All Black People Are Jerks. Jerks I say!

[Scriptor Ignotus]

Whoa! That came out wrong. That is NOT what I meant to say. So sorry. My bad. I just really didn't articulate myself well. I'm a good person, I just said a bad thing.

I apologize if I offended anyone, whether they be black, brown, off-white, or other-wise not http://www.thecarpetbaggerreport.com/archives/10405.html">"clean-skinned".

It was an idiot comment meant to amuse. Won't happen again.

I hope my comments do not reflect poorly on DU or the Internet as a whole.

I will be meeting with Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson to apologize. There, case closed. Let's move on.

Also, I am an alcoholic and will be entering rehab to cure me of the twin threats of alcoholism and racism. Alright, alright, also homosexuality. I caught a bug over the weekend. I should be cured by next Tuesday.

Just in case anyone here is still upset at what I said, you should at least listen to my supporters. Like journalist Tom Oliphant:

“Whatever problem there was, I think that he took care of with his statement on Friday. It was classic Scriptor. He said he screwed up and he was sorry. Bang. Bang. It was very much to the point, and did not offer any excuses.” http://www.nytimes.com/2007/04/09/business/media/09carr.html?8dpc">Source

You see? It's over. I apologized. Let's get on with our lives.

Also, you should know that I do charity work. With kids. Kids with cancer. I make them do yard work on my multi-million dollar ranch which gives them self esteem and helps build character. I do so much good work with kids, that I could use the N-word if I wanted to. I would NEVER do that, but I'm just trying to say -- THAT's how much charity stuff I do. Between my overt racism and my charity work, it's a wash. They cancel out, like Barack Obama's blackness with his whiteness.

So in conclusion I am not a racist and in fact, never said anything racist to begin with. There really is no issue here. I apologized, over nothing really, and we can all move on now. If you'll excuse me, I need to go cash my check from MSNBC now. Good day...jerks.

:sarcasm:

[ThomCat]

1. LOL!

:applause:

Kick and recommend.

[frogcycle]

2. well done n/t

[katsy]

3. Ha! You got your finger on the pulse of this BS.

k/r

:applause:

[SammyWinstonJack]

4. Nicely done!

:applause:

[BeFree]

5. Asshole!

People like you are the scum of the earth.

_{Not you, him.}

[Rosemary2205]

6. THANKS. K&R

Wish I had 1/4 of your talent! :)

[CatWoman]

7. I may be a jerk, but I'm also unce, tice, fee times a mady

[AspenRose]

15. Bwahahaha

:-)

[PurpleChez]

17. "Mr. Wheat! Mr. Wheat!" "Des?"

BOOM!

[StefanX]

8. K&R

Very good!

I hope someone forwards this to Imus.

[jollyreaper2112]

9. you forgot one

"Man, what's up with that frigid bitch? She certainly could use a good lay. Gentleman that I am, I'm willing to help her out on that matter. Nay, spare your applause. I'm sure any of you would do no less for an attractive woman who's asking for it." Also, you forgot to say something nasty about midgets. And the left-handed.

[kdpeters]

10. Us gay people are always wrong too

Whatever it is... it's always our fault.

Blacks are no different. They are to blame for everything. That's just our nature. Black, gay whatever ... we started everything that bothers those fine folks in middle America. It's our fault and that's why we can't be treated with respect and equality like everyone else. It's the way we go about demanding equal treatment that prevents them from treating us with equality and respect they demand from us.

It's us. It's only us. It's always us. It has always and ever been our fault. Why do we persecute them so?

[Solly Mack]

11. Excellent

[goclark]

12. Two little 1st graders get in a fight and the teacher says "Say you are sorry."

"I'm sorry" doesn't cut it for 1st graders because they don't mean it. It's the fastest way to get the teacher off of your back. They learn that at an early age.

IMUS must have learned it too and for sure he does not mean that he is "Sorry" for insulting someone because he and his buddies do it every day."

They have gotten away with it for years and they don't give a shit what anyone says.

He doesn't like African Americans, except Harold Ford and Ford must have given him a bundle for his camp and little bottles of green soap.

All he knows is that he wants to keep selling his friend's books,keep taking the write off for his camp~he was in trouble for the camp once. Did he say he was "sorry" and get off?

He is arrogant and a bigot and watch, he will walk away clean and keep on doing the same thing.

[femrap]

13. So now 'Imess' gets a 2 week suspension....

just like he was in high school. I still haven't heard if that suspension is with or without pay.

Will we ever evolve? It's so damn depressing when I think that so many of these racist and sexist issues were put to rest back in the '60's and '70's. I had no idea that there were people out there like rove and norquist who hated the era of 'Peace, Love and Rock n' Roll.'

So the hatred spew continues and of late seems to flourish.

I want 'Imess' FIRED.

[live love laugh]

14. You forgot to ask to meet with ALL black people. DO IT!!!!

:silly:

[orleans]

16. yes, not only should the OP meet with all black people but they OP should

buy them all lunch!

and a present.

nicely wrapped.

with a bow!

do it! dooo i!!!

[Scriptor Ignotus]

19. hey I apologized

that should be the food equivalent of a steak dinner. Or chicken. I know the blacks like chicken.

Oh damn! I did it again. I apologize. I'll meet with Al and Jesse (who can create a "phone tree" and distribute my apology to the entire black community) and I'm sorry and ok let's move on. It was a joke, it came out wrong, no offense meant.

Please ignore my obvious history of racist and misogynistic remarks. Just mere aberrations. When you're on the radio for so many hours a day, who knows what might pop out?

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go interview an "insider" journalist with lots of access to the White House who is supposed to be critical of the government and isn't because they're golf buddies with the very people they should be investigating and while they're out playing golf 18 and 19 year old kids from Smalltown, America are being killed or maimed in an ill-conceived, poorly executed war based on false pretenses that the journalists should have known about but didn't due to the aforementioned cronyism. Apparently said journalist just wrote a book about how great America was and/or is and wants to pimp it out on my show, btw it's $25 hard cover and on bookshelves now!

I'm a whore.

:sarcasm:

[PurpleChez]

18. I was bitching yesterday

about how when a right winger does something like this they just have to say they were kidding and apologize and everybody moves on. (Ann the *** Coulter is tops at that.) But maybe not this time. Wonder why....

[ejbr]

20. I wonder if Tom Oliphant

is okay with these words that were stated without hesitation or shame by a co-host on the March 29th broadcast: "fat faggot"

Oops! I forgot, Tom's not fat. Nevermind!
:eyes:

[Richard Steele]

21. Well stated!