I just sent an unkind email to my mother

[tyedyeto]

She forwards all kinds of crap, right wing talking points from O'Lielly, Limpballs, etc to me.

I have always just deleted them but tonight I had enough and asked her to stop sending me this shit.

My mom is in her late 70's, always been a Republican and bought into the whole Limpballs scene during the 90's. If you asked her about many social positions (ie: abortion, death penalty, etc) she would be on the left. But this hate radio she listens to has colored her thinking in many other areas.

So, tonight I politely (I hope) told her to never send me any more right wing Bull Shit emails.

We live in the same town and I honestly hope she doesn't take this as an affront to her beliefs. I just had to finally stand up instead of just deleting the offending emails.

Thanks for listening

Tye

[EFerrari]

1. That must have been hard.

[tyedyeto]

8. It was very hard for me to stand up for what I believe

She's always known I've been a Democrat since high school (many, many moons ago), but since she went online... the stuff she sends me, I shudder over but have always just hit that good old 'delete' button.

For some reason, tonight, I just couldn't and asked her to never send me stuff like that again.

In a way I feel guilty but in another I feel relief. Make sense?

[EFerrari]

10. Perfect sense. And now, she gets to know you better.

[upi402]

2. That's a tough call but I don't blame ya at all

I have a "FILL TO HERE" line that gets breached from time to time. Maybe follow up with a ready apology cuz righties cannot stand criticizm generaly. She's your mom so she'll still love ya I bet.

[tyedyeto]

12. I know she'll still love me

and even though I've been a Democrat since high school and am now in my 50's and have argued with her over the years about politics, since she went online I seem to be getting more right wing shit from her and tonight just hit me the wrong way.

I know this won't be the end of any sort of relationship with her, I just had to 'vent' about it.

Thanks for listening.

[proud patriot]

3. assertive doesn't necessarily mean unkind

:shrug:

[Merlot]

4. An affront to her beliefs...but what about your beliefs?

You're not a child, you're an adult and can think for yourself. She needs to respect you too.

So be polite, don't debate her, and you've done the right thing.

Best!

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

5. When mom was alive and in bed...

She always had Faux on. I never discussed this with her. She was old, a life-long Republican, from the south...Just wasn't a fight worth having. One day, she looked at me, pointed at the TV and just WENT OFF on Bush. This was well before I even had the feelings I do now.

Mom knew. She said so, too.

[FoxNewsSucks]

6. Whenever I got that crap from people I know

No matter how well or how casually we know each other, I debunk the rightwing garbage and "reply to all" so the rebuttal goes to everyone the lies were originally sent to.

Very quickly, I get NO MORE from that person. Either because they see the light (unlikely) or because they know I'll do it and so they don't send it to me.

Way more fun than just deleting the crap. :evilgrin:

[Cha]

19. Good on you!~

:thumbsup: :thumbsup:

[tyedyeto]

22. Some of the shit she sends is not worth de-bunking

it's just shit. I normally just hit delete. If it continues after today, I may start replying with any and all rebuttals I can find.

Thanks

[tyedyeto]

23. Dupe. n/t

[ray of light]

26. Thyat's what I do. lol. A few replied back and then I did too...Then they

reply back, "take me off your list..."

Of course once in a while one will just come back, "Take me off your list" and I'll say, "But you're not on my email list. I have no idea how you got this. I must have hit reply all instead of just reply."

Usually, it shuts them up. And it took a while for them to learn that I will reply. Now they have stopped sending me those yicky forwards.

[syberyenta]

7. Apologize

For your ill-tempered email, unless this is how your relationship is, and how you want your relationship to be. (Which, judging by your post, you do not.)

Mother's Day is this weekend.

You might invite her out to discuss 'Everything but our politics, on which I think we must agree to disagree.'

[EFerrari]

11. I wonder why someone should apologize for being politely truthful.

[proud2BlibKansan]

15. For telling the truth?

[orleans]

9. if you said it politely then it probably was not an unkind email

my mom was buying into him too in the 90's (and watching fox even in the early 2000s). she is not a republican. she is a dem.

we probably had a "long talk" about this and when she continued to have the radio on w/rush i'd turn it off and ask her what the hell she was listening to this asshole for? it was a bit of a battle, maybe i wore her down, maybe she grew tired of fox & rush, but at last the habit was broken.

we talked for hours about politics/the world/crap but she's totally on the left side of the page with me. maybe she just needed someone to challenge all the bullshit she was being fed.

she listens to randi rhodes and mike malloy. the news channel never goes on fox (cnn & msnbc). she adores olbermann

have some conversations with your mom, explain & debunk things for her. help her to understand. explain to her why all those emails bother/upset you because of what you believe, and tell her why you believe it.

show her the way you think, explain it, draw her a heartfelt picture. it's never too late to grow & change & open your mind.

[mvd]

13. Good for you

Is she still buying the lies on the war?

[MODemocrat]

14. I feel it's presumptious to forward this crap

Some of my friends continue to send me this kind of crap, and I tell them in a nice way that I'd rather not be on their mailing lists. However, nothing stops them; so everything I get now is immediately sent to the trash bin, un-opened.

These same people probably wouldn't be pleased if we sent them the reverse. Down with them. I know it's
hard to say anything to one's own Mother, yet, they are being presumptious for sending it in the first place.:argh: :boring:

[tyedyeto]

20. That is what I have always done.... delete key is a wonderful feature.

But for some reason, tonight I had enough. Told her to never send me anything that condems a Democrat or a Democratic point of view ever again.

I guess my whole point in this is to verify that I should not be feeling guilty..... but she's my Mom.

Thanks for the insight.

[Straight Shooter]

16. Tell her if she doesn't stop sending those mails, you'll call her up each time ...

... and start singing, "It's A Small World After All."

I know it's cruel, but it will probably get her to stop. :P

[illinoisprogressive]

17. For awhile my leftist mom was watching Fox until she figured out they were gop leaning

but, you could see some of the effects for awhile. then she says, I think that Fox News is for the gop.
No shit, mom.

[Cha]

18. Yeah, I know how hard

it is to ask someone who you love but don't agree with to stop with the emails full of their beliefs.

I hope she respects your wishes and you can hang out without bringing up the big elephant in the room.

[Ferret Annica]

21. My Mom died not wanting me in near her death bed

because of my political activism. I nearly died being pulled from a tree by a security guard falling three stories to the pavement and made the front page locally twice and all the TV stations.

I have been on the TV and in the papers locally for several other urban tree protection actions and she was convinced I did them all to get her.

Apologize for the tone, explain your aggravation, but don't back down, you have nothing to be ashamed of.

Sunday is my 53rd Birthday and Mother's day. I envy you some because your Mom is alive and life always means hope. I understand excruciatingly what your frustration is. I wish I still had such a degree of hope for some reconciliation with my Mom.

Love her unconditionally where unconditional love is called for. Help her as much as you can in her later years.

I would have loved to have some reconciliation with Mom before she died, but she didn't want it and ultimately most of the blame is on her.

But I would have sat by this emaciated and sickly woman dying of cancer and let her spout off all the venom she wanted to because at that point there is no use in fighting. I actually would have been comforted at her getting that off her chest, wrong as the diatribe would have been.

I don't miss the frustration and aggravation, but I miss her face, her voice, and watching her feed the racoons at her back door at night.

And I will always feel pain because there was no reconciliation.

You are at your prime, or far closer to it, she is at the sunset of her life, give a little bit. It's harder for her to achieve a reasoned and balanced perspective on things, which is why she mixed manipulation with sharing. Mind did that all the time too.

But never compromise your beliefs, passion, or self respect. You would do a dis-service to both you and her by doing so. Good luck.

[tyedyeto]

25. Thank you for some good advice.

I am hopeful this won't be any kind of huge break in our relationship.

We did some agreeing to disagree politically back in the Clinton years. But back then she never had any access to the chain letter type of emails she's been sending lately.

I've been passive about them the last couple of years, but no longer. I will stand up for what I believe.

Thanks for your support and encouragement.

[Ferret Annica]

28. Venting helped me too, thank you for your kind words of thanks

Good luck. Enjoy Mother's Day.

[riderinthestorm]

27. I can relate to this. My mother is a die-hard Rethug

and she cannot tolerate my activism or my politics or my choices in life. I call her on Sundays for a short and brief Sunday conversation knowing that there will never be a reconciliation before she dies.

We are just too different.

Sometimes you just have to let it go. The gap is just too wide. There's that old saw about families, blood, and not blood and all.... Please know that sometimes those that are closest to you won't be related.

:hug:

[orleans]

24. someone (postman?) posted a thread saying this is a great site

for debunking fox crap. take your mom there.

http://mediamatters.org/index

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

29. Good luck.. please keep us posted whatever happens, if you don't mind.

[TlalocW]

30. I get sent shit like this from my mom all the time

But she sends it to me to debunk it. Most of it comes from her ultra-conservative brother or my ultra-conservative niece, and I'm more than happy to reply all and tell them exactly how they're wrong. :)

TlalocW

[northofdenali]

31. I thank the goddess I've never had to disagree with my mom on politics.

She's 92, and 100% pure yellow-dog Democrat, and has always been.

Lots of disagreement on other stuff, but never that.

I hope you'll stay close - it's worth the aggravation, I promise.

[TankLV]

32. That's so sad - I miss my mom - and dad...

She's 70 and NOW you decide to challenge her...

You know your situation best I guess...

I hope things work out for you...

There will be a time when she is gone and if you ever loved her, you may regret this.

If you've put up with it in the past for all these years, ...

Only you know what works for you - every choice has consequences...

[bliss_eternal]

33. Interesting...

...you tell the op that they know best, then you seem to do your best to guilt trip them about their choice. If you were as supportive as you claim in your post, I doubt you would make the effort to put out all these "double messages."