Vice Presidential Handlers Lure Cheney Into Traveling Crate

[meegbear]

A team of nine specially trained handlers have successfully lured outgoing vice president Dick Cheney into a reinforced steel traveling crate in order to transport him back to his permanent enclosure in Casper, WY, official sources reported Monday. "He's a smart one. Once he sees the crate, he gets pretty nippy, but we've learned a few tricks over the years," chief VP wrangler Ted Irving breathlessly said while applying pressure to a deep gash on his forearm. "If we break a rabbit's legs and throw it in there, he will eventually go in to finish it off. Doesn't work with dead rabbits, though. Cheney only eats what he kills." Irving said that the latest vice presidential relocation went much more smoothly than September's diplomatic trip to Georgia, which was delayed for several hours after Cheney mauled three secret service agents and escaped inside the White House walls.

http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/vice_presidential_handlers

[Myrina]

1. ROFL

:applause: :rofl:

Too bad it's almost true ...

[cascadiance]

2. Is he "practicing" now before he takes the real smuggling trip to Dubai later?

Anyone have info on our current extradition treaties with Dubai?

[applegrove]

3. LMAO. If you don't laugh..you have to cry at how scary it is.

[gratuitous]

4. Bunnies with broken legs

I would have taken my oath that only unicorn blood would lure Dick Cheney.

[eppur_se_muova]

5. Thought they used a tethered live goat for that.

It's an effective lure whether he's looking for food or ... you know ...

[cynatnite]

6. Here is the pic...