My wife of 20 years died yesterday morning....

[King_Crimson]

at 5:30a.m. of complications brought on by liver cancer. Needless to say...I am totally devatated. She died at St.Joseph Hospital here in Fort Wayne, Indiana after having surgery performed at Parkview Hospital just 3 weeks ago. The surgery that was performed was supposed to shrink and destroy the tumor that had been found in her liver. She was released from Parkview 1 day after the intrusive surgery was performed and she continued to get worse as we were trying to recuperate her here at home. Since she had been home, she started experiencing extreme difficulty in urinating and had no appetite at all. Sunday, after a night of virtually no sleep, agonizing in pain, and extreme difficulty breathing, we took her to St.Joe where they immediatley done x-rays and informed us that the liver had in fact ENLARGED and that it was now full of the cancer and was wreaking havoc on her kidneys and there was a tear in her left lung. They put her on dialysis to try to clean her blood since she was unable to excrete the toxins in her system through the kidneys. Her condition started to rapidly deteriorate and at approx. 12:30 a.m. she was moved to the ICU where a barrage of needles were inserted in her and NOTHING else done, nor were we informed that the end was quite possibly near. An oxygen mask was placed on her face and her eyes continually kept rolling back in her head and the moaning and groaning from the pain she was experienceing will forever be embedded in my mind. AND...NOT ONCE did a doctor appear in her room, just a variety of nurses, several who were very rude. At 5:25a.m., the monitor watching Sandy's blood pressure and heartbeat flatlind. The resucitation team arrived in a matter of seconds, and try as they might, it was to no avail. She was gone at 5:30.

It is my contention that quite possibly the State of Indiana is complicit in the murder of my wife. Sandy was on Medicaid and I can imagine that the cost of this whole cancer ordeal was becoming quite expensive. The Governor of this state is Bush crony "Our Bitch" Mitch Daniels who not more than thirty days ago announced there would be major cuts in social programs such as Medicaid and food stamps.

I could go on here but the anger and hurt I am feeling is becoming overwhelming. I would like to thank those of you who offered me words of encouragement and hope when I first posted about my wife's plight.

[Horse with no Name]

1. I am sorry for your loss. n/t

[liberaldemocrat7]

129. The earth has shaken.

I sympathize with the death of your wife. Noone should die for substandard care.


I can only say you do have something you can do. Instead of bringing out the pitchforks and torches, I continue to say take your anger out peacefully on the contributors of the Republican party by contacting them and demand the restoration of progressive legislation and social programs for the poor and middle class and icnrease in taxes for the wealthy and if they don't you tell them you will continue not buying their products until they do and get as many friends and colleagues and those people you meet to do so as well.

Do not sit in anger and silence. Go to http://www.dmocrats.org and do something. Copy and paste the agenda and send it to the major Republican contributors.

[knitter4democracy]

236. First, go for the hospitals.

They're the ones who committed malpractice. Write letters to each hospital detailing what happened when and whom you spoke with to the best of your recollection. CC those letters to the State Medical board. You will get more action if you send it to the chief of oncology at the first hospital and the ICU chief at the second. They're the ones directly responsible for overseeing the care of the patients.

Contact the State Medical board to see how to file a complaint. File a complaint with the state office for Medicaid as well, considering they should know what's being done with their money.

Liver surgery should never be a day surgery--not one as big as what your dear wife deal with. The liver is so easy to mess up, and infection can be a huge risk, depending on the procedure. The first problem was in their discharging her too damn soon. The second problem was in not making an appointment for followup just a couple of days later. The third problem was in not fully explaining what to look for after the surgery--she shouldn't have been home with those symptoms, and they should've made sure of that.

I'm just sick. Four months ago yesterday was my big surgery, and I shudder to think of where I'd be if they'd treated me like that.

[Bucky]

393. I am so sorry for your devastating loss. I hope you will find peace--and justice--in this.

God bless you. Travel well and keep us up to date

[The Straight Story]

2. So sorry to hear this

I don't really know what else to say, just too damn sad.

[lovuian]

3. May she be at Peace

So Sorry
The Medical care in the United States is definitely got major problems

[Kagemusha]

4. Condolances.

This stuff's never easy.

[SoCalDem]

5. I am so sorry to hear of this..

How could they ever release her so soon after surgery? That is downright obscene.

I hope you see a lawyer..and soon..

Even in hopeless cases, most hospitals at least pretend to try to save a life.:grr:

Hugs to you and yours..and again.. I am so sorry for your loss..

[HCE SuiGeneris]

109. May you find peace

in remembering the joys you shared. And may her best traits continue to reflect in yourself. I am sorry for your loss and wish you peace. :grouphug:

[WCGreen]

6. Dude, I feel for you....

Man that is just awful...

And I believe your contention...

[Bjornsdotter]

7. I am so very sorry

...for your loss.

:hug:

[saracat]

8. I am so very sorry.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[alittlelark]

9. OMG - that is so horrible.

I don't know what to say.:cry:

Be overwhelmed right now - there is no other option.:cry:

[RB TexLa]

10. So sorry, when my mother passed from the same thing, my wife was

everything. There was complete emptiness in my life, but when I looked at her there was such fullness. I can't begin to think of the devastation you must be going through. No words can help you, knowing that others care can and will I'm sure. It's a horrible thing to go through, and I wish you every bit of comfort and peace you can find as you deal with this.


Peace

[Cleita]

11. What a terrible ordeal for you.

May she be at peace now. :hug:

[Contrite]

12. How agonizing for you.

My heart aches reading what you and your dear wife went through.

[villager]

13. hang in there, know how hard it will be, and know

there will be another side to the grief, eventually...

take care...

[Justitia]

14. I am so very sorry. Can you rest at all? Do you have any support? -eom

[King_Crimson]

45. I have the support of my family...

but I am unable to sleep much. I'm 55 years old and I can't stop the pain or the tears as much as I try and I'm about to let loose right now. Thank you for your concern and thak you so much to everyone else here!

[Justitia]

50. Accept offers of help. Take something to sleep if you have to. The days ahead will be exhausting.

You can't let yourself get sick in the process and that is a real possibility right now.

Once again, I'm so very, very sorry.

Please try to check in with us when you're feeling up to it.

Take care King Crimson.

[SammyWinstonJack]

217. ..

:hug:

[motocicleta]

368. Let me share my experience - I don't know if it will help

First let me say I am so saddened by your loss, and I wish you the best.

I lost my father in somewhat similar circumstances, but crucially different. This was 11 years ago; I was 25. He was only 57. He had very long, very invasive brain surgery, then was released quickly into my care. The release documentation was limited. He could not be on blood thinners so that he would be able to clot and heal. To make a long story short, after a terrible 9 days at home that included another trip to the ER and overnight stay, he died of a pulmonary embolus due to a lack of exercise; essentially he developed a blood clot in his leg that traveled to his lungs and caused arrhythmia. After all of the expensive surgery that the insurance had paid for, insurance did not want to pay for much in the way of aftercare, and we only received one visit from a nurse. It turned out that if he had been given some type of compression stockings, he may have had enough blood circulation to avoid developing a clot. So he was placed in my ignorant care without the basics that could have prevented his death. I blamed myself for some time, but in the end if the insurance company had different priorities, my dad would probably be alive now.

I have two main things to say about this as it relates to your experience:
1. his death was very traumatic - I unsuccessfully did CPR on him - and in the following years I ended up going to a therapist who specialized in post-traumatic stress. This was very, very helpful, shockingly so, in letting me get past the terrible images that came to me from his death. Your description sounds similarly awful.

2. we decided not to file a lawsuit. In California, we had three years to do so, and by the time that period was ending, I had gotten to the point that I felt there was little point in fighting. I couldn't get him back by fighting, and I had little hope in punishing the insurance company. I have no real advice for you on this, but now I definitely feel that if I had more time and energy I wish I would have done more to push for some sort of resolution. Perhaps I could have helped another family avoid my heartbreak, but at the time I lacked the necessary will. Now that I read this, it doesn't seem helpful at all. I just wish that hearing what others have gone through in this area will help you decide what is best for you and your family.

Most of all, as much as I have gone through something similar, I only know enough to say that I cannot imagine what you are going through. Losing a parent is one thing; losing my wife would be so much harder for me. I had bouts of uncontrollable tears and pain for months after my dad's death, and I can only wish you the best recovery possible.

I hope this isn't unasked-for advice.

[SCRUBDASHRUB]

15. I am so very sorry. May she rest in peace.

:hug:

[MeDeMax]

16. very sorry for your loss, think of your time together

she deserves to be remembered in celebration of your love for each other, not your anger for whatever it may be.

Again, I am deeply sorry for your loss, I can't imagine how tough it is on you.

[Erika]

17. Peace be unto you and her n/t

[LouisianaLiberal]

18. Very sorry. Take care.

[Hekate]

19. I am so sorry for your loss. May she be at peace...

...and may you also come to peace. This is a terrible hard road to travel.
:hug:

Hekate

[barbtries]

you have my deepest sympathy

on the loss of your dear wife.

peace out

[Sydnie]

20. I am so sorry

At a time like this there are no words that I could say that would bring comfort for such a loss. Please know that you will be in my thoughts. :hug:

[trashcanistanista]

21. I am so sorry for your tragic loss

and offer my condolences during this most difficult time.

[Pushed To The Left]

22. I'm very sorry to hear about your loss.

:hug:

[peace13]

23. What a sad time.

I am so sorry to hear about your wife. Know that you did the best that you could for her. She must have been a very brave woman. Peace and love your way, Kim

[angstlessk]

24. I am so sorry for your loss..and anger is natural...

I hope you find peace. I pray for you and your loved ones during this very difficult time. May your anger be turned into something positive, as you have suffered at the hands of cruel policies.

[MADem]

How profoundly heartbreaking. You have my deepest sympathies NT.

[Nite Owl]

25. I'm so sorry for your loss

it's hard enough to lose the one you love the most in the world but to have the visions to carry with you makes this time that much more difficult, along with the pain of seeing her go without the help and care she needed. It's always bothered me when people say that 'it's just politics'. Politics is a matter of life and death more often than not. I pray that you are able to have some peace in your heart.

[Suich]

26. I am so sorry, King Crimson.

My sincere condolences...

:hug:

[madrchsod]

27. so sorry for the loss of your wife

i`m really at a loss for words to say about the other.

[amitten]

28. I'm praying for you. I hope so much that you can find comfort

somewhere. I know how horribly angry you are. It is possible that the doctors knew that her life was past saving on her last trip to the hospital. A doctor should have spoken with you about this regardless.

I am so sorry for your loss. You did everything you could. :grouphug:

[rockymountaindem]

29. My condolences n.t.

[Counciltucky]

30. My condolences for you and your family.

Nobody deserves to witness or feel something like that happen.

[midnight]

31. O my lord what a horrible ordeal . Nothing I seem to want to

say seems to lessen this horrible experience or loss. Here is a hug for you on this very sad day. Please come here and bitch all you want- Health care is for those lucky enough to get it.

[BlackVelvet04]

32. I'm so sorry....

how absolutely awful.

Please take care of yourself.

[allinktup]

33. I am so sorry for your loss, I'll say a prayer for you tonight

[Sapphire Blue]

34. Tonight...

Remember the first time you held hands, remember your first kiss, remember looking at the stars with her... look up at those stars right now... she's with you, King_Crimson.

:hug:

[Mojorabbit]

35. I am so very sorry

I lost my dad three weeks ago and I still am just torn up. I just did not expect it.
I know there are no words to make it better.
Big hugs.

[TorchTheWitch]

191. Sorry to hear about you dad, Mojorabbit

I lost my father nearly 10 years ago. It's so very hard to deal with, I know. But I promise you it will get better. It just takes some time to heal.

Big hugs for you, dear... :hug:

[myrna minx]

363. I am so sorry, Mojorabbit.

:hug:

[fooj]

36. I wish you peace, King Crimson.

I'm sorry for your loss.

[Laurier]

37. Terribly sorry for your loss, King Crimson.

words seem so inadequate.

:cry:

[poverlay]

38. We're here for you. One step at a time...

[patrice]

39. There isn't much anyone can say, except that we are here for you King Crimson.

My husband of 29 years passed-on 10 years ago. It still hurts.
My big sister, 57 years old, died of lung-cancer 2 years ago. She had all of the insurance and benefits, but they basically destroyed her liver trying to treat mesothelioma, so though her time was short, the wrong kind of treatment shortened it even more, less than 2 months from diagnosis until she passed on.

I have some idea what you're going through.

Take especially good care of yourself. I will keep you in my prayers. :hug:

[Rick Myers]

40. My condolences!

I lost my mother to cancer last September. The story was very familiar.

All my best karma to you and your family.

We here at DU are your family too...

Godspeed my friend, and may she rest in peace.

[Crabby Appleton]

41. My condolences n/t

[Bonobo]

42. I am having a moment of silence. My sincerest condolences.

I hope you find peace soon and that only the lovely memories of your wife remain.

She is not in pain anymore. It is you that now needs support.

Be good to yourself and accept any and all help that you can and NEVER blame yourself for anything.

She would not want you to be in pain either.

[Mind_your_head]

43. I am so sorry for your loss

It's a wonderful thing to have loved someone as much as you loved your wife....not everyone 'knows' that experience. Be grateful for the love you have known. :hug: Continue to honor that love (and her).

Peace,
M_Y_H

[Sanity Claws]

44. I am so sorry for your loss

:hug:
Please let us know if there is anything we can do. Take time to grieve.

[G_Leo_Criley]

46. I am so sorry

I'm so sorry for your unimaginable loss. Sorry too that you had to experience shoddy treatment during this awful experience.

:hug:

My thoughts are with you. May she rest in peace.

glc

[salib]

47. I am truly sorry

To lose the one that you desperately must protect is beyond understanding for most. It will be hard. Remember that love and know it is what is worth it.

[aquart]

48. I am so sorry.

Watching her suffer.....you are so right to be angry. But that's separate from the pain, and loneliness, and grief you are going to have to go thru now. And the silence where all the sights and thoughts you were going to share with her would be. And I know there's no way thru it but thru it.

I hope you have people to help you now (grieving people should stay away from stoves), and to keep in touch afterwards.

And, not necessarily to do anything but just in case, get your hands on your wife's medical records. And copies of her charts if that is possible. Just a thought.

This sucks.

PS: Just in case nobody else tells you, no major decisions for a year. Your brain's been hit by the equivalent of a ten ton truck, and it's going to take its time to make sense of anything.

[devilgrrl]

49. I'm very sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[Name removed]

51. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Name removed]

82. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[midnight]

232. Thanks Shireen for speaking up for King Crimson.

[myrna minx]

362. I can't even imagine what would cause someone to post something

that would need to be deleted in a thread posted by someone who is mourning, I hope the OP didn't have a chance to read it. :cry:

[Erika]

52. Most important, know you are not alone

Peace.

[man4allcats]

53. I am so very sorry for your sadness and your loss.

Take care of yourself.

[EFerrari]

54. . . .

:hug:

[NanceGreggs]

55. I am so sorry for your loss ...

... but remember you are not alone.

Your DU family is with you -- and "We won't let go, until you're safe and sound."

[Sonicmedusa]

56. I am so sorry for your loss

The travesty of medicaid aside (and the only thing worse than medicaid is no insurance at all in the US- one of the richest counties in the world- go figure!), when cancer hits the liver or brain, it is all about over but for the crying.

Again, I am SO sorry.

I love KC, too.

Please be well. :X

[MagickMuffin]

57. I'm so sorry for your loss King_Crimson

I know this is a really difficult time in your life, and you will be in my thoughts.

I don't know what to say except time will heals all wounds and it might take time considering the circumstances that brought about this untimely death.:cry:
I speak from experience. And one of the best healing remedies was just remembering how much that person meant to me, and what a better person I am because of my beloved friend.

Just remember that DU is here for you!:grouphug:

[bobthedrummer]

58. .

[Arugula Latte]

59. I don't have any words except I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[Catherine Vincent]

60. So sorry for your loss, King Crimson.

My condolences to you and your family.

[EV_Ares]

61. So very very sorry for your loss. I wish there was more we all could

say or do to help you through your grief. Our thoughts are with you.

[SeattleGirl]

62. My condolences to you, King_Crimson

:hug:

[northofdenali]

63. My heart goes out to you, King -

and to your family. Your anger is 100% understandable. I am so sorry for your loss.

[vanboggie]

64. So sorry and I understand

I understand how much more difficult the loss of a loved one is when you know they could have received better care. I lost both of my parents to glaring mistakes made by the same hospital, and they died over two decades apart. My mother's death was the most recent, and an attorney friend who was as outraged as me said nothing would be accomplished by suing the hospital since the value of her life would be in dollars and she had no earning power left. His advice: Never vote for a Republican. We already know that part.

All that said, the anger makes it so much more difficult to accept the loss. My husband had a sibling who was murdered, and the recovery process is much the same. It's just tougher to nail medical corporations and government to seek justice for the crime. I can't even imagine your pain losing your wife this way. I'm so sorry King. I could go on and on here, too. Just know the anger makes it so much more difficult to accept. Grieve, scream, cry, seek help for your pain. I'm so very, very sorry for your loss.

[Marlie]

65. I'm so sorry

I lost my wonderful husband six weeks ago and watched him suffer too. I'm praying for the day I
can remember all the happy times we had together instead of the end which is so vivid now and hurts
so badly. I understand the heartache you're feeling. The system stinks, no one seems to really care anymore and yet your loved ones are at their mercy. Life's not fair unless you're a millionaire and can buy the best care, the Dick Cheneys of the World, the rest of us don't really matter, young or old. Again, I'm so sorry for both you and your beloved wife.

[orleans]

118. marlie, i'm really sorry to hear about your husband

i hope you're doing okay.

[RB TexLa]

359. The days you are praying for will come

As I'm sure you know they will not come very soon, but they will come. The words of strangers, friends and family can't make them come faster and aren't magic, but they do serve to let you know that others care and that others feel grief with you. We think about the people in our lives as we express our sympathies and shared grief with you, it is the bond of humanity, it is the same bond that you had on a much more personal level with your husband. It is that bond that after you go through the natural emotions involved that will bring those days to you. Do know the first time you think about something and truly enjoy the memory will be a wonderful and great feeling.

[roguevalley]

66. Oh god. There aren't words to express the sadness I feel for you

and your courageous wife right now. I am so very, very sorry. Please feel the concern and love we have for you right now. It isn't enough but its all we can do. I pray for you and your family at this moment. As for your wonderful sweet wife, she is free of pain. That is the only consolation I took from my father passing in July and I hope it is a comfort to you.

[Porcupine]

67. So sorry for your loss.

I have lost family members to cancer and it's never what the doctors tell you will happen. They are required to be optomistic regardless of the situation. Please seek counseling and look for a path to forgiveness.

[tnlefty]

68. I'm sorry that I missed your previous post about your wife, and I'm

so sorry about your experience, and the pain that you will endure - it's hell to lose someone you love. I'll be thinking of you. :hug:

[Bluebear]

69. KC, my deepest condolences.

[lligrd]

70. So Sorry. There Is Nothing Worse Than Watching A Loved

one in pain and being unable to do anything about it. The fact they sent her home so quickly and failed to adequately monitor her progress speaks volumes about the state of our health care. And they didn't even do anything about her pain? Greatest health care in the world, my ass.

[Triana]

71. Oh. My. God.

What a horrible experience and I am SO SORRY for your loss!

I agree with you that the State is complicit in her suffering and death.

Please allow yourself time to grieve and take care of yourself while you sort out what to do. One day, one moment at a time. Don't try to handle more than that.

And by all means, post on DU for support. We're all grieving with you, KC.

:grouphug:

[ClayZ]

72. I am so sorry!

We will light a candle and hope you find peace in the happier memories!

God Bless You!

[file83]

73. I lost my mom in an ICU, on Oxygen when I was a kid...

She died of a "rare form" of pneumonia. It took a few days and then she was pretty much unconscious for the last few days until she passed. Worst experience of my life. I felt there was no dignity for my mother, seeing her all hooked up to those machines in such a absurd way, like some sort of bizarre Terry Gilliam movie.

I hate hospitals now. People there are too comfortable/desensitized to death and the effects it has on the people that are there just "visiting".

I feel your loss my friend. I wish you strength and courage to see yourself through this. Take care.

[Erika]

80. We care about you also

Peace to you. That is the most we can hope for, in my opinion. Peace is beautiful.

[file83]

95. Thanks Erika.

Peace to you too.

[Buddyblazon]

74. Oh no....

KC...I am so sorry for your loss. Your story is heartbreaking. I'm very sorry the two of you had to go through that.

I wish there was someway to ease the unbelievable pain you are feeling right now.

Hang in there buddy.

[shireen]

75. deepest deepest condolences

i cannot imagine what you're going through right now.

and i'm livid about the treatment she received! Please try to get copies of all her hospital records, including her chart, as soon as possible. DU'ers who are more knowledgeable than me can provide the appropriate advice at a later date, but right now, it's important to get hold of the evidence you'll need if you decide to pursue legal action.

This is very distressing. Please take care. I'll be thinking of you.

:hug:

[Swamp Rat]

76. .

:hug:

[Zodiak]

77. This is the worst that life has to offer

the loss of your partner. I cannot fathom it, but I am terribly sorry for what happened. And to feel victimized by the system at the same time...

:hugs:

[Duppers]

78. I am so sorry

And I understand your anger. If the moon and stars could stop shinning, your reality could not be altered more. I understand your pain.

My cousin just underwent an operation/treatment for liver cancer last week. I must go see him.

We must have universal health care in this country. We must!

I wish I had words to help smooth your pain, KC. I am so sorry. You take care.

[fed-up]

79. I'm sending hugs your way {{{{{ {{{{{ {{{{{ {{{{{ hugs}}}}} }}}}} }}}}} }}}}} nt

[sandnsea]

81. Very sorry for your loss

I can't imagine the pain you are suffering. I hope you will lean on everyone that you can during these next days. :hug:

[Richard Steele]

83. That sucks, King Crimson. Condolences to you and yours.

[kestrel91316]

84. Deepest condolences............

when things settle down, you need to talk to a good malpractice attorney. If your wife was terminally ill it was practically criminal to not provide her with better pain control, if nothing else. And the lack of attention by an actual physician is cause for concern.

Are you by any chance non-white? I hate what I am thinking here.........

[Fovea]

85. She is at peace

and may you rest and heal.

[MiaCulpa]

86. Very sorry for your loss.

May she be at peace, and I hope that you find some solace in the knowledge that you were a loving and supportive spouse until the end. Please talk often of your pain and anger, there are groups of people going through the same as you everywhere. I've heard many people say they're a blessing. Most all churches have them, and they're free. Don't suffer silently. Hold on.

[Greybnk48]

87. What an ordeal for both you and your wife

I'm so sorry. Our healthcare system is a disgrace given what it could be.

[JackRiddler]

88. My god I am so sorry for your loss

[Old and In the Way]

89. Profoundly saddened and disturbed to read this.

I can only imagine how I'd be affected in a similar situation. I hope you find peace during this very difficult time.

[ancient_nomad]

90. My God, I am so sorry!

So sorry what you have had to go through, and what your dear wife endured.
Please accept my deepest sympathy. She should not have been allowed to suffer like that. God Bless You, and may you find comfort in knowing she is at peace and free of pain.

[Raksha]

91. I can totally relate to your anguish.

I lost my husband of 25 years to leukemia, so I know how you feel. He wasn't on Medicare, but I'll always wonder why the HMO never even suggested a bone marrow transplant.

[Arugula Latte]

...

:hug:

[BlueIris]

92. Terribly sorry.

I hope that you will eventually be able to find some peace. At least your spouse is no longer suffering.

[VolcanoJen]

93. My sincere sympathy

:hug: King_Crimson :hug:

[WinkyDink]

94. {{{{{King_Crimson}}}}} You have my deepest sympathy.

[nashville_brook]

96. please accept my deepest sympathy...

i also have the experience of being critically ill and not being seen by a doctor in the hospital. the most recent episode i was having a cardiac event that started on a Friday night. i was told i couldn't see a doctor because it was the weekend. i was in extrordinary pain and was passed over for meds repeatedly -- as an oversight. everyone was rude, particularly in having to admit a mistake. god i hate hospitals.

i am so sorry for your loss.

[faithnotgreed]

97. all our love and prayers and light to you

keep whichever you want and pass on the rest

lacking any other words we are so truly sorry and hope you will find the answers and peace you need

[flyarm]

98. My deepest thoughts and prayers for you and your family!

and my sincerest condolences...i can hear your pain and anger...i only hope time will give you some peace...

it is a horrible thing to seeone we love pass on because of incompetance or malpractice or something unjust..

it is very difficult to get past...

but you must and time is your only help.

Bless you and may Sandy fly , out of pain, with her Angels...

I am sending hugs and love to you ..at this painful time..

fly

[libnnc]

My God I am so sorry.

I wish I had some more comforting words. You've been through hell and to have seen your wife suffer like that with such incompetent care is just too much. My heart goes out to you. I'm just so terribly sorry. :cry: :hug:

[UrbScotty]

99. How horrible.

Peace.

:hug:

[area51]

100. I am so sorry, KC.

:cry:

[Straight Shooter]

101. Oh dear God, what an ordeal.

I'm so sorry.

We keep trying to fight to take care of one another, and they keep tearing us down. :cry:

:hug:

[quiet.american]

102. I'm so sorry for your loss and pain, King. So sorry.... n/t

[Jane Austin]

103. I'm so very sorry about your loss.

What a terrible thing for you to have to experience. One of these days we're going to have equal access to health care so this kind of thing doesn't have to happen any more.

My heart goes out to you, and I hope you'll stay in touch with DU.

[Dastard Stepchild]

104. King Crimson...

I am very sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you, your family and friends at this time.

[calimary]

105. I'm so sorry to hear this! So sorry for your loss. So sorry for your

pain - and hers.

How can these hard-hearted pea brains think only of cutting such URGENT, ESSENTIAL social services and programs? Are they just so damned insulated that they neither know or care? Is that it?

I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's just a sin.

All I can offer are words, but let me tell you, when my own mom died last November and I posted here, I was truly overwhelmed by the sympathy and comfort and tenderness that flowed toward me from every corner of DU. It helped - SO MUCH!!! It still does. You are not alone in your suffering, even though you may feel isolated. This community is here to embrace you and buoy you up. Keep this thread and reread it whenever you need it. It really does make a difference, and ease some of the pain.

:hug:

[w8liftinglady]

106. I am so sorry.I am a critical care nurse.

when you are ready...I'll help you...pm me

[jaysunb]

107. Heart felt condolences to you friend....

I'm sorry for your and your wifes suffering.....

[Bluestar]

108. I am so sorry for your loss; Bless you and your family

[demobabe]

110. I am so sorry.

Our country's medical system is just criminal. Our government is supposed to provide for our common welfare, and the way our medical system works makes me nuts.

I wish there was something more I could do than offer condolences that could change this.

I am sorry for your loss, and I empathize.

:hug:

[Cetacea]

111. I am so sorry.

I do not know you but I feel terribly sad. Again, I am sorry and I can only hope that you get through this in time. From personal experience, I found the the C.S. Lewis book, "A Grief Observed" very helpful. One can hope that she is in a much better place than the world we live in.

[malmapus]

112. Can't say what hasn't already been said over and over here

I feel so very sorry for your loss. Words that I can type here just don't feel like they would mean much in the light of what your wife had to go through and what you are going through right now.

But just know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers right now.

[SheWhoMustBeObeyed]

113. My deepest condolences

I have no words sufficient to convey my sadness over your terrible ordeal. I am so sorry for your loss.

[Breeze54]

114. This is so sad...I'm sorry for your loss.

You must be devastated. My heart goes out to you.

[nicknameless]

115. I am so very sorry.

[Exultant Democracy]

116. My deepest condolences

I grieve for your lost King. I can't imagine what you must feel like and what might be going through your mind. I hope you can take some solace in the fact that you were there for her with her till the end. I wish you and your family all of the best.

edit: I hope those bastards are held accountable or health care system is a disgrace.

[Dean Martin]

117. I'm very sorry

[Greyhound]

119. Blessed be to you and yours.

My mom went from cancer that went undetected for a decade, it is not a pleasant way to go.

I am so sorry.

[malaise]

120. Deepest sympathy n/t

[orleans]

121. how horrible. i know this is a very difficult time for you

we're here when you need us.

there is no greater sadness than having to say goodbye to someone you love.

our hearts are with you.

my heart goes out to you.

take good care of yourself

[Decruiter]

122. To say I'm sorry for your loss seems so empty.

I do feel sorry and I have yet to experience the pain you are in. Take heart and be at peace. You have many friends and you and your family are surrounded with peace and lots of love.

[midnight armadillo]

123. I am so very sorry to hear of this

My father died of liver cancer when I was 16. My sincere condolences.

[ShortnFiery]

124. I'm also very sorry for your loss. n/t

[blondie58]

125. my deepest condolences

I am so sorry for your loss.

[Raine]

126. I'm so sorry

you'll be in my thoughts. :hug:

[Solly Mack]

127. I'm so sorry, KC!

My most heartfelt condolences.

[emmajane67]

128. I am so sorry.

Take what comfort you can from the fact you are in so many peoples thoughts and prayers.
I hope you are able to find some peace in the memories you have from the 20 years you spent with your beloved wife.
Ask for what you need in this difficult time and take care of yourself as best you can.
Again, I am so sorry this is happening to you.

[onecent]

130. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Birthmark]

131. I am so sorry for your loss, KC

I can't imagine the pain. Good luck, sir.

[OneBlueSky]

132. my sincere condolences, King Crimson . . . my mom died from liver cancer . . .

several years ago after putting up a year-long struggle to beat it . . . it's a terrible disease that no one should have to suffer . . .

may your wife rest in peace, and your memories of her all be good ones . . . :hug:

[Jeanette in FL]

133. I am so sorry for your loss

There are no word at this time to ease you through your pain. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

[xchrom]

134. very sorry about your wife.

your lose is terrible.

peace be with you and her now and forever.

[Surya Gayatri]

135. Take comfort knowing that her

suffering is over and that you will meet each other again. Be good to yourself--she would want that.

SG:hug:

[livvy]

136. So very sorry for your pain and loss.

It is so hard to see someone you love so dearly go through something like that. The feeling of helplessness, the desire to comfort...and then the loss. I've been there. It really hurts.
Take care of yourself.

[democrank]

137. We`re here for you, K_C.

Hope all these DU words of comfort help. Take good care.

[Danger Mouse]

138. I'm sorry to hear that she suffered so much.

This is a real tragedy, and it does not seem like the doctors did everything they could to save her.
You might consider looking into a lawsuit.
Regardless, my condolences.

[qanda]

139. I am so sorry

I am crying for you. I cannot imagine the hurt and pain you are experiencing right now, but my heart goes out to you. I pray that your dear wife will rest in peace, she certainly deserved a better end.

[bklyncowgirl]

140. I'm sorry for your loss. nt

[Bunny]

141. I'm so sorry.

My condolences for your loss. :hug:

[MadHound]

142. Oh man, I am so sorry for your loss

:hug:
It truly sounds like your wife got second tier treatment. But before you do anything else, allow yourself some time to grieve, everything else can wait.
Take care of yourself, and know that you and yours are in the thoughts and prayers of many, many people.

[yasmina27]

143. I am so very sorry n/t

[trumad]

144. I believe in the afterlife

and I believe you will be with her again.

Take care...

tru

[Junkdrawer]

145. So sorry for your loss and I wish you grace in the battles ahead...n/t

[Berry Cool]

146. My heart breaks for you.

I am so sorry.

[Missy M]

147. My heartfelt and deepest condolences to you

[Katherine Brengle]

148. I'm so sorry...

There are no words.

[pecwae]

149. ((KingCrimson))

I'm terribly, terribly sorry for the horror you and precious Sandy endured.

[Phentex]

150. I'm very sorry for your loss....

I hope you'll talk more about your feelings here.

:hug:

[wicket]

151. My god, I am so sorry

Words fail :(

:cry: :cry:

:hug:

[Jacklyn75]

152. I'm so sorry for your loss! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers! n/t

[H2O Man]

153. I'm sorry.

There really aren't words at these times, but know that your friends on DU are here for you.

Pat

[Deb]

154. My thoughts and prayers are with you

and your family.

[Vinca]

155. I'm so, so sorry.

It doesn't sound right at all that a person would be sent home a day after that kind of surgery. You might want to find an attorney at some point.

[Orangepeel]

156. oh, I'm so sorry.

my deepest sympathy.

[Az]

157. I am so sorry to hear this

I cannot imagine the grief of losing one you love so much. My heart goes out to you.

[dalloway]

158. I am so very sorry for your loss.

One never quite knows what to say.

I've got 9 hearts left--take them all to know that you have a community that supports you even (or especially) in difficult times.

[Octafish]

159. My deepest sympathies to you and yours, King_Crimson.

May the Good Lord give you and your family strength in the coming days.

Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you.

[City Lights]

160. Oh King_Crimson, I'm so very sorry for your loss.

:hug: :cry:

Peace to you. :hug:

[Chorophyll]

161. I am so sorry, King_Crimson. n/t

[Liberal In Texas]

162. My deepest condolences to you.

:cry:

[SalmonChantedEvening]

163. So very sorry to hear of your loss

:hug: :cry:

You and your family are in my thoughts

[mmonk]

164. I am so sorry to hear this.

I hope you get all the help you need and offer my condolences.

[Cobalt Violet]

165. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I don't really know what else to say. I'm sure nothing I can say will give you comfort now. It sounds like she was let out of the hospital way too soon. Had she been sick for awhile?

[ProdigalJunkMail]

166. just damn...so sorry

I cannot even fathom the loss and I know that a couple of words here are just damned small...but please accept my condolences. It seems to me a crime that our bodies should fail us...

sP

[a kennedy]

167. *hugs* and prayers

such a sad state of affairs.

[michreject]

168. I am sorry for your loss.........nt

[dogday]

I am so sorry for your loss

You are going to need time for the healing to begin and it will take a while.. My thoughts and prayers are with you....

[Crunchy Frog]

169. I'm so sorry. The health care system in this country is just about criminal.

I hope you will eventually be able to heal from this, and also tho seek justice on behalf of your wife. Nobody should ever be allowed to pass away in those circumstances.

[Sperk]

170. I am so, so sorry. Your loss is bad enough, but the circumstances of

her death must be almost unbearable. Sending you healing prayers. God Bless you and your family.
:-(

[Annces]

171. Sorry for your loss

I hope you find comfort in the coming months.

[REACTIVATED IN CT]

172. So sorry for your loss, King Crimson n/t

[Felinity]

173. My condolences.

I am so sorry for you loss. It sounds like your wife's last days were made worse through lack of appropriate medical care, and that is terrible for you to have to deal with while mourning her passing.

[coffeenap]

174. So very sorry.

[Klukie]

175. I am sending all my love your way........

because I have no words.

[AzDar]

176. I am so very sorry for your loss. All the best to you during this difficult time.

- Darlene

[Pharaoh]

177. So Sorry King crimson

What can I say.............:cry:

[BurtWorm]

178. How awful to be angry and in grief.

I feel for you. Please stay in touch with your friends!

[trotsky]

179. My deepest condolences on the loss of your true love.

I hope you can secure some justice.

[HeeBGBz]

180. I'm so sorry about the loss of your dear wife

Health care in this country sucks unless you have Big Money Insurance.

[redwitch]

181. I am so sorry to hear this.

Rest in Peace Sandy.

[connecticut yankee]

182. My deepest sympathies

and condolences to you.

What you've gone through is devastating, but I sincerely hope your memories of your wife will sustain you through the years.

[erinlough]

183. Please accept my sincere condolence

Your story brings back watching my sister die from this terrible disease. It is a loss that has never passed for me but has become bearable after two years. I still cry, I still talk to her, I still see her in my mind. There is nothing that can lessen your pain right now just know that I know how terrible and lonely it can be and I will be thinking of you. There is a bereavement group right here on DU. It helped me.

Love to you
erinlough

[sutz12]

184. Very sorry to hear of your loss. Keep the faith! nt

[Glimmer of Hope]

185. I am so sorry for loss and what you experienced.

[soup]

186. I'm so sorry for your loss, K_C,

and may your dear wife rest in peace.

[Nickster]

187. My heart goes out to you my friend. I hope you find the strength you need to get through these times

[austinboy]

188. So sorry to read about the loss of your wife

My thoughts are with you and yours during this most difficult time.

[Th1onein]

189. I am so sorry.

Please take care of yourself.

[TorchTheWitch]

190. I'm so terribly sorry for you dear!

Words are so inadaquate. I wish I could reach through the computer and hug your pain away. Let us know if there is anything at all we can do to help you.

Great Big Hugs... :hug:

[Wetzelbill]

192. my condolences...

You and your wife will be in my thoughts.

[mnhtnbb]

193. What an agonizing experience for you. I am so sorry for your loss.

Please, gather friends and family around you who can help you through this horrific ordeal. Let them take care of you and please, don't be hesitant to ask for help.

Talk about it. Talk about your wife. Let your anger out. Find someone you can trust to investigate the probability of various outcomes for the cancer your wife had.

I am so sorry.

[deutsey]

194. Condolences

:hug:

[atommom]

195. So sorry to hear about your loss, especially under those circumstances.

:hug:

[bluescribbler]

196. I am truly sorry for your loss

We need to show TPTB the human toll of their policies.

[The Backlash Cometh]

197. I am so terribly sorry for your loss.

Rude nurses, botched medical procedures which no other doctor wants to touch until the patient code blues, lack of communication regarding how serious the matter is...it all sounds familiar.

Write down your recollections, no matter how painful it is to do. The sooner you put the details down in writing, the more likely they can be used as a Recollectible Record in court. Make sure you get the doctor's private notes.

I'm no lawyer, by the way, just know a thing or two about asking for records as a private citizen. Oh! And if you can manage it, pay close attention to who comes to the service. If there is a good nurse that regrets what happened, they might turn up. That's when you need to be in full control of your faculties, because it might be the only time you'll get a straight story from someone.

[porphyrian]

198. Hang in there. - n/t

[etherealtruth]

199. I am so sorry for your loss

[derby378]

200. ginbarn and I mourn for your loss

:hug:

[Sweet Freedom]

201. I am so very sorry for you and your wife.

Your story is heartbreaking and the hospital's actions are inexcusable.

May I suggest that you copy and paste your first paragraph into a Word document and mail it to the president, chief administrator, board of directors, and most importantly, the office of public affairs at the hospital where your wife was "treated". I know it won't bring your wife back to you, but perhaps it will prevent this from happening to another person. And, by potentially helping others, it may help you with your feelings of hurt and anger.

Remember, we are always here for you if you ever need to "talk". :hug:

[Norquist Nemesis]

So very sorry

My thoughts and prayers are with you and for family.

[antigop]

202. I'm sorry for your loss

I am so sorry the healthcare system in this country is so pitiful.

[femrap]

203. I am very sorry for your devastating

loss of your dear loved one.

I've heard horrible things about your governor. Let's hope he is soon unable to affect other's lives in such a selfish and greedy manner.

We desperately need universal health care.

Please know that you are not alone in your anger and sadness.

[gulfcoastliberal]

204. I am sorry for your loss. I would sue for malpractice if they didn't give pain medication!

That's totally unconscionable to not administer pain medicine, and the experiences with the nurses, no doctor. I would get their names and contact an attorney. I would have fury burning through grief. That's terrible.

[KitSileya]

205. You have my condolances.

I am terribly sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.

[ThatsMyBarack]

206. My deepest sympathies to you

:hug:

[YOY]

207. Condolences don't suffice to much, but you have mine

n/t

[lectrobyte]

208. So sorry for your loss.

[aikoaiko]

209. My condolences.

[Ilsa]

210. I am deeply sorry for your loss and the way she and you were

treated. It is bad enough to watch the death of a beloved, but to be treated so poorly, especially if they knew she had only little chance for recovery, is behind comprehension.

Go with your gut instinct: if something seems wrong, then perhaps you should pursue it. But please, give yourself a chance to grieve first. We'll grieve with you.

Lots of hugs to you, King, and Peace to your wife in her passing.

[Irishonly]

211. I am so sorry

Sorry seems such an inadequate word to use right now. I am deeply saddened to hear about your loss. You have many people with you in spirit and many prayers are being said. You will always have Sandy with you in your heart. I pray that soon when your heart remembers her, you will smile.

I hope you can find help in getting to the bottom of why your wife was discharged so early. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[RedEarth]

212. I'm so sorry to hear this..........

[JCMach1]

213. So sorry

:hug:

[ninkasi]

214. I am so very, very sorry

I don't know what to say, except that my thoughts and prayers are with you. It sounds like your wife did not receive proper medical care, and I can only imagine what agony it was for you to try to get the drs to help her. Many, many loving thoughts are being sent your way. We are always here for you, truly.

[sazemisery]

215. We stand beside you in spirit and we hold you in our hearts.

[GreenPartyVoter]

216. I am so sorry! My thoughts and prayers are with you, and I hope you are able

to pursue an inquiry into the horrible mismanagement of your wife's care. :hug:

[latebloomer]

So horribly sad

I am terribly sorry for what you both have gone and are going through.

:hug:

[Mnemosyne]

218. I am so sorry King_Crimson. n/t

:grouphug::hug:

[Swede]

219. I'm so sorry for your loss King_Crimson

I've lost my mom and my sister-in-law both to liver cancer in the last six months. You and your family have my sympathies.

[prairierose]

220. I am so sorry....

I know that nothing I can say can help right now, but know that I am thinking good thoughts for you.

Some time we need to talk about medicaid and cancer. When I lost my brother a little over a year ago, I was so full of anger at this country and the fact that we are the only industrialized nation that does not have universal health care. I have an idea what you are feeling.

Take care

[hatrack]

221. God, KC, I'm so sorry!

I can't even imagine what you're going through, and all I can do is wish you healing.

[Mad_Dem_X]

222. Please accept my sincere condolences

:hug: :cry:

[Lasher]

223. Gosh, I'm sorry, man.

I wish you strength and comfort in your grief. Here is a little heart for you.

I just lost my father to the big C this past November. After a time it has helped me a little to focus as much as I can on how lucky I was to have had him with me all those years, instead of thinking how painful it is to be deprived of him now.

Lasher

[yellerpup]

224. My deepest sympathy is with you, King.

I'm sorry for your loss.

[Blue Belle]

225. I am so sorry for your loss...

My thoughts are with you. :hug:

[knitter4democracy]

226. Horrifying. Just horrifying.

If that isn't malpractice, I don't know what is. You don't discharge someone a day after operating on their liver--I should know. I am so very sorry. You should lawyer up.

[npincus]

227. I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[Turn CO Blue]

228. I am so sorry for your loss!

[Cerridwen]

229. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

You have my thoughts and prayers added to the many expressed here.

:hug:

[lumberjack_jeff]

230. I'm so very sorry. I wish words could do more.

[Sparkly]

231. Deepest sympathies, King Crimson.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss. :hug:

[yardwork]

233. I am very, very sorry for your loss

[HamdenRice]

234. My sincerest condolences nt

[momster]

235. Deep Condolences

My heart breaks for you and your wife. I pray you have someone near who can hold you and help you.

[AliceWonderland]

237. My deepest sympathy to you

Please, please take care of yourself as best you can.

[Coexist]

238. I am so sorry.

[JitterbugPerfume]

239. I am so sorry King C

I am your neighbor about 45 mi to the north

I lost my husband 9 yr ago . The pain never goes away , but it does become tolerable with time

Please take care of yourself:grouphug:

[goclark]

240. Blessings to you - Link to "The 5 Stages of Grief"

http://mt.essortment.com/stagesofgri_rvkg.htm

scroll down to see them and make a copy for your pocket.

[progressoid]

241. ...

so terribly sorry...the hearts of DU are with you.

[myrna minx]

242. I am so sorry for you loss.

:cry: :hug:

[kentuck]

243. So sorry to hear of your loss...

...and sorry to hear of the circumstances. Our thoughts are with you...

[maveric]

244. I'm so very sorry King_Crimson !

I'm lost for words.

[In Truth We Trust]

245. My sincerest sypathies. Honor her memory as she would have you do so. Love and peace to you.

[Goblinmonger]

246. I am so sorry

I can only imagine what you are going through now.

[ProfessorGAC]

247. My Deepest Condolences, KC

Very sorry, indeed.
GAC

[Land Shark]

248. my heart does out to you; so sorry to hear of this; i hope you will be well

[vireo]

249. A heart for you KC

And my sincere condolences. It might be helpful for you to visit DU's Bereavement Group.

[laruemtt]

250. i am so sorry, King_Crimson.

for what it's worth, please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

[Coventina]

251. My deepest condolences. We stand with you. You are loved.

Your story is shocking.

Right now you need to take care of yourself. But as soon as you can, you should write down everything that happened, and the times it happened. Get your wife's medical records from anyone who may have them, her doctors, the hospital, etc.

It does sound like your wife was neglected. When the time comes, you should tell your wife's story to anyone who will listen. And also consult a lawyer. Line up witnesses, friends, family, etc.

DU will be behind you all the way.

[laundry_queen]

252. I'm so very sorry. n/t

[Burma Jones]

253. I am so sorry for your loss

[roamer65]

254. My deepest sympathy...

goes out to you, King. Hang in there. :hug:

[volstork]

255. Deeply sorry for your loss.

[InvisibleTouch]

256. So sorry to hear this.

Whenever I hear a terrible story like this, it just reinforces my mistrust of the medical establishment. You're right to be angry. Even when someone is considered terminal, the hospital has a responsibility to make their passing as painless and peaceful as they can, and they clearly did not do this for you and your wife. There's no excuse for that. When you're up to it, do think seriously about holding these bastards accountable. It won't bring your wife back, but it might affect some justice.

[Mz Pip]

257. There are no words

:cry:

Mz Pip
:dem:

[Kadie]

258. I am so sorry.

You will be in our thoughts.

:hug:

[Momgonepostal]

259. Very sad! My condolences. nt

[wryter2000]

260. I'm so sorry

DU's such a big place, I somehow missed your story until now. Just know that her pain is over. We're here for you. :hug:

[Sabriel]

261. Our thoughts are with you, KC

And with others facing this.

[ourbluenation]

262. Sending you virtual love right now. I'm so very, very sorry.

:grouphug:

[Miss Chybil]

263. I'm sorry, King Crimson.

What a terrible loss for you.

[Raffi Ella]

264. my heart goes out to you King Crimson.

May she rest in peace.

[EC]

265. sorry for your loss...n/t

[bigwillq]

266. I am so sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[mzmolly]

267. I am SO sorry for your loss.

Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

[Laurab]

268. I am so sorry....

:hug:

[merh]

269. My condolences to you and all of her family and loved ones.

May the love you knew, the love she had for you, help you get through this tough time and bring you comfort.

You and yours are in my prayers, may she rest in peace, free of pain.

:hug:

[schmuls]

270. Oh I am so sorry, it is so like what I went through with my companion

of 23 years, a year ago next Sunday. I won't go into the details of how we decided suing the hospital wasn't worth it, but all I can say is I know how you feel. My prayers are with you.

[Uncle Joe]

271. I am truly sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[Starbucks Anarchist]

272. My deepest condolences on your loss.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[GCP]

273. OMG, I am so sorry

Is there a hospital ombudsman you can complain to (when you feel able?) It would be nice if this didn't happen to another family because you'd made a complaint.
Peace and love
:grouphug:

[salin]

274. Deepest Condolences.

What an awful ordeal.

[MrsCheaplaugh]

275. my condolences

I'm so sorry.

[Tsiyu]

276. My condolences to you and to family and friends

Your post is tearing me up. This is the state of health care in the "Richest country on earth"

How can the NEOCons and the pharm industry and the insurance industry and the healthcare industry live with themselves? The proof is in mortality, and our mortality as Americans - unless we are the uber-rich and/or very well-insured (costing somebody some $$$$$$$$$) - is in peril.

It sickens me, and I am so sorry for what you and your wife have gone through.

:hug:

[flying_wahini]

277. how horrible, I am so sorry for your loss.

nt

[Virginia Dare]

278. My deepest condolences...

her suffering was tragic, especially if any of it could have been prevented. Hopefully, the memory of her love and your life together will give you strength and peace.

[ChickMagic]

279. I'm so sorry about your loss.

From posts you made, she sounded like a special woman and it's no
wonder she was the love of your life. She will live on your memory
of her and the memories of all her friends.Your love was the bes
possible gift you could give her.

[SharonRB]

280. I'm so sorry for your loss and the pain your wife went through

:hug:

[erpowers]

281. Sorry

I am very sorry about your loss.

[rpannier]

282. I feel for your loss

My mother died in January from cancer.

[JerseygirlCT]

283. I'm so sorry for your loss, and for all her pain

That shouldn't have happened. No one should have to suffer like that.

[sinkingfeeling]

284. I'm so very sorry for your loss. The suddeness of it all makes it so much worse.

[Monkeyman]

285. I feel your pain very much

The overwhelming feeling has still not gone away for me. I will keep you in my prayers tonight may we both heel and never forget them

[rhiannon55]

286. Oh I'm so sorry!

:hug:

[DeepModem Mom]

287. I'm so very sorry. Thanks for posting this for us.

[hiaasenrocks]

288. My condolences to you. I am very sorry to hear this. n/t

[AllyCat]

289. I'm so sorry, KC!

My deepest condolences to you and your family. Your wife knew you were there for her to the end and will know you are fighting for her from now on. Good luck to you no matter how you choose to handle this.

Blessings and hugs (and a heart) to you.

[ronnykmarshall]

290. So very, very sorry King C.

I'm also very sorry that her last moments were so painful for both you and her.

:hug:

[youthere]

291. I'm so sorry..

condolences to you and your family.

[jackstraw45]

292. So sorry for your loss.....

So sorry for your loss.....

[mentalsolstice]

293. May you cherish many happy memories of your beloved wife! n/t

[Blue_In_AK]

294. I hope you can find some peace, King_Crimson...

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[BrklynLiberal]

295. There are some losses that we just never get over. So sorry for your loss.

:grouphug: :cry:

[MedleyMisty]

296. I am so sorry

My husband is absolutely everything to me. I cannot imagine your pain at all.

I am thinking about you and I hope with all my heart that you make it through this okay.

[WI_DEM]

297. What a terrible loss and my deepest sympathies to you and yours

[Wilber_Stool]

298. So sorry for your loss........n/t

[Rainscents]

299. I am so sorry for your loss.

You have every right to be angry... our governments has no problems spending billions and billions dollars on the war, however, when it comes to helping people, they tell us to go to hell.

Prayer for you and your family.

[July]

300. I am so very sorry, King_Crimson.

You and your wife are in my thoughts.

[nonconformist]

301. I am so very sorry. nt

[ItNerd4life]

302. So very sorry. Married 21 years myself,

your loss has to be devastating. Remember the good times, they will help with the healing.

[Stockholm]

303. Breaks my heart to hear your news

My deepest condolences King Crimson. My thoughts are with you tonight.

Stockholm

[Individualist]

304. I'm so very sorry, King_Crimson

and so outraged that your wife didn't receive better care.

[bcoylepa]

305. so sorry

may all your memories be good ones

[Stinky The Clown]

306. My deepest sympathies to you and yours

How awful. How very, very awful.

[Festivito]

307. May those she touched well help each other at this time.

Medicine and justice will have to wait.

Now it is time to care for those who miss her, especially to take care of yourself - especially good care of yourself.

[Quiet_Dem_Mom]

308. I am so sorry for your loss. Peace with you during this difficult time (eom).

[Sequoia]

309. I'm very sorry for your loss

and the incompetence of that hospital angers me. God be with you King Crimson.

[NashVegas]

310. I'm So Sorry

Your loss is bad enough; that the two of you were victimized by incompetents is heartbreaking.

[bdamomma]

311. Sorry for your loss King Crimson

[BluePatriot]

312. I am sorry for your loss.

Please know that we at DU will help however we can. *hug*

[AnnieBW]

313. My Sympathies On Your Loss

May the Goddess write her name on the winds. :-(

[CabalPowered]

314. My heartfelt condolences

May the world bring you a brighter future. :hug:

[mike_c]

315. I'm so sorry for your loss, KC....

All my best to you and your family. :hug:

[CornField]

316. Deepest and heartfelt condolences.

[bigtree]

317. so very sorry, KC

hope we can be of some help

[Hubert Flottz]

318. I'm very sorry for you and your family.

[live love laugh]

319. I am so very sorry for your great loss. n/t

[lukasahero]

320. My sincere condolences

I am sorry for your loss. :cry:

[bullwinkle428]

321. I'm very sorry for your loss...

...my deepest condolences to you and your family.

[me b zola]

322. .

:hug:

[proud patriot]

323. Sending Strength

:hug:

[SEABEE Chief]

324. horrific suffering

My heart goes out to you sir. Terrible.

[debbierlus]

325. I am so sorry

There are no words

You are in my thoughts

[William769]

326. May peace be with you my friend.

:hug:

[Lugnut]

327. I'm so sorry

:hug: May she rest in peace.

[Critters2]

328. My heart breaks for you!! I am so sorry!

And angry!! I hope you find peace--and JUSTICE!! :hug:

[DoBotherMe]

329. My love to you

[philly_bob]

330. Sad -- and angry! /nt

[Desert Liberal]

331. Bless you now in your time of trial

and remember that she walks, forever young, beautiful, and free, in Summerland. She waits patiently for you in the gloaming of the soft evening of that place, and will rejoice in your joys and triumphs until you may join her there.

Hold on to the love. It never fades, her heart will always be with you.

:hug:

[nadinbrzezinski]

332. My simpathies

[Lydia Leftcoast]

333. There is nothing to do but offer you deepest sympathy and

a :hug:

[brentspeak]

334. My prayers for you and your family

[davsand]

335. Deepest sympathy on your loss.

Please know you are in our hearts and prayers.


Laura

[blues90]

336. I am so very sorry

Loosing someone is one of the most difficult things one can endure .

My brother passed away in 2001 form a rare form of liver cancer and when his insurance ran out they told him there was nothing more they could do and he ended up in a hospice on pain meds and passed away a few days later .

My wifes mother had a hysterectomy and died a few days later at home from a punctured intestine , her family went through all sorts of hell but could prove nothing , this was in county hospital .

The entire medical system is for profit , they don;t care about people .

[Fran Kubelik]

337. I am so sorry.

:hug:

[jelly]

338. I'm so sorry.

It's hard enough losing a loved one without the unforgivable way your wife was treated. I can't even imagine what you must be going through. :-( Hang in there.

[Seldona]

339. I am so sorry for your loss.

You are in our thoughts.

[Pacifist Patriot]

340. I am so very sorry. Words are totally inadequate.

[lildreamer316]

341. ...

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

I lost a fiance of eight years that I lived with...I know a small amount of what you are feeling.
Love to you and your family.

[Parche]

342. Prayers

May you find peace in knowing you had 20 wonderful years
All of us DUers must stick together
Though I know you only from DU
You have my thoughts and prayers

[Done]

343. Death is nothing at all

I have only slipped away into the next room.
I am I, and you are you,
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by the old familier name.
speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed
At the litte jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray of me.
Let my name be ever the
household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort,
Without the gost of a shadow upon it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind
becouse I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near, just round the corner.
All is well.

:hug:

[Ophelia Rising]

344. Sending lots of light and love your way.......

[Tellurian]

345. Sorry to hear of your loss, KC..

an unforgettable Valentines Day for you!

a great big heart to tuck under your pillow-

[0rganism]

346. You have my deepest sympathies, K_C

I don't know which would be harder to bear, the bereavement or the outrage. May you find healing and purpose in the days to come.

[Alamom]

347. I'm so sorry. May she rest now. n/t

[peacebaby3]

348. I'm so sorry. May peace be with you, King Crimson.

I had some questions about the care my mother received when she passed away as well. Take this time to grieve and when you are able to check into any problems or questions you may have. If you truly believe that there is a problem, I would immediately request all records so you will hopefully get an accurate copy. Maybe a close friend could help you with that part right now.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[DesertRat]

349. I am deeply sorry. You are in my thoughts and prayers. n/t

[GenDem]

350. Deepest condolences to you and yours

And may your wife be resting in peace -- free from suffering.
:hug:

[cool user name]

351. My prayers go out to you and yours.

:hug:

[Evergreen Emerald]

352. oh, I am so sorry.

You must be heart-broken. I am deeply sorry for your loss.

[smokey nj]

353. I'm so so sorry King_Crimson. You will be in my thoughts.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[graywarrior]

354. I am so sorry, King_Crimson

There can be nothing worse than going through that experience. You have my deepest sympathy.

[jimshoes]

355. Condolences

for a fellow DU'er.

[nuxvomica]

356. I am so sorry, King_Crimson

I wish you peace now and justice someday. :hug:

[CTyankee]

357. I wish I could help, bring you supper, listen to you talk about her, or

perhaps just breathe with you. Emily Dickinson wrote:

By a departing light
we see acuter, quite
than by a wick that stays.
there's something in the flight
that clarifies the light
and decks the rays.

I firmly believe that art always saves you. I found peace after my brother died suddenly in Brahms Requiem, particularly the wonderful passage, "How lovely is thy dwelling place." The soaring beauty of the music allowed me to cry myself to a certain peace I could not have found otherwise.

It's good that there is a loving community here at DU for you. I am glad you shared with us. Please let us hear from you again when you feel up to it.

[sellitman]

358. My deepest sympathies

Next year will be 20 for us and I cannot imagine. I hope time can lessen the burden.

[Nicole]

360. My condolences on your loss

I'm so sorry. :hug:

[Metta]

361. A great loss. So sad. I'll just sit here awhile with you.

I know that, one day, my beloved wife and I shall part. It's a day of inevitable suffering and grace.

[Cabcere]

364. I am so, so sorry, King_Crimson!

:cry: I can't even begin to imagine how awful that must be for you. I'm sorry your wife was not treated properly and that you both had to suffer so much as a result of that. There are really no words I can say to express my heartfelt sorrow for you (or my equally heartfelt anger at the negligence of the medical professionals who let this happen), but know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. :hug:

[JackCo]

365. I'm sorry for your loss nt.

[NC_Nurse]

366. I am so sorry King Crimson!

And I'm sorry that some of the nurses were not kind to you.

May your beloved wife rest in peace. You and yours have my deepest sympathy.

[JacksonWest]

367. Condolences. Saying a prayer for you.

[XanaDUer]

369. Our deepest sympathies...

nt.

[Jack Rabbit]

370. (((())))

[xultar]

371. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[sam kane]

372. I'm very sorry that you have had to endure this pain and loss

[madmax]

373. Very sorry for you loss.

:hug:

[The Stranger]

374. The screen malfunctions because of the overload of "heart" donations, and, needless to say,

seeing that is very, very moving.

[PurpleChez]

375. So sorry....

I can't imagine what you're feeling right now, but you are in my thoughts tonight.

[melody]

376. What a horrible, terrible way to see someone you love die

I don't blame you for being furious (I'm sure that's a pale word for what you're experiencing). Deal with the immediate, give yourself time and space to grieve, and once you've reached a relatively quiet place, go after the bastards.

[MasonJar]

377. Please accept my most earnest condolences. I shall pray for you both.

[LibertyorDeath]

378. I realize we don't know each other

but my Heart goes out to you &
I hope you can take some small comfort
in the sincere condolences of all here at DU.

You are among friends here....

[kitty1]

379. Sending you love and comfort

[SaveOurDemocracy]

380. So sorry for your loss ...

May you find some comfort in the support of family and friends. Wishing you well...

[cally]

381. I am so sorry

:cry: You're in my thoughts an prayers. :hug:

[cui bono]

382. Wow, so sorry. It's so hard when it's unexpected like that.

:hug:

[cmkramer]

383. Oh God, that's terrible!

I'm sending prayers and sympathy to you and your family and friends.

[Morgana LaFey]

384. What an unbelievably horrific story

I sincerely hope that IF you have the strength and inclination at some point and it feels like the right thing to do, you will find someone or some groups to sue til they're all blue in the face.

The horror of the whole situation just compounds the grief immeasurably, I'm sure. And the grief itself must be incalculable. I am so sorry for your loss and send positive thoughts and my prayers for comfort and healing for you and yours.

Please keep us updated on how you're doing and DON'T ever, ever be reluctant to rely on friends and family for moral support and whatever else you need, and that includes friends and "family" right here at DU.

[NEOBuckeye]

385. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss

You are in my thoughts and prayers, friend.

[LonelyLRLiberal]

386. I am very sorry, King Crimson.

It sounds like you and your wife Sandy were very close. You were lucky to have each other, and it is unfair that she is gone. I hope she is watching over you now.

[Zhade]

387. There are no words.

Our government helps kill us.

I am very sorry for your loss.

[sce56]

388. My deepest Condolences! I hope you can look back and be proud of your long time together.

I wish I had a marriage that lasted so long you both must have been doing something very right! I hope you can do what needs to be done but I also hope you don't become to bitter with your loss for life must and will go on. With out knowing all the details of your lives and the survivors, I can only hope you and your family will be able to cope with it all. Vaya con el Dios!

[VenusRising]

389. I'm so terribly sorry for your loss.

I know my tears won't offer you any peace, but I hope that you find some someday. All my love to you.

:hug::hug::hug:

[AwakeAtLast]

390. My sincere condolances to you and your family

I also live in Indiana, so I know of the insanity that has ensued in our state since the Bitch took over. I am truly sorry that your precious wife had to suffer because of the lack of compassion by those we entrust to care for us. Please know that I am praying for comfort for you and your family.

:hug: :hug::hug::hug: :hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug::hug: :hug:

[sonias]

391. I am so sorry for your loss King_Crimson

May your wife rest in peace. You need to take the time to grieve and hold your wife's memory deep in your heart. She's always with you.
:grouphug:

Sonia

[Colobo]

392. My condolences, sir

I can't imagine the feelings of sadness and despair you are feeling right now... I'm hoping time and life itself can help you overcome them, and continue living...

Again, my most sincere condolences.

[I Have A Dream]

394. I am so sorry that this happened, King_Crimson.

I wish that I could take your pain away.

:hug:

[lonestarnot]

395. What a sad thing life is sometimes.

Hang tuff King_Crimson. I am sorry for your loss.

[sleepyhead]

396. Sorry to hear this.

May your heart find peace.

[catrose]

397. I'm so sorry eom

[Dinger]

398. You Have My Sincere And Heartfelt Condolences

And I am honoroed to give this the 100th rec.
I am sending healing and comforting thoughts & prayers your way. I hope it helps.
:( :grouphug:

[The Witch]

399. Sympathy, love, support, prayers & hugs

in abundance.

All yours.

[Gman]

400. I too am sorry for your loss

Prayers for your wife, you and your family.

[dollydew]

401. Oh Good Grief

I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say. You have my prayers. This is too much. I weep for you. Again, I'm sorry.

[Dystopian]

402. Deepest sympathy...

My thoughts and prayers are with you...


peace~

[gratefultobelib]

403. I am so very sorry.

[CitizenLeft]

404. I'm so sorry

I wish there were something I or someone could say to alleviate your pain. I wish you peace of mind, which, I hope, will come in time.

[tulip]

405. Oh So Sad, sorry.

First off I am so so sorry about this. You and your wife are in my prayers. I am sorry to hear that the St. Joe Hospital gave you such poor service. That's simply inexcusable.

[tinfoilinfor2005]

406. No words.

:hug:

[Lithos]

407. Peace and strength

To you and yours in your time of grief.

:hug:

[JDPriestly]

408. Our hearts go out to you.

[Upfront]

409. So Sorry.

Words are not enough to express our sadness.

[kineneb]

410. oh, geez, I'm sorry

I just lost a good friend (and the mother of our godchildren) to liver cancer. I can only imagine how you feel. Please take care of yourself.

[stop the bleeding]

411. may both of your souls find peace

My deepest sympathy for your loss

[Maraya1969]

412. Oh Dear God I am so sorry.

Please know my best thoughts and prayers are with you.

:hug:

[Bozita]

413. My deepest sympathy goes out to you and your family.

[stanwyck]

414. This is heart-wrenching. Please know that we care

and will be thinking of you. Stay with us. Let us know how you're doing. Every day.

[lala_rawraw]

415. i am so sorry for your loss

i have lupus and I understand very intimately how cuts in medical research, care, etc., can make or break an already ill person. i know there is nothing that anyone can say to give you comfort, but my prayers are with you.

[WritersBlock]

416. I am so sorry.

I don't know you, but I wish I could hug you. May you find peace.

[williesgirl]

417. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband 6 yrs ago and it feels like it was yesterday.

I'm especially sorry your wife had to suffer. My heart goes out to you and your family/friends. Take good care of yourself now, be gentle on yourself. My first year was a complete blur and the following ones not a whole lot better.

[Oilwellian]

418. Peace & Condolences

There's a Simon & Garfunkle song called "Bookends" and there's a verse that says, "preserve your memories, they're all that's left you." I hope you find peace in your memories. Stay strong my fellow DU'er. :hug:

[pnwmom]

419. Deepest condolences, King_Crimson. Is there anything

we can do for you?

Nothing will ever make it right for your family, I know, but would you like for us to contact anyone about the Medicaid situation in your state?

[Change has come]

420. I'm so sorry to hear about Sandy.

My sincere sympathies.

[Chovexani]

421. Oh damn

My deepest condolences to you and your family. This is a goddamn travesty. If you need anything or want to take action don't hesitate to ask...one thing I can say about the DU family is we take care of our own.

Y'all are in my prayers. :hug:

[fortyfeetunder]

422. My condolences

I was so sorry and saddened to read about your wife's passing, especially under such conditions. She didn't even leave this earth without suffering in excruciating pain!!! :grr:

Thank you for sharing this story during this difficult time for you, so we know the truth about health care in Indiana, as well as in many parts of the country. It's not just another anecdote. Your descriptions are all too real.

Your plight is ammunition for us all to fight for adequate health care. No one should have gone through what your dear wife suffered.

My deepest sympathy for your and your family.

:hug:

[wicket]

423. kick

:hug:

[bonito]

424. Sad to hear this,

I hope you find peace, be well my friend.

[caledesi]

425. My thoughts are w/ you KC. This is a horrible travesty and tragedy! nt

[Marie26]

426. I'm so sorry

I hope that you have family & friends to support you though this ordeal. :hug:

[BoneDaddy]

427. My deepest condolences

I am so very sorry for your loss.

[flamingyouth]

428. I am so deeply sorry for your loss

You are in my thoughts. :hug:

[earth mom]

429. My Condolences to you and your family.

:hug:

[Crocodile Hunter]

430. I'm really sorry

I'm really, really sorry about this. I'll say some prayers.