I know Halloween is over, but wanted to share this scary screed with you

[Zomby Woof]

Lifted from a group on FB called "Conservative, Christian, Pro-Life, Pro-Gun, Pro Death Penalty". It's scary, insane, and downright hilarious at the same time. Who can resist the contradiction of being "pro-life" and "pro-death penalty"? I see this insane gibberish as a kind of Freeper Manifesto.


'Reading Books'

Fellow conservatives, answer me this. Why are liberals obsessed with reading books? What is it about books, which are just words on paper, that captivates liberals? I'll tell you what it is. It's these two things: 1) Liberals worship intellectuals. Liberals think the highest form of life is someone with lots ...of letters after their name. Intellectuals, who think they are better than everybody else, have leftists worshipping them because their pseudo-scientific theories help liberals convince themselves the nonsense they spout is true. Intellectuals write books in which they attack basic rights, such as the right to be successful, or spread liberal lies like 'climate change'. Liberals east it up, simply because the person who wrote the book has several degrees. Getting degrees is easy - all you have to do is read a lot of books. But liberals think it's the pinnacle of humanity to be an academic elitist. So when intellectuals write books liberals are compelled to buy them, read them and regurgitate the rubbish inside as 'fact' to back up their ridiculous claims. 2) Liberals can't think for themselves So instead, they use books as their way of forming whatever twisted ideas they have. Rather than form their opinions by common sense, reason and life experience, liberals just read a book and use whatever it says as their opinion. Without books, liberals would have to actually think for themselves. And if they thought rationally, they would realise how stupid their beliefs are. So rather than risk the consequences of independent thought, liberals just read books and pretend they thought of it themselves. There is only one book worth getting guidance from. It's called the Bible, and it's not just a book - it's the Word of God. Books are nothing but trouble. I'm sure you all agree.

--------


So um, project much? Why does Beck, Hannity, Coulter, Limbaugh, et al put books out there? Are the people who read them not real conservatives? Didn't Scalia have to read books to get through law school? Should we just ban books - save the bible - altogether? Since I am a liberal who can't think for himself, I need your help, O Wise Conservative!


:rofl: and :wtf: at the same time.

[FSogol]

1. That no-good Liberal book-learn'

:rofl:

[tekisui]

2. They are jealous of our superior ability to reason.

[Zomby Woof]

4. Hands down, my favorite line was...

"Books are nothing but trouble". :D

But then again, a bibliophile liberal like myself *would* mock such a sentiment. :evilgrin:

[old mark]

Trouble, indeed: Ya hafta do all that reedin', still caint catch the drift off it.

Dumm books anyhow. Should all be on TV.

mark

[Zomby Woof]

26. He hates TV too

He had a screed devoted to the tired old cliche of "liberal bias" on TV, and singled out Jon Stewart, "The West Wing", etc, as being un-American, socialist, etc.

[old mark]

35. So I guess you find a bible with pictures - catroons- and sit and read it

quietly, by yourself, then he will be happy.

Unless you are a liberal anyway.

mark

[riverbendviewgal]

3. This did make me laugh

My mom once told me she thought I was weird because I would go to my room and read.

I think being very hard of hearing and having no hearing aid did form the person I am today, open minded and curious about the world and concerned about the injustices in this world.

I highly recommend the book "Deer Hunting With Jesus" It is funny but oh so true.

[bikebloke]

29. I used to get yelled at for reading.

Instead of watching teevee. Also for using "big words". My parents were the prototype of today's anti-intellectuals. Luckily, the influence of a good grandmother and being stronger than them veered me away from their path.

[jus_the_facts]

5. I'm amazed they could put together a coherent paragraph....

...how'd they LEARN how since they hate books so much? :scared:

[Zomby Woof]

8. Another one of those hypocrisies

Um, I mean, clever contradictions, of course!

[jus_the_facts]

12. Yeah sounds a lot like most of the people I *reconnected* with on FB...

....didn't last very long on there before I deleted everybody and everything off mine. :yoiks:

[Zomby Woof]

14. I found my 2 oldest childhood friends on FB

Very pleased to have discovered that they are progressives too. One of my best friends from high school I had lost touch with is also progressive. The only conservatives are a small handful of relatives (many by marriage), which I have on "Hide". Throw in my wife, friends from college and adulthood, and a few DUers, and I would say my FB experience is a major positive. Sorry it didn't work out that way for you. :evilfrown:

[jus_the_facts]

21. You must remember where I'm from....most of the people I went to school with...

...weren't too much into book learnin' back in the day...and they've fucked their lives up so bad ever since they're now a bunch of fundy freakazoids. Just glad I don't run into any of them around town...but then again...I don't shop at WalMart either! :freak:

[Zomby Woof]

23. Oh I understand

I was afraid that was the reason. But you transcended your background, for which I commend you. :-)

[jus_the_facts]

30. Thank You kindly...

:loveya:

[liberalmuse]

6. Is this for real?

:rofl: :rofl:

I guess Einstein was a fucking idiot in their eyes.

[Zomby Woof]

10. It is VERY real

He has many more "insights" on there, but this was my favorite.

[PVnRT]

7. How did they know I got my 3,209 degrees by reading books?

I will use my secret liberal brain powers to give them impotence.

[Zomby Woof]

11. That explains their Viagra addiction

You're spreading impotence like wildfire with all those degrees. :o

[PVnRT]

13. I should, I have a degree in that

[Mad_Dem_X]

9. Wow.

I have no words. Just...:wow:

[LynzM]

15. Wow. Um.

Because, you know, diversifying the information pool that you have access to in your brain, in order to form those opinions, is a TERRIBLE THING!! :scared:

I can't even laugh.

[CatWoman]

16. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

just when I thought I heard/READ it all!!

:rofl:

[NoSheep]

17. Just when you think you've heard and seen it all from these morans...

you read this fucknobbery. I'm going to play around with this perfect "projection" as Zomby Woof so aptly named it:

Listening to fake news

Fellow progressives, answer me this. Why are conservatives obsessed with Limp-balls and Glen Blechh? What is it about hateful assholes, which are just paid puppets, that captivates conservativess? I'll tell you what it is. It's these two things: 1) Conservatives worship money . They think the highest form of life is someone with lots and lots of money...Capitalists, who think they are better than everybody else, have conservatives worshipping them because their pseudo-conservative lies like 'climate change isn't real'. Conservatives eat it up it simply because the person who said it is rich. Getting rich is easy - all you have to do kiss a lot of ass and lie a lot. But conservatives think it's the pinnacle of humanity to be rich. So when wealthy corporations pay the media to do their bidding conservatives are compelled to obey them, blindly follow them and regurgitate the rubbish the see on TV as 'fact' to back up their ridiculous claims. 2) Conservatives can't think for themselves So instead, they use paid puppets as their way of forming whatever twisted ideas they have. Rather than form their opinions by common sense, reason and life experience, conservatives just listen to Fox news and use whatever it says as their opinion. Without Fox News, conservatives would have to actually think for themselves. And if they thought rationally, they would realise how stupid their beliefs are. So rather than risk the consequences of independent thought, conservatives just listen to Fox and Limp-balls and pretend they thought of it themselves. There are so many places to get guidance from. It's called the REAL WORLD, and it's not just an episode of Dragnet- Capitalist pigs are nothing but trouble. I'm sure you all agree.




:eyes:

[LynzM]

19. Brilliant.

:thumbsup:

[NoSheep]

20. Amazing isn't it? Mia Culpa indeed.

[Zomby Woof]

22. Love it!

:thumbsup:

[yowzayowzayowza]

18. Truthiness personified. n/t

[CherokeeDem]

24. This is so truly absurd...

I'm not certain what to say! How could anyone believe this drivel?

[deutsey]

32. I've actually had a rightwinger "accuse" me of going to college

as if it's something I should be ashamed of. He's also said that I was brainwashed and indoctrinated in college.

[Hekate]

25. Which came first: the state of our schools or this state of mind? Such idiocy is frightening...

No wonder Sarah Palin has such an ardent following! :scared:

Hekate

[Arugula Latte]

28. Don't forget the influence of religion for making people stupid.

Not all religions/sects push idiocy, but there are plenty that do. "Don't think, turn off your brain, have FAITH, not reason."

[dixiegrrrrl]

36. Didn't she jsut....write a book?

Wonder who the hell she thought would read it, then.

[reggie the dog]

27. and all the while I have been thinking that reading books helps

me to make a more informed decision when I think and draw my own conclusions.

Also if getting degrees is so easy why does only about 10 or 15% of America have a Master's degree or higher? I had not only to read (often more than a thousand pages a week during grad school) but had to write and discuss about what I had read. I also had to do a 60 page long research paper based on both primary and secondary sources..... Oh well, at least we know that conservatives are now anti bible because after all the bible is a book and conservatives would not want anyone finding arguments in a book after all....

[intheflow]

31. Just went to the fb page, there's a member plugging her new book.

Oh, the irony!!! :rofl:

[damntexdem]

33. Relying solely on the Bible?

Fellow agnostics, answer me this. Why are RW Christians obsessed with reading the Bible? What is it about the Bible, which are just words on paper, that captivates RW Christians? I'll tell you what it is. It's these two things: 1) RW Christians worship know-it-all preachers. RW Christians think the highest form of life is someone with lots ...of claims of infallibility. Know-it-all preachers, who think they are better than everybody else, have fundies worshipping them because their pseudo-scientific theories help RW Christians convince themselves the nonsense they spout is true. Know-it-all preachers spout the Bible in which they attack basic rights, such as the right to be thoughtful, or spread fundie lies like 'literal interpretation of the Bible'. RW Christians eat it up, simply because the person who wrote the Bible lived several millennia ago. Getting authoritarian is easy - all you have to do is read a lot of the Bible. But RW Christians think it's the pinnacle of humanity to be a born-again Christian. So when know-it-all preachers spout the Bible RW Christians are compelled to listen, quote them and regurgitate the rubbish they spout as 'fact' to back up their ridiculous claims. 2) RW Christians can't think for themselves So instead, they use the Bible as their way of forming whatever twisted ideas they have. Rather than form their opinions by common sense, reason and life experience, RW Christians just read the Bible and use whatever their preacher says about it as their opinion. Without the Bible, RW Christians would have to actually think for themselves. And if they thought rationally, they would realize how stupid their beliefs are. So rather than risk the consequences of independent thought, RW Christians just read the Bible and pretend they thought of it themselves. There is only one source worth getting guidance from. It's called informed thinking for oneself, and it's not just a book - it's the way to combine one’s own experience with what one learns from others. Know-it-all preachers spouting the Bible are nothing but trouble. I'm sure you all agree.

[dixiegrrrrl]

34. The Bible is NOT words on paper????

"they use books as their way of forming whatever twisted ideas they have. "
No cognitive dissonance there, by golly.



And thank god all you have to do to get a degree is read a lot of books.
That makes a bunch of us very ...de-greed, indeed.

[TrogL]

37. I've been reading Jung's 'Psychological Types'

What the author of our little rant above has just described is the classic clash between intravert and extravert, except that he's got some of it backwards. Intellectuals/intraverts do think for themselves, they simply pick up new ideas from books to add to the mix.

Extraverts however, instead get focused on the object (eg. the Bible), rarely think for themselves preferring to pick up a few catch phrases from the latest authoritarian type -eg. Rush Limbaugh.

[Divine Discontent]

38. I love the words/edicts of Christ - too bad so many try their best to soil those words by pretending

to be "Christian". They act as if, well, you see, we're for the death penalty and pro-life because no one should not be given the chance to live and be sin free, but we're all for slaughterin' the sinners, no second chances, that's what the Old Testament says, dammit, and we're proud of it!




Seriously, they make me cringe and I want to throw up on them. They've no shame. If they really loved Christ, they'd take the Sermon on the Mount to heart and love EVERYONE equally, and forgive the sinner, for we all are sinners (if one chooses to believe in sin).

I liked your rant.

[Kievan Rus]

39. Books are filled with scary facts...like science and tolerance and knowledge, oh my!

[G_j]

40. books, which are just words on paper...

that's the ticket!
Grunt!
I liked cave drawings better.