My son had a rude awakening with a "friend"..

[SoCalDem]

This is a guy he's known since his early years in soccer, from age 5 -up..all though high school.. He was IN the guy's wedding..

anyway..

they went to a wine tasting with this couple and 4 other couples (they had a limo..so no DUIs :)..).. My son and his wife & this other couple were the last ones to be dropped off, and on the ride to the couple's house, the guy said to my son.."I need to ask you something".. and then he dropped the lead balloon.. He asked my son to please call his congressman ( it's a woman and the guy should have known..but I digress), and tell him (her) to STOP the health care bill". My son asked him why on earth anyone with a conscience and a brain would want to do that. and the guy said .."It's about "preserving your freedom".. My son knew the guy was quite tipsy, but had to ask him.. "WHAT FREEDOM?..freedom to get sick and die without health care? and just what is your definition of freedom?".

It's a real sore spot with our son, since he was uninsured for THREE long years. he had major back surgery and 4 months later lost his insurance, so he could not afford the expensive follow up treatments he needed.. we helped him out for a while, but he finally just did the rehab himself.

He got insurance a few months ago through his job (1 year waiting period), and his ortho doc said ."Where ya been?".

the sad thing is that even though the guy was drunk, my son no longer thinks the same way about him, because he showed his selfish/stupid side..

[la_chupa]

1. that's tough

I have some friends that I can only stay friends with by not bringing up certain topics.

Its much more relaxing to hang out with like minded people though.

[rurallib]

2. Life ain't long enough to put up with that kind of crap.

[SoCalDem]

8. It really surprised him that the guy just came out with it..out of the blue

they had been talking about football & basketball, and then the inner-Limbaugh came out of the guy :)

I think they will stay friends, but it won;t be the same..

I had a friend (or so I thought) who ruined it by being callous when my cat died. I was crying and she said "They have lots of kittens at the pound, why don't you just go get one that looks like her?"

[rurallib]

3. Life ain't long enough to put up with that kind of crap.

[monmouth]

4. Similar story here, not about HCR but racism. I've been friends with

a couple (I was in their wedding) and she and I have been friends since age 14. Her husb. started to send some nasty racist cartoons, e-mails, etc. and I called him out on it. I was really surprised and told him so. You know people for all of those years and finally get to really "know" them. Anyway, I told him I was embarrassed for him. Haven't received any more correspondence at all from him, guess I'm off his e-mail list. I'm a little hurt but this RW crowd that used to be my friends can kiss my a$$ if you know what I mean. Good for your son, a real eye-opener for sure.

[Dreamer Tatum]

5. This sort of thing has happened to me several times.

Once while we were at urinals in a public bathroom a friend asked me to write to Reagan about acid rain. Also, as my bride was being walked up the aisle by her father, my best man whispered that he wanted me to call my senator about the whole Rev. Moon thing. Then, about three months ago, I was skydiving with a RW friend of mine who waited until we were free-falling to hand signal that I should go with him to a Town Hall so I could hold the extra clips for his AK47. It's incredible the lengths these wingers will go to, just incredible, I tell ya.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

23. skydiving -- hand signal that I should go with him to a Town Hall

so I could hold the extra clips for his AK47.

......

WHA????

are you joking?????

That's alot to say with signals while plummeting toward possible death!

[Romulox]

6. Politics isn't war. Maybe your son should engage his friend in conversation?

:shrug:

[SoCalDem]

11. um.. they have been "conversing" for 25 years

and being in each others' weddings & going on vacations together :)
Knowing my son, he'll give the guy another chance, but if he keeps at it with the politics, he'll cut him loose for a while... you cannot change these people's minds..they have to arrive at a change on their own.

[T Wolf]

16. It is IMPOSSIBLE to change the "mind" of cretins on the other side - and a complete waste

of time. All that happens is (1) you get frustrated and hurt and (2) you are subjected to even more of their filth.

Maybe it used to be possible to disagree with opponents on the other side, but they]/b] have escalated all political discussion to the level of war and if we continue to try and deal with them using a decades-old mindset, we lose.

You may like having racist, sexist, heartless assholes for friends, but many of us realize that life IS too short to waste on them.

[Romulox]

27. It's not your job (or right) to change people's minds. Just engaging people can be productive

if it can be kept civil...

"You may like having racist, sexist, heartless assholes for friends, but many of us realize that life IS too short to waste on them."

See, this is what I'm talking about. This is completely uncalled for and needlessly aggressive.

[ginnyinWI]

7. so much ignorance, so much mis-information

Take my dad, who will ONLY believe something if he hears it on FOX news--the only news he believes isn't controlled by the LIBERALS--those evil people. He believes that when "Obama-Pelosi-care" becomes law, we'll all have to be on waiting lists for things like elective surgery. He thinks our healthcare system is fine the way it is--as long as you don't look at the percent of the population that has none. I guess they can go eat cake.

He's got Medicare so what does he care. Government healthcare is fine for him but not for the uninsured. Does he not realize that when a lot more people get coverage, no matter how it is paid for, that the hospitals and clinics will only expand to take care of the demand?

[SoCalDem]

13. That was another thing he said.. "You'll have to WAIT for treatment"

My son said '' Y'mean like I had to wait NINE MONTHS for my back surgery with my insurance?"...:)

[sinkingfeeling]

18. Funny, I have pretty good employer (state) provided insurance and I will complete my 6 weeks wait

to see a maxillofacial surgeon on Dec. 4. I have exposed jaw bone due to radiation therapy, but couldn't even get an evaluation appointment until Dec.

[Arugula Latte]

9. Once you lose respect for someone's intelligence, it's hard to recover a positive view of them.

Too bad he's one of the loony tune idiots who think providing people with care so they don't die is the equivalent of putting them into a concentration camp and gassing them.

[Shagbark Hickory]

10. It used to be that you can have 'thuglican friends and debate topics but when it comes to healthcare

if someone opposes healthcare then it really is something else at that point.
There's absolutely no good reason to stand in the way of health reform unless you stand to lose profits or campaign contributions or pay higher taxes.

Unless this guy was a politician or worked in the health insurance industry, if he opposes health reform, he's just plain stupid and the truth serum brought that revealing fact to the surface.

[SoCalDem]

That's what was so weird about it.. they never talked pollitics

this was just out of the blue..like the guy was compelled to say it.. My son called it his "Inner-Limbaugh"..like on Alien..it just popped out:)

[Shagbark Hickory]

29. Well would your son be his friend if it was more obvious that he was stupid?

For example, if he told your son that he really has an IQ of 27, would your son still be his friend?

It might be like being friends with a druggie. You just come to expect them to be a certain way.

[LynneSin]

12. I would have told that 'friend' that I would call Congress

and insist they finish the damn healthcare bill and ignore the ignorance of those who oppose it.

[Wapsie B]

14. If the gop and blue dogs are so concerned about my freedom

then I sure hope they'll go to private insurers and give us that freedom. The way things stand now I have no freedom with healthcare. I am told that I must stay in network if that particular service is provided within the network or else shell out big $$ out of pocket. And all this is not taking into consideration all the cop-out clauses insurance companies have. What kind of freedom is that? Funny how repugs love to talk about freedom until someone actually wants some.

[The Backlash Cometh]

15. Give your son a hug for me.

The freedom to be as stupid as they wannabe. I would be all for it, if it only affected them.

[imdjh]

17. Meh, it all depends on whether you believe in true love or not.

And how you define "friend". Is your son's friend really a friend or is he a pal? It also hangs on the issue.

I have a dear old friend, going on 35 years now. I love and trust him and he loves and trusts me. He's currently suffering from a common form of social death known as marriage, it's being going on for years, but we stay in touch. A couple of years ago after a long time of no contact, we spoke on the phone and he had had a few. I was concerned that he had moved into Red territory and become one with them. Oddly, I couldn't remember us talking about politics in the past. So I gave him my 30 second version of my philosophy that the world could indeed be seen in black and white and that there was a logical answer to every issue (except abortion). He had had a couple of drinks, but was clear. "You can't say that." I was afraid he was about to say something that would forever change how i felt about him. "Some things, really are a matter of opinion." I felt like he had surrendered to mediocrity. In truth, he had gained a bit of wisdom that I have avoided and resist to this very day.

You're son's friend didn't say, "You know, you're a good Jew, but that doesn't mean that the rest of the Jews aren't out to destroy America." He said that he disagreed about health care. Some things are a matter of opinion.

[SoCalDem]

19. I had a friend who turned evangelical on me, and we reached an accomodation

I told her she was at the top of my list if I ever wanted to be saved..I'd call her first.. but not to ever preach to me.. but then I would ask her to ask Jesus for a close parking place from time to time:evilgrin:

we both held to our bargain..with one exception.. I had to quit letting my son go to Sunday school with her son when my son told me that "Craig talks in tongues..what's that, Mom".. Craig was 8..and also claimed to have seen jesus in his bathroom :)

From then on they were bike-riding buddies but not much more:)

[imdjh]

20. There are people with whom I have political agreement that I like less than those I don't.

Friendship is a form of love, it sometimes doesn't conform to "perfect match" status. Joan Rivers is allegedly a Republican and I'm pretty sure that I would rather spend time with her than Jeanine Garofolo.

[SoCalDem]

24. hah.. you can have both of them

:rofl:

I rarely ever talk politics with my buddies or friends..except to remind a few of them to vote..I'm not even sure how they vote,.,. it's not a thing" with us.

[Zywiec]

21. Doesn't sound like they were really friends

I've known people for a lot less time and would have known about their uninsured period. It would have been something we spoke about while we were together. I'm with my friends weekly.

And if my friends held against me all the stupid things I've said while having one too many, well again, they wouldn't really be my friend.

Sounds like two people that didn't spend a lot of time together or know much about each other.

[SoCalDem]

25. 25 years, of sports talk..guy talk

They were not "in each other's pocket", but lots of young people don't fixate on politics...they never did.

I doubt that our soon told all that many people he was not insured after his surgery.. he was not planning on asking them for a loan or for help with the bills, so it probably never came up..

He's also in the stage of his life where friend are marrying & having kids, so it's no longer the gang of guys hanging out as much as it used to be.. wives often frown on that sort of thing ..at least in the beginning:)

[dgibby]

22. I had 2 rude awakenings with friends re: politics.

The first one started sending me anti-Dem, Obama e-mails, but the final straw was when she sent me a racist rant by Pat Bucanhan. I called he on it in a very nice way, haven't heard from her since.

The second one happened with a VERY conservative (Beck, Limbaugh, Bill O., Hannity, Fox News, etc), VERY Catholic friend who accused me of being a baby murderer because I'm Pro Choice. My response: I can live with you calling me a baby murderer if you can live with me calling you a pedophile, or we could stop talking politics, etc, and save the friendship. We don't talk politics anymore, but I don't feel the same way about her anymore.

[SoCalDem]

26. Here's one for the record books that happened last week.

My friend who's Mexican & married to a black guy.. she shows me this "funny joke" on her phone.. first of all the damn phone is the size of a postage stamp, so I can;t even read it so she reads it to me.. I don't remember it all but it involved a pilot telling people they would have to be thrown off a plane alphabetically based on their ethnicity (:eyes: ), and it was about how the Mexicans & the black people on the plane kept changing what they wanted to be called to go further down the alphabet.. I was not amused, but they thought it was hi-lar-i-ous ..... go figure..

[izzybeans]

28. I've had an ongoing conversation with a guy I grew up with as well.

For his entire life he's been very liberal. Something has happened recently to turn him into an Objectivist Ayn Rand Cult worshiper. Literally. For an atheist I've had to talk him down from ritualistic heights with regard to "free markets". it's like its filling a spiritual void for him or something.

We have a date next spring for a camping trip to discuss readings of his and my choosing. He used to be one of the more critically incisive thinkers I knew. Now he recites programmatic statements from books that stand-in for poor philosophy and bad history.

We promise to get drunk and mean, and then kiss and make up afterward. And I made him promise not to blow up the tent should his feelings get hurt like Howard Roark Rand's hero in The Fountainhead.

My advice is to engage the friend in respectful conversation. There is no better ground to have these conversations than with someone you love and trust. It's scary to disagree but if anyone can reach his friend it is him.

[Mother Of Four]

31. Now THAT is a friend.

To quote you:
"We promise to get drunk and mean, and then kiss and make up afterward. And I made him promise not to blow up the tent should his feelings get hurt like Howard Roark Rand's hero in The Fountainhead."

:)

[Mother Of Four]

30. Friends aren't friends only because they believe everything you do...

People are friends with one another because you know you can pick up that phone day or night and say "I need you" and they'll be at your door soon as possible. They know that if they needed you, you would do the same thing.

Friends aren't a political affiliation, a religious affiliation, a financial class, or a regional thing.

In my experience, the better a friend is the more you can discuss differing views without fear or hurting the others feelings or dignity. Where a conversation is "Ok, you have a point..but have you thought of this?"

For instance, on the Health care issue. ALL of the people I consider friends agree that something needs to be done. However there are quite a few different views on HOW it should be done.

Should those people not be my friends because we don't agree on the how? I don't think so.

I think that the word "friend" is bantered about too easily these days. I personaly feel that a friend is someone you have a high regard for, a confidant, someone you trust and feel affection for.

Someone who your life would be much poorer without.

It's much stronger than a disagreement. :)

[MH1]

32. +1000

[HughBeaumont]

33. Huh huh, the "Suddenly Wingnut Friend" . .. FEAR IT!

I'm sure the Repukes say the same thing about me.

[Javaman]

34. A persons stupidity, sadly, can never be revealed slowly.

it's always a slap in the face.

I've had friends do the same thing to me. Go from being, what I thought, a rational thinking person to being a colossally stupid jackass in nothing flat.

[lostnfound]

35. Got email today, someone NEVER sends political stuff to call senator to vote against bill

We were disgusted to say the least. They must have a really active campaign going now to stop it.