"I bought meth but I threw it away!"

[PCIntern]

Better than "I didn't inhale."

BWAHAHAHAHA.

and this classic: "I never had sex with him".

[SmokingJacket]

1. Totally, totally classic.

We should put together a book of them.

[shadowknows69]

2. It's Clinton's fault

He set the precedent for Bullshit drug use denials lol.

[Cessna Invesco Palin]

3. I didn't inhale...

...his member.

:hide:

[Drifter]

4. Uh Oh ... looks like we get another meaning ...

of the word "is".

Cheers
Drifter

[AzDar]

5. Yesssss. REPEATEDLY.

:eyes:

[Marnieworld]

or...

Saying I blew him but I didn't swallow.

It's friday afternoon. I work a little blue! :P

[shadowknows69]

8. Almost made me spray coffee on my monitor with that one

Or would that be "spurt" coffee.

[Hubert Flottz]

6. If he bought it he committed a crime.

And can we take his word that he didn't give it to some kids he was trying to "Impress?" Can we take the word of an admitted drug dealer?(trafficker)

[tridim]

15. Didn't the voice mail recordings reference "we"?

As in, "We want the stuff"?

Who is we?

[Hubert Flottz]

23. distribute

1. to divide and give out in shares; deal out; allot.
2. to disperse through a space or over an area; spread; scatter.
3. to promote, sell, and ship or deliver (an item or line of merchandise) to individual customers, esp. in a specified region or area.
4. to pass out or deliver (mail, newspapers, etc.) to intended recipients.
5. to divide into distinct phases: The process was distributed into three stages.
6. to divide into classes: These plants are distributed into 22 classes.
7. Logic. to employ (a term) in a proposition so as to refer to all individuals denoted by the term.
8. Physical Chemistry. to dissolve uniformly in a solvent consisting of layers of immiscible or partially miscible substances.
9. Printing. a. to roll out (ink) on the table to attain the proper consistency.
b. to return (type) to the proper place after printing.

[valerief]

7. So why did he have to buy meth off a gay hooker? Hmm. nt

[Rick Myers]

9. He admitted to a felony!!!

And there is voice mail evidence that he bought it REPEATEDLY!!! He talks about 'supply' and 'inventory.'

[Marnieworld]

12. yah that voicemail reveals a habit and familiarity

He was obviously speaking in a regular code. Wants to make sure of the deal a week or so in advance. Doesn't sound like one time to me.

[kilaana]

28. "I was just calling to see if we could get any more"

Here's the text of one of the voicemails, clearly indicating he wanted to purchase more. Why would he buy meth, throw it away (yeah, right) and then buy more??

“Hi Mike, this is Art,” one call began. “Hey, I was just calling to see if we could get any more. Either $100 or $200 supply.”

[mhatrw]

10. He crushed it and chopped it all up because he was mad at it!

[Phillycat]

30. And then he angrily smoked it!

He was REALLY mad at it!

[City Lights]

11. He called Jones based on a recommendation from the hotel.

What hotel hands out the name of a male prostitute when a guest calls and asks for the name of a masseuse? :rofl:

[PCIntern]

13. Don't all concierges do that?

...you know what they say in the Hotel/Prostitute business: The tip's the best part.

[Beetwasher]

18. Well, To Be Fair, The Hotel Did Say He Had the Best Meth Around

n/t

[malaise]

33. And for his first massage

he asks for meth! :rofl: :rofl:

[mhatrw]

49. deep tissue massage n/t

[BR_Parkway]

14. Ah meth - the classic "starter" drug for the curious to try, didn't Nancy

Reagan warn us about this? First they try meth, then move up to marijuana, and then the hard liquor? Shoulda just said No Reverend.

And of course I believe you when you say massage only, even though he's an escort, not a massage therapist.

And of course I believe you when 24 hours ago you said you didn't even know the man, but today you recall having bought some drugs and gotten a massage from him.

[PCIntern]

16. A Massage from the Swedish Prime Minister...

Sweet Jesus, could this all get any weirder?

[Phillycat]

31. I haven't laughed this hard in months.

You cannot make this shit up. PRICELESS. :rofl:

[Matariki]

17. because of course buying meth is much more forgivable than being gay

:eyes:

[Redstone]

19. Hey, we've ALL done that, haven't we?

Redstone

[Tempest]

20. Special orders don't upset us!

Meth, massage, hold the sex. Will that be for here or to go?

[Phillycat]

32. This thread is killing me.

:rofl:

[Beetwasher]

21. Aw, Leave Him Alone Already!

He's just a compulsive shopper, that's all.

[DoYouEverWonder]

22. That has to be one of the lamest excuses

in history.

[The Stranger]

24. They waited to see what evidence Jones HAD, then ADMITTED ONLY TO THAT.

It is elementary, really. The voice mails only talk about Meth, and Jones failed the lie detector test.

A good job was done by the gay pastor's people.

[Pattib]

25. Exactly...he also said he was glad the accuser failed the lie detector test..

He was so smug sitting in his car with his fake smile...was that his wife in the car with him? He looked like a deer in the headlights when the reporter asked him where he got the guys name to give him a massage. He said it was a referral from the hotel. The reporter knew he was lying and then drops the bomb, which hotel? Of course he said he couldn't remember. Right. I can't believe his wife was just sitting there, all calm and collected.

[malaise]

35. No

Yesterday he said he never met the guy.

[The Stranger]

36. That is because of the voicemails.

Jones has no hard proof they had sex. And they'll bury Jones before too long. It is going to be another Rush Limbaugh drug problem.

[malaise]

39. True n/t

[NJCher]

26. questions

I just got home from work a short while ago.

What tapes are you guys talking about? Where are these tapes? Please don't tell me I have to watch CNN.

And where is a link on the gay masseuse not passing the lie detector?




Cher

[Stardust]

27. Mmm Hmmm.... riiiiiight.... shhhhhhhure...I believe you... Uh huh...

And of course you needed $200s worth for your starter snort. Fuckwad.

[mhatrw]

38. First he bought a $100 bag to throw out.

After that, he was hooked. He just had to keep throwing out more and more!

[Stardust]

44. LOL!

:rofl: :toast:

[malaise]

29. Remember that yesterday

he did not know the man. Today we have a different story. Haggard is lying.

[IHaveADream]

34. I have sinned!!!

[roamer65]

37. The devil...no the Clenis made me do it!!!

[mtnester]

40. And I am the Queen of England

Believe me?

Thought not.

I do not know which is worse, his hypocrisy or his abject stupidity.

[ecstatic]

41. OMG, I just saw the interview clip w/ Haggard!

This guy was smiling the entire time while he spouted lies!! The word "psychopath" comes to mind...

I don't care how much meth you stick in front of my face, I would not be "tempted" to use it, nor would I buy it in the first place. Now it's time to figure out what other drugs Mr. Haggard uses, to get to the point where he'd buy meth. Unbelievable!! WOW, just WOW!! LMAO

[ecstatic]

42. Also, there are millions? of people doing jail time right now for drug use

and/or possession.

I hope he is dealt with to the fullest extent of the law. I hope he doesn't get special treatment.

[Mr_Spock]

43. That is such a ridiculous statement

I can't believe he would say such a thing.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

45. Know What I Absolutely Love The MOST About That Comment?

The fact that it is a blatant lie, coupled with the fact that 'not doing drugs' is not listed in the ten commandments, but 'Thou Shalt Not Lie' is...

[greenbriar]

46. told ya he didn't resign for nothing

he is guilty as hell

[Imagevision]

47. I wonder who Gannon was servicing in the White House, Rove? Bush??

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

48. Ya, when I buy meth, and see that it's past its expiration date, I do the same thing..

LOL :rofl:

[Gabi Hayes]

50. Craig Ferguson tonight on his TV show:

''I had it in my mouth, but I didn't inhale!''

now THAT was funny...audience went ape