Limbaugh: Conservatives ‘Far More Likely’ to Be Ignorant

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

Following a Pew Research Center poll (http://pewresearch.org/pubs/1701/poll-obama-muslim-christian-church-out-of-politics-political-leaders-religious}in which only 34% of Americans identified President Obama as being Christian, conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh was caught in one of those awkward moments that sometimes happen in radio and television when those talking believe they are off the air.

Shortly after blasting the so-called “liberal media” for failing to report, as Limbaugh phrased it (http://mediamatters.org/mmtv/201008190033), that “one in 10 Democrats believes Imam Obama is a Muslim,” the Porcine Pill Popper, believing his listeners were hearing a sixty second commercial from one of his biggest sponsors — an online Mexican pharmacy — noted that 34% of conservative Republicans participating in the poll believe that the President is a Muslim. He then added, “In other words, conservative Republicans are far more — almost 3 1/2 times more — likely (than Democrats) to be ignorant.”

“I fail to see how this should come as a surprise to anybody,” said Meegan Toomey, Professor of Modern Media at Pueblo State University, “After all, how else could one explain the fact that Limbaugh’s audience is 3 1/2 times as large as any radio host who makes sense.”

Professor Toomey also provided illuminating figures from a recent poll conducted by her department at Pueblo State which revealed that while 76% of Republicans believe that Rush Limbaugh is a Christian, only 22% of Democrats identified him as such. Conversely, 34% of Republicans and 92% of Democrats responded that they believe he is a major douchebag.

According to his press agent, the Bard of Bombast was not available for comment because he was in a music studio recording a duet version of ‘Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word’ with Elton John.

Sponsors of Limbaugh’s radio program seem unfazed by the controversy. ’Hooked-on-Phonics’, a longtime sponsor, issued a statement saying that, “although there may be some concern on our part that Mr. Limbaugh could potentially lose some listeners, we are confident, as has been our experience, that those who have use for our products and services will remain loyal to the program”. According to company spokesman Chaim Eyjafjallajokull (pronounced HI-yum), “When it comes to publicity — as they say in show business — what’s important is not what the article says, but how long it is. Free press is free press. As much as Mr. Limbaugh may dislike that particular expression, any attention he draws benefits us as sponsors.”

[Curmudgeoness]

1. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. I hope this isn't a joke. I love it. nt

[Winterblues]

34. It is from The Desperate Blogger, that should answer your question

:shrug:

[OneGrassRoot]

2. Is the clip of him saying that about conservatives in the video link?

I ask because I don't want to listen to him unless I have to, but if he's on air saying that, I'm posting for all the dittohead/Facebaggers (Facebook teabaggers) I know!

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

7. Sorry...

... just a fantasy (based on a deep seeded belief) of mine... (hence, the name...)

[OneGrassRoot]

9. Oh shit, I wanted to believe!!! LOL

I only scanned and didn't pay close enough attention.

My bad. :blush:

:hi:

[Mimosa]

3. So, he knows his listeners are ignorant? n/t

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

18. Absolutely...

... It goes to his character -- he laughs (all the way to the bank) at those ignorant enough to make him wealthy...

[stubtoe]

28. Yes of course. He relies on that for his bread and butter.

[Angry Dragon]

4. I have never heard rush say he is a christian

so he must be a Muslim, atheist, or a agnostic.

And if he claims to be a christian then he needs to produce the papers to prove that...... just saying
Come on rush, where are your papers?? Can't produce them??

[Kurovski]

5. "Porcine Pill Popper"

That's way too sexy for Lintball.

*DUzy*

The whole "What's his religion" thing is weird mostly because of that whole Rev. Wright (Christian) controversy during Obama's campaign. I guess the real answer is "Obama's religion is whatever FOX decides it is at the time."

[Initech]

6. Wow, I'm surprised to hear it come directly from the horse's ass... er mouth.

[Curmudgeoness]

8. Sorry this was as I suspected. I, too, have this fantasy.

And I also believe that this is how he really feels.

[EstimatedProphet]

10. You had me going for a while!

I was certain it was satire, but then I really wondered when I couldn't fine a link to The Onion whether there was something to it. Then I saw your screenname. Well done!

[SpiralHawk]

11. "There's a sucker* born every 3 1/2 seconds. Smirk." - Rush DraftDodger Limbaugh (R)

* aka RepubliFreepBagger

[Qutzupalotl]

12. The Lounge is your friend.

[Kurovski]

13. "Hide Thread" might be yours.

It's to the left at the end of every OP.

[Qutzupalotl]

15. I know about that. I wanted to make sure the OP knew

that we have a whole forum where satire is loved, appreciated and expected, and where DUers are not likely to be misinformed.

If I'd simply hidden the thread, I couldn't have gotten that message to him.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

16. I didn't know...

I'll check it out... thanks.

In the meantime, sorry for not clearly labeling this as satire today.

-- in my own defense, however, I must say that even when I've done that, people miss it and still get upset. And if they are reading carefully enough to not miss it, I think there's usually plenty in there to at least hint that it's not a 'traditional' news item. For example, in this one:

- the Porcine Pill Popper, believing his listeners were hearing a sixty second commercial from one of his biggest sponsors — an online Mexican pharmacy —

- "After all, how else could one explain the fact that Limbaugh’s audience is 3 1/2 times as large as any radio host who makes sense."

- Conversely, 34% of Republicans and 92% of Democrats responded that they believe he is a major douchebag.

- the Bard of Bombast was not available for comment because he was in a music studio recording a duet version of ‘Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word’ with Elton John.

- 'Hooked-on-Phonics’, a longtime sponsor, "... we are confident, as has been our experience, that those who have use for our products and services will remain loyal to the program".

- ('Hooked-on-Phonics’)company spokesman Chaim Eyjafjallajokull (pronounced HI-yum)

Considering the whole piece is just over 400 words, I would hope this should be enough to avoid any confusion as to the 'seriousness' of the content...

[Kurovski]

19. I can see how some might have been thrown by the OP,

but it wasn't posted in editorials and Articles.

The first listing on Google for describing all of DU reads as follows: "Providing political satire and commentary for Democrats..."

http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&aq=t&ie=UTF-8&rls=RNWE,RNWE:2004-35,RNWE:en&q=DEMocratic+underground

I think it's pretty fair satire, and worthy of GD. If it were not, it would have been moved hours ago.

[yurbud]

14. this should clearly be labeled as satire here--but not when you send it to your conservative relativ

[formercia]

17. You have to be ignorant to be a 'Conservative.'

as well as selfish, myopic, xenophobic and any number of other psychopathic tendencies.

[Kurovski]

20. In the words of one of our finer Representatives...

"Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Liar"

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

21. Or, as Al Franken titled his book, "A Big Fat Idiot"...

and thanks for your comment.

My friend 'Grantcart' was the one who first suggested that I post on DU.

I believe he posts his satire in GD, and don't recall seeing too many complaints about it...

I will, however, endeavor to always label as such since DU doesn't provide a vehicle for 'tags'.

At least then, when some are "taken in" (which happens startlingly often even when the first line of the body text reads "SATIRE"), it will be harder to justify directing their anger at the author. My purpose is to entertain and incite thought -- not to incite readers...

[Kurovski]

22. Oops.

I meant Franken's line to read "idiot". So much for the grand sweep I was going for.


Maybe just patch the little "satire" emoticon on at the end when you're parodying a news outlet. I thought it was already clear, but sometimes folks are reading fast through a number of posts.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

23. I'm not so familiar with

emoticons, but that's a great suggestion -- I'll be sure to look it up.

What do you think about putting it at the top -- before the text? I've tried to indicate there in the past assuming that if the reader wasn't interested in satire it would save them the trouble (and time) of continuing...

[Kurovski]

24. It's bright red and is easily seen at the bottom of a post

providing the post is not too long. Here it is:

:sarcasm:

I think it's less intrusive at the end. You don't want to completely destroy suspension of disbelief right out of the gate.

Emoticons are in message Options under Smilies lookup table, which is in blue on the page you are composing your message.

you type "colon" "sarcasm" "colon". (no quote marks, of course.)

I hope this is making sense.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

26. thanks again - constructive criticism as well as

assistance being a 'better citizen' in the community is always appreciated.

[Kurovski]

32. I personally dislike the emoticon, but it appears it can save you some grief.

I'd still leave it out. :evilgrin:

Anyway, I loved the piece.

[Zambero]

25. Should be "Hooked on Phonies"

...whenever deliberate fabrication in order to placate ignorant listeners becomes a business model. Limbaugh has outright contempt for his audience of sheep, albeit only in private.

[SpiralHawk]

33. LOL

LOL

[Control-Z]

27. The Onion?

Edit after reading thread: You wrote it. Nice job mixing fact with fiction.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

30. Thanks, I consider that that the highest compliment! n/t

[Gamey]

29. Nice "experiment"

Visit his website but don't take it too seriously.

[LiberalAndProud]

31. I'm often duped by your OPs, until I read your username.

...


you have me pining for what ought to be


...


Well done.

[Cal33]

35. Dems. should do their best to use this opportunity to get ahold

of it (surely some Democrat must have a video of this), and then
broadcast it 7/24 for months, if not years, on end.

I hope this opportunity won't be wasted!