So .... how long did it take for someone to greet Mr. Bristol, take him to get a suit, wait for ....

[Stinky The Clown]

..... the alterations, get him a haircut, take him back and shower him, dry him off, dress him, get him to make-up, and then get him xanaxed so he doesn't freak out while on national teevee?

[cobalt1999]

1. Don't forget the enlistment in the army.

That boy is gone ASAP.

[ColbertWatcher]

2. Hey , pit crews can change all the tires on a car in less than 30 seconds. n/t

[spindrifter]

3. They also had to pull the tongue out of his mouth.

[Zookeeper]

4. And what did they promise him? A new snowmobile?

His own monster truck? A Swiss bank account?

[Iris]

5. He can kill all the polar bears he wants.

[Zookeeper]

8. And give them to his new MIL for her next remodeling project? n/t

[Iris]

12. yes! Sort of a reverse dowry.

[dysfunctional press]

6. i wonder if that was tony's job today...boy THAT would be an uncomfortable limo ride.

nt

[amandabeech]

7. Dupe. sorry.

[amandabeech]

9. Dupe.

[amandabeech]

10. Forget the Xanax. Just give that man a case of Bud!! n/t

[Ellen Forradalom]

11. Oh that poor kid

Five months ago canoodling with a girl in a small Alaska town, now catapulted to the front page of the New York Times.

What crazy times we live in.

[Iris]

13. too bad he didn't have time to grow a goatee like his future f-i-l

[flstci]

14. I know, right. N/T

.

[NNN0LHI]

15. If that was my son there wouldn't be any marriage until a paternity test proved he was the daddy

Take that to the bank.

Don

[flstci]

16. Kind of hard to do when ....

they are of consenting age. I would hope I could get my son to take a paternity test too but he could well tell me where to stick my paternity test and that would be that.

[Iris]

17. I have a feeling this kid would be HAPPY for his parents to intervene in a way

that would ensure he is not just being used as a pawn by the Republican party.

[NNN0LHI]

18. Telling me where to stick my paternity test wouldn't be the last word

Not when I am still in charge of who I decide to leave everything to in my will.

I certainly would not want my stuff to go to someone else's kid.

Don

[Spike89]

19. Be real, huge opportunity for this kid

He's a high school dropout from a small town in Alaska with almost no prospects and he's given a chance to hitch himself to potentially the 1st family. You're seriously portraying this as a bad financial move on his part? Really? It isn't as if by marrying this girl he'll end up making burgers at McDonalds, on the other hand, refuse and the least of his worries would be finding the money to pay child support.

I'm not saying it is right to coerce him with the money, but of all the people in this sorry saga, he is maybe the one getting off the easiest.

[NNN0LHI]

21. Palin sent her own son to Iraq so where do you think this boy is headed soon?

Any guesses?

Don

[hunter]

22. Like he won the lottery, man!

If he plays this right he might someday be a Republican Presidential candidate. If he doesn't they'll find him dead in some ditch in Afghanistan.

[Bake]

20. I don't know about you, H2S

But if that had been MY daughter, that punk-ass motherfucker would be one dead redneck.

Bake