Treating others with civility & how does the rec and un-rec function work

[Mimosa]

I've been here on D.U. since early 2003. D.U. can be intimidating for shy people. It's seldom I have initiated a topic. I tend to participate by reading, and occasionally replying to topics and the posts of others. I try to be positive and encouraging.

It's hard to launch a topic and hope people will at least try to discuss what one is caring about. In particular I've been feeling devastated about the disaster for the Gulf Coast, the ocean, creatures and the people who live there. So I've been stressed out even more than I was during Katrina because i think this disaster is far, far worse and the harm will be long lasting. And yes, I'm embittered about the federal government not telling us all the facts. It's obvious they are withholding facts.

I'm unhappy about the health care bill which will benefit the big corporations and the insurance companies but will do nothing to reduce mine and my partners increasingly unbearable costs for insufficient health insurance which won't cover us should we get severely ill and require expensive treatments.

I don't see any positive changes in Afghanistan. People are still dying and being wounded there.


Anyhow, I posted a topic to ask for disussion and a couple of grinches rudely attacked me, couldn't even give me a break for venturing to post a topic. One person was trying to twist everything I'd written. Some were unrecommending in a rude way. I don't do things like that. I usually recommend every topic which is intriguing and thought-provoking. I can hardly recall un-reccing, although I may have if the topic seemed to be flamebaiting.. So, what happens with the un-rec? If one person recommends, and another un-recommends, does the latter cancel out the former?

[Swamp Rat]

1. We are a wounded nation

:hug:

[proud2BlibKansan]

2. Yes the unrecs cancel the recs

Thanks for a thoughtful OP. Wish I had seen the thread you mention.

[Electric Monk]

7. I think this is the thread they're talking about

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=389&topic_id=8634700&mesg_id=8634700

[SharonAnn]

3. Thank you for contributing to a civil discussion. You've explained well

what is of concern to you and it is posts like yours that encourage me to read DU postings.

There's enough "un-civil" discourse in the world, especially the media and the blogosphere, and I hunger for more civil debate.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

4. I think you're correct about the un-rec.

I think they do cancel out the rec.

Now, if someone comes after you in an inappropriate way, feel free to hit the alert button. Let the moderators sort it out...

That's what I do. I prefer to stay out of any discussion like that. If I have the facts to counter such a person, I post them.

You have a right to post any topic you want!

Don't let the grinches, or the bastards, get you down!

Recommended.

:hi:

[monmouth]

5. You write a good OP. Keep on posting..K&R...nt

[Catherina]

6. You mean this thread? For what it's worth, I rec'd it.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x8634700


I hate to say this but the ignore button is your best friend right now. I've been using it liberally and it makes for a much more pleasant, cooperative and informational experience.

There's no law that says you need to give your attention to immature posters.

If one recs and another unrecs, that evens it out to 0.

[lumberjack_jeff]

11. The literal answer to the question posed in that thread is yes.

It would have been against the rules.

There are probably lots of agitprop websites out there run by anarchists in which it wouldn't be.

DU isn't going to be everything to all people. It is intended to promote progressives in the democratic party within the current electoral system. It isn't a place for people seeking violent overthrow.

I didn't recommend or unrecommend your post, but if you're too shy to write an OP, then I suggest that maybe you start with less divisive topics than taking DU to task for being unsupportive of the idea of insurrection.

[Catherina]

20. I have no idea what you're talking about LJ. What post? What OP? Me shy?

:shrug:

[lumberjack_jeff]

22. Crap. Sorry.

Intended for the op.

I don't know what my problem is today.

[Catherina]

27. No worries.

I kind of thought so afterwards.

It's not an easy time for any of us. No worries LJ.

[lumberjack_jeff]

21. self delete

[RKP5637]

8. I just read your post, gave it a + rec and also think it made a lot of sense! n/t

[Cant trust em]

9. I don't mind unreccing for the right reasons.

I'm opposed to doing it anonymously, so when I unrec I always post why I did it (flamebaiting, unsubstantiated opinion, etc.)

[Fumesucker]

10. That's just the nature of online discourse..

For one thing there are no verbal or visual cues online, just words on a screen, it's easy to take things in a manner that they weren't intended..

Secondly, I've found that brevity is not only the soul of wit but also of communication too, any paragraph longer than a couple or three sentences at the outside is almost guaranteed to be misconstrued by someone, usually in as unhelpful a manner as possible.

Posting to an online political forum is not for the faint of heart or for those easily offended, there are easily dozens of subjects that are 100% certain to start a flame war and it's not always obvious to the uninitiated what those subjects might be.

Just keep on keeping on and try not to take the negative feedback personally, easier said than done I know but it does become less stressful with practice.

[Mimosa]

13. Fumesucker, I know. I've been online since the early 1990s

Things seem more ferocious lately. People on D.U. seem willing to take offense easily and sometimes become overtly hostile more than they used to.If that weren't true the admins wouldn't have tweaked the guidelines and asked mods to become more pro-active. ;)

I co-admin a multi-interest board and have for 5 years so I'm sort of experienced. My skin isn't very thin.

I just wonder where we're all headed as well as how much compromise we at the bottom have to accept.

[Fumesucker]

19. There is a great deal more friction on DU than there was a couple of years ago..

It's easier to be the party out of power than it is to be the party in power, getting into power has exposed all the stress fractures within the Democratic party, such a big tent is bound to have factions that don't see eye to eye and the factionalism is clearly getting more intense by the day.

People are stressed too, that rarely brings out the best in humans and for many of us watching a party that is supposedly on our side do things that feel very much like a stab in the back is extremely painful and a lot of us lash out in anger when we are hurting.

I forget who it was that said "Politics ain't beanbag", but they were absolutely correct.

[LaurenG]

12. Try saying you feel bad for the seniors having their dividends cut

It'll knock your socks off. :wow:

There are some know-it-all people who are heartless and would prefer to make something out of simple statements and even when proven wrong they will not back down.

You know what you meant and if they don't want to take you at your word then I suggest you place them on ignore. I did and my experience is much nicer now.

[Mimosa]

15. Oh, lord, I do feel bad for seniors. In a few years I'll be one...

and I have no dividends. :(

I feel sorry for the seniors who will bear some of the brunt of the healthcare 'reform' whose providers will pass on cuts. One of my friend's mother lives on S.S. and she only gets $11,000 a year and I wonder how I could make do on that since I don't have a paid for house.

[LaurenG]

18. Lots of bad things are happening and people sometimes

make bad decisions that seemed right at the time.
I feel sad about so many things right now.

[MineralMan]

26. I'm on Social Security and get the same amount.

I also now get Medicare and, with the supplement, that costs me just $200/month, and I'll have no copays or deductibles. I was paying $750/month until now. I work part time at my chosen profession to earn the maximum I'm allowed until I'm 66. Then, I'll work more and recover my former income.

My wife, who is 11 years younger, also works, and our house is paid for.

Start working toward paying off a home, if you can. It's the very best thing you can do, by far. If your home is more than you need, sell it and buy your retirement home now, so it will be paid off before you retire.

That's my advice.

[apocalypsehow]

14. Just curious, but how does one go about "unrecommending in a rude way"?

:shrug:

Oh, and I read the other OP: kitchens, stoves that are too hot, pithy Harry Truman sayings, all of that.

[Mimosa]

16. Just nasty remarks from the people who did it

And purposed twisting of what I was trying to say, which was to praise of the Founders, who were radicals and revolutionaries.

[MineralMan]

24. Disagreeing with you is not "twisting." It is simply disagreeing.

Again, the thread you mention is still open. You can defend yourself there.

[MineralMan]

25. Apparently, disagreement in any form is "rude."

Odd, that.

[mzmolly]

17. I believe it's false to assert that the health care bill not help average

Americans like yourself. I'd like to know what you base that assertion on. In other words, what information did you take into consideration before coming to the conclusion you did?

Yes and "un-rec" cancels out the former.

[MineralMan]

23. Why are you starting another thread? Your other thread is still

active. People who disagree with you are now "grinches?"

[Uzybone]

28. unreccing

why start a thread to complain about another thread?