast]

80. Yes. Nora is amazingly prolific.

Although her books are pretty much formulaic, it's a good formula. She is a marvel.

We liked River's End, Blue Smoke, Tribute, Black Hills, Divine Evil, Homeport, Midnight Bayou, The Reef, Carolina Moon, Birthright and, most recently, Chasing Fire. I fully expect to enjoy those we have yet to read.

High Noon sound good. I use this resource. http://www.fantasticfiction.co.uk/

[seabeyond]

82. yea...

cause i read so much and you are right there. lol. i use the same site. the only book i havent read is chasing fire. and you expressed it much better than i. formula, yet she does it in a manner that the books are entertaining and not all the same. but always good.

[Aerows]

54. Oh please

The only people who listen to Focus on the Family are the people that probably aren't reading bodice rippers anyway because they are too worried that someone, somewhere might be enjoying sex. That's what the entire abortion and anti-gay crap is about - the message is sex is WRONG and you should only do it for procreation, and you certainly shouldn't enjoy it.

[Liberal_in_LA]

55. omg. I had no idea what this thread was about. omg.

[LetTimmySmoke]

57. Click on this video

And go to 3:10. Adam Carolla pretty much sums up in one sentence what this whole thing is all about:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88Ygmd0Awws (3:10)

[Shagbark Hickory]

59. Well they're in luck because soap operas are dwindling and probably are soon to be a thing of the

past.

[NoodleyAppendage]

60. So, in other words, "Quit Expecting to be Treated as a Equal you Lesser Beings".

Right-wing Christians are so FUBAR. I've seen everything now.

J

[Proud Liberal Dem]

61. Does that mean that

the "Twilight" books should be banned? :shrug: Talk about unrealistic relationships! ;-)

[seabeyond]

64. exactly... that is what i was saying. it is in every genre of book that i read

we just like to make the "romance" into something more. selective. or they are saying NO to reading.

[Proud Liberal Dem]

83. Books (fiction) wouldn't be any fun/interesting

without some element of fantasy. :shrug: What goes in my (real) life wouldn't be a page turner for sure.

[seabeyond]

85. ya. silly people. nt

[callous taoboy]

62. I have a heaving bosom fetish. This Emo-porn may be right up my alley.

[NMMNG]

67. M'kay

So it's cruel of women to expect their men to be anything but emotionally stunted lumps. FOTF obviously has very low expectations of humanity.

[Enthusiast]

84. "FOTF obviously has very low expectations of humanity. "

And they live up to it! :rofl:

[Solly Mack]

69. LMAO

[SpiralHawk]

79. There is porn on the Intertubes?

Who knew?

[phylny]

88. I'm still harboring nasty and delicious thoughts about

McDreamy, so I guess my husband and our 30-year marriage are doomed.

[Odin2005]

90. LOL, what about all those "god-fearing women" that have gobs of raunchy romance novels?

Seriously, at the thrift store I work at when a donation of books has "Christian" crap it invariably has trashy romance novels, usually involving rich Texas ranchers seducing or raping the farm-hand.

[seabeyond]

94. in the earlier decades of writing

the novels, women were not allowed to be sexually aggressive so to be the good girl and wanted, it would be about rape, yes. a good couple decades ago though, the writing has shifted and i have not seen any of it where the female is about forced. most of the women in the books that i read... (and i read all kinds, all genres) the woman is as sexually empowered and wanting as the man.

i read an article recently talking about the shift by the authors in the writing and the why's.

it reflects the culture we live in. and says something.

[Missy Vixen]

97. I'd like you to provide a few titles

and when they were written. Go ahead. If you're so secure in your knowledge of the romance industry, I'm sure you'll be able to do so. :sarcasm:

The only romance novel I am aware of that even has a hint of non-consensual sexual activity published in the last twenty years is Anna Campbell's "Claiming the Courtesan", which caused a firestorm of debate in the industry.

I just love people who slam romance novels on the whole, and by extension authors, who've never actually read one.

:eyes:

[defendandprotect]

96. Another RW funded Dobson org -- funded by RW Richard Scaife ... !! More Kabuki -- !!

The scariest thing the RW/patriarchs invented was the God "boogie man" -- SATAN --

Focus on the Family is another RW fake to scare everyone -- !!



On the other hand, Comcast and other internet servers are making a billion or so a year

from addictive internet porn which works as rw propaganda to debase and dehumanize females!!

[DirkGently]

99. So ... wives should not expect their needs to be met; just be thankful they aren't married to Rick

Perry?


Interesting logic.


Familiar, somehow.



:D

[laylah]

106. I lived in Colorado Springs

for many years. I have always said I wished these assholes would focus on their own damned families! They have more skeletons than most folks I know, put together.