Does Anyone Here Know About Adoption in the US?

[leftyladyfrommo]

I have a friend who is in the process of adopting a newborn. It is costing them about $50,000.

The child is being born in Florida so there is a $6500 fee for Missouri and another $6500 fee for Florida. I have no idea where the rest of that money is going. They have talked to the mother several times. And they will go to Florida when the baby is born.

Doesn't this sound like an awful lot of money?

It is really sad because these people want a baby so bad that they would pay anything.

[Bunny]

1. I know very little about this, but could some of their costs be going

toward medical care and living expenses for the birth mother? I know you're not allowed to outright buy a baby, but I think you're allowed to pay reasonable expenses. I'm sure others here will know more than I do.

[Warpy]

6. The adoption agencies used to pick up the tab

and part of the adoption fee for the agency was reimbursement for hospital expenses.

$50,000 doesn't sound out of line. It was $30,000 when friends adopted nearly 20 years ago.

[jobycom]

2. I'm quite sure my parents didn't pay that much for me

And I'm even more sure they wouldn't have paid that much for my sister! :rofl: (Sorry, adoption humor).

But that was 40 years ago. Google charities like "Catholic Charities" and see the procedure.

[leftyladyfrommo]

3. I guess it cost them about $20,000 more to get an infant. n/t

[jobycom]

11. I was an infant. nt

[wellstone dem]

4. in addition to sw fees

includes court fees, mothers prenatal care, sometimes prenatal housing and food costs, costs of birth, etc. They should ask their lawyer for a breakdown in fees.

[leftyladyfrommo]

5. I'm sure they have looked over the fees. I am just kind of

worried. This just seems like so much money.

[MiaCulpa]

7. That does sound like a lot of money

I have a cousin who adopted from Romania, and that's about what she had to pay with all the expenses involved with an overseas adoption. I *thought* that it was cheaper here in the US, with the fewer very young infats - toddler aged children available, and so many people on waiting lists.

[Autumn Colors]

8. I'd be willing to be that ....

a) older children
b) non-white babies/children
c) children with special needs

are a whole lot less expensive to adopt. Sad, really.

[wellstone dem]

12. I adopted my daughter who was 9, best investment ever

the adoption didn't cost anything and she has made her value clear over and over. She'd been in foster care for half her life.

Today, I'm at her college, visiting her. Last night we went to "Take Back the Night" together and both wept as she put on the ribbon for "survivor". Every day I find new reasons to be proud of her. I'm so glad I did not adopt an infant. It wouldn't have been her. I am so fortunate.

[Autumn Colors]

13. Hats off to you!

There are so many children languishing in the foster care system waiting to be adopted who just aren't lucky enough to be white, healthy, or infants. So many who need homes, yet all these couples go and spend a fortune just to get a white infant.

And my sister and her husband are among that group above. They spent about $20,000 (between fees and plane tickets, etc) to adopt a 7-year-old (white) boy from Russia last year.

[SmokingJacket]

9. I believe that is a bit on the high side.

My friend adopted recently and I think it was around $30K, for a domestic infant.

[kwassa]

10. We are in the process, it will be about $20,000

for a domestic adoption, sliding scale based on income.

The fees are really for running the agency, which is highly regarded around here.

Older children can be adopted for free, through a special state program.

This is in Maryland. Laws vary a lot though, from state to state.

[TexasLawyer]

14. Is this through an adoption agency?

A lot of agencies really gouge the couples they work with.

My husband and I adopted our three children privately. (Not through agencies). It did not cost nearly that much money. (More like $10-20 thousand per adoption).

[leftyladyfrommo]

15. Yes, it is an agency.

I think it is called American Adoptions - but I'm not too sure of that.

[radwriter0555]

16. the shame is the ridiculous amount it costs. What's more shameful is the

incredibly stupid and risky procedures people endure to GIVE birth, when there are so many millions of children around the world who need homes.

I find fertility treatments to be quite selfish, but I also see them as a somewhat necessary evil when faced with shelling out 50K to adopt a child who needs a home.

Double edged sword.