I live among barbarians.

[ccharles000]

I am so pissed that I am the only liberal in my family that I know of. I am mad that I am the only young person(that I can think of)in my family interested in politics. I hate that when someone in my family makes a joke about shooting fags everyone laughs and I am afraid to say anything because I am not all the way out. So many people in my family are brain washed by fox and I have to hear their smug self righteous asses all day. It is not all bad many of the younger people in my family support GLBT rights but don't vote or care much about what happens. I feel like I am the only thinking person in my family and I hate it.

[BlooInBloo]

1. Yeah, that's pretty shitty. :(

If stories with happy endings work for you, check out: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2009/10/3/181549/173

[GreenPartyVoter]

2. The younger ones may yet come around. I didn't really get into politics until the election disaster

of 2000. I was 28.

There are plenty of things going south right now: the economy, jobs, war, global climate change, civil/human rights... Any one of these or something else might spark an interest (or a feeling of desperation, like so many of us here have.)

:hug:

[Xipe Totec]

3. I am the oldest, and most liberal in my family

Followed by my youngest brother.

Everyone in the middle is either conservative, or dead.

What can you do?

:shrug:

[YOY]

4. Meh...we love ya bro.

So chipper up.

[gateley]

5. I understand your frustration --

I get so ANGRY when my family or friends just blow this stuff off -- "they'll just do what they want anyway, it doesn't matter "or "oh, boy, another speech?". They are almost proud of their ignorance! I want to kick 'em!

But they would NEVER make a joke about shooting fags or make racial slams, for that at least I'm grateful.

:hug:

[Hepburn]

6. Well, consider the DU your home ...

... and here is a huge from a mom-person...:hug:

[donheld]

11. That's actually the best thing about DU

It's a community of liberal/progressive people who come together to escape the insanity
of the conservative crap we are so many times surrounded by. I hope Charles and all others
feel like it's a kind of family. A big extended family. Yea sometimes even we fight but still
we have each others back in time of need.

[donheld]

7. I'm the only liberal in my family too

Everybody knows i'm gay but nobody will talk about it. Most of the rest of my family are very religious. My mom loves listening to Rush and Laura Ingraham. She will bring up some right wing topic and as soon as I call her on the lies she's been fed she changes the subject. My brother is a big right winger too. Calls me a baby killer because I'm pro-choice. My sister just totally refuses to talk politics at all, she will not let politics be discussed in her house. Her husband kind of talks like a red-neck. It's hard, but thankfully I have quite a few very liberal friends.

[RKP5637]

8. Hang in there and just know you're not alone. DU is a helpful bunch to help keep your spirits up!

[Kceres]

9. When I was living in Tennessee I often felt the same way. But remember,

When friends and your relatives have a life-changing experience and start coming around to more enlightened point of view, they will seek you out. Of course, it won't be everyone and it may take years, but it will happen. I promise. You are planting seeds. Just hang in there. In the long run you will find it rewarding.

[BuyingThyme]

10. Well, it's gotta be better than being one of them.

[PerpetuallyDazed]

12. My in-law family are conservatives, too...

I just try to keep reminding myself that their anger/hostility towards liberals like myself come from a place of fear. That's why I try to make an effort to be positive, reminding them when I can that the world isn't such a scary place and we all have so much more in common with each other than we realize.

Reading Marshall Rosenberg's "Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life" has really helped me come to terms with my anger and frustration on this subject.

Hang in there! :hug:

[msongs]

13. "shooting fags" and you dont speak out. closet or not shooting ppl is not ok is it? except for the

people on DU who get off on righteous killings of course.

Msongs

[ccharles000]

14. I would have said something but when I heard it I became very depressed and did not want to talk.

I should have I know and I feel bad because I did not.

[BlooInBloo]

18. Don't feel bad about it. People can't stand up *all* the time - especially..

in a society that puts as much pressure on gay folks as ours. That would be a LOT of standing up - much more than can be expected of any human being.

[Aragorn]

16. I tend to agree

but assertiveness is not easy either. More for some less for others. Speaking up is the only thing that helps - but it doesn't always help.

I was just gonna say, in my family it was "shoot the long-hairs". Almost every male of my generation therefore grew long hair.

Of course I am prodigal but I never bother to see them. It may be that's what you are gonna have to decide some day.

[Gman2]

15. Living in the closet is soulkilling, gay or dem. State your mind.

anyone who wont tolerate it, it is better to know now, than when you really NEED THEM. My family, almost disowned me during the last election. My sisters sent winger hate mail against the ill and poor. I am poor, cuz I have heart failure. They said, that I was causing trouble. I stood my ground. You must stand your ground. With respect, but stand your ground. The earlier you start, the better.

[theorbiter]

17. I understand....

My in laws are a Baptist, conservative, hopelessly Midwest family. I am a liberal Jew so you can imagine the white elephant at family functions.
It seems that people from the right end of the political spectrum have lost all ability to use decorum, tact or courtesy when spouting the talking points which they memorize. Of course the sources from which they receive their "education" offer vile, heated noise and none of the positive traits of dialogue themselves. I honestly think some believe that EVERYONE who is worth their salt thinks as they do, thus the concepts of keeping your politics and religion to yourself has become passe'.
Several times the term "Jew ya down" has been used in my presence without so much as a hesitation or after thought. Of course the Obama/socialist garbage flows aplenty. My mother in law honestly believed that the Obama school speech had ulterior, sinister, hidden agendas. Maddening.

[Mari333]

19. I will adopt you.

:hug:

[MrScorpio]

20. Some "fags" are shooting back

You should remind them of that

[DeschutesRiver]

21. Pink Pistols was the name of GL group I saw on a documentary

Can't remember which channel it was on, but they were discussing the gay/lesbian group named The Pink Pistols, and gave a few interviews and showed a clip with members of one chapter who were having a target practice. A few of them had prevented an attack on themselves once they made their aggressors aware that they had brought their fists to a potential gunfight.

To the OP: It never fails to amaze me, when I am speaking to some of these dumb ass repubs in my community and beyond, how smug they are that they will simply beat the hell out of or shoot the majority of the country into submission. There is simply no awareness by them that not all of their victims will cooperate with their rage induced attacks by rolling over and dying. I've been an armed Independent for over 30 years, in a rural ranching community surrounded by others both independent and democrat, who are armed. Yet, even our local republican fundie morons think these "types" will be easy pickings - probably because we don't go around waving our guns and banners, or picking fights, so they assume we don't have them or because we don't shout, we are too soft to protect ourselves.

I also am finding it amusing that these republicans don't seem to realize that they are in the minority now, and that no, they will not be taking control of our country again, at least not for a decade or two. If they really wanted to TAKE BACK THEIR COUNTRY, well, what is stopping them now? Absolutely nothing. Don't these "patriots" get that war will hurt and involve death whenever it happens - there won't be some silent coup. So how come they don't get started taking over tomorrow? Why endlessly blog on the internet and chat in chatrooms or send stupid emails about it? Why act like 5 year old throwing tantrums at town halls? What are they waiting for?

Courage of their convictions? Probably not. They seem to just be waiting for someone to give it to them on a silver platter, with an apology for this brief democratic moment where the majority now gets to work on having all voices heard and cleaning up the horrendous mess left by the idiots last in charge. It is all over but the shouting now (maybe some violence, but in the end, it won't be any more than we've ever seen before as a country, when big social change happens).

These people are desperately unhappy. There is nothing to be done about it, and nothing good will come to them if they act out their fantasies. Stay away from toxic people. It is hard when it is your family, but if you can't find a way to cut out the bad noise they make and therefore you get no happiness from the good things about them, then cull the herd. I had to do this with my family years ago, for many reasons, and it was hard at the time. Now, it freaks me out to think I might have stayed around all that toxic noise forever - my life would have been a mess.

I hope your family isn't as far gone as mine, or that you have to make hard choices. Hope you can find a midde ground, but if not, remember you only have one life. Live it toxin free as much as possible.

[elshiva]

22. Sorry, ccharles000.

I've been in that situation, where people start saying nasty homophobic things and not said anything. Sometimes it's okay to save yourself in such times when you are clearly outnumbered.

I wish there was a GLBT group in your area. Always remember that you are a great man and that's it's great to be a gay man. :hug: :hug:

Just keep looking on the internet for pro-GLBT sites and articles, as you've been doing. Please keep sharing your experiences with us on DU.