This is what REALLY happened during the raid on Osama's compound.

[Fuzz]

A freeper posts this from a, wait for it, friend of a friend. And they are buying it over there as being plausible and a possibility.


This arrived in my in box, forwarded from a friend of a friend. I rewrote it and reworded it, to protect the chain of information. Some of you may know I was an officer in the Teams a few decades back. I still have contacts among the active duty community, and former frogs who are now working "in country" as security contractors.

Here's what really happened. OBL was taken down on the third floor, that's true. He was cornered and then jacked up. He was then, deliberately in front of hysterical witness, shot in the face and head with red 9mm paintball "simunitions" out of an MP5. Real blood was thrown around for effect. In the crazy glare of battle lights it all looked quite realistic, and the witnesses will go to their graves believing they saw OBL killed in front of them. But that didn't happen.

He was stunned, knocked out with a hand taser, then hooded and bagged and dragged out to the helos. Then a dummy was "buried at sea" in his place, no photos are going to be released, and here we are. The world believes OBL is dead, so the agency and foreign interrogators don't have to be gentle with him during his prolonged "debriefing" in a secret safehouse prison with only one guest. This was their "best case scenario" among the options confronting them depending on the amount of resistance encountered in the compound and the house. They achieved their optimal goal, the "jackpot." OBL is alive and under interrogation in a secret safehouse, and the world believes he's dead.

[glockshox]

1. Yup

[WilliamPitt]

2. I just pissed myself laughing.

Wow.

[LynneSin]

13. So that was the weird smell I smelt in the DU lounge

:rofl:

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

28. .

[geardaddy]

15. You must have had asparagus for lunch.

;)

[Solomon]

20. Man, asparagus will do it, won't it?

First time I ate it I couldn't believe it. LOL Beer got nothing on asparagus.

[LynneSin]

30. You know there are only so many vegetables I love to eat...

so it pains me that my favorite causes such grief!

[geardaddy]

35. Odiferous!

:D

[Contrary1]

38. I fully expected that someone would cast asparagus on this factual account...

and there you go.

[geardaddy]

43. Why you...

Spread out!

[trueblue2007]

44. me too. repukes are the stupidest people in the world

[alcibiades_mystery]

3. Ludicrous

They have fevered imaginations over there.

[northoftheborder]

4. your account is not plausible to me

[seabeyond]

5. and see, deliver photos and would have been same story with photoshopped picture. nt

[n2doc]

6. Yep. Sounds reasonable to me

:rofl:

[nadinbrzezinski]

7. How to go down to the lies?

Once a team member always a team member. this means.. you do not talk... nor spread rumors.

Yes, I've known a few operators in my life, from two nations... and those people ain't talking or spreading rumors.

So thanks for freeper for the nice fantasy.

[kentuck]

8. Wow!

What an imagination!

But not impossible. However, I don't think they would attempt such an intricate "trick" under such dangerous conditions that depended on seconds and minutes.

[WinkyDink]

9. "And then I woke up."

[meegbear]

10. Well my next door neighbor's, cousin's, stepbrother's, girlfriend was like totally there ...

and she said that OBL is like, dead and stuff.

[Sherman A1]

18. And then...

Off to the Mall for Shopping!!!!

[Tommy_Carcetti]

11. And I've got the video to prove it, right here:

Not a Rickroll, I promise:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gM5TjSOQ48

[skypilot]

12. I believe it.

He's having tea with Elvis somewhere.

[blondeatlast]

14. Said Freeper should be enormously pleased with Obama, then--ObL is both "dead" and talking.

:rofl:

[postulater]

16. We're probably getting better info from the hard drives

they seized than they ever would directly from OBL.

With what they found they don't need him physically anymore.

[liberal_mama]

17. I want to know if Freepers

have received any credible education at all? It's amazing what they'll believe!

[Solomon]

19. Wow. And I thought the story that Obama wouldn't do it and the

CIA took over and did it anyway was the one that took the cake.

This one is much crazier. But it doesn't fit with the freeper narative about Obama.

[rurallib]

21. Are they having some kind of contest over there?

Funniest?
Most ludicrous?
Can we get it published on DU?
Will FUX run with this one?

first prize - a month of freeperville free. 2nd prize - lifetime in freeperville free.

[PeaceNikki]

22. Holy shit, my first pass of this I missed the "A freeter posts this..." line

And I thought *YOU* were passing this off as "truth".

holy shit, whew. DU's had some "moments" lately.

[Fuzz]

47. Lmao

[Name removed]

23. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[alcibiades_mystery]

27. Ha!

:spray:

It's super sad that you spent that much time typing nonsense.

[Peace Patriot]

31. What's "super sad" is saps who believe anything the CIA/Pentagon asserts, especially when

they dumped the evidence at sea.

Notice I slash them together--CIA/Pentagon. Not too long ago they were at war, with one creating its own spy shop (Rumsfeld's "Official of Special Plans") to get around the other, and one outing the other's agents, and one saying one thing, and the other saying the opposite about WMDs in Iraq, etc., etc. Now the head of one is switching with the head of the other--a very unusual event--as if it doesn't matter that one does war and the other does intel.

I notice things like this, and ask why. It's called thinking. Our country wouldn't be in such a godawful mess if our people did more thinking and less believing of what "the authorities" tell them.

[alcibiades_mystery]

39. Luckily, you're in a fringe minority

So your rantings can't do much harm.

Have fun with your parlor game.

[pipi_k]

40. One really good reason why they "got rid of the body" so quickly...

Embalming is forbidden in Islam.

http://www.paakfuneral.com/embalming.html



Burial as quickly as possible is the goal.

Another good reason not to keep the body lying around is...what the hell are they going to do with a rotting body and no place to bury it?

What country would want his body in its soil? What sane country would want his grave site to become a shrine to AQ?


I'll grant that we can't always trust our government farther than we can throw it, but that doesn't mean it lies all the time.

There really ARE very good reasons as to why OBL's body was gotten rid of quickly.

[sufrommich]

45. Obviously, laughable conspiracy theories aren't just for freepers. nt

[AsahinaKimi]

24. wait...wait... I know what comes next....

Maulder and Skully finds OBL and he has this black gunk in his eyes...

Having found out the truth they both realize they are in huge trouble..but they need to find a way to clear themselves, but its too late...Assistant Director Walter Skinner calls Maulder's cell phone, and tells him he has to come in to be questioned, but Maulder knows that the smoking man is in on it. He Has Skully drive him out to this field in Montana....

(Key the Theme song..)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDZBgHBHQT8&feature=related

um yeah, I am sure the script will be written soon.

[Rosie1223]

25. Somebody's been watching re-runs of "24" n/t

[Yavin4]

26. This Information Arrived in his "in box". Then It Must Be True.

Come on. It's gotta be true.

[Brickbat]

29. I think my favorite line is "Real blood was thrown around for effect."

:rofl:

[Sparkly]

36. That part really fooled the witnesses.

:rofl:

[Blue-Jay]

32. Occam begs to differ.

[benld74]

33. I thought Freepers were AGAINST Marijuana,,,,,?!

[Sparkly]

34. The elite SEALS were playing paintball.

Extra points for creativity. :eyes:

[pipi_k]

42. Only because they didn't have enough change for the arcade games n/t

[lunatica]

37. And OBL's wives will back the story up.

[Iggo]

41. '...to protect the chain of information...'

Is that even a real thing?

[Motown_Johnny]

46. Wouldn't this be something that the Freepers would support?

So are they claiming that Obama has achieved an even greater victory than the one he is claiming?


Why would they go there? This is something the lefty nut jobs should be claiming instead.

[MH1]

49. my first thought exactly.

I'm not really sweating what happened to the jackass myself, unless he suddenly pops up undeniably alive somewhere, and I'm pretty confident that won't happen.

What these idiots don't get about conspiracies is that ACTUAL conspiracies only succeed if they involve a very small number of conspirators. Don't see how that could have been the case here, ergo no conspiracy, ergo it's pretty much as reported, and differing accounts just happen for the usual reasons.

[Modern_Matthew]

48. I still wouldn't care. The man deserves anything that comes his way. nt