Who Needs This Shit?

[ThomWV]

I put myself on a search through Wal Mart's on-line offerings to see if I could find the most worthless piece of shit they sell. I did this with a single thought in mind; it costs to ship something, anything, half way around the world. Cargo (container) ships are powered by diesel for the most part and in a world in which petroleum products are becoming more scarce it boggles the mind how anyone could justify shipping this piece of shit half way around the world:



What you are seeing is a "Personalized Levitating Globe: which can be yours for $34.27 at Wal Marts everywhere.

If you can find a more worthless way to burn up a precious resource please add to this posting, I look forward to seeing what you can come up with.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

1. Now I know what to get you for your birthday.

:P

[rhiannon55]

2. And how ironic that it's a globe

:wtf:

[mondo joe]

3. I think I've got you beat.

[ThomWV]

5. Dear sweet Jesus! You've found the winner.

It simply dwarfs my levitating globe.

[mondo joe]

6. The globe at least is, y'know, a globe. My item serves no practical

function whatsoever. :-)

[Buzz Clik]

7. Stupid Jeebus. Coaches should never take the field with their players.

You intimidate the opposition and spoil the players on your team.

This is why it's a bad idea for messiahs to coach. They should stick with what they know. Seriously -- who better to put in charge of snacks?

[zippy890]

27. LOL Stupid Jeebus doesnt know how to coach

:7

best laugh i've had all day!

[Atman]

11. That ain't the half of it.

Conan O'Brien featured them on his show one night. I thought it was a "bit," made up. But they're real. And you can use up more precious resources by ordering them and having them shipped to your home in fossil-fuel burning conveyances...

From something called "The Catholic Shopper."







Of course, every God-fearing Republican needs this one... Watch those hands, Jesus!



Does Jesus go all "gloves off" and knock some teeth out? If not, what the hell is he doing playing HOCKEY?



.

[donco6]

15. LOL! Jesus going all "gloves off" . . .

That one made me guffaw at my desk. People are looking . . .

[Touchdown]

17. So Jesus only plays with white kids?

Those are just creepy. Especially the golf one. :scared:

[baldguy]

45. Just what is he doing to that girl, exactly?

[fooj]

32. What would Jesus do with HIS hockey stick?

:spray:

[smtpgirl]

59. Are all Catholics all white?

I wouldn't know?

Agnostic, bordering Athiest, maybe Pagan.

[StarryNite]

61. It looks like JC is getting a little frisky

with some of them there kids. He must be a touchy, feely kinda guy. I want all the statues but I want them with a blond Jesus. Oh, and he has to have blue eyes too. But I don't want him with the ballerinas. He looks like a sissy on that one.

Sheesh! I wonder how many of those creepy things they sell. Maybe we could come up with some more ideas for them. Somebody mentioned NASCAR so maybe a bunch of JCs with the most popular NASCAR numbers on his shirt. They could even give him a mullet.

[Burma Jones]

12. Don't forget these......

and

[SteelPenguin]

25. I love it

Jesus playing keep away from kids.

[Snotcicles]

33. Am I the only one that likes this stuff? Sometime I feel like a

NASCAR fan that woke up at The Million Man March.

[SteelPenguin]

37. Well it's mass marketed so someone likes it.

It's a matter of style I guess. My mother in law likes all flowery patterns and lladro statues. Each to their own I guess. Personally I hate meaningless clutter like this, but I'm sure you'd hate something of mine that I have up. ;)

[Snotcicles]

42. I was kidding, except for that singing Bass wall plaque thingamabob. nt

[SteelPenguin]

43. Billy Bob Bass

I had that on my wall until my 2 year old determined that she loved pressing it and dancing to it....constantly...then billy bob went bye bye.

[smtpgirl]

58. Where are the NASCAR fans with Jeebus?

[pepperbear]

13. made in China, no doubt n/t

[sicksicksick_N_tired]

19. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! O!M!G!

:rofl:

[slowry]

21. Best of both.

PM me for information on ordering this Nike Special Edition Anti-Environmentalist item; significant discounts are available for orders of over 5,000 units.

[SteelPenguin]

26. Is he throwing an elbow to the 10 year old?

That's a yellow card come on!

[Buzz Clik]

40. No kidding. Prima donna messiahs really piss me off.

[smtpgirl]

56. That should be a red card, ejection from the next game as well

[jerryme1]

34. Jesus should invest in some sneakers.

[Atman]

38. Jesus SAVES. Moses invests.

:hi:

.

[Art_from_Ark]

50. What is that, some sort of award

given out at Fellowship of Christian Athletes meetings?

[ComerPerro]

54. Jesus needs to protect the ball better, its gonna get stolen. Look!

[Buzz Clik]

4. You found a novelty, but you did not find their most worthless shit.

Check out their fleet of bicycles.

By and large, it is pure trash. If you pay less than $150 for an adult bike at Walmart, you might as well just flush the money down the toilet. In six months, your repair/part replacement bill will exceed the price of the bike.

[China_cat]

8. Repair/part replacement

hospital cost or funeral.

[Buzz Clik]

9. I let my college freshman talk me into buying him a Walmart bike.

Before the end of the first semester, his derailleur fell off. I helped him take it into the bike repair shop and made him deal with the mechanic. Prognosis -- bicycle euthanasia would be cheaper than the repair.

[baldguy]

10. It costs the mark $34.27.

It costs Walmart $2.15 - including labor & shipping.

[Blue_Tires]

14. i know what some lucky dad is getting for father's day!

:rofl:

[proud2BlibKansan]

16. That's not a useless item to a world traveler

:)

[BushOut06]

18. Sure it is

If you're a world traveler and you can access the internet to order that, then you could... Oh wait, you were being sarcastic, weren't you? :7

[uppityperson]

20. What will happen to it when poles switch (N/S switches)?

[frogcycle]

22. Hey, no talk of poles switching!

Next thing you know the transgender police will be arresting everyone from Poland.

:)

[uppityperson]

23. Ufda, with a "ski" in my name, they'd have to catch me first, you bet!

[frogcycle]

47. ufda?

I am not familar with this acronym. I tried googling it but all I came up with was the "United Foundation for Disabled Archers"

http://www.uffdaclub.com/

is there anything that does not have an organization?

[Art_from_Ark]

51. I think it's some sort of Scandinavian-American expression

common to Minnesota and parts of Wisconsin

[frogcycle]

52. perhaps so

http://www.lawzone.com/half-nor/uffda.htm

[Art_from_Ark]

53. That's it!

I knew it was of Scandinavian origin, but could never quite figure out its meaning. Uff da! :hi:

[uppityperson]

55. Scandanavian expression, 1 in all expression, not Polish.

See, I even mixed up my Polish joke like a good mixed heritage mutt. I grew up in an area where Polish, German, Norwegian immigrants settled, hence a "ski" saying ufda (also spelled uffdah if one were to take time to spell it out in longhand). A little bit west of Prairie Home Companion Land.

[catmandu57]

24. There has to be an equivalent of several super hyways

running across the ocean bring supplies of plastic crap to the walmarts, kmarts, targets, dollar stores, well hell just about every store now sells merchandise made in china. There must be thousands of ships plying back and forth, think of how much fuel that takes.

[frogcycle]

30. consider this:

Japan has basically zero natural resources. But they have practically put US steelmaking out of business. Iron ore and coal are mined in the US, shipped to Japan, where they are made into steel, then shipped BACK across the ocean as I-beams, steel sheet, etc.

So the net carbon input to the atmosphere to manufacture steel is increased by all that transportation fuel burned. It is somehow economically viable to do this. And the Japanese labor costs aren't nearly as different from ours as are China's.

Something is terribly wrong with this picture.

[jerryme1]

28. In a philosophical vein, should civilization/society/people do things just because they have

the ability to do so?

[zippy890]

31. more like

should people BUY things just because they have the ability.

Under capitalism, the answer is YES! its good for the economy.
hmmm, wondering whose economy its good for.... China's?

[mondo joe]

44. Or: Does everything need to be out of NECESSITY? What about pleasure, art, entertainment?

Quite honestly, I find there's a lot of puritanism on both end of the political spectrum that disallow for anything not done out of necessity.

My issue with these sorts of things is that the US has such a disproportionate share of the world's resources that it's hard for me to see some of these purchases as purely wasteful and borne on the backs of others who are less fotrunate.

[DS1]

29. Pick up any SkyMall

my god, it's the worst cheese imaginable.

NOW! Own your own miniature Welcome to Las Vegas sign!

w00t

[Lorien]

35. Amen to that. One quick look turned up this:

http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=102092037&c=69753851



At least a globe has an educational purpose!

[ulysses]

39. the predator/prey donut! yours for only $29.95!

[Atman]

41. Actually, I find that wall hanging highly educational...

I learned what people will do for $1.25 a week in China. And what people will SPEND a couple hours of their salary on here in the United States. Shameful no matter how you look at it.

.

[goodgd_yall]

60. You mean like this? The remote-controlled...

Robotic Bull Shark?

[Chemical Bill]

36. That looks really cool!

Of course, I never shop at Walmart.

Bill

[Jed Dilligan]

46. The eject button on DVD player remotes.

Think about it. Who could possibly need that? You can only change the disc if you can physically reach the player. So why would you need to open it from across the room?

It seems like a small thing, but when you think of the millions of DVD players in the world, and the copper and plastic it takes to include a superfluous button, it starts to add up.

Whose idea was it?

[magellan]

48. That is not useless

Why, if I didn't have that little gem, my husband would find out he doesn't know how to make the dvd eject. It would crush his pride.

Have pity!

[Warren DeMontague]

49. Although I wouldn't shop at Wal-Mart for general reasons, that actually looks sorta cool.

First off, it demonstrates an important scientific principle, namely that the electromagnetic force is far stronger than the gravitational force- after all, that little magnet can overcome the gravity of the entire planet Earth.

Plus, speaking of the Planet Earth, at least it is demonstratively round- considering the flat Earth creationist fundy Christian Right whackjobs the Bush Administration has put in charge of our gov'ts "science" departments, ANY available reminder of that fact is probably a good, educational thing.

[smtpgirl]

57. I like the globe, looks like a real resource burner

but the Jeebus shit with all of the white sports players is sickening.

This galvanizes literally in my lifetime I will never shop at Wal-Mart.

I will go without

[janx]

62. I shop at Walmart for their fishing stuff.

That's about it though.

[Raine]

63. Globes are cool

I like em. B-)