Father's Day cards banned in Scottish schools

[Squatch]

Thousands of primary pupils were prevented from making Father's Day cards at school for fear of embarrassing classmates who live with single mothers and lesbians.

The politically correct policy was quietly adopted at schools "in the interests of sensitivity" over the growing number of lone-parent and same-sex households.

It only emerged after a large number of fathers failed to receive their traditional cards and handmade gifts.

Family rights campaigners last night condemned the policy as "absurd" and argued that it is marginalising fathers, but local authorities said teachers need to react to "the changing pattern of family life".

Link

[NYC Liberal]

1. The solution, I think, is just to have a Parent's Day

instead of having two separate days. It makes sense either way, whether this was an issue or not.

[ulysses]

2. sounds like a plan - after all, what about two-dad households?

[no_hypocrisy]

3. I dunno. They did all right during WWI and WWII when children lost their

fathers on the battlefield. And there's always Mother's Day for the single mothers and lesbian mothers.

[electron_blue]

9. Do you really think those (or any) kids did all right on Father's day after WW1 & 2?

The point is this is not for the mothers, this is for the kids. And kids' aches and miseries are very real when there is an activity all wrapped around father's day and a reminder that they have no father.

As an aunt to two nieces who lost their father at ages 2.5 and 9 months (he died suddenly), and as a mother to a child whose father largely abandoned her, I am very grateful that father's day falls outside the school year where I live.

[LeftishBrit]

10. In the UK, Fathers Day was never nearly as big a day as Mothers Day

We certainly never made Fathers Day cards at school when I was a child; though we did do Mothers Day cards. And my school was extremely traditional even for the time (1970s), and far from being politically correct.

I have just had a look in this connection at Iona and Peter Opie's "The Lore and Language of Schoolchildren", published in 1959, which gives a detailed account of the "Children's Calendar", with the important days that children celebrated. There is *no* mention at all of Fathers Day. There is an extensive account of Mothers Day/ Mothering Sunday but even with regard to this day, the authors noted that 'the intense enthusiasm for this festival ... only arose at the beginning of the 1950s' and that 'following the war, manufacturers seized on the idea that this was another occasion when presents could be given; and the day has grown in importance, year by year'.

So I really doubt that most wartime British schools *did* expect children to make Fathers Day cards.

[LeftishBrit]

4. The Telegraph is a very right-wing paper

As a researcher on topics related to education, I have lots of contacts with primary schools (admittedly, in England not Scotland) and I've never come across children being prevented from making any sort of card that they wished to make. What I suspect is that the schools chose not to *set the children the task of making Fathers Day cards*, and that this has been represented in the Telegraph as *preventing* them from doing so.

Since many children do *not* have fathers at home, I think it actually makes sense not to require them to make Fathers Day cards unless they choose to. The 'lesbian' issue is a right-wing red herring; it's the far larger proportion of single-parent families that is relevant here.

[wtmusic]

7. Thanks for perspective. Makes sense. nt

[muriel_volestrangler]

12. Yeah, the other report I can find is from the Sunday Times

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/scotland/article4188170.ece

Not quite so right wing, but can still be prone to exaggerating this kind of story. The quotes seem almost identical (I think the Telegraph has some plagiarism charges to answer, frankly), but when you actually read them, there doesn't seem to have been any 'edict' or 'ban' that people can point at - just that authorities say "we leave it up to schools and teachers to decide if making Fathers' Day cards at school is a good idea".

I'd like to point out my father was (and is, for that matter) very traditional - he doesn't think Father's Day is worth observing at all, since it was recently made up. And the rather traditional schools I went to never did anything about it either (I can't remember doing anything about Mothering Sunday at school for that matter - it was something I did at home).

[mainegreen]

5. Oh what a crock of shit.

And this is coming from a child of a single mom.

It's OK that not everyone can celebrate the same things.
Children will get hurt feelings from time to time. Children need to learn to deal with these feelings in a positive way, not simply avoiding them all together.

Mr. Rogers taught this one right. Perhaps we should send some Mr Rogers episodes to them so they can try and teach their kids how to deal with emotions, instead of dancing around them?

[ChazII]

8. Second your remark.

Children do need to learn to deal with emotions in a positive way. Families are different.

[redqueen]

13. What you said.

Avoiding offending people is one thing... trying to avoid any negative emotions at all is lunacy.

[sandnsea]

6. That's absurd, absolutely nuts

No wonder men walk away when they're treated so shabbily.

[Skinner]

11. This doesn't seem right to me.

I'm all for sensitivity. But I don't really get this. Are they trying to avoid reminding fatherless kids that they are fatherless? As someone who spent part of my adolescence without a father, I can say from experience you can't really avoid being reminded of it. Or are they afraid that kids might feel ashamed or embarrassed that they don't have a father? Well, for one thing it's not something to be ashamed of. And I suspect most kids would have learned to deal with that long before having to deal with it at school.

Let those kids make cards for their mothers. Or for a male grandparent or other family member if the gender part is so important.

And then there's this, from the article:

"The making of Mother's Day cards and crafts, in the run-up to Mothering Sunday, remains generally permitted."

That doesn't seem totally fair either. Maybe the schools should get out of the parents-day-card business entirely.

[Midlodemocrat]

14. This is stupid. Let the kids make cards for their moms or a male

uncle or cousin or whatever.

Kids without fathers are certainly not going to 'forget' that they don't have a dad because they don't make cards in school.

Compassion and sensitivity is one thing, but this is going overboard.