My soon-to-be ex son in law tried to commit suicide today.

[flamin lib]

Took 150 Tylenol PM tabs and a six pack of beer. My guess is he was unconscious for 10-12 hours before being found. Breathing but completely un-responsive. He's in ICU now and prognosis is guarded pending the condition of his liver when he gets de-toxed. Don't expect him to regain consciousness for a day or two.

The story of his demise is far too long to relate here but he and my daughter lost a house, a car, four jobs and there were no prospects for a recovery on the horizon. He was basically two months away from living under a bridge and the only prospects my girl has for work are out of state which means losing custody of his two sons.

Just had to tell somebody while I'm "being strong" for them.

[grasswire]

1. wow

Were they in the process of divorce? What will her responsibilities be to him?

[mrreowwr_kittty]

Oh god I'm so sorry about that. I hope your daughter and grandkids are okay.

Suicides go up exponentially in times like these. I fear your family's experience is being repeated across the country. :cry:

[The Stranger]

24. And here I was hoping the guy who took the 150 Tylenols is okay.

:shrug:

[mrreowwr_kittty]

29. Am I wrong for thinking about the family that was affected? Was your reply even necessary?

[The Stranger]

67. It seems a little misplaced. Someone is suffering from depression to the point of suicide, and the

only thing you are worried about is his relatives?

They may be part of the reason for his suicide attempt.

[bobbolink]

89. You have some very good points to your reply. It's just not the popular thought in this

society.

We insist on blaming the victim.

NONE of us know all that is happening, here, so I hope that your words get a second thought, and some consideration.

I thank you for your compassion!!

:pals:

[easttexaslefty]

137. Suicide hurts everyone

It's not about blame. I don't blame anyone who ends his life. But I do know what it does to families and that's far from pretty

[bobbolink]

142. Not to mention what it does to the one who couldn't live anymore.

Sometimes it was the family who needed to LISTEN before it came to that.

But this really doesn't belong in a thread of a person involved.

I just ask you to not continue with assumptions and stereotypes.

[easttexaslefty]

145. I have no assumptions and stereotypes, I have a dead son

[bobbolink]

146. I'm very sorry to hear that. I lost a son, also.

We still can't make assumptions for others.

[easttexaslefty]

149. I'm not making assumptions for anyone

in speak from my own experience as do you

[mrreowwr_kittty]

166. His CHILDREN??!?

"You know Bobby and Suzie, Daddy might not have tried to off himself if he didn't have to worry about supporting the two of you."

:puke:

[cornermouse]

2. Sometimes words just don't get the job done.

:hug: Keep hanging in there. They need you.

[Donnachaidh]

3. Many of us are getting close to that level too

And having to be *strong* while the rugs being pulled out from under you is hellish at best.

Remember to take care of yourself, too.

[reggie the dog]

43. sell drugs

that is what poor people in the ghetto have been doing for decades to stay above water. Sell drugs or be a pimp. Or steal. Yippie, gen xers born middle class get to look forward to living dirt poor.... but seriously, grow and sell cannabis or get into the big money in cocaine. Fuck it right, you are about to lose everything anyway.

[Beacool]

69. What kind of constructive advice is that?????

Or were you trying to be funny?

:-(

[Lilith Velkor]

78. Realistic

but there's a possibility rtd was being darkly humorous.

[Beacool]

79. Well, I sure hope so..............

:eyes:

[reggie the dog]

122. darkly realistic

the tv show weeds is about selling grass to preserve a middle class lifestyle. Look in the ghettos of any city of the USA and you will find many people working in the illegal markets AS THEIR ONLY MEANS TO SURVIVE. It is not constuctive advice, it is a sad statement about the middle class coming to face the same economic reality that poor people have known since the early 80's. When you are fucked and have no money and are about to lose your home ways of coming into money that seemed far off limits before suddenly do not seem so bad. Along with an increase in suicide and drug use economic hardship brings increase in black market money like growing and selling grass, making meth/MDMA and selling it, outright thievery or robbery etc. Most of us memebers of the middle class now see no use in selling drugs even to supplement our incomes because the risks outweigh the benefits, start threating us with living in our cars or on the street and the benefits of a roof and food will outweigh the risk of jail. Personally I would rather work a job to pay the bills, but when 50 or even 60 hours a week will not cut it I will find money somehow. Since I believe drug trade involves no victims unlike robbery I would likely grown and sell cannabis if pushed to the brink of losing my home. Like I said look at the economic opprotunities of the ghettos across the USA and you will see that this system is in place and has been so for a long time. In other words, welcome to the ghetto life fellow middle classers (unless you are rich or in the upper middle class, then you will be ok you will just live in apartments or smaller houses.

[Lilith Velkor]

151. Don't forget sex work

Some of my best friends are hookers.

[Beacool]

160. Seriously?????????

I have no moral judgment to make, but these women concern me. They are so vulnerable to abuse from their pimps and their customers, not to say of the STDs that they can pick up from one of them.

I have thought for a long time that prostitution should be legalized. It works great in some countries in Europe. Women are legally protected and so is society because condoms are mandatory and they receive regular doctor's visits to prevent the spread of STDs.

I know it'll never happen here, were are too hypocritical. As a society we have an adolescent attitude toward sex and nudity.

[Lilith Velkor]

162. Yup.

They aren't women. But still.

[Beacool]

164. Oops.......

You said prostitution and I immediately assumed that your friends were women. Well, ditto for the men. They get abused too. I had a friend stay with me for 6 months once because his then boyfriend had beaten the crap out of him and he was afraid. So he left him his Apt. in Manhattan and moved in with me until he could afford to sign another lease.

:eyes:

[Donnachaidh]

161. LOL -- I'd have customers right next door

New kids moved in to the apartment next to us. And they leave their windows open 24 hours a day. Every night I get a huge whiff of marijuana from their apartment. I may just go and tell them to close their windows, because there is a police officer living in another part of the building.

I here ya on *do what you have to do*. It's the slow drip drip drip of waiting to see the pink slip you know is coming that is driving us crazy.

[medeak]

4. thinking good thoughts

had patient with the same overdose who detoxed through lungs...and was fine. Be strong for them and know you have friends here! (((hugs)))

[Bunny]

5. That;'s so sad. It's good that you are there for them.

:hug:

[Saturday]

6. Sorry to hear this. Thinking of you and yours. nt

[PerfectSage]

7. I'm so sorry for you and your family.

Be Strong! :grouphug:

[Rick Myers]

8. Stay strong!

Take care for your daughter and the kids...

:hug:

[Smarmie Doofus]

9. Jeeeessus. Awful.

>>>>Just had to tell somebody while I'm "being strong" for them.>>>>

We're interested so keep us posted.

[EFerrari]

10. (((((((((((((((Your Family)))))))))))))))))))

:hug:

:grouphug:

[pleah]

11. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.

:hug:

[madaboutharry]

12. I am so sorry.

I don't know what else to say.

[leftofthedial]

13. I'm sorry for your family

sounds like an all-too-familiar story in today's America.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

14. And now he'll have to worry about finding a kidney donor.

That sucks.

[uppityperson]

39. ODing on Tylenol gets your liver. Ibuprofen gets kidneys.

The whole thing sucks.

[Junkdrawer]

41. Actually, I work for a major organ transplant department and there were...

several Tylenol-suicide-kidney-transplants in the past few months.

[uppityperson]

42. I didn't know that. Thank you. Hadn't heard of those. I was wrong. eom

[TheFriendlyAnarchist]

68. Not completely. That much alcohol and AP WILL shoot your liver to hell.

That's part of the problem with using it to overdose; if you regain consciousness, you may not be out of the woods until its determined how your liver is.

It's a terrible situation all over though :hug:

[Meshuga]

15. Why is he a "soon-to-be ex son in law "?

What a situation. I feel terrible for the children because besides the hardship and separation that they have to deal with, their dad attempts to commit suicide. Hang in there! :-(

[Catherina]

16. I'm so sorry. I hope better days kick in soon for them.

:hugs:

[Maestro]

17. I am so sorry.

First and foremost I hope he fully recovers and secondly I wish him the best of luck trying to land a new, stable and steady job.

[tularetom]

18. Jesus that's terrible

Wishin good karma for you and your family.

[mahina]

19. Good luck FL,

so sorry to hear that. We lost a great friend recently to suicide here because he just couldn't make it, and couldn't ask for help. Never even said there was a problem- we all thought he was doing fine.

Hearts here are with you and your fam.

[bobbolink]

90. "and couldn't ask for help". *IS* there "help" ? Really?

Just remember, please--- those who "ask for help" often get slapped down and demeaned.

"we all thought he was doing fine."

Yup, because when someone asks "HOw are you?" and you say "Not so good" or something to that effect, then you get the criticism.

It's a no-win.

[easttexaslefty]

136. Hey bobolink

I always read and appreciate your posts. My son suicided 9 months ago and no, he never asked for help. we had always been there for him through thick or thin and anyone of his friends would have given him the shirts off their backs, as he did for them. And yes, we all thought he was doing fine.I believe he was ashamed, embarrassed and just not thinking straight

[bobbolink]

152. Many years ago, I had a friend who did the same. I was so angry with him for so long....

...."If he had just given us a chance"....

BUT, I realized later that we weren't all that great at responding then. Who knows if just knowing we cared would have helped him.

I'm certain that being chained in a hospital WOULDN"T have helped him.

Another friend seriously attempted in October. He, also, didn't let others know how badly he felt. When we spoke about it, it was the same thing.... people pontificate, sermonize, etc.

I hesitate to say much, because you have your pain (which I acknowledged), and that is sacred and I wouldn't tramp on that for anything.

BUT... the fact is, we as human beings in this country MUST come to grips with the lousy way we talk to others, and DON'T LISTEN.

Another friend's son recently committed suicide, and her son is really torn up. He is angry with the dead friend, and she reminded him... "When he called and wanted to talk to you, you were too busy, remember?" She laid it out... life is short, people need us, and turning our backs can have consequences. It is a no-no to think like this in this society, but she is RIGHT. It's so much easier to say "mental illness" and brush it off. BUT, that is just like blaming us homeless folk for being homeless... it may may you (the collective "you") feel better for now, but... keeps the problem going.

WE ALL need to take a good, long look at why so many people are so desperate and need an end to the pain that they are killing themselves. We NEED to be HONEST. We need to LISTEN.

I just bought a book about active listening. A woman here just told me that she wanted me to teach her how to listen. Yet, she resists. So, I bought the book. It's really not all that difficult, and could help so much, but we just don't want to be bothered.

How many will it take?

I'm in the same boat, and have no illusions that anyone will care. That's the state of this society.

We're a mess.

[mahina]

158. Um, no, actually, we don't do that. Thanks though.

[AuntPatsy]

20. I'm very sorry to hear this, all you can do is be a shoulder for your daughter and your

grandchildren, ultimately, choices will have to be made and it might get even harder, at least your daughter has you to lean on..we all need such sometime in our lives..hang in there..

[spanone]

21. damn, sorry.....light

:grouphug:

[nadinbrzezinski]

22. You are ok there? and realize there is little you could have done

or your daughter could have done

DO NOT, under any circumstances, blame yourselves

And I can understand why the prognosis is guarded... tylenol in those dosages tend to shut down the liver

[babylonsister]

23. Wow, flamin lib, all I can offer is positive thoughts. I'm glad

you're there for them, and us for you. :hug:

[pacalo]

25. Wish I could give you a hug.

Do what you can for them, but try not to consume yourself with problems over which you have no control.

Take care :hug: .

[Ichingcarpenter]

26. Wow, Don't know what to say except

it sounds like an all around real bummer but you have my support.

[easttexaslefty]

27. I am so, so sorry

I will have your family in my thoughts.....

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

28. There is so much of this going on.

I sit here and listen to my police scanner, which recieves all over northwest and central west NJ and Eastern PA out to Allentown. There is so much of this happening. A huge spike in successful suicides. An even bigger spike in attempted suicides. Drug overdoses, with Heroin the clear leader, but prescription medications and Tylenol coming up fast.

There is something bad wrong in this society and our media does not have the guts to recognize it or report on it, cowards and lickspittles that they are.

And if anyone reading this has suicidal ideations of their own: don't do it. Fight. Fight the bastards to your last dying breath. Fight them tooth, fang and claw. You might not win, but you will leave them maimed and wounded. But just fight. Do not give the pricks the satisfaction of you giving up and giving in. They may win, but exact a horrible, terrible price for that win.

I know of what I speak.

[Name removed]

44. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[LiberalEsto]

72. Amen to that, TS!

People have got to realize that their joblessness is NOT THEIR FAULT.

It's the fault of these vicious corporate CEOs who give themselves bigger and bigger raises every year while laying off the "little people" to make the company's stock prices go higher. It's the fault of this evil Misadministration that caters to the rich and powerful, while leaving the middle class and poor to flounder on their own. It's the fault of this entire rotten robber baron system.

Once people realize this, maybe they can stop beating up on themselves and direct their anger at those responsible for their situations. They can do campaign work and help get decent people elected to Congress.

That said, my sympathy to Flamin Lib and everyone affected by this sad event. I hope things eventually work out for the best for all of you.

[bobbolink]

92. "don't do it. Fight. Fight the bastards to your last dying breath."

And be criticized as "too angry", be ostracized and all that other punishing stuff.

We aren't all cut out of the same cloth.

The enemy is our rugged individualism... until we ALL start learning how to understand people who are hurting, and STAND. WITH. THEM., this will continue.

Telling them what to do and blaming them doesn't change anything.

Just adds more guilt.

[easttexaslefty]

139. Who cares if we are criticized as "too angry"

I could give a crap about what others think of me. Sometimes even people that have someone standing beside them suicide. Enormous consequences result. You are right blaming doesn't change anything in either direction. Education does. The ones who live with the guilt is not the suicide,,,it's the friends and family

[bobbolink]

143. CLUE... constant criticism kills.

[easttexaslefty]

147. You seem to be the one criticizing

[bobbolink]

165. Good projection. You came on guns blazing.

[Joe Chi Minh]

144. It ill behoves people responsible for angering God beyond all measure,

to criticise mortal men and women for feeling angry at them on same account.

It puts me in mind of that hilarious admonishment of Ahaz, the King of Judah, by God, as reported by the prophet, Isiah, when he refused to obey the Angel of the Lord's command to ask God for a sign:

"10 Then the LORD spoke again to Ahaz, saying, 11 “Ask a sign for yourself from the LORD your God; make it deep as Sheol or high as heaven.” 12 But Ahaz said, “I will not ask, nor will I test the LORD!” 13 Then he said, “Listen now, O house of David! Is it too slight a thing for you to try the patience of men, that you will try the patience of my God as well?"

The last Republicans standing show precisely the same sanctimonious incomprehension as Ahab did! Thick as two short planks. As well as causing the outrage in the first place, they have the gall to complain at the response of the victims of it...

[sonias]

30. I'm so sorry to hear that flamin lib

I can hear the desperation in his story as well as yours. What a horrible time.

I know it's hard to stay strong, but I know you have to as well. You put your best strong face on for them. They need you.

:hug:


Sonia

[lonestarnot]

31. Baby we need some community bridges!

Hang tough. :hug:

[Stinky The Clown]

32. No words ..... just ........

:hug:

[malaise]

33. Too sad

Stay strong. :grouphug:

[GCP]

34. The poor man

I'm so sorry to hear this.

[bobbolink]

93. Yes. The pain is overwhelming, and isn't going to stop with this.

:cry:

Thank you for your compassion--it's much appreciated.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

35. My dear flamin lib...

Oh, sweetie...

Big hugs to you for "being strong..."

I sure hope he'll be OK...

Vibes for your daughter and grandchildren too...

We've got your back!

:hug: :hug:

[PerfectSage]

36. Liver detoxifying article. I take bentonite clay as a detoxifier. Good luck. Hope this helps.

http://www.healingdaily.com/liver-detoxification.htm

[Arctic Dave]

37. T&P's brother. n/t

[yurbud]

38. email that to your congress people and obama, & ask them what they are doing to give this guy hope.

[uppityperson]

40. Oh damn. I am so sorry, hoping the best for him, and your daughter, kids, you.

[hokies4ever]

45. It is a miracle that he's still alive

Tylenol overdoses are usually fatal because they are very damaging to the liver. Even if he has permanent liver damage, you should look at this as a half glass full situation because it's a miracle that he is still alive.

[nashville_brook]

46. big hugs.

i bet this story is much larger than a "simple" suicide attempt. i am so sorry for the difficulties you and your family are facing right now. please hang in there, and continue to reach out for support.

[seabeyond]

47. that is sad. very sad. to be hopeless like that.

my heart goes out to him and his.....

my mom committed suicide. and such a wastethe grandkids she will never receive joy from and they will only know her from stories. and grand and fun stories they are. and could have been if she had stuck around

[flamin lib]

48. Update on SIL's condition.

First blood tests indicate no major liver or kidney damage. He was strong and healthy going in and that has helped a lot.

His diaphragm is "over breathing" the respirator so that much is looking positive.

They are using activated charcoal to purge his lungs and other drugs to purge his blood stream.

The current plan is to keep him unconscious until his diaphragm returns to full strength.

The prognosis is guardedly positive.

[Habibi]

50. Thanks for the update, FL.

I will keep your family in my thoughts. May all be well for you and yours.

[backscatter712]

52. Good to hear.

Tylenol + alcohol is a bad way to check out - very unpleasant way to go.

I hope things are better for you, your family and him soon.

[bobbolink]

94. Are there any good ways?

Unless/until we ALL develop strong community, there will be many of us who can't continue.

[knitter4democracy]

54. He's damn lucky.

Well, at least until the medical bills hit. Damn. That's all so bad.

A few years back, Hubby's youngest sister tried to commit suicide and couple of times. It just freezes you heart when you hear of it. Hurts, too.

[bobbolink]

95. Oh, yes. VERY lucky.

The very luckiest try to kill themselves.

[knitter4democracy]

106. No, I mean he's lucky that the liver isn't permanently damaged.

If you'd read my post about almost losing my husband's sister when she was in high school to suicide, you'd have seen it's not funny to me.

[bobbolink]

112. NONE of us know HIM. Or what is going on with HIM. We can't project OUR history onto him.

MANY people who make a serious attempt are VERY angry at surviving, and will keep trying until they succeed.

There is no LUCK in that.

[knitter4democracy]

115. No, there is no luck in that.

Liver damage/failure and kidney damage/failure are extremely painful, though, and hard to treat while they're painful. Even if he does decide that he is mad he survived and wants to try again, I would hope he would at least not suffer in the meantime. I was merely saying that he was lucky in that he wasn't going to deal with horrendous physical pain and possible surgery on top of the emotional and mental pain he's obviously fighting.

[bobbolink]

133. I, too, wish that none of us would suffer. Since these money things aren't

going to be resovled, and homelessness is of no interest, then it's damned time the population recognized that they are causing death, and provide us with a non-suffering means to leave.

It's only reasonable.

From another one who tried.

And failed. As in everything. Failed.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

57. Good news, my dear flamin lib...

I continue to hold him, and all of you, in my heart...:grouphug:

[Eurobabe]

74. Hope he continues to fight it

and hope things turn out OK for your daughter and her family. :hug:

[yardwork]

84. Sending good thoughts to you and your family.

I hope that he pulls through and that things get better. So sorry.

[applegrove]

49. That is really harsh. Vibes to your family.

[mrs_p]

51. so sorry

i hope that there is some peace for him and your entire family

[Jazzgirl]

53. I am so sorry for you.

My brother just got back from Iraq. His 17 year old daughter tried to commit suicide. He was really concerned about the Tylenol because he said very few people that OD on tylenol recover. It is not that common because of severe liver damage. Fortunately, my niece didn't take tylenol. That would have been devastating for him and everybody. I hope he didn't really take 150.

[JerseygirlCT]

55. Oh I'm so sorry. It's a horrible thing that people are being driven

to acts of desperation like that.

[elizfeelinggreat]

56. It's hard

to "be strong". I wish you and your family well.

Be kind to yourself and take extra care.

[Maraya1969]

58. A hug for strength.

:hug:

[SammyWinstonJack]

59. delete

[eridani]

60. Wonder if they would have broken up at all without the economic stress n/t

[proud patriot]

127. it's the biggest stress My marriage faces

Come to think of it , if we fight it usually starts with
worries about money .

[Bennyboy]

61. Wow, so sorry for you and your family.........

Unfortunatley, this is going to be happening a lot more as we go deeper into the abyss. I myself have had five friends that have killed themselves in the last two years. Same stroy,lose the job, lose everything, Hopeless. I have just been hanging on myself and really am not sure day to day if I want to continue.

This is what I have been saying. Before there was always hope for the future no matter how bleak the now was.

But that has changed. totally changed.

[Beacool]

75. Listen Benny, do not think like that!!!

I'm very sorry that your friends decided to terminate their lives, but don't you even think that it's the solution.

Life is too precious and worth living despite its difficulties. What can be so terrible? Girlfriend dumped you? There are plenty of women out there. Lost your job? Something always comes down the pike. Lost a loved one? I'm sure that person wouldn't want you to die before your time.

Take one problem at a time and try to deal with just that one issue, then move on to the next. Also, rely on those around you who lift you up. A supportive family member or a friend who makes you laugh. Stay away from people who are downers, they won't help to make you feel better and may even aggravate the situation.

Above all, have faith in yourself. You are worth it, believe it!!!!. Buck up and you'll see how things WILL get better.

When I get upset, I keep repeating to myself "This too shall pass, this too shall pass." Well, guess what? It usually does.

Take care!!!

[Lilith Velkor]

80. "Stay away from people who are downers"

That attitude causes a lot of suicides. You have no idea how tiring it is to have to pretend to be happy all the time. Being around someone who is dealing with the same thing can help a lot.

[EOTE]

83. Amen to that!

I'm rarely a few steps above miserable at work, and just the simple act of smiling sometimes can be exhausting. Having someone around I didn't have to be fake with would be the ultimate relief.

[Beacool]

88. I'm not saying to pretend to be happy,

but it helps to be around people who make you laugh and temporarily forget your problems. After a good laugh one can sometimes see things in perspective and realize that life is not too bad after all.

[Lilith Velkor]

154. It is for some

but it can still be funny. Like the Daily Show.

[Beacool]

159. I know that it is,

but the human spirit is resilient. I've seen some horrendous things in some countries. Women who were repeatedly raped by the winners of some foul war and held captive for weeks or months as sex slaves. Women who got pregnant by these beasts, saw their babies killed and who in many cases ended up with AIDS. But their need to survive superseded all of these horrors and, even though they'll never forget their ordeal, there is now hope for a better life thanks to people who cared enough for them to come to their aid.

We should never give up on life, every person is valuable.

[bobbolink]

98. Thank goddess for your understanding and compassion.

I wish we were a society of people like you.

We wouldn't be in the fix we're in.

Thank you.

[Lilith Velkor]

155. Wow

That means a lot to me.

You are quite welcome.

:loveya:

[JVS]

105. I don't view a person who is down as a downer. A downer is a person who brings/puts you down.

Sympatizing with a friend is a lot different than tolerating someone who chaps your ass.

[reggie the dog]

132. I could not agree more with your comment

acting like we are happy makes it worse when we are sad. I am so lucky that I have not been depressed for a decade now.

[Lilith Velkor]

157. Yes you are.

Me, notsomuch. I tried all the pills, and the results ranged from panic attacks to psychosis. I figured I was better off just being depressed.

Oddly enough, the depression doesn't bother me as much now. It's just a thing, like having a bum leg or something like that.

[Bennyboy]

82. Thanks for the kind words.......

But... My problem right now is I have no one at all. My family is my problem. my friends live a long ways away. my body is broken down. No money, no girl. It just goes on and on and on. Everyday is a struggle. But I persevere. I had a goal and even that was taken from me last night. So now, the one thing that I look forward too, the one thing that gets me off, gets me closer to my friends, is now gone.
So now all I ahve to look forward too is more madness from my parents. Anotehr fight, Another blow up.

[Beacool]

96. You are welcome!

Listen, I don't want to sound like Pollyanna, there are times in my life when everything seemed to go wrong but you just can't give up on yourself.

For one thing, you are on this board talking to people, some may be LW nut cases (kidding....), but there are still human beings behind the keyboards and most won't mind listening to you.

Devise a plan and put it in writing, sort of like a business plan. List the issues that concern you more in order of importance and then work out various ways of resolving them.

If it's family, figure out a way to distance yourself from the worst offenders (unless you happen to live with them and then it becomes more difficult for obvious reasons). Since you mentioned your parents, I assume that you're relatively young. Don't do anything crazy, you WILL have a future you just have to have trust in yourself.

If work is the priority, brush up on your resume and hit the pavement. Even if at first you don't find the ideal gig, any job will help to pay the bills.

I don't know which was your goal, but can you try pursuing it at a later date from a different angle?

As for not having a girl, come on, be resourceful. Go out to a club, bar or wherever the girls in your town hangout and start a conversation.

Remember Churchill's words: never give in, never give up!!!!!!!!

:hi:

[Leftist Agitator]

118. Well meaning idiocy...

...is still idiocy.

:eyes:

[bobbolink]

97. Yes, telling people what to think and what to feel solves it all.

Authoritarianism solves everything.

[JVS]

103. Absolutely right!

[yardwork]

86. Please take care of yourself. You are loved.

[Name removed]

62. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[shireen]

63. sad and angry

sad for yout family.

angry about the economic conditions that created their situations ... brought about by those sick cruel "pro-family" republican thugs.

my thoughts and good wishes are with you and your family, flamin lib

:hug:

[eilen]

64. Stay strong

I'm sending vibes to your son in law. I hope he can consider moving to the same town as his ex/kids --maybe he can find a job out there too and be able to have a relationship with his kids. Sometimes it is worth working together even though you are divorced to maintain those relationships.

I'm also sending vibes out to your daughter and grandkids. What a horrible way to lose a parent. I'm glad he is improving. We sometimes would see this in the hospital. That guy needs a double helping of hope and inspiration.

[Hekate]

65. Oh god. Please, please tell him how much his kids need him to be alive...

I know your daughter is rowing them to hoped-for safety in a lifeboat, but they need to know their dad is still there for them even if he can't be with them in person.

Take care of yourself, so you can take care of others, FL. :hug:

Hekate

[bobbolink]

99. Yes, more responsibility and more guilt are sure to do the trick.

:eyes:

[Hekate]

109. I was once that mom in a lifeboat, Bobbolink. My alcoholic ex & his crashing business...

... were things I had to get the kids and me out from under, and I went to work at a gloriously underpaid secretarial job so I could stay in the area. There was no family house to lose. There was no emotional or financial support from anyone.

He moved away. He hit bottom. But the thing that anchored him to this Earth were his kids -- and they NEEDED him. He needed THEM. No matter what, he came out for one day every two weeks, and that has continued for nearly 30 years.

Responsibility and guilt my ass. Love and a reason to stay on this Earth is more like it.

Hekate

[bobbolink]

111. I hear your anger. I hope you can hear mine.

?

[Hekate]

116. Not anger, grief for FL's family. They all need a lifeline tossed to them about now

Son in law, daughter, kids, FL -- this is devastation on top of devastation. I feel grief.

Hekate

[bobbolink]

134. And I feel for the one who wanted to die.

[easttexaslefty]

140. me too

I feel more sorry than you could ever know that son in a flash of panic wanted to die. I also feel for me his mom and his dad and his stepdad and his brither and my extended family and all of Danny's friends. there's plenty of feeling to go around

[bobbolink]

141. NONE of us know that it was "a flash in a panic"

Those are the assumptions that lead to more deaths.

[easttexaslefty]

148. No your right, but the psychological autopsy done one him pretty

much concluded the same

[bobbolink]

153. You know the OP's soon to be ex-son-in-law?

He didn't mention that...

[easttexaslefty]

163. No, I'm speaking from my experience once again

[bobbolink]

167. And I was speaking of the OP.

I think you're too close to your own pain to understand what it may be like for others.

There's no point to continuing this.. you won't like anything I say, and can't seem to understand the pain I feel although you want understanding for your pain.

Good luck to you, and I hope you can heal.

bye now...

[katerinasmommy]

131. Brava!

And YEAH some guilt in there too. You bring a kid into the world, you are RESPONSIBLE for them. That is MORE important than your life, or, frankly, even your happiness. If you have a child, check out on your OWN time, right now, you got a job to do.


And when I hear talk that's not so, that's when I show MY anger.

[raccoon]

66. Sorry to hear this, flamin.

My thoughts will be with you and your family.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Love Bug]

70. How awful. What a heavy load they have had.

This can't be easy for your daughter, either, knowing her ex is in such sorry shape emotionally and physically. I hope his liver is ok, but from what I've heard about what the combination of Tylenol and alcohol can do, it would seem he knew what he was doing.

Peace and strength to you in the coming days lib as you are there for your daughter and grandkids.

[Midlodemocrat]

71. Wow. I'm so very sorry for all of you.

Hope he recovers fully and things look up for them.

You're wonderful for being so strong for everyone. :hug:

[windoe]

73. Kick for visibility, remember you are not alone.

:hug: you will meet others who have gone through the same thing, that is for sure. Maybe he will meet others who have survived this and talk with them.

[LeftishBrit]

76. I am so sorry; how awful!

My very best wishes for his full physical and mental recovery!

[Beacool]

77. I'm so sorry Flamin!!!!!

It seems that your son in law was at the end of his rope. I sincerely hope that he recovers and doesn't have permanent liver damage. Like everyone else said, Tylenol and alcohol are a bad combination.

I wish that people would see that even when things may seem at their worse, there's always a way out. I can understand the devastation of losing one's source of income and one's home, but dying is not the solution. For example, since it seems that he doesn't have a job, why not also move out of state to be near his kids? Heck, he might as well try it now that he doesn't have much else to lose. I know people who have lost almost everything, and after the initial shock, they say that it was kind of liberating because they could start anew from the ground up.

Stay positive, things will get better for your family!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours.

[Lilith Velkor]

81. Sorry for your troubles.

:hug:

[librechik]

85. Tylenol is the worst.

when they bring these victims in to the emergency room, the nurses just shake their heads. It destroys the liver, leading to a long, lingering, often painful, death. maybe he didn't take enough to do the job, but it sounds like he may have.

blessings

[bobbolink]

100. So if we're going to drive people to this "solution", then we need to provide

better, more humane, exit strategies.

[librechik]

104. agree --just scared by how callous the pharma and hospital folks are

how many people who didn't quite need euthanasia will be dying by mistake? I'm in favor for the terminally ill to be able to choose their time and manner of death--we just have to be very very careful.

This guy has apparently survived (see update from OP in separate thread)--Hope he gets better treatment in the future.

[bobbolink]

110. I'm not talking about "terminally ill". I'm talking about those of us who are BEING

DRIVEN to get rid of ourselves, because this country has ACCEPTED homelessness, then condems and criminalizes us.

THAT is the way to get rid of people.

SO, you want us gone? Fine. Provide us with the means so we don't have to suffer.

Time to face the hard facts of the decisions that WE are making.

[librechik]

119. can't blame you for your anger--the homeless are really getting shafted

Take it easy on yourself and the world, though. Drifting into mental illness won't help you or anybody. Get some assistance. Try Catholic Relief, they're very effective where I live.

[bobbolink]

135. Oh FUCK!

Mental illness... FUCK THAT SHIT!!

Get over yourself... people are HURTING.

HURTING TO THE POINT WHERE THEY DON"T WANT TO LIVE.

Keep repeating the same old "get help" shit, so more will die.

DAMN!


FUCK!!!

[librechik]

138. didn't mean to offend. Good luck. n/t

[Liberty Belle]

87. SAM-e reverses liver damage from drugs. Trust me.

I edit a nutrition journal and was amazed at scientific clinical results on this supplement, available at any good health food store. Clinicals show it's the first substance known to man to actually reverse liver damage from alcohol and drugs. Sadly most doctors don't yet know about this lifesaving cure.

I recommended it to a friend diagnosed with end-stage hepatitis C.
Her doctor was skeptical, but she tried it. Her Hep-C went into complete remission as her liver healed. Doc called it a miracle and now uses it on all his patients.

Even the MayoClinic site now lists this as "possibly helpful" for drug-induced liver damage.

I would urge the doctors to give it a try. If you do, get a good name brand - not a cheap knock-off.

[bobbolink]

101. Thank you for the good information. Excellent.

"If you do, get a good name brand - not a cheap knock-off."

Of course, if he had had the money for the "Good" things he needed, he probably wouldn't have been in that situation to begin with, right?

[wildbilln864]

91. stay strong. nt

:hug:

[Jack Rabbit]

102. ( )

.

[bdamomma]

107. I am so sorry for your son in law and daughter.

[mnhtnbb]

108. Geez. flamin, I'm so sorry. You know we wish we could do something

more than give you cyber-hugs!

:hug:

[bobbolink]

113. There are lots of things we could be doing.

But they aren't popular.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

114. You and your family are in my thoughts

This damned maladministration and its damned policies which hurt people like this. They can all go straight to hell - but I wish they'd be held accountable in this life.

[mzmolly]

117. I'm so very

sorry.

[AngryOldDem]

120. My thoughts are with you. n/t

[roguevalley]

121. I send you love and hugs. I don't know much else to do but I wish

you and yours luck and hope.

[Iwillnevergiveup]

123. Perhaps the best outcome

will come after this latest positive physical update. Undoubtedly, your son-in-law will be referred to a staff social worker who can work with him to deal with his total life situation by situation and stressor by stressor. There are people who can and will help beyond this crisis, and hopefully, he'll be directed to them post haste.

As for you, Flamin Lib, it's good you shared this because it's touched us all. And we're pulling for you and your family.

[RainDog]

124. I understand where you and your daughter are at right now.

My ex had (and has) a very good job, but he is bipolar (like his dad.) He drank to hide his illness. He had to stop drinking and when he did, he started cycling thru depression and mania. He had few if any coping strategies for things past and ongoing at the time, not to mention the physical issues of manic/depression. When our son was 9 mos old, he tried to kill himself for the first time with an overdose of medications and alcohol.. enough alcohol to poison himself, in fact. While we were in the house.

My father and step-mom came here to help me out (b/c I was also in school) and the first thing I heard my step-mom say to my dad was "what did she do to make him to this?" Uh, nothing. In fact, I had been to the point of exhaustion myself trying to help him (now known as enabling.) I loved him with all my heart and couldn't understand why he would try to kill himself.

This same scenario played out nearly half a dozen times over many years, even tho he was on medication, seeing a therapist, and in a job in which he was/is well regarded. There is so much more about all this... both children with big "issues" - I think I just couldn't handle all the stress anymore. I asked for a separation... a "tough love" moment. He didn't change a thing except to find someone else and then ask me for a divorce. That was about the last straw after all those years.

So I understand where your son-in-law was, as well as your daughter. Everyone is in pain.

I hate this society for hating its own citizens who need this or that in order to survive. I hate the greed of the wealthy and the hatred for those who hit hard times. I understand your son-in-law b/c I've thought about this very thing myself over the last few years in relation to jobs, insurance, health, relocation ... I haven't given up hope yet, but some days I'm close to it.

I don't know about your relationship with your son-in-law, but to this day I am friendly with and see my ex in-laws. They were part of my life for so long that they are still family. I hope you can still care about him now b/c he needs to feel like he's not alone. Obviously there are huge issues with your daughter, too. She and your grandchildren will also need to have some place and someone safe to go to.

There are free services available for children and spouses in such situations. They're called Al-Anon or Children of Alcoholics... but you don't have to deal with that particular thing to benefit because dysfunction crosses diagnostic boundaries a lot of times.

My heart really goes out to you and your daughter, as well as your son-in-law. Loved ones can also be collateral damage in such situations. The whole experience changed me in ways that I have never been able to move beyond... tho I still hope I can come to terms with many things.

Hopefully your son-in-law will be able to find ways to live with dignity. With a job. With hope for a future.

Hugs to you and yours.

[Ilsa]

125. I am so sorry your family is going through this.

I couldn't do that to my kids -- "leave" them, that is. But I understand the despondency. I'll keep your family in my thoughts. I hope things will get better for everyone there. I am so, so sorry.

[wryter2000]

126. I'm so sorry

Here's hoping he recovers fully. So many people are suffering. I'm sorry this has hit your family.

[happygoluckytoyou]

128. be strong.... it is what we do.... life is not Disneyland...

when he awakens, go slow.... but bring him-------

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE TO BE MADE...
i have lived the difficulty he fears... and there is an end to it through his own strength...
he needs you to NOT JUDGE HIM
he needs to know he can fail, that it is OKAY
and he needs to know to rise again, with new strength...

i know, not easy... but one day at a time
(we who HATE the current government have been doing this for 8 years... our time is coming)

[RedLetterRev]

129. Sorry we're not closer to you

but accept our :hug: electronically. The deep emotion is the same. You have friends and fans who are pulling for you and your family. R and I are sending Good Energy and thoughts of comfort your way.

[beac]

130. I'm so sorry.

Sending a little strength your way...

:hug:

[Tatiana]

150. I am praying for you. I hope your s-i-l makes a full recovery.

I hope, as a country and as a people, and just as human beings who care for one another, we can give him a reason to live.

:hug:

[WheelWalker]

156. May you and your loved ones be relieved of your great suffering in this moment.

Another casualty in Bush's war on America.