Masturbation is Good For You! (Squirrels too) - Sorry weirdo anti-masturbation candidate...

[RainDog]

http://www.slate.com/id/2223013/pagenum/all/#p2

In a research paper published yesterday, titled "The Adaptive Function of Masturbation in a Promiscuous African Ground Squirrel," biologist Jane M. Waterman analyzes the self-pleasuring behavior of a population of squirrels in east-central Namibia. She concludes that masturbation may help to keep the genitals clean and stave off sexually-transmitted infections. In a "Science" column first published last summer and reprinted below, Daniel Engber examined onanism across the animal kingdom.

The recent finding that masturbation improves the quality of human sperm supports the notion that it's an evolved trait and not merely a byproduct of our physiology. According to a branch of evolutionary theory called "sperm competition" that developed in the late-1960s, natural selection can produce just such a change in reproductive behavior. The theory focuses on polyandrous species—i.e., those in which a single female takes multiple partners and the sperm from several potential fathers might end up competing to fertilize the same egg. Under those conditions, the relative quality of male ejaculate very clearly determines whose genes are passed on to the next generation.

Can evolution account for female masturbation in the animal kingdom?

We don't really know. The problem is, scientists haven't paid that much attention to the issue. The systematic study of animal masturbation didn't really emerge until the end of the 19th century...

Well, good for the goose and all that, in its own way since orgasms do release all sorts of happy-think chemicals in the brain.

That's why doctors used to provide this service for females...all in the interest of women's health, of course. And they paid for this...

[Larry Ogg]

1. This should be good...

Think I will hang around for a while...

:popcorn:

[BootinUp]

2. Its hard to believe thats a real poster, lol. nt

[RainDog]

4. "it is curing the hopeless and those pronounced uncurable."

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Sheepshank]

3. I swear that's a picture of Joseph Smith

...in action. "Of course" he'd say, "it's only for medicinal purposes."

[Politicalboi]

5. He's just a

Gigolo! Anytime, anyplace, anywhere.

[RainDog]

6. "through the magic power of a fine, gentle massage"

in multiple type fonts, too!

[DirkGently]

7. That poster is CLASSIC. And I have new respect for squirrels.

[RainDog]

8. however, the job was time-consuming for doctors, which led the invention of large mechanical devices

that could treat patients within 10 minutes while in the doctor's office.

but then...

the treatment was so useful and so recommended doctors could help patients treat themselves... at home! The demand led to the first hand-held motor! Yes, vibrators are the mother of invention of the hand-held motor. Another part of our hidden history.

[DirkGently]

14. It's so ... large. I think I used one of those to sand off the old paint in the back bedroom.

[Sheepshank]

15. I have a Hamilton Beach food mixer...it's a workhorse

wonder if there is another type of attachment they sell?

[Tyrs WolfDaemon]

9. First we had to worry about foxes...

being in the chicken coops. Now we have to worry that the squirrels are in there choking the chickens.:evilgrin:

edit: spelling

[RainDog]

10. LOL! n/t

[Tyrs WolfDaemon]

11. It took a minute to decide...

chickens
midgets
smurfs
other?:shrug:

[RainDog]

12. All I know is... I'm gonna look at the squirrels in my yard in a whole new way now

or, rather, avert my eyes.

[Tyrs WolfDaemon]

13. I'm more worried about

Them looking in. Although I'm not much of a looker so I probably don't need to worry much.