The Night Before Christmas by Rep. Edward Markey

[ProSense]

The Night Before Christmas (Rep. Edward Markey)

December 16th, 2007

‘Twas two weeks before Christmas, when all through the house
Mothers and fathers were starting to grouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
With hopes that safe products would soon be stuffed there

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
Wishing for toys that did not contain lead.

And Ma had just disappointed the tots
When she had to throw out their new Aquadots

Then out at the CPSC there arose such a clatter,
The House and the Senate asked what was the matter.

We had several hearings with the Chairman, Nancy Nord
Her answers left us, frankly, quite floored.

She didn’t want money, she didn’t need staff
Her protestations, in short, made us laugh

Then, what to our wondering eyes should appear,
But a CPSC bill for Congress to clear

This bill has good points, on that we agree
It adds needed money and new F.T.E’s

It makes sure that kids’ toys will not contain lead
It helps to ensure they are tested instead

Test Barbie! Diego! And poisonous Thomas!
Mattel, Hasbro and Disney! You all must now promise

To test your new products! Be sure to comply!
Get toys off store shelves when things go awry!

This morning we meet as the lobbyists try
To convince all the Members NOT to vote “aye”

They say NO to amendments to be sure nationwide
All children are safe on amusement park rides

They fight for the industry’s lawsuits in court
To prevent the release of toy safety reports

As for plans to require that all dangers be known
The lobbyists all shake their heads and they groan.

And others who try to mandate recalls
Their efforts may not be successful at all

Today as we work on this new safety bill
I hope that we all can agree that we will -

Say AYE to amendments that make the bill stronger
So that toys that are toxic can’t be sold any longer

Let’s welcome rides that are scary and fast
But let CPSC in to check them at last

Let’s roll up our sleeves, and clean up store shelves
So families can focus on reindeer and elves.

And to these families we’ll say once we finish this fight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

[existentialist]

1. That's cute.

[johncoby2]

2. Mne is better: T'was the Night Before Impeachment.

http://bayareahouston.blogspot.com/2007/12/twas-night-before-impeachment.html

T’was the night before impeachment it was cold, wet, and rainy
Not a creature was testifying, not even Dick Cheney.

Impeachment resolutions were hung in the House for appearing
Waiting for Conyers and Waxman, and a long awaited hearing

The Republicans were tossing, Oh tomorrow they dread
While visions of perjury dance in their heads.