Helping Dick Cheney Remember

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

Poor Dick Cheney seems to have a devil of a time remembering what went on during his time as Vice President, particularly during his first term, when asked by the FBI about the illegal "outing" of undercover CIA agent Valerie Plame Wilson. (An action which, of course, could never damage Agency morale the way prosecuting 'interrogators' who exceeded their authority would...)

As there are many different theories on the best way to "jog" a person's memory, what would you recommend to help poor Dick "fill-in the gaps"?

[Cyrano]

1. If we waterboard Cheney, what makes us any better than him?

Cheney, Bush, Rumsfeld and so many others need to be shipped off to the The Hague to answer for their crimes against humanity that they committed over the past eight years.

This is not just an "American issue." It's an issue that the civilized world needs to judge.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

3. I totally agree with you...

... but that doesn't mean I can't enjoy thinking about it!

And for what it's worth, I would not only thoroughly enjoy seeing him scoop Bo's poop, but I'd really love to hear what he might say under hypnosis...

[WinkyDink]

5. I think the wording of the poll suggests humor.

[Cyrano]

9. I get it. But we should still ship him and his cohorts off to The Hague.

[Altoid_Cyclist]

2. I still prefer trying this in addition to all of the above methods.

Sodium thiopental

Sodium thiopental, better known as Sodium Pentothal (a trademark of Abbott Laboratories), thiopental, thiopentone sodium, or trapanal, is a rapid-onset short-acting barbiturate general anaesthetic. It is an intravenous ultra-short-acting barbiturate. Sodium thiopental is a depressant and is sometimes used during interrogations—not to cause pain (in fact, it may have just the opposite effect), but to weaken the resolve of the subject and make him or her more compliant to pressure.

I vote for anything that gets the truth past those sneering reptilian lips.

[PDJane]

4. Waterboarding is out......

Cheney would not survive waterboarding. Sodium Pentathol is an idea.

However, whatever the truth is, and I would also like to know, I can almost promise that is would not be made public. The crimes of the administration usually aren't.

[HughMoran]

7. That would be a shame.

So, let's break out the waterboard!

[HughMoran]

6. I clicked waterboarding

...then read the post. :rofl:

[avaistheone1]

8. How about manacle him to a ceiling naked?

Cheney thought it would work for "the terrorists". It might be even more effective on him to jog his memory.

[AndyA]

10. Waterboarding: It's not torture...it's "Enhanced Interrogation" and it's legal.

The Bush Administration says so. And apparently that's good enough for Obama since nothing has been done about it so far.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

14. a.k.a."extreme baptism" nt

[NoSheep]

11. I clicked waterboarding but I really want him to take some LSD and

watch footage of Iraqi's cradling their blood soaked children. I believe in rehabilitation.

[The Midway Rebel]

16. My first DU +1! n/t

+1 :party:

[NoSheep]

17. Why thanks, Midway Rebel!

I believe we would have a much better society if everyone were required to experience some sort of enlightenment...Whatever works is okay with me. It seems a blinding hypocrisy that it is legal in our society for the powers that be to put criminals to death yet apparently unthinkable to see if something like LSD might rehabilitate them.

As "smart" as someone like Cheney would have to be in order to do what he and his ilk have managed to do...I do believe their kind are missing something essential to happiness...they have a "dumb spot" in that sense(kind of like a blind spot) Hard to imagine they know what true happiness is.

[Swamp Rat]

12. Give me a water board, Dick Cheney and one hour and I’ll have him confess to the Sharon Tate murders

Navy SEAL Jesse Ventura volunteers to waterboard Cheney.

One of the most repeated lines from conservatives in the debate over interrogations is that waterboarding is not torture because it is performed on U.S. troops as part of training. Yesterday on CNN’s Larry King Live, former Minnesota governor Jesse Ventura — a former Navy SEAL who has been waterboarded — poured cold water on this talking point, saying that waterboarding is in fact “drowning.” Ventura said he could waterboard Vice President Cheney and get him to admit to anything:

KING: You were a Navy SEAL.

VENTURA: That’s right. I was water boarded, so I know — at SERE School, Survival Escape Resistance Evasion. It was a required school you had to go to prior to going into the combat zone, which in my era was Vietnam. All of us had to go there. We were all, in essence — every one of us was water boarded. It is torture.

KING: What was it like?

VENTURA: It’s drowning. It gives you the complete sensation that you are drowning. It is no good, because you — I’ll put it to you this way, you give me a water board, Dick Cheney and one hour, and I’ll have him confess to the Sharon Tate murders.

Video at link:
http://thinkprogress.org/2009/05/12/ventura-cheney-torture

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

13. No wonder all the Guantanamo detainees

... confessed they wanted to become citizens so that they could vote for Bush.

[Bitwit1234]

15. I just knew you would have waterboarding..lets do it.

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

18. Can't believe 'Ginkgo' got no votes. n/t