"We're not used to cooked food."

[MineralMan]

My wife and I don't have kids, but we've had many kids who hung out at our house from time to time, for some reason.

One time, these two kids who lived across the street from us, in a rather troubled household, came over for dinner one night when their parents were having some sort of crisis. So, I made a pot of meatless spaghetti, a very simple, mild recipe and one that has been a big hit with everyone who's eaten it. I'm a pretty good cook.

So, I served it up to these kids, who were real nice kids, about 13 and 15, a girl and boy, respectively. They picked at it, but just didn't get into it. It was the same as usual, and both my wife and I were enjoying it, but the kids obviously weren't They liked the garlic bread, but only picked at the spaghetti. So, I finally asked them if there was something in the spaghetti they didn't like.

The girl apologized to me, and said, "We're not used to cooked food."

I realized, then, that they had grown up eating food from the microwave and other pre-packaged food. It made me sad.

Great kids, but an odd, sad story, I think.

[Mojeoux]

1. Lots of poor babies like this out there.

This is why we need free PUBLIC schools and compassionate teachers!!!!

[pipi_k]

2. Well I have to admit a somewhat similar story...

involving vegetables.

Corn, specifically.

I'm not proud to say this, but when my kids were small I bought a lot of canned stuff.

My daughter was about six or so when she discovered that corn grew on cobs...not in cans. She was amazed...



Anyway, it is pretty sad about those two neighbor kids, but really from the title I was expecting to hear a story about kids who only ate cold cereal or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

[yellerpup]

3. Mr. Pup mentored arts-oriented teen boys from a local

residential facility. My part of the deal was to prepare a dinner to share with the kid so he could observe what a respectful relationship between adults is supposed to look like. I would also send a bag of cookies back to the cottage for him to share with the other residents. The last boy we mentored had never had a sit-down meal in his life. He would put his fork at the edge of his plate and push his food onto it with his thumb. He didn't even know how to hold a knife or fork and would regale us with tales of his family Thanksgivings when his grandmother would come over and bring grain alcohol mixed with grape juice for the kids because it kept them quiet and enabled them to take a long nap after dinner. I don't think he ever had anything but burgers and pizza his whole life. He lost his privileges to be mentored because he kept running away to go back and 'help' his mom. (Her incompetence was the reason he was in the facility) We tried our best and had a record of helping others, but this child was completely lost. I hope someone succeeded in helping him. He was the skinniest boy I've ever seen.

[pipi_k]

4. That's just heartbreakingly sad.... :( n/t

[yellerpup]

14. We were crushed to lose him.

What chance does a young man have in life if he can't handle a knife and a fork? He was the eldest of six and there was no father in the picture for any of them. As you say, heartbreakingly sad. His main concern was to stay by his mother's side no matter what the cost to himself. She was/is toxic to her children. With these kids it seems the worse the mother is, the harder they work to try to 'fix' her (or try to hide the family's true situation).

[pipi_k]

19. Sad foster kids....

My BIL and his wife were taking in foster kids for a while until she got very sick.

Teenaged boys who were shuttled through the court systems until they reached legal age. Some of these kids were hopeless. The parents screwed them up, then didn't want to deal with the results of their shitty parenting choices.

Most of them were really very good kids who only needed a bit of guidance, but what's a court system to do? Find 'em a "home" so they're not living on the streets, make some kind of attempt to get them help, and hope for the best. Many of these kids will probably end up in jail or worse.

:(

[yellerpup]

21. We never made the leap into fostering.

And most of our friends were aghast that we would get involved with PINS because they were afraid we'd be murdered (or something to that effect), but children want direction and these boys had never had that. All kids need someone to care for them, and sadly, there are parents who are just too selfish to make sure they even get the basics. We found that constancy and caring made a difference to most of them. We mentored one very bright fellow who came to us with scars from bullet wounds when he was fifteen. We continued to mentor him until he was 21 and were so proud when he was accepted into a state college after his National Guard training. Then he married a friend who was pregnant with another boy's child because she didn't want to have an abortion and he had to drop out to support his new family. Now he's stuck in a poverty loop with no education or job skills and no way to break out.

I hope your SIL's health is improving. :hug:

[customerserviceguy]

5. There's a lot of that around

My lady just doesn't cook, except for her once-a-year Irish soda bread. I learned how to cook when I was a teenager, and not from Mom, but from working in a restaurant. I was the only dishwasher who cleaned the main cook's tools, etc. the way he liked, and after the boss took off for the evening, he'd teach me some techniques between loads of dishes.

A lot of her friends and my co-workers are amazed by my abilities, but I don't think they're anything terribly special.

[elocs]

6. How is food prepared in a microwave not cooked?

:shrug:

I "cook" food in the microwave all the time. Tonight I cooked fresh broccoli in the microwave and I always cook my rice in the microwave.

[jp11]

8. Probably meaning pre packaged food made to mass appeal with 'flavor' ie

calories/preservatives/artificial flavors etc.

[pipi_k]

32. I don't know about calories and preservatives and stuff, but...

I really like some of Marie Callender's frozen dinners.


When we were kids we ate a fair amount of frozen dinners (late 50s, early 60s) and my mom would wash out the tins and save them.

Every year when Thanksgiving was over she made up her own frozen dinners with the leftovers.

We loved them.

:7

[Manifestor_of_Light]

36. All frozen dinners have too much salt.

I read labels and I get quite disgusted.

I have high blood preessure and don't like salt (except sea salt) anyway.

[Brickbat]

7. When I was on my week at Grandma's in the summer one year I helped her make the week's menu. When

macaroni-and-cheese night came around, I thought her homemade version was weird; I wanted Kraft.

[WatsonT]

9. That is amazingly telling

and sad.

[seabeyond]

10. my kids tell me it is more fast food/restaurant 4, 5, 6 times a week.

i have been hearing this from kids for years. i cook 5 days, mon-fri. hubby will take one weekend. and then one is a free for all or take out of some kind.

we seem to not be the norm.

[leftstreet]

11. Next time they come over, heat the spaghetti sauce in the microwave

It's horrifying to think any child would apologize for something like that

[Codeine]

12. My fiancee grew up on fast food.

Their family ate at drive-thrus four or five nights a week, and occasionally on the way to school as well. And it wasn't the time-worn excuse of "parents working two jobs/no time" but rather sheer-ass laziness, which is more often than not the real reason people eat this way. I'm trying to show her a better way of eating, but a lifetime of that garbage in your formative years poisons your ability to enjoy real food, it seems.

[sammytko]

13. What is meatless spaghetti?

Is it spaghetti with meatless sauce? Maybe the sauce was too mild? Too watery? Mushy? too firm?

[MineralMan]

16. Think Spaghetti Pomodoro

The recipe was made with tomatoes from my garden. The only thing that wasn't fresh was one small can of tomato paste. Not mushy. Not firm. Not too spicy or too mild. Like I said, I'm a good cook. You'd love my spaghetti, I guarantee.

[ensho]

25. just what it says - no meat anywhere

I used to use thin or angel hair spaghetti but now I like using mini bow ties.

way back when I was raising a family and before meat was contaminated and animals kept in a cruel way I used ground pork in the sauce.

[Odin2005]

15. That is sad beyond belief.

:(

[MineralMan]

17. Thanks for all the replies.

I think the kids thought spaghetti only came from Chef Boyardee. Mine was made with fresh ingredients and the flavors were just too damned bright and real for them, I guess. I never met anyone else who didn't gobble it up.

It was a sad, and eye-opening experience.

[madmom]

18. When my daughter left home, the first time she came back she said the thing

she missed the most was the sit down family meals we have EVERYDAY! They are not always "home-made" but 95% are.

[lapislzi]

Even if it's pizza

My husband and I and our boys always sit at the table. It can get a little raucous at times, with ADHD kid and Mr. Know-It-All going head to head about the latest episode of Top Gear or their latest Halo experience, but it's Family Time.

[ensho]

27. lol I had a Mr. Know It All son too - and I called him that until he got over it

we all ate at the table every nite too and I did as a child

when they were teens, 1 nite a wk. I put sandwhich makings and a condiment dish on the table and various kinds of bread and everyone made their own -

and my kids, even into their teens had to have a glass of milk for dinner - no sodas.

[snooper2]

20. A lot of people are lazy these days..

I was busting my ass cleaning the whole house on Sunday, floor, kitchen, cabinets, cut front and back yard. Cleaned up garage...

Go to Sister-in-law on Sunday and she was sitting there in her dirty ass apartment with her live in boyfriend. Bathroom nasty, kitchen trashed, and they have been playing video games all weekend.

Of course, they can't cook either. She texted my wife earlier in the week asking how to cook chicken soup. She thought you just start by throwing the whole chicken in a pot of water. My wife was like, if you want to die :rofl:

[Codeine]

23. Dirty people vex me sorely.

Cleaning your house is easy, and takes only a few minutes if you do it daily. When I was dating women would come to my apartment and be shocked that it was neat and tidy and clean. Then I'd visit their places and see why they were surprised.

[seabeyond]

31. hm... lol

add a couple thousand sq feet, two kids, and an acre yard full of gardens, to that. lol. oh and a lifetime.

we like to write, i love you, on the dust on the furniture.

when i was single and 1200 sq ft house, i too could make comments like yours.

but then also, i have a brother a lot like you. the most obsessively neat and clean freak i have known. i say with love. i have paid him to come to my house and help me clean. he is that good. and proud of it.

(actually, i need to get on the cleaning today, and procrastinating.)

[City of Mills]

22. Sounds like a bit too much real flavor

And the pasta was probably too firm for them, Chef Boyardee can be eaten without teeth...that's too bad. Got me thinking about my own mom, both my parents worked full time and sure, we'd occasionally have something frozen or canned, but what I recall most from my childhood is home cooked meals (and a pretty wide variety of stuff). My mom took a night class in cooking at one point as well. I was a lucky kid. My dad told us of eating hot dog soup as a kid, and banana sandwiches on white bread.

[Dreamer Tatum]

24. Um, kids hang around your house, despite you having none?

Ew.

[msanthrope]

26. Not every childless adult is a pervert. n/t

[seabeyond]

33. nor dislikes kids. we had a couple houses growing up. and a kid can feel

they know when they are just enjoyed and they like it too

[Bill McBlueState]

28. Good for him;

we need more of this. To paraphrase a book title from the nineties, kids are better off when the broader community participates in raising them.

[MineralMan]

37. Ew? Really. On what do you base that?

My wife and I have always enjoyed knowing the children in our neighborhood. In our old home in California and in our new home in Saint Paul, MN, our neighbors all know us and have told their kids to knock on our door if they're ever scared or worried about something when their parents aren't at home. I'm the neighborhood bike fixer, mean dog chaser, band-aid provider, and an old fart who's always willing to listen to a kid or show him or her something new. My wife always has a plate of cookies around. We're the neighborhood safe house, and our big picture window is always open. We both work at home, and keep an eye on whatever's going on in the neighborhood. We can be counted on to buy the kid's school fundraising crap and to lend an ear when needed. We're trusted by all the parents because we're trustworthy. Your little dig is incorrect and unwelcome. Feh!

[titaniumsalute]

29. I love homecooked food

My wfie and I both have jobs that take up time in the evening and weekends. We have two kids (boys.) While I'll admit we eat out often we do try to cook as often as possible. With a crockpot anything is possible. Right now we have a pork roast with carrots, onions and potatos cooking away at home. Yummy! The kids love it too.

[Aerows]

30. Well, here's an example from my family

I went to my sister's house (she has two kids) for Thanksgiving, and I was elected to cook the dinner. There is a good reason for that.

Her pots were dusty. Draw your own conclusions about how often anything has ever been cooked in her house. One of my nieces stayed with my parents for a while, and it was the first time the kid had ever eaten fried chicken before - and certainly never home made fried chicken.

My sister and her husband have very good jobs, and interestingly enough are fundies, but they don't even make coffee (or like it). They drink diet Pepsi in the morning, the kids eat pop-tarts and McDonald's is a staple in their diet. Then they wonder why the 11 year old has weight issues.

I'm hardly a food nazi, since I have been known to visit a Taco Bell or a McDonald's before, but I want at least one meal a day with vegetables, and most of the time it is cooked by me. My sister and I grew up with the same parents - parents who make coffee and iced tea, but somehow, she just didn't seem to absorb anything to do with cooking.

[Stevenmarc]

34. Well Jesus was big into providing Christians fast food with the whole loaves and fishes thing

[Erose999]

35. My sister is too lazy to cook. My neices eat a diet of candy, TV dinners, and Mickey D's. They

usually get one homecooked meal a day when they visit my parents place after school, but my uncle does the cooking there and it's always greasy southern food (breaded and fried meat + biscuits and gravy for every meal, no vegetables ever). My mom is disabled (ALS) and on a high fat diet so she needs all that stuff.

School lunch is probably the most nutritious/healthy thing my neices eat. They are 7 and 8 and appear healthy now but I worry about the effects of this diet when they get older.