Post your Scotty Limericks

[TexasLawyer]

"The Witch" suggested also posting some commemorative limericks in honor of Scott McClellan's departure. So, I thought I'd start a separate thread for this different poetic avenue. Any takers? Here's the witch's excellent limerick post:

How's about a limerick instead?
Posted by The Witch

There once was a fellow named Scotty
Who faced some dilemmas so knotty
He chose to resign
Cause when he's on the line
He looks like he needs to go potty!


OK, the challenge is on. Here's one from me:

He stands there, head big as a melon.
This butt of all jokes, he ain't tellin'
The truth-- just the angles,
And nobody mangles
A sentence like Scotty McClellan.

[oldtime dfl_er]

1. wow, good rhymin'!!

You managed to rhyme McClellan and melon! Excellent work!

http://www.cafepress.com/scarebaby/1365270

[SoCalDem]

8. There was a guy named Scotty

ongoing investigations,comment? sorry can't
Said we'd been there before
Just told us what was "impordant"
Now the conferences will be a snore
Snotty Scotty Bingo Cards are shredded

[The Witch]

2. Awww! I'm touched! Thanks! Here are some more:

"Being a Press Secretary
Is a job that can be less than merry,"
Thus Scott confessed,
"And I'm glad I can rest!
Cause it's given me bad dysentery..."

:rofl:

There once was a man named McClellan
Who was fed up with reporters' yellin'
But the ultimate crack
That broke this camel's back
Was a feisty old woman named Helen!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Patchuli]

3. There once was a man named Scott

whose face was always embarassed and hot
He had to cover the preznit's arse
whose every word was a farce
It's hard work to work for such a jerk
especially when your credibility's shot!

Not as good as your's but heck, it took about 60 seconds. My hub just said it was more haiku than limerick!

[EarlG]

4. Ooh, limericks

There was a young fellow named Scott
Who liked to dissemble a lot
We came to despise
His ridiculous lies
And his penchant to spin on the spot

[npincus]

5. here's mine:

There was a man named McClellan
Who always got the press yellin'
He was no good at lying
about warrantless spying
So chose "quitter" instead of "felon"

[paparush]

6. He're one...

We hated his ripe indignation
His lack of reconcilliation
He was such a pain,
His primary refrain
"no comment on the ongoing investigation"

[DancingBear]

7. Here ya go

There once was a man named McClellan
Who had piles of lies he was sellin'
When caught with his tricks
He did then hit the bricks
To avoid being seen with a felon

[theophilus]

9. There once was a toady named Scott

Whose pronouncements belonged in the pot.
He'd always start yellin'
When truth teller Helen
Accused him of lyin' a lot. :hi:


Thumbs up to Helen Thomas and all those who resisted the spin.

[Atman]

10. Okay...

In DC the most thankless job
Is taking questions reporters do lob
But Scotty can take it
"What the hell, I just fake it!"
And laughs at grenades that they lob.

A champion liar, McMoonface
He lies without shame or disgrace.
What's UP he calls DOWN
This preposterous clown
Then turns and storms out of the place.

But now Puffy's time here is done
As Bush looks for a new hired gun
He may wind up at FEMA
Cuz, like Abner Louima,
He's already taken it in the bum.

[Joe Fields]

11. Here's mine

There once was a man named McClellan

Who covered up for the Chief Felon

He bailed out, now he's lookin'

the stress was as bad as my cookin'

No tellin' where Scott will be gellin'

[tandot]

12. There once was a guy named McClellan

His job was to protect every White House felon
He evaded, fabricated, and lied
And he did so with arrogant pride
A sycophant to the Liar-in-Chief
Who fired him without feeling grief


edited to change it to "there once was ..."

[DS1]

13. oops

mistook limerik for haiku

[gatorboy]

14. I would post mine.

But considering it's part of an ongoing investigation, I'm afraid I cannot discuss anything at this time.

Next question....

[Plaid Adder]

15. I believe all limericks must begin with "There once was a."

So here's mine:

There once was a mealymouthed prig
Whose job was to lipstick the pig.
They kept feeding it lies,
Like so many cream pies,
And he quit when it got too damn big.

C ya,

The Plaid Adder

[cassiepriam]

16. There once was a round man named Scottie

Who thought that he was a real hottie,
Instead,
He only lied a lottie.


Ok it's bad, but it's my very first limerick :(

When they fire Cheney I will be ready with a better one.

[Arugula Latte]

17. Mine:

His spinning had became such a bore
Lyin' Scotty is now out the door
Gannon gave blow jobs
and Tony gives Snow jobs
I'm afraid it will be as before.

[karlrschneider]

18. A quick shot:

Poor Scotty, our pudgy li'l pimp
Did his best to exonerate Chimp
As Sec to the press
Made a hell of a mess
Now he shuffles away with a limp

[baby_mouse]

19. OKidoki!

There once was a man named McClellan
What really went on he weren't tellin'.
When the going got hard
He just looked like a 'tard
So he flunked the first round of expellin'!