Get a load of these Christian "values"....

[Obamarama]

I was really sort of blown away today at work by the recent actions of my Fundamentalist Evangelical Mega Church-going boss.

Last week a coworker's partner died unexpectedly. She woke up and found him near death (heart attack). She came back to work today and related her experience that morning when our boss was contacted about what was going on and that she wouldn't be in.

She was understandably distraught, and one of the officers that responded to the emergency call was kind enough to call our boss from the hospital emergency room. Apparently our boss was trying to get this woman who had just lost her S/O to WORK. She overheard the officer say to our boss very firmly, "NO MAM...there is NO WAY she can come to work today."

This woman is somewhat of a cold fish, but I never knew she was THAT cold. She goes to her fundamentalist mega church every other night, takes Bible aerobics classes at her church (what the hell ARE Bible Aerobics anyway??), takes her tykes to movies that only Focus on The Family approves, etc....

And this woman calls herself a Christain. What a fucking crock of bullshit.

[flashlighter]

1. Bible aerobics?

do the get the big hardcover ones and do curls with them?

[Marr]

2. They just wag their fingers at each other.

[nosmokes]

6. har!

that's funny. i can picture a room full of church ladies w/ their fingers in overdrive...

[blonndee]

9. LOL!!

Very nice! :rofl:

[Libby2]

12. LOL That was good!

[HCE SuiGeneris]

3. Yuck -- sounds like a drone or 'bot

:thumbsdown:

[GreenPartyVoter]

4. Some compassion. :^(

[undeterred]

5. then there's the Christian diet: Bibli - cal

LooSe 10# On ThE DiEt GoD GaVe To AdAm--BiBLiCaL $19.99

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230022567238&refid=store

Ingredients:
Barley Juice - Barley is mentioned over 30 times in the Bible; it was barley loaves that Jesus multiplied in John 6:13. The Juice contains not only vitamins and minerals but naturally occuring protein, enzymes, chlorophyll, antioxidants, and many phytochemicals. There are well over 180 known plant compounds in the barley plant. It is the type of nutrition our bodies crave but don't get enough of. Used daily the body cells respond enthusiastically. So much so that you will notice the difference!

Pomegranate Seed - I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate - Song 8:2. The research demonstrates that the pomegranate contains exceptionally high levels of antioxidants, natural estrogens, and other powerfully beneficial substances. It is no surprise that studies indicate pomegranates can help reduce LDL cholesterol, help support cardiovascular health, help diminish the effects of menopause.

Hyssopus officinalis - Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow - Ps. 51: 7. Hyssop is widely recommended by herbalists today for treatment of respiratory and digestive problems such as the common cold, asthma, acute bronchitis and cough, stomach upset, and intestinal gas.

White Kidney Bean - Take thou also unto thee wheat, and barley, and beans...three hundred and ninety days shalt thou eat thereof - Ezek 4: 9. White Kidney Bean acts as a starch blocker, inhibiting the breakdown of starch from carbohydrate foods and allowing carbs to be consumed without the full calorie intake being absorbed.

Red Wine - This cup is the new testament in my blood, which is shed for you - Luke 22:20. Has been demonstrated to be a potent anti-oxidant (about 20-50 times as effectively as vitamin C alone). It has been demonstrated to have an anti-clotting effect that prevents the formation of thrombi or blood clots believed to be a cause of heart attacks and strokes. It has also been demonstrated to have anti-cancer effects as well.

Apple Juice - Comfort me with apples... Song 2:5. Compounds in apples and apple juice called phytonutrients act in much the same way that red wine and tea do to delay the break down of LDL or "bad" cholesterol.

Mustard Seed - The kingdom of heaven is like to a agrain of mustard seed - Matt 13:31. Mustard seeds are a very good source of selenium a nutrient which has been shown to help reduce the severity of asthma, decrease some of the symptoms of rheumatoid arthritis, and help prevent cancer.

Garlic - Garlic has long been considered a herbal "wonder drug", with a reputation in folklore for preventing everything from the common cold and flu to the Plague! It can assist in managing high cholesterol levels. Modern science has shown that garlic is a powerful antibiotic.

Olive Oil - Command the children of Israel, that they bring unto thee pure oil olive beaten for the light - Lev 24:2. Olive oil is a fruit juice. The beneficial health effects of olive oil are due to both its high content of monounsaturated fatty acids and its high content of antioxidative substances. Studies have shown that olive oil offers protection against heart disease by controlling LDL ("bad") cholesterol levels while raising HDL (the "good" cholesterol) levels.

Peppermint - peppermint has been used as a general digestive aid and employed in the treatment of indigestion and intestinal colic by herbalists.

Bee Pollen - Some argue this to be the Manna provided to the Israelites. Human consumption of bee pollen is praised in other religious books, and ancient Chinese and Egyptian texts. Bee pollen rejuvenates your body, stimulates organs and glands, enhances vitality, and brings about a longer life span.


:donut:

[badgerpup]

10. "...of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate"

Pomegranate juice does make a tasty wine...don't know what you'd 'spice' it with, though. It's good all by itself. :beer: :toast:

[DinahMoeHum]

7. Megachurches = Jesusland ghettoes

n/t

[badgerpup]

8. Well, the operative phrase is 'sig other'.

I'm guessing they weren't married, so OF COURSE your fundy boss doesn't count that as important.
Gotta have those magic words pronounced over you before your relationship is 'real', you know...:sarcasm:

I am sorry for your coworker.:hug:
Loss of a sig other SUCKS...married or not. Love, caring, and commitment doesn't take account of or need the magic words, it just is.

[Obamarama]

11. I don't think that was the issue....

In the spirit of full disclosure, I am gay and my supervisor knows this. At first I was a little concerned about how she would treat me, but to her credit we have a pretty congenial, if somewhat formal professional relationship. I've never felt "judged" by her in that respect, at least at work.

I just think she's cold and clueless. She's all Jesus, Jesus, Jesus (she doesn't proselytize at work, but she's always talking about this, that and the other thing at church), and yet she couldn't find enough compassion to let the poor woman not have to worry about whether she needed to come to work or not. Seriously, what would Jesus do???

The dimwit teaches Sunday school, too, but this teacher gets a big, stinkin' F in Christian compassion.

[badgerpup]

14. No argument there.

I'm just going on how I've seen some 'christians' here react to loss of sig others if there was no contract was involved.

They didn't win any prizes for compassion either.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

13. Yep... I have a name for that magic piece of paper

By which fundies ONLY recognize a proper relationship.

It's called a "State-Issued Screwing License".


(You may applaud now--it's original.)

[Obamarama]

15. I like that!

[mmonk]

16. !

:applause: :applause: :applause: