How do you feel about maintaining a friendship with a Republican?

[spooky3]

A Republican in another city contacted me after the election, said he'd voted for Obama, and wanted to renew the friendship. I haven't talked to him in a long time, but thought I'd try emailing for awhile and see how it went. He's got a lot of good qualities. But sorry to say, the vote seemed to be based more on "inspiration" than on values and there is conflict over some pretty fundamental things - some things haven't changed as much as I had hoped that his vote suggested. I have Republican family members so I have some experience with this type of situation, and one good friend who is libertarian (who is married to a liberal, and they have an agreement not to discuss politics). But I am perplexed by how difficult it seems to be.

So I was curious as to whether anyone here had any thoughts about this. Do you find it to be worth the effort to be friends with people who have very different views from yours? Do you simply avoid this type of friendship? Or have you found something that works for you?

[lonestarnot]

1. Hmm mmm. Avoid dat.

:hi:

[emilyg]

2. I don't judge my friends on party affiliation.

[Wwagsthedog]

55. Second that. nt

[Bonn1997]

110. Third that...

I posted a similar thread about a month ago on establishing romantic relationships with Republicans, but here we're talking about just a friendship??? I know plenty of hardcore Republicans who are good people who I'm happy to have in my life as friends. Look at the values of a terrorist like Osama Bin Laden for a moment and then you'll realize how many basic values you do share with most Republicans. If I have a friend who is a hardcore Republican, I don't even bother debating politics with them and I tend to talk to someone else or change the topic if politics comes up; I know I won't change their minds and the argument will just be tiresome at best. My liberal step brother loves having political discussions with conservative Republicans. I guess everyone's different.

Why not try out the friendship and see how it goes? If it ends up merely causing significant stress in your life, obviously it's not worthwhile.

[Orsino]

77. Political affiliation is a part of the picture, for me...

...and certain affiliations will automatically lessen the amount of trust I extend a person. It's possible, though, to have healthy relationships which cross important divides, and I do try to allow for the possibility that I am wrong.

It could happen. :hippie:

[Blarch]

83. BS, It's beyond that.

The second vote for Bush was also a vote for torture, murder, wars based on lies, wiretapping, ect... It goes WAY beyond 'political affiliation'

It was a vote against our Constitution, and I would never associate with scum like that.

[DemoTex]

98. Bu$h .. he's got Tim Russert eyes ..

And he'll tease you
He'll grease you
All the better just to fleece you
He's murderous and he knows just what it takes to make blood gush
He's got Hank Kissinger stand-off sighs
He's got Tim Russert eyes

(Apologies to Kim Carnes)

[Bonn1997]

111. I think most Republicans don't know or believe that

I highly doubt they explicitly value murder or torture; otherwise, we'd see about 50% of the population committing murder and torturing others. They just never get the full, fair info. from the media.

[pipi_k]

101. When I looked at your title line quickly...

I thought it said, "I don't judge my friends on party affliction"


:7

[Forkboy]

108. It speaks volumes about a person's ideals and beliefs.

It's far from the only factor I use in deciding whether to be friends with someone, but it's one of them, and I feel zero shame in saying so. I have no use for people against abortion, against civil rights, against the constitution, etc. These aren't people I have any urge to be friends with in the first place.

[jeff30997]

3. I don't care....

as long as her implants stay in place.

[Vickers]

31. I'm so glad to meet someone else as shallow as me.

:pals:

[jeff30997]

35. Lol,Hey, I'm more shallow than a Bush IQ test !!!

Would you marry me ?

[Vickers]

63. Hell yeah! Dude, wait'll you see my bewbies...

:P

[jeff30997]

78. Hey,hey hey..

Come on, show be your bewbies...:P

[Xenotime]

4. Avoid 100% They are not deserving of the air they breath.

[cali]

79. seek help. if you believe that, you need it. sick.

[ThomWV]

5. I do not forget the horseshit I heard come out of people's mouths, or who they were

If they were recent converts to the light they can just as easily fall back to the dark side. They had no backbone to start with and they are untrustworthy now.

On Edit: P.S. All those Jesus-freeks can kiss my ass too.

[chucktaylor]

6. That depends on how much of a political loon you or they are.

I have plenty of friends on all sides. We agree on some things. disagree on others and continue to get along. It's only a problem when one person can't get over a simple disagreement. I think it is like religion. You don't have to believe what I do, just understand that I don't believe what you do.

[fishwax]

7. Doesn't seem to me like it would be much of a problem

I have friends with whom I'm sure I would disagree on most issues, politically. We talk about other things.

[shanti]

8. sorry, no can do

i'm shallow like that :eyes: don't need the stress either.

[patriotvoice]

9. Nothing will ever change if we surround ourselves with those of like mind.

To effect the change we want to see, we must branch out. That can strain friendships, but it's possible when you treat disagreements as an opportunity to learn about the other person, rather than an argument to win. It's important to understand that values arguments cannot be won: only by the weight of evidence presented AND the willingness of the other person to critically process what was said, can a value be changed.

[Mind_your_head]

42. Best/thoughtful answer, imo

:thumbsup:

[katandmoon]

10. I have some Republican friends. I simply don't talk politics with them.

We have other interests in common so I focus on that. I'm not going to change their minds politically any more than they're going to change mine.

[gratuitous]

11. As long as they're housebroken and behave themselves

I don't see why I can't maintain a civil tone with most Republicans. But as soon as I hear the kind of nonsense I heard from, oh 1976 until 2006, about my being a traitor and all that? Dead to me.

[CTyankee]

21. Absolutely, I refused to see my bil last summer because of this exact same problem!

I just couldn't see me dealing with a Republican in August right before this election. I didn't want him anywhere near me.

We avoided him and the sil. But the sil voted for Obama (praise goddess). I'm still not THAT happy with the two of them...we might have to deal with them next summer, who knows? By then, I think things will be better and I can bash him over the head if he starts anything...

[MadMaddie]

12. I would say give them a chance...

They of course would not give us a chance but that's because that's who they are...

We have to be careful about becoming them.....don't you think?

Let them come to you with questions and then educate them slowly and maybe they will pop their head out and get it maybe they won't. At that point you can at least say you did the right thing and gave them a chance.

[depakid]

13. At this point in time, identifying with Republicans indicates that a person has character issues

Personally, I avoid people like that....

[gravity]

14. I have no problem with it

I can get in heated discussions with my friends over politics, but then just agree to disagree and move on.

[dems_rightnow]

15. I don't even know the party affiliation

of many of my friends. We speak of many things, but rarely politics. In fact, I could care less their political leanings.

[bluedeminredstate]

16. I have some repub friends.

One in particular is a lovely, generous, wonderful friend. She's a repub because that's the way she grew up and she doesn't pay any attention to politics whatsoever. I love her, but we agree not to discuss politics b/c I get so fired up at her apathy and lack of knowledge and her blind support of all things Bush. I tell myself she doesn't know what she's talking about in this area and that helps me from choking her when she says stupid things about which she knows nothing.
I come from a family of repugs so I guess I'm adept at letting it go when necessary. Arguing over politics can be fun and spirited, but after 8 years of watching this clown posse destroy our nation I'm too pissed off for spirited discussion so I avoid it. It's worked out so far.

:hi:

[Wetzelbill]

17. I have lots of Republican friends

Many that I grew up with. After the beginning of the war it was tough sometimes because a few of them and I had heated words over things. I haven't ever been in touch with one guy ever since, he probably feels like a jackass because everything I said I was right on. Another friend and I had a strained relationship because of politics but he started seeing how bad things ended up being and he's totally changed his opinions on almost everything. Mostly, I try not to get into politics, but it's hard because it's a central component of my life.

I think it's worth it to know lots of different people. I don't make many Republican friends nowadays, I get along with them usually, but we don't end up really being "friends" or anything, just people I casually know and get along fine with. Most Republicans I know are people I grew up with, as I said at the beginning. I don't think you should ever avoid relationships with people unless you can't get along at all, it's the same as if you and somebody just don't like each other, if you and a Republican absolutely can't get along, don't force it. If you can, fine, but it's typically best to stay away from political talk as much as possible.

[ileus]

18. I'm friends with everyone....you can't let poltics get in the way.

[Joe the Liberal]

19. All my friends are people who I have something in common with.........

I wouldn't be friends with someone if we disagreed on things. I am someones friend because we share something in common, we believe in similar things, we have similar interests, hobbies, had similar experiences and have similar ways of thinking which brings us together. So no I could never be friends with a republican because we have nothing in common, we are from two different worlds, nothing brings us together.

[sam sarrha]

20. "Conservatives" are unfortunately Born that way.. it isn't a Choice, they lack 'Fluidity' in their

thinking because of Organic physical deficiencies in essential cognitive structures of the brain.

my personal view of this subject..if we cant legislate out the Phenomenological IRON LAW OF OLIGARCHY http://bitbucket.icaap.org/dict.pl?term=IRON%20LAW%20OF , then we must consider that.. they need to be put in walled Reservations and prevented from breeding, its the only way to humanely deal with them. we are all Doomed if they are left to continue to FUCK everything up and profit from it,they are obsessive compulsive sociopaths and some psychopathic and all out of control." :shrug:

search info.. brain differences

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/376166/brain_d...
"snip....Data analysis shows that liberals are about 5 times as likely as conservatives to show brain activity in the areas of the brain related to detecting conflicts between habitual tendency and a more appropriate response. Liberals are also more than twice as likely to score in the top half of the distribution for accuracy.Simply put, liberals tend to think much more than conservatives before acting, whereas conservatives tend to be much more habitual and conforming to established traditions...snip"

search info. Democrat brain differences
http://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-a&rls=org.m...

http://www.latimes.com/news/science/la-sci-politics10se...
"Frank J. Sulloway, a researcher at UC Berkeley's Institute of Personality and Social Research who was not connected to the study, said the results "provided an elegant demonstration that individual differences on a conservative-liberal dimension are strongly related to brain activity."

Analyzing the data, Sulloway said liberals were 4.9 times as likely as conservatives to show activity in the brain circuits that deal with conflicts, and 2.2 times as likely to score in the top half of the distribution for accuracy.

notice the difference in substance of the articles

search info for liberal brain differences
http://www.google.com/search?ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid...


search info for conservative brain differences
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=+concervative++bra...

[Selatius]

22. Then turn your friend into a simple acquaintance. Friends, by nature, are small in number.

A person can have many acquaintances, but ultimately, he only confides in a few individuals at most. Those are his friends.

[SammyWinstonJack]

23. I don't have republican friends. It's a personal choice.

[Ian David]

24. I cut loose my last Republicker friend right after Katrina. n/t

[L0oniX]

25. I've told them all to go fuck them selves. n/t

[jedr]

26. Friendships are established through common interests;

I tend to keep friends in "boxes" ( no sarcasm please). Some are larger than other ,but few cover the whole gambit. I don't often cook with motorcycle friends or or ride bike with sports friends, however , I do have some friends who cover most of my interests. The question is, what enjoyment do you gain from this person? You don't need to politically agree with all your friends. Is the enjoyment you gain from this person worth the hassle of avoiding a political discussion?:toast:

[Buzz Clik]

27. Anyone who chooses friends based on political orientation is misguided.

Christ, you're missing half the world.

[SammyWinstonJack]

32. Half the world I don't want to associate with. So no problem there.

:shrug:

[DoctorMyEyes]

46. The fucked in the brain half

It's not about political party, it's about the platforms and basic values conservatives have vs progressives. I have a few casual friendly relationships with some workplace republicans, but it's a kind of "forced relationship". Our relationships exist only because of forced proximity.

Republicans aren't people who joined a club I'm not interested in, or support an opposing sports team. They are people who believe in and support fucked up shit and vote for fucked up people who fuck up everybody's life. I have a hard time overlooking that. I have a hard time making small talk about pets and gardens and weather with people who think poor black people caused the housing bubble, that Saddam was a threat to the USA, that the war in Iraq was justified, that Ray Nagin is to blame for Katrina, that pharmacists shouldn't have to fill prescriptions for contraceptives, that the free market solves all problems, that global warming is a liberal hoax, that single payer healthcare is socialism and anything that might be considered socialist is inherently evil or inferior.

So, yeah - maybe I sometimes share a laugh with a Republican about some cute thing their kid did, or respect some small kindness they did for another person but I'm always quite aware that at heart they're either incredibly ignorant or incredibly callous and I don't "get past that", nor do I make an effort to.

[kristopher]

66. I just disassociated myself from two close relatives

With virtually the exact words you wrote. I've held it in out of respect for family unity, but xmas eve saw the end of my patience. No scene was made, I just left abruptly and explained to a neutral third party the next day. Decidedly uncomfortable, but better than the more probably satisfying alternative of stuffing their face into their sinus cavity.

I don't have the problem with all "Republicans" or "Conservatives". Just the Limbaugh etal trained ones that are "on a mission" to prove they've internalized wingnut talk radio's curricula on "dealing with" a "liberal". The Sarah Palin supporters, I suppose we should now call them.

[Posteritatis]

93. Closer to two and a half percent of the world, but yeah

[Buzz Clik]

97. Conservatives make up 2.5% of the world's population? Okaaaaay....

I guess all the conservatives live right here in the good old US of A.

My comment stands -- making friendships based on some sort of political crotch sniffing is bullshit.

[madokie]

28. I have several republican friends

been friends since way before either of us payed much attention to politics. Hell I even have some Republican family members. I think its foolish to base friendship on what party one belongs too.

[Believing Is Art]

29. Most of my friends are Republican

We talk about politics. Most of the time it never gets heated. When it does, we drop it and agree to cool off before we talk again. I think it really depends on the person. The biggest political argument I've had recently was actually with a liberal. She was someone who couldn't tolerate an opposing opinion. Depending on what type of person he is, I think it's definitely possible to be friends.

[trayfoot]

30. With my republican friends, I've found

that it is next to impossible to get along for any length of time. Even when I do not mention politics or persons, they always have to send derogatory emails or mention very controversial issues - anything they can think of to make me have a reaction. So, it usually winds up that I avoid these people because I do not wish to be constantly "baited" into an argument. Sad, but true.

[Libertyfirst]

33. Basically I am friends with those whom I share values. However,

can be friends with those whom I differ with on some things. I will not compromise on matters of fundamental human rights even for members of my family. I sometimes find that people who are racist, anti-semitic, anti-gay, anti-choice, etc, feel they have to carry their "message." I tell them I don't agree and, if possible, excuse myself and leave. I have had to do that at family dinner tables. I do not willingly share time with them again. I have heard enough hatred in my lifetime and I am not going to listen to anymore of it. I will have to leave the task of changing them to you younger folks. However, the only haters I have ever known to change were a family that learned they had a gay son. They became real advocates for gay people. But that is only one over many decades.

[spooky3]

34. Thanks to everyone who responded - keep 'em coming!

The diversity of opinions reflected is interesting.

[Chi-Town voter]

48. I think putting politics above friendship is piggish.

It marks the difference between an open-minded person and a bigot.

[Posteritatis]

94. +1 (nt)

[stillcool]

36. We have some republican leaning..

friends that we steer clear of discussing politics with, who are suddenly freaking out, which has changed the whole dynamic. They are way more open to discussing our sorry state of affairs, how we got here, and what we can possibly do to get out of it intact.

[Aristus]

37. I'm maintaining a happy marriage with a Republican, so nothing is impossible.

It helps that she's fairly moderate in her political beliefs. She opposes the Iraq War, loathes Bush, is against the death penalty, and supports strong gun control laws. When I told her that those positions would get her kicked out of every Republican summer camp in the country, she insists that she's a Republican because Republicans are "pro-life". I told her there are plenty of "pro-life" Democrats out there (I didn't use the inflammatory but more accurate term 'anti-choice') but she didn't listen. She was raised in a wealthy, "born-again" family, so it is in her blood, so to speak.

Anyway, politics aside, we're very happy together. She even likes Barack Obama, and expects him to be a good President.

[SammyWinstonJack]

39. Who isn't pro life? Democrats aren't pro abortion, they are pro choice. Who can't understand that?

And republican policies are hardly pro life. They are anything but that.

[Aristus]

44. I agree 100%.

Even a woman as intelligent and hard-headed as my wife is not immune to right-wing talking points. In the debate over abortion, surely you have seen normally rational people lose their heads?

[juno jones]

38. I find that I don't have enough in common with republicans

to even start a real friendship. That said, I am probably more lefty than 95% of the population, so most of my friends are somewhat more conventional/conservative than I am, albeit still mostly liberal types.

FWIW My advice: If you have a lot in common otherwise, hobbies, etc. explore the friendship. If you discover you don't, don't strain yourself to be much more than casual friendly aquaintances.

Your mileage may vary.

[hay rick]

40. Part of friendship is respect and

that's the rub. I have an abiding contempt for anyone who voted for GWB twice. I have a lot of long-term friends and family members who fall into that category. Truthfully, I consider those relationships damaged. It's a pity because they are mostly irreplaceable to me. Maybe the Obama years will bring some healing.

[jljamison]

41. not much choice in the matter

i married a republican, so I have to be friends with her :=)

actually, I managed to work on her enough over the last few years - this past election she didn't vote for Obama, but she didn't vote for McCain either

There is hope!

[NashVegas]

43. Maintaining? No Problem

But if the Republican in question was someone who I had a falling out with over politics, I wouldn't bother.

At the very least, I'd let them do the heavy lifting.

[Fireweed247]

45. It's not about party but personal politics

It is difficult to be friends with people who put their own interests above everyone else, people who want the government to waste money attacking innocent countries for no reason and spy on us at home but then constantly complain about paying taxes, who are hypocrites when it comes to actually following their claimed religion, people don't give a shit about what our government does to innocent people or can't be bothered to think about world events because they are so occupied with their oh so busy lives full of meaningless crap...I dunno but I just find that shallow...

[DoctorMyEyes]

47. Exactly!

You said it - and much more succinctly than I!

[backscatter712]

49. I had a Republican friend...

He has since turned into a Democrat. B-)

[RFKHumphreyObama]

50. He's taken a step in the right direction

Even if his vote was based more on inspiration than on values, it still says a lot about him that he was prepared to think outside the box and vote for a progressive Democratic candidate. That would be anathema to many Republicans. He sounds like a reasonable type. You can still differ on political issues and be friends

[Mudoria]

51. If you judge your friendships and relationships

based on party affiliations you need more help than posting on the internet can provide. :crazy:

[w8liftinglady]

52. most of the people i work with are republicans

I like most of them.We just leave politics out of the conversation.

[liam_laddie]

53. I've severed ties with at least two former friends...

based on their having voted for Bush twice and leaning McCain this year. These were long-standing... 20-year...friends; I consider them: 1)a one-issue(anti-abortion) Catholic and 2)a closet racist. I think of them as traitors, having been responsible for contributing, however minutely, by their votes, to the massive decline of the US in most almost all respects. No prison is bad enough for the outgoing administration heavies. There MUST be trials!
And there must be some way to negate the effect of the Federalist Society appointees poisoning the Appellate Courts.

[mudesi]

54. I cannot and will not associate with willfully ignorant people, period

Conservatives are willfully ignorant, psychologically damaged people.

Until they get the help they need and convert to liberalism, I have no use for them.

[Ishoutandscream2]

56. Shoot, I'm surrounded by them. I have no choice

In red hell, you just learn to get along.

[earth mom]

57. I reconnected with an old friend a year & a half ago only to find out she's a rethug.

We never talked politics in the past because I wasn't interested in politics until the * cabal took office which is right when she & I stopped speaking.

So when we started talking again, I was shocked to find out my friend is a rethug but she is smart enough to regret voting for * and is probably more of a libertarian than a rethug.

Her husband voted for McCain, and while I'm sure he has had an strong influence on her politics, she voted for Obama because that's who her kids wanted her to vote for even though she had reservations that Obama is too liberal.

Obama is NOT liberal enough for me which is one reason why I have stopped talking politics with her. I just feel really uncomfortable, because it's so damn easy to get angry & confrontive about the evil rethugs in power. :yoiks:

[tabasco]

58. Life's too short

to hang around with dumbasses.

[all.of.me]

59. My friendships are not based on politics.

I have Republican friends where we agree we disagree and don't talk about it. I have others where I don't even begin to go there. They all have such great qualities that I can't blow them off because they vote differently than I do. These people would bail me out of a bind in a split second. That is friendship, not a political party.

[sundog]

60. i don't think you can base a friendship entirely on political ideology

[Mari333]

61. hey when its your own mom you have to talk to her :) nt

[ElboRuum]

62. Republicans aren't all neocons.

Tis true that I've had to... ahem... vociferously end certain conversations with a very few of my friends and relatives on matters of politics because they were in fact neoconservatives or at least somehow buying into the Right-Wing-Noise-Factory, but I really don't have much of an issue with Republicans in general.

What I've found is that most Republicans are like us in many respects, in that they want things to get better, although we often differ on what better means or even if we agree on that, where the problem is in the first place or what to do about it. This is perfectly fine, because examining all aspects and sides of an issue is what politics is largely about. Neoconservatives don't want that and it is reflected in how they discuss what I loosely call "their politics". What neoconservative voters want is to be on the 'right' side of the issue, part of the big club, part of the majority view, so they can feel good about what they are, who they are, and what they believe. It's this me versus you attitude, this zero-sum equation, which makes more sense at a sporting event than in the realm of the perpetual grey area, that being politics, which makes them intractable. When was the last time you made a nearly impregnable point to one and had it conceded with something along the lines of "well, you may have a point there" or "I hadn't thought about it that way?" Seriously, have you ever? With a Republican who believes in what conservatism USED to be about, a well-formed and researched argument will be sufficient to convince and elicit such statements.

The trick to the whole thing is that the value in a person isn't limited to their political views, and when you are a politically interested and active person (and often a little obsessed by it as well), it is difficult sometimes to separate the value that a person otherwise has to you as a friend from their viewpoints. I look at it this way. My friends share my interests, if not my views. My friends have my back even if they may not support the same views I have and support. Are they stand up people? Do they have virtues such as honesty or custodianship of the people they care about? There is more to people than their position on taxation of capital gains, and we do ourselves a disservice by allowing particular viewpoints to obfuscate our view of that.

Political views are an important aspect of a person's character, but they are far and away not the only ones. If you can separate the person from the politics, it goes a long way, not only to maintaining peace within the relationship, but also to allowing you to see those with different political views as interesting and important to any conversation about what's right or wrong with our country, whether you agree or don't.

[Liberal_in_LA]

64. hardcore repubs don't want to be friends with Libs

[bertman]

65. Hell, I barely can maintain a relationship with my Republican FAMILY members and

long ago pissed off all the Republican acquaintances I had, so it's a moot point.

[fortyfeetunder]

67. It's possible to find common ground with those different from you.

I have several co-workers who are Republicans and we have a civil relationship. We have sought common ground on issues but do not get in ideological discussions.

Outside of work, my outlaws lean Republican so I don't discuss with them anything, what I say might be thrown back at me so I stick to topics like kids and the weather.... :)

[Manifestor_of_Light]

68. I don't stay friends with Repukes.

If they had rational arguments based on facts, I could have a civil discussion with them.

But they don't have facts. They have lies that they base their whole world view on.

Same thing with evangelical Jesus freak assholes. Nosy bastards can get out of my life. They are quite rude when they inquire about my church affiliation and try to convince me I should believe the way they do. It's none of their damn business.

Christians who mind their own business, I don't have a problem with them.

I cut Jesus freaks and Repukes out of my life. I don't need the high blood pressure they cause me.

[firedupdem]

69. I only knew one person that was a republican...he was my boss

when I lived in Michigan. Politics didn't come up too much and this was around September 11th when everybody was pretending to get along. Once the war started we had one rough conversation when I talked about how horrible all the killing was. He told me that dying was part of the job for the military and that's what they signed up for?! Sick Bastard.

Now I live in Nebraska and I don't live near the area Obama got the one electoral vote from. These fuckers are nuts. I can't go to the gym because they have FOX tv. on and even though I try not to look up at the screen it makes me sick! I've seen bumper stickers that say "Still voting Democrat, you're stuck on stupid". I wanted to ram the fucking car! They are rabid repubs. One lady doesn't talk to me anymore after she asked me what I thought of Palin. I hate living here.

Also, on my voter registration it under party is says -Democrat. Fucking idiots...It's the democratic party!!!!!!

[EFerrari]

70. I have nothing in common with those folks so there's no basis for a friendship.

[dorkulon]

71. If you like him, then of course you should be friends.

Not everyone has to agree with you about everything. If you can keep the political discussion civil, or at least limit it to friendly jibes, then go for it. I have at least a couple of friends who are libertarians, and we argue sometimes, but it's a friendly, academic sort of argument, and I find it enjoyable. You can attempt to persuade each other without being hostile about it, and there are other things to talk about anyway.

[LynnTheDem]

72. Life's too short.

Rightwing values are not my values; why would I want to be "friends" with someone stupid enough to vote against their own best interests and make the elite elite-er.

[NuttyFluffers]

73. they are trying at least. and not everything in life is life-or-death politics.

sometimes it's good to have friends, even if you don't always have the same exact outlook on life. i mean just look at the neurotic purity crusades that go on here bi-weekly. after things settle a bit we find that, yeah, we can still sorta hang as a community here (well, until the next purity crusade at least).

but then i'm a very lenient and forgiving person, for most things. outright cruelty and bigotry in action tends to make me unsympathetic though. has this friend been voting for the utter destruction of everything good in both of your worlds? do they gleefully cheer on the end of the world in some sort of sick anticipation of rapture and watching all their perceived 'enemies' getting 'justice' for not obeying their every whim? if so, then yeah, not exactly the type of person that is rewarding to hang out with.

basically, if you're in trouble, would they be there for you, no questions asked, no caveats given? then that is someone who can love unconditionally. they can look beyond ego and be a good friend, even if they are not very good at figuring out patterns in current events. there is potential in a person like that -- and really what more do we ask from people than do their best and forgive them for their human failings?

[spooky3]

107. bigotry against at least one group IS part of the value difference

in addition to the two votes for Bush, which he still is proud of.

[Number23]

74. Life is too short and the world is too small to be so narrow

Besides, I am much too curious about what makes folks/the world tick to dismiss entire groups of people because of their political affiliation or any other fairly meaningless label.

Hell, I once subscribed to a white supremacist newsletter out of Canada and I'm a black chick from Georgia. Fascinating (if cosmically laughable) stuff...

[eridani]

75. Discuss values you have in common instead of specific policies? n/t

[spooky3]

76. thanks for the additional replies

It's interesting that some people have judged others harshly here...for judging others based on their behavior. :-)

[Fading Captain]

80. There are times when it is frustrating

But I feel sorry for people who allow politics to destroy friendship.

[closeupready]

81. Party affiliation is one factor among many. And there are different kinds of Republicans.

Much as we like to bash them here, some of them do have integrity. But for many or most others, it's all about what agenda serves their selfish aims best, not what's good for the country or the world. If conversations veer in a political direction, and I can sense we are going to butt heads, I change the subject or excuse myself from the conversation.

But honestly, I would say that given a choice between a Dem and a puke, I would choose the dem 100% of the time. I wouldn't hang out here if Dem policies were unimportant to me, so why should it not matter on a personal level, as well? "the personal is political."

[deaniac21]

82. It should be illegal to be Republican.

[MsTryska]

84. I'm dating a republican

the election was rough on the relationship, and we broke up and I screamed on him. But he came back around - it definitely brough up the differences between us. At this point we don't talk politics - but his views, when he's not spouting garbage off the radio, tend to be pretty populist anyway. it's a challenge. I guess you have to ask yourself what else it is you liek about the person in question.

I liek my guy, despite his penchant for talk radio, so I'm willing to accomodate his beliefs - until he's a jackass, and then I jsut yell at him.

[Brgotn]

85. Repubicans are human, too.

Republicans are humans, too. I have Republican friends. It's part of "celebrating diversity". Not talking to a person because of their political affiliation would be hateful and contrary to Progressive ideals.

[Genevieve]

86. I can't -- Republican values (or should I say, "lack-of") are a deal-breaker for me. . nt

[Fire1]

89. I hear ya! We have nothing in common, plus, the ones I've

encountered are too stupid for me.

[spinbaby]

87. I'm married to a Republican

A Republican gun nut, no less. But he voted for Obama, so maybe he's not so much a Republican:-)

[Kaleva]

88. I'm apoilitical when it comes to friendships.

Scumbags and good folks cover the political spectrum.

[Naturyl]

90. I don't deal with Republicans or Libertarians.

I avoid contact with such people, whether they be former friends or family.

It may seem harsh, but so far I haven't had any complaints from them. They are in no rush to associate with a progressive, either.

[Brooklyns_Finest]

91. Sure

I have Republicans friends. What's the problem? I was in the military, you learn to enjoy the company of people with different views. Hell, I got friends who are jail birds and a few hardcore felons. It bees that ways sometimes :)

[cherokeeprogressive]

92. My social circle has remained essentially the same for about 35 years.

We met in elementary, jr, and sr. high school. We knew each other before we knew what politics was. Nothing has come between us yet, and I don't see anything coming between us in the future. I'm a lucky guy to have childhood friends that will spend their lives involved in mine, and politics is not something we discuss when we're partying or barbequing or camping or skiing or houseboatin' on the river.

I feel sorry for anyone who would deny their friends because of political affiliations.

Judging by some of the responses to this OP, certain folks here would be more comfortable at a website like ICanFindAReasonToHateANYONE.com and that's too bad.

[Flatulo]

95. It depends on how strongly you identify yourself by party affiliation.

I don't like labels like Liberal or Conservative, because people are far too complex to capture the whole spectrum of positions in just two buckets.

If you enjoy this person's company, than let the friendship blossom. Maybe you can persuade him/her to rethink some of their more objectionable positions.

One exception - I will not associate with bigots.

[Flatulo]

96. Delete - dupe.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

99. Republicans Are People Like Anyone Else. I'd Say Asking The Question The Way You Did Is More Of

an indication of your flawed character than theirs.

[pipi_k]

100. I have friends who are

all over the map, politically.

As long as we don't discuss things like religion and politics, things go swimmingly well.

:)

[timtom]

102. I'm sorry, but I keep anybody of that ilk at a distance.

[norepubsin08]

103. I have one republican friend

who is a life long friend and therefore I can't be accused of being close minded..also I always try to vote for one Republican on the ballot so I can consider myself open minded

[aikoaiko]

104. Who has perfect friends?

:shrug:

As long as there is mutual respect, a frienship is possible. But frankly, it sounds like you don't respect this person and, therefore, wouldn't make a good friend.

[santamargarita]

105. Never have had any and will have any Republican friends...

...If I smell Republican, that person gets instantly dismissed!

[johnlucas]

106. I have friends who are not of same political persuasion

The honest truth of the matter is that if you're looking for someone to associate with who looks at the world 100% like you do, then you will have no one to associate with. It could come down to sports teams or colas or brand of TV or who knows.

I don't like the Republican ideology but that doesn't mean I won't associate with any Republicans. Just agree to disagree and keep discussions about politics or religion or any contentious subject off the table while associating with them. If you DO discuss matters, set ground rules for discussion so as not to injure any friendships. Very simple.

Nobody has all the answers INCLUDING the Progressives. If you go down to Key West, don't ask for fried chicken. If you go to a Muslim country, don't ask for pork chops. If you go to India, don't ask for hamburgers. Some things just don't reconcile and you have to agree to disagree hopefully recognizing your common humanity in the process. Might just stop a few arguments...and wars.

Who am I kidding? What is a human being for if not for drama?
John Lucas

P.S.: Besides, the best way to settle a political debate is to place bets on it. If there's an impasse in a argument, tell them to put their money where their mouth is.

[Forkboy]

109. I have no use for them as friends.

To each their own.