An Open Letter to Delusional Rightwing Folks

scheming daemons

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Wed May-04-11 07:42 AM
Original message

An Open Letter to Delusional Rightwing Folks

Edited on Wed May-04-11 07:56 AM by scheming daemons

* Reposted because I called them a bad word in the original subject

I understand what you're feeling.

You want so very badly to feel happy that your boogeyman, Osama bin Laden, has been killed.

You masturbated yourself to sleep at the very thought of it for almost a decade.

But something about this whole situation doesn't feel right to you. You can't figure out why the news just isn't making you as happy as you thought it would.

I'll help you out.

It's because our cool-as-ice black President is the one that got it done.

The cognitive dissonance that is present in your mind (go ahead, look up the term... I'll wait........ ok, time's up) won't allow you to accept that a black man named Barack Hussein Obama, on behalf of YOU, eliminated your boogeyman.

You're feeling an odd sense of grief over an event that you thought would make you happy.

So you twist yourself in rhetorical knots trying to find a way to do ANYTHING but give Barack Obama any credit. "If only I can find a way to give the credit to a REAL American, then I can feel happy about this event like I am supposed to."

But deep down, you know that your guy dropped the ball.

And not just on bin Laden.

(You know that the economy went into a tailspin in 2008 under your guy, because of the policies of your guy. But that's a letter for another day when you're in denial about dropping unemployment and a growing economy as we go into the election next year.)

You, my rightwing nutjob friend, are in the midst of the Kubler-Ross Five Stages of Grief.

Don't worry, though. You're only a few stages away from "Acceptance" and that's good news for the country, if not for your psyche.

The Five Stages of Grief:

Denial: "Osama's not really dead. This whole thing HAS to have been staged."

Anger: "How DARE that Kenyan usurper try to claim credit for this! It was a Republican President who left office two and a half years ago that deserves the credit!"

Bargaining: "Come on, media. Come on, Rush/Beck/Hannity. Get the story out there that the military did this in defiance of Obama's order to stand down! Doesn't matter if it is true! Get the story out there! Please!!!"

Depression: "What's the use. The MSM, combined with our lame-ass candidates, is going to leave us with four more years of a President that doesn't look like he's one of us."

Acceptance: "Time to look to 2016."

Grief is hard. Especially when you aren't really sure why you're grieving. When you think you should be happy, but you don't know why you are not.

It's a by-product of brain-washing. And someday you might even grow out of it. Many have in the past. Sadly, though, many have not.

Just get through your "bargaining" phase soon, eat a quart of ice cream to get you through your "depression" phase, and then you'll finally reach "acceptance".

And I promise you it will all be alright.

Love,

-- Your friendly neighborhood liberal