Misbehaving children:

[Deja Q]

(poll)

[Shell Beau]

1. I think it depends on the situation.

[MercutioATC]

2. Context?

Obviously #1.

Are there more dimensions to this question?

[TexasObserver]

3. Discipline is always a good idea. It's corporal punishment that isn't.

[NYC_SKP]

11. Yep. People often mistake one for the other.

discipline

c.1225, from O.Fr. descepline, from L. disciplina "instruction given to a disciple," from discipulus (see disciple).

Sense of "treatment that corrects or punishes" is from notion of "order necessary for instruction."

The L. word is glossed in O.E. by þeodscipe. Meaning "branch of instruction or education" is first recorded c.1386.

Meaning "military training" is from 1489; that of "orderly conduct as a result of training" is from 1509.

The verb is attested from c.1300. Disciplinarian "one who enforces order" is first attested 1639; earlier used of Puritans who wanted to establish the Presbyterian "discipline" in England (c.1585).

[TexasObserver]

21. Yes. It takes discipline of one's emotions to use fair discipline with children.

The punishment should fit the crime, be immediate if possible, and be the kind of punishment that gives pause for thought by you and and the child.

Sometimes there is little choice but to be harsh. You can't reason with a two year who wants to run from the car in the parking lot as soon as their feet hit the ground. They have to be so alarmed at your reaction they will not likely do that again. I'm not saying to strike them, but if one seldom raises their voice to their kids, doing so has meaning.

The problem is many parents are unwilling to do what is required. If the child is misbehaving in public, pick them up, take them out, and deny them whatever it is they were wanting. You have to be willing to outlast them, to wait them out. Much of bad parenting comes from a lack of willingness to engage the child at the level mandated by the parent. The child wants to make it their event, and the parent has to not allow that to happen. If you say "you're going to clean your room before you go to the mall," you have to make that stick no matter how much it takes.

[noamnety]

15. +1

I'd add though that I would need context, because sometimes disciplining ASAP removes the options to let kids find out naturally what the consequences of their actions are.

It would depend on whether they are disturbing other people, whether they are harming themselves, whether they are engaging in behavior to gain attention, in which case NOT giving attention is the way to go.

I'm remembering one neighbor boy who was begging and begging for a fisher price drill. And he was a little destructive at times. He got the drill, pulled the wind up string of it all the way, and cut off the string. Then he realized the drill was broken.

That was a better lesson for him in many ways than parents pulling the scissors out of his hand.

[TexasObserver]

22. Yes, it's important to craft the response to the situation.

If one seldom raises their voice to their child, it has meaning when they do so. Parents that yell at their kids all the time are only proving they have lost control of the parenting process. Yelling does no good, unless it is done rarely, in which case everyone remembers the time mom went off about whatever it was mom went off about.

If they are about to hurt themselves or others, you have to stop them. But if it's just a bobo they're going to get for ignoring your admonition not to run under the table (such as a three year old, who doesn't realize the day is coming when he can't run UNDER the table any more), let the kid take their licks. Pain is a good teacher against rash actions, but best when self induced by one's own conduct. I don't favor it for one person against another.

[Sebastian Doyle]

4. Well that all depends....

If you're the DLC, and the children are insurance companies, then buy them a Ferrari, and tell everybody that you just cured their discipline problem.

[peace13]

5. Kick them off the plane first...

and ask questions later!

[uppityperson]

6. Shoot them. eom

[happy2bhere]

7. geez, a little harsh?

Try the tazer first...

[JVS]

24. It's the only way they'll learn

[geek_sabre]

8. other: adoption

[L0oniX]

9. Kick them off the plane.

[Bumblebee]

10. wrong forum, don't you think? is there a contest for the stupidest poll

going on of which I was not aware?!

[undeterred]

12. OTHER: Stick them in the dog crate for a few hours.

Without the dog.

[AndyA]

13. Remove them from the area immediately so they don't disturb others who also are likely

PAYING GOOD MONEY to be there. Eating, flying, whatever...no one enjoys listening to a brat scream, yell, and run around.

Take them someplace where they won't disturb others then deal with it. If they don't learn, LEAVE THEM AT HOME.

[Kansas Wyatt]

20. +1

[rucky]

14. because we don't have enough flame wars here today.

[Xenotime]

16. Discipline=child abuse in most cases.

Parents don't know when to stop and go over the edge and then cause harm.

[Arkansas Granny]

17. Discipline = teaching. Discipline and punishment are not the same thing.

[11 Bravo]

25. If you have kids, I hope I never enjoy the pleasure of their company on an airplane.

"Discipline = child abuse" may be the single dumbest thing I've ever read on an internet message board.
I have two well- behaved sons, ages 16 and 13. I've never laid a hand on them, but I have had to discipline them on occasion.

[slackmaster]

18. Sometimes it's best to ignore them and let them tire themselves out

If their behavior is creating a safety hazard, it must be stopped immediately.

There is a whole spectrum of shades of gray between those extremes.

[GTurck]

19. We think of discipline...

as some form of violence but that does not have to be. When I shopped with my kids for groceries they were not allowed to nag for food or throw tantrums. Nagging meant that food was off the list for the month. Tantrums meant we left the store in mid-shopping. I also didn't believe in physical punishment but the power of positive reinforcement for good behavior. Funny thing is my kids only misbehaved once each between 18 months and 2 years and I never needed to raise my voice in public. They have grown into exemplary gentlemen of whom I am very proud.
Someday I will admit to you all the mistakes I made later in their lives but mostly that was not discipline problems but personality clashes. LOL

[JVS]

23. There are different things to do in different situations.

[moobu2]

26. You should be careful that you’re not

just taking your anger and frustrations out on them. Always reward good behavior, and carefully measure discipline, by taking away a privilege when children violate the rules. Never ever strike anyone, and that includes pets. Hitting someone (or even a pet) might be effective at stopping the bad behavior short term, however it creates more and deeper problems later on.