Fight erupts in church over "Touchdown Jesus"

[theHandpuppet]

From the Cincinnati Enquirer
http://news.cincinnati.com/article/20100617/NEWS01/6180319/Protesters-Giant-Jesus-a-graven-image-

Protesters: Jesus statue a 'graven image'
By Janice Morse • [e-mail] • June 17, 2010

MONROE - Controversy over plans to rebuild the giant Jesus sculpture at Solid Rock Church sparked a disturbance - and an assault allegation - during Wednesday night's sermon.

Brandon M. Ushry, 23, of Springfield Township, told police that a church member assaulted him while he and a friend, Andrew R. Braden, 27, of Greenhills, were at the church "to protest the 'worship of a graven image,' in reference to the recent Jesus statue fire," a police report says.

The 62-foot-tall "King of Kings" statue was struck by lightning, then burned during a storm Monday. The church has announced plans to rebuild a bigger, better, fireproof Jesus statue by year's end.

Ushry "stated that he and Andrew began to publicly protest during the sermon and were advised to leave by Church security," the report says. As Ushry and Braden were being escorted out of the church, Ushry told police that a church member grabbed him, shoved him and threatened to beat him.... MORE

[grantcart]

1. People say God doesn't have a sense of humor.

[theHandpuppet]

2. Apparently they didn't get the message the first time

As if lightning wasn't enough!

[pinboy3niner]

4. If Touchdown Jesus didn't prove it, Fireproof Jesus sure the hell will

:rofl:

[hobbit709]

7. A truly warped sense of humor at that.

[Hubert Flottz]

10. They might say it but they don't mean it...

Andy is a funny guy.

[opihimoimoi]

18. Hey Hubert....nobody told us Jesus was into the NFL...prolly watched the Super Bowl...Holy Crab shit

this is nuts...

Damn... they don't even to their own Bibical instructions....No Fucking Images....WTF?

[Hubert Flottz]

22. I think he was really tailgating at the last supper.

Here's a song about it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SO5Y1OuQIxo

[RamboLiberal]

16. Yep - the porn store across the street wasn't struck n/t

[rpannier]

52. God missed???

:shrug:

[eridani]

50. And they say he's not an art critic either n/t

[Chulanowa]

3. "A bigger, better, fireproof Jesus statue"

Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first asbestos Messiah. Touchdown Jesus will be that Messiah. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, less flammable.

:rofl:

[BrklynLiberal]

11. LOL. How many people you figure that church could feed with the $$ it will cost to rebuild.

They should all go watch "Dogma"

[OnionPatch]

57. Feeding the hungry?! What does that have to do with Jesus??

:sarcasm:

[JHB]

48. That's why God makes tornadoes...

What part of "blue bolts from the heavens" did they not understand?

[Hubert Flottz]

5. Drug Test TDJ, ASAP!

This sh!t is not good for the league or the fans.

Edit...I think what the owners of TDJ are trying to say is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLwtqwnI6ko

[opihimoimoi]

21. George does Who is on First

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfwRb_XKFvA&feature=related

[Hubert Flottz]

31. LOL

Sounds about right.

[teknomanzer]

6. Who did not see this coming?

Religion would be hilarious if it weren't for all the suffering it causes.

[Raster]

8. 2. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image.

[Solly Mack]

9. "Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology."

[BlueJazz]

19. LOL!...Good one!

[Ignis]

26. ...

:spray:

[saltpoint]

12. Wur gonna servav this here tral of FAR, brothers and sisters.

[arcane1]

13. Hilariously ignorant of their own 10 commandments

I love it :D

[theothersnippywshrub]

42. Probably hoping that God grades on a curve. n/t

[gratuitous]

14. It's not clear from the story

But apparently these two got up in the middle of the Wednesday night worship service to "publicly protest." It's not clear if they are members at Solid Rock or not, but I know how my congregation would respond to non-members looking to order our affairs.

We'd listen politely until they got done yapping, and then feel free to ignore them. There might be a "thanks for your concern" from either the pulpit or one of the members, but that's about it. I don't think we'd grab anyone or shove them or escort them out of the service. Someone might invite them to talk privately outside the sanctuary so as not to disrupt the proceedings that everyone else was there to observe and participate in.

Boors will be boors, and publicly affirming congregations have gotten used to them.

[madinmaryland]

15. You know, the $700,000 to rebuild the statue would feed a LOT of hungry

people.

Uhhh. Nevermind, that is a different type of Christianity, that does not worship the almight dollar.

[Ian David]

27. Their idea of feeding hungry people is a "free prayer breakfast."

Where you have to listen to their marketing spiel if you want to eat.

I would rather they rebuild the Giant Jesus than spend their money trying to take away peoples' rights with things like Prop 8 and shit.

[Ian David]

35. They should build THIS...

[JitterbugPerfume]

41. According to Limbaugh

hungry kids can find food in dumpsters, leaving more money to build statues that piss people off.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

17. Facebook group has over 5,700 people now.

People telling them to use that money to help people, not rebuild TDJ.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Petition-to-Solid-Rock-DO-NOT-REBUILD-Help-people-with-that-money-instead/131673323517334?v=wall#!/pages/Petition-to-Solid-Rock-DO-NOT-REBUILD-Help-people-with-that-money-instead/131673323517334?v=wall

[lumberjack_jeff]

20. I have a new favorite phrase: "a bigger, better, fireproof Jesus statue" n/t

[Ian David]

29. Not even god himself can destroy our new Jesus! n/t

[RagAss]

23. Pitiful, delusional Assclowns !

[Gold Metal Flake]

24. Why don't they just make a big golden calf?

Same diff.

[JoeyT]

44. Last time they tried that they were pretty soundly mocked for it.

http://wonkette.com/403920/jesus-people-pray-that-false-idol-will-save-gods-economy
This was quite a while back, but roughly the same. Falling afoul of the whole "Graven images" thing, only that time they used the specific example the bible gives.

[Ian David]

25. See also: chrisTians of Little Faith to Defy Act of god, will Rebuild Fireproof Version...

chrisTians of Little Faith to Defy Act of god, will Rebuild Fireproof Version of Giant Butter Jesus
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=214&topic_id=250990&mesg_id=250990

[Release The Hounds]

28. The church has security guards?

[Ian David]

30. Of course. Their church is a big building full of money and crazy people. n/t

[AsahinaKimi]

32. Amazing...

"and were advised to leave by Church security"


Wow.. Church Security. Who are they threatened by? Non Christians?

[Ohio Joe]

33. "a bigger, better, fireproof Jesus statue"

Priceless :rofl:

[Dappleganger]

36. That statement alone was worth the read!

But why are they leaving out the bigger, better fireproof Buddha??

[Bluebear]

38. Yeah! That's the ticket!

:rofl:

[Posteritatis]

62. What can one *possibly* add to the discussion after a line like that? (nt)

[KonaKane]

34. So Katrina was God's punishment on pro-choicers, but lightning striking the touchdown Jesus

was just a "fluke of nature" which will be corrected by building a bigger better fireproof Jesus?

Oy.

[AnArmyVeteran]

37. They are worshipping false gods, violating a Commandment

I find most Christians to be the worst violators of the Ten Commandments. They worship all kinds of material structures. They spend millions of gaudy buildings and 300 foot high crosses. Why are they so materialistic? Shouldn't they be focused on that what is unseen instead of going into a stupor when they see man-made structures that have nothing to do with god or faith?

They wasted $300,000 on the Jesus statue when that money could have gone to the poor. It could have been used to feed and cloth. I wonder, what if Jesus stood on the Mount and built a huge structure of himself and let all of those thousands of people starve to death? What get me is all the waste in churches. In my town new churches keep going up everywhere, but the existing churches barely have any cars in front of them on Sundays. Why are they building new churches when they can't even fill up the ones they have? And why don't churches join together and share the same buildings and just stagger their service times?

Better still, there are 2000 different christian churches in the US alone. Why??? It seems no two Christians can agree on everything in the Bible. If God was 'perfect' don't you think he could have written a book that would have one simple message without all of the coded stories and fables? If simplicity is genius, then god is a blooming idiot. Too bad god didn't wait until at least the printing press was invented, or better still, when film or video were invented. It seems all too suspicious that a god that is all-knowing and 'always was and always will be' would pick such a primitive time in human history to supposedly send his son to be murdered, without even having any reliable documentation of the event.

I probably know more about the Bible than 95% of Christians. Most right wing Christians don't even read it. They just listen to their preachers and or watch Glenn Beck. I like to give Christians tests like ask them to repeat the Ten Commandments. So far I haven't found one who got all ten right. Try it yourself. It's so easy to short-circuit a Christian's brain.

Perhaps they should read the part of the Bible that says 'take the log out of your own eye before trying to remove the splinter out of another's'. From all the people I have known in my life I have found that the ones who are the most fundamentalist Christians are also the ones who are the biggest hypocrites.

Oh yeah, Amen, and amen...

[Ian David]

39. FIREPROOF JESUS!

[Barack_America]

43. The flame retardant savior.

[callous taoboy]

56. Fireproof Jesus and the Gated Disciples

[Initech]

40. "Fireproof Jesus" would make a great name for a rock band.

[mindwalker_i]

49. Rock on dude!`

[HarveyDarkey]

45. Heywood Banks just updated Big Butter Jesus

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSa8OHtjXW8

[Barack_America]

58. Hah! Brilliant.

[BrklynLiberal]

60. A very, very funny man

[SalmonChantedEvening]

46. If you build it, they will fight.

:D

[treestar]

47. What a waste of money the whole thing is

:rofl:

[rpannier]

51. Fire Proof???

If God wants to burn it down, God will burn it down

Unless, of course, you believe in that mumbo-jumbo about electron particles in the air that come together and make contact with those make believe positive particles and lightning is created.
Then you'd need to fire proof it

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

53. A flag on the play

Foul called on Braden and Ushry.

It's the church's field, they should have whatever mascot image they want.

Five yard penalty.

Go T.D. Jesus!

:hi:

[old mark]

54. If only he would have been green instead of yellow, the Eagles would have won the Super Bowl

that time....


mark

[kgnu_fan]

55. I thought Jesus himself was against idol worshipping....

[BR_Parkway]

59. "church security" - now doesn't that just sum it all up? It's not a church

it's a business.

[JBoy]

61. Personal foul, unecessary roughness. 15 yard penalty. 2nd and 25.