Racism still exists..

[undergroundpanther]

I was going to a family wedding(not my side the Ex's side). She worked in a republican senators office as some sort of secretarial thing apparently.He offered to let her have her wedding at the country club he belonged to.She took his offer.

Upon hearing her wedding venue I was told how I should dress,that my purple hair may offend and deny me admission (it was not the brides rules it was the "conservative country clubs rules) I was really put off.I went because It was an obligation.I didn't change my hair.I got in anyway.I had to wear a dress and I was terribly uncomfortable the whole time. For if I wore more masculine clothes I would not be permitted in,apparently females dressing like men was more offensive than a purple Mohawk.

The wedding reception was nice,food was good.
The decor was so fancy, they had big huge antique chandeliers ,the band was so "white" I couldn't dance to it at all.Outside the back door there was a big marble balcony, there was a golf course all land scaped,the place looked like a historic plantation house.

And it was more like a plantation the more I asked around.

There were NO black people in the club..the only blacks there were janitors and white gloved servants.They were being supervised by white people. It seemed kinda weird to me how quiet and invisible they were.

I was in the bathroom alone. So I had a candid moment with a black janitor emptying the trashcan.
I asked her what kind of place IS this?,she said a very exclusive and conservative club. I asked how might one become a member here?..And she rattled off a list of requirements that made me wanna gag..

FIRST they check into your background.Are you loyal to the US the president? Than they want to know your family names on both sides to determine ,racial heritage . They want to know your income status.And your political affiliations.Next they want to make sure all the women act like submissive trophy wives and the men are good ole boys. I could not get in unless I was recommended by a male member first.I had to swear to be absolutely STRAIGHT,no queers allowed in there you know .
My Mohawk would have to go I would not be permitted to wear certain clothes,anymore like jeans or t shirts, or pants for that matter.The pierces would have to go and I would have to state I belong to a church, and prove it was a CHRISTIAN in one of a few allowed denominations.

I asked this janitor how she felt working for such scumbag racists,and she didn't say anything.
I felt disgusted,like I was covered in slime being in that place. I was so glad to get out of there,when the shindig was over.

If anyone tries to tell you racism,homophobia and sexism does not exist in high places in con-servo land they are full of shit.
It's STILL institutionalized, yet it's spoken of in a nod-nod,wink-wink sort of way.It's truly disgusting.

Also at the Hillsville Flea Market in Virginia ,which is a KICK ASS flea market BTW except for a few things like.... the frickin KLAN hands out leaflets there every year.Some yahoos stand around in a klan booth handing out their shit.Sometimes White Power groups are there too. Some of these racist idiots sell Nazi shit and every ass selling it treats it like a sacred relic.It's obscene. You can buy ugly racist teeshirts there, I ride with Forrester bumper trash ,next to jesus fish..Racist authors sell their books too.I bought the turner diaries (since everyone tells me how subversive that book is)there , I tried to read it for giggles-n-shits but it is the most boring read EVER and it's stupid, I couldn't finish it it was so lame..So I used it for kindling.

What I am describing here,it's for real.I kid you not. The racism of the south isn't gone,it's just lurking over to the side, stage right,quietly,playing nice,waiting for the chance to claim center stage again to legitamize hate and kill people again.

Bully thugs used to having privilege,they never get over themselves and never want to give up privileges you know..They write stupid shit like turner diaries and fly confederate flags and yell Rahowa,and they look like complete bitter little boy fools as far as I am concerned.Scary thing is some of these little bitter children who never grew up got enough money and PR skill to run for senate seats and other places of power and hide what they are with a nod and a wink..

Anybody else got a story to share?

[proud2BlibKansan]

1. Is George Allen a member of that club?

:)

[ComerPerro]

2. You want to see racism on display? Date someone from another race

especially if you are white, try dating a black person.

My finacee is black, and some of the looks we get (from both races) are just astounding.

But here's the interesting thing:


Think back on your racist friends, and relatives, and then look at how they act around you now.

Suddenly, the racist comments stop when you're around, even in your SO isn't.

But people don't just change overnight.


In my example, my brother still hears my family members say racist shit, but he says its now after I've left the room. Its never about me or my finacee, just racist crap in general, but it always stops when I'm around.


Not only does this illustrate how racism is alive and well, but it also indicates to me that these people know what they are saying is wrong, and they are ashamed.

[twilight_sailing]

7. You're so right

Racists are silent these days, except when they are sure they are among their own.

[ComerPerro]

15. Kind of unrelated, but I just remembered this

one of the most unracist things I have ever heard.

My friends and I were talking about race for some reason, and my brother responded to something I said with "who do you know that's black?"

Then he paused a minute, and said "Oh yeah"


At that point it occured to me that he didn't really see her skin color, it didn't even factor into his thinking at any level.

[SmokingJacket]

27. It's coming out more and more, though.

My republican family lets the remarks fly these days... never used to. Apparently "permission" has been granted.

[ThomCat]

12. I remember being one of a very small group

of jewish kids in town. There was also only a very small group of black kids in town. I asked one of the girls to be my date for the senior ball. I was shocked by how much it was talked about.

"The jewish boy is dating a black girl!"
"You don't really think you lover her, do you? It's okay as long as you're just going as friends."

The prejudice was so obvious I felt like I was continuously slapped in the face by it. Over and over again for several months before the senior ball I kept hearing second and third hand about everyone asking if I had really asked her out, and what was our real relationship, and how serious was it, and what did our families think, etc. Some people would stare at me as I walked down the hall in School.

You can't convince me that racism is dead. It was alive and well, and I see no signs that it's even slowing down.

[ComerPerro]

14. when you're white, dating minorities just is not done

[ThomCat]

16. Silly me. I didn't realize that.

And by the time I was informed, I was too damned stuborn to listen to their bullshit or care. I had a date for the senior ball, she was gorgeous and a good friend of mine, and I intended to have a great time.
:)

[ComerPerro]

19. Yeah, you really dropped the ball on that one

me too.

Best decision I ever made.

[Bucky]

75. My experience is far far different.

I see interracial couples all the time--mind you, this is in Houston. Other parts of the country may be a good deal less progressive. Anyway, I'm certain they face their challenges because of their cultural and surface differences, above and beyond the normal range of problems relationships have. But all of that for some reason doesn't seem to put a dent in the number of couples I see. Among the kids at the school I teach at, no one seems to pay any attention to race except a few fake tough-guys and the gang members.

[Hav]

24. .

You don't even have to date someone..I'm not talking about America but there are regions where you get these "looks" just for not being white or the youth screams insults at you.
So yeah, racism was never dead and will probably never go away.

[Deep13]

3. We got places like that around here...

...but they are pretty low rent like the Eagles Lodge. Rascist and misogynist.

[KingFlorez]

4. My cousin married a white man

And for financial reasons, they had to move to Northern California where her husband's father help him get a business going. They live a small mostly white town and they always have a problem with the neighbors, once it the neighbors even started a shouting match in the street.

[Sequoia]

57. I bet I know which town....

1) Santa Rosa

2) Navato

3) Petaluma

4) Other


6% black in Sonoma County with hicks driving around with their very large Confederate Flag.

[KingFlorez]

70. Further north, out in Sierra County

[Sequoia]

77. Oh well, close is only good in horseshoes...NOT!

Heh...keep on truckin'!

[Virginia Dare]

5. Absolutely and so does discrimination..

living and travelling through the south, I could give you many examples of it. Sometimes you can literally "feel" it, it makes your hair stand on end--and I'm white, I can't imagine how it must feel if you are of color.

[ThomCat]

6. I once went to a wedding like that with a friend.

She is a lesbian but not out, so I was her cover. Her brother was marrying into a wealthy family, and racism was on brutal display throughout the entire weekend. You describe it very well.

I cannot imagine ever wanting to join such a club. I can only imagine that people do it for the money. You make connections at country clubs like that. Those connections can make or break a career. If all you care about is money then you'll put your life under a microscope and put up with anything to get into that kind of position.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

8. And this is just the blatant stuff.

The more common and damaging stuff is when a teacher sends a black student to a remedial classroom for behaviour that gets dismissed when a white student does it, for example.

[jdlh8894]

9. Racism

Sorry you think this is a matter of race. This is pure D classism. I'm not sure why you felt obligated to go,but if I knew the situation ahead of time, I just would have said "Thanks,but no thanks"

[Annces]

17. ditto

[undergroundpanther]

30. I went

Because I was put on the spot by my Ex's Parents and expectations . I was in a manipulative relationship.And when you are in such a relationship and do not understand what the dynamics going on are about and how they effect you,,you have a tendency to swallow your own wants and needs and sublimate it into whatever you can do to "keep peace".. If you noticed, I said it was the EX's family!

The food was good.

And for the Hillsville Flea Market it is kick ass ,the best flea market ever. I will continue to go to that event.It stretches over five miles. It's HUGE. It's amazing all the shit they got there.I'll just leave big honking lugers in the Klan Brochures next time..Tee Hee Hee.

[jdlh8894]

34. Glad you enjoyed the food ---But

it sounds to me like you went there just to PO your X and then lord it over everyone there.

[undergroundpanther]

40. Psychoanalyze much?

No I went because I thought I had to.
Simple as that.I went because I was confused,about what was best for ME, and didn't know better at the time that going along was not in my best mental health interests because I was in a manipulative relationship.. You live you learn.I am DONE with that relationship.

Regardless I thought the club was weird ,and it was racist so I used the opportunity being in such a place,to ask around and investigate. I was very discreet.

This event is in the past . I posted it because it is an experience I had with seeing racism. What's so hard to GET about this? Why are you reading motives in my posts that I don't have?
You trying to start something? Or distract?

[ThomCat]

55. That's a bit judgemental.

And it's an unreasonable conclusion too.

When we are expected to attend a family social function most people bite their tongues and go.

[undergroundpanther]

59. I went bit my tounge

I have a right to say how uncomfortable it was for me don't I? And that I felt manipulated Don't I? It wasen't like this was close family to my ex, it was like 3rd cousin's wedding. I didn't know the bride at all,didn't know her name,the grooms name, nothing. Just that she was a cousin to someone in my Ex's family..Sometimes families DO manipulate about attendance to family functions. Sometimes the obligation is genuine and ok.. In this case I felt manipulated. And I was confused because of the nature of the relationship I was in.

It's not complicated ok?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

71. Riiiiight.

It's pure coincidence that the club members were white and the janitors and servants are black.

:eyes:

[nini]

10. I had no doubt it still existed

I only look at the Katrina aftermath to remind myself of it.


Those kinds of places/people are really nauseating. As much as they don't want me around - I do not want to be around them. Fuck 'em all.

[LeftCoast]

11. "the band was so "white" I couldn't dance to it at all"

Racism sucks

[undergroundpanther]

41. It was

White as in stiff ,formal.Old white guys...
BTW I am white. mixed race who looks very white.Blue eyes pale skin.
Yeah I am a white, white racist.Geez.

[Annces]

13. Many people don't stray too far from their original homestead.

Lots of blacks and Hispanics would love to live in privileged areas too, and do when they can make the bucks. You think you would be accepted any better in a large black wedding or Latino wedding? Being clannish is a human condition.

[Karenina]

51. Blacks and Hispanics are MUCH MORE tolerant

due to miscegenation. Be VERY careful, you might be looking askance at someone's SISTER. ;-)

My cousin's "Verein" came to my town for a visit. She told everyone her cousin would join the festivities at the Brauhaus. I took a seat next to her and the guy across from me said, "Welcome Cuz!" without batting an eyelash. Someone at the other end of the table shouted, "Who's SHE? I thought you said your COUSIN was coming!" I heard him yelp and am certain BOTH of his legs were black and blue. :rofl:

I'm quite aware of how white female partners of black males may be received at such a gathering. Let them show up with a kid in tow and woe be it to anyone who would DARE diss the little angel's mother. Dontchoo be talkin' about nobody's mama. ;-)

[Cleita]

74. Speaking for Latinos, we welcome most anyone to our

celebrations and into our society. "Mi casa es su casa" is not an empty phrase. Those who say it mean it. When I lived in Chile, the Chileans went out of their way to bring wall flowers into the party and to include any new arrivals in the social life of the area including Americans and other foreigners. They considered it a silent rule to make everyone welcome.

It's not much different here. If you live in a hispanic neighborhood and act friendly you will be welcomed and accepted as part of the neighborhood.

[Karenina]

80. And ah, those dreaded Muslims...

I've been to Turkish weddings, played with Gnaua masters, hung out in the park with the North African drummers, discussed politics with (gasp) Iraqis and Iranians... First, we eat WONDERFUL FOOD together, second, that I'm an Ami, female and black is IRRELEVANT as our commonalities outweigh our differences (we holler, wave our hands, get in each others' faces, I know the drill now and have no fear) third, it is only WHITE SOCIETY that requires such a high level of assimilation skills dependent on your skin tone or origins. If they are not just "so" entry will be denied.

[Cleita]

82. I shouldn't say this out loud in a mostly white forum, but

they really are missing out on a lot of really pleasurable moments in their efforts not to assimilate.

[wanpete]

18. I, for one, have never believed that it has ever gone away...

things have changed some, but there is still much, much progress left to go...

[ComerPerro]

20. Its still alive and well, it just became more hidden

people aren't as open about their racism as they used to be becasue they know people don't tolerate that shit.

EDIT: personal story. I worked in a store where I was supervising cashiers, and I had some guy come up and complain to me and demand to see the manager. Apparently he had reffered to another customer (out of earshot) as a nigger, and assumed the white cashier would appreciate the comment. She didn't, and she told him she would not finish the transaction as long as he used that language around her.

Of course, I found that out while he was recounting his angry story to the manager.

My manager asked him to leave.

[pampango]

21. I see that you changed this post from an indictment of the South

to one of the country as a whole. Southerners won't need to be as defensive this time.

[ComerPerro]

22. I see no evidence of an edit

[Behind the Aegis]

23. The other poster was referencing this...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=364x2231634

Although, this version still slightly denigrates one area, it wasn't like the other one because of the title.

[ComerPerro]

25. HaHaHa! Southerners don't like being reminded they live in a racist area

but they never have any problem reminding me that I am surrounded by anti-Evolution crowds and Fred Phelps...

[Behind the Aegis]

26. I fail to see how it is funny.

Just as attacks on other regions are broad-brushed, so are the attacks on the South. It is not a matter of being reminded of it, we know we live here. But often, we see broad remarks as if to indicate that those of us who live in the South, especially by choice, are some how deficient, or perhaps racists ourselves.

[undergroundpanther]

35. Haha har..

Non racist southerners DO NOT need to be reminded about the racists down south. But maybe some southern hating bigots who call themselves liberals need to be reminded how class-ism is just as ugly as racism. Get my drift?
My family is from the South dude. There are bigots in my family whom embarrass the hell out of me,and we argue everytime we see each other..They have hurt me and also in my family there are some very liberal open minded people too whom I adore. It's a mixed situation in this just like it is everywhere else.

[FILAM23]

39. Having lived in both the North and the South

I say racisim is more prevelant up North,
just more open in the South

[undergroundpanther]

33. I said

My original post said down south because THAT is WHERE these two events occurred. No other reason. Virginia and North Carolina, last time I checked those were southern states.The South has racist elements as does everywhere else.Wherever racism or other hate based ISMS crops up it is sickening.. Are you gonna harp on the location to OBSCURE the message now?
I changed what I originally posted because the mods noticed it offended people. It was not my intent to offend people.. Look,if it WAS my intent to offend southerners I would NOT have edited the post and reposted it again,dear. NOw,can we MOVE ON. And discuss RACISM?

BTW I am an appalachian American,Some of my folks are from grayson County and Wise Co. In Galax Virginia there is a STREET named after our Family.We are Melungeons. Sheesh.I know the south.Don't live there but I know alot of good people there..And some bad ones,like everywhere else.

[Behind the Aegis]

48. You are awfully hostile, dear!

I saw the original obviously. It was the title of the former post that was problematic because it was a form of bigotry called regionalism. It didn't matter that it took place in the South and I have no issue with you saying it took place in the South. The problem I had, as did the moderator who locked it, was that it was a broad-brush remark against an entire region.

I can discuss racism all day long, but it doesn't mean I am going to excuse other forms of prejudice just because it isn't the main focus of the post. That said, it sounds like your post is more about classism than racism, albeit the two are closely linked more often than not.

[undergroundpanther]

54. The title was a bad choice

I agree.I should have thought of a better title.That was wrong of me.
Now can we move on?

[Behind the Aegis]

63. I agree.

You did think of a better title...I am now posting in that thread. The fact is that I was responding to a poster who asking about the edit, I simply gave the link. His/her reaction was mockery, which is how this sub-thread got started.

In the spirit of moving on...here are some of my stories, in brief:

After an accident, I was told to go to a certain car dealership because I could easily "Jew them down."

After 9-11, a woman in Tulsa was told to "go back to her country." She was Choctaw.

I was with a friend, African-American, and we were clothes shopping. He said he hated how he always got followed but was never asked if he needed help. After entering a store, I witnessed what he was talking about earlier. As the sales staff followed him, I "stole" $300 worth of items. As we left the store, I threw the bag back into the store and said: "You were following the wrong person, you racists pricks!"

I was threated to have my face blown off because I was a "Christ killer."

I have been called "faggot" more times than I can count. If I had a nickel for every time I was called an anti-gay name, I'd be a rich, little faggot (with hot man servants)!

I sat in a meeting and the only Black person was asked how "her people" would feel about a new proposal, to which she responded: "Which people are those? Catholics?" She was also Catholic. :)

I used to sit outside in the hallway during Christmas parties because I was Jewish and they didn't want to "offend" me. :eyes:

I was in a club and told it was "too dark." Silly me, I thought he was talking about the lighting (it was dark), but no, he was talking about the number of African-Americans that were in the club.

I was told to "speak English or get the fuck out of the country," when I was talking with a friend of mine in Spanish. I am a native speaker of English and we were having a private conversation at a Burger King table.

I was told I was not welcome in a restaurant because they didn't serve "my kind (gay)." I am easily identified as gay...spy satellites can pick it up! :evilgrin:

The above are my experiences a few of friends or things I have seen. I could go on for days. When I worked for universities, I was a presenter on diversity topics. My top three specialties: racism, homophobia, and anti-Semitism.

[undergroundpanther]

66. Oh the Irony..

You wrote..."I was with a friend, African-American, and we were clothes shopping. He said he hated how he always got followed but was never asked if he needed help. After entering a store, I witnessed what he was talking about earlier. As the sales staff followed him, I "stole" $300 worth of items. As we left the store, I threw the bag back into the store and said: "You were following the wrong person, you racists pricks!"

Heh,that kind of"incident" happened to me. I am white mind you,but like I said I got a big Mohawk,I am a punk looking thing.I have dressed this way,well,forever.I wear leather(my family has alot of bikers in it)And I got tattoos,pierces etc..
One day,I was at an upscale mall looking for a birthday gift for my niece..I went into a claire's boutique. Looked around saw nothing good she'd like there and I..moved on.
Well later on I was waiting at the bus stop to go home. Mall security came up to me with some cops. They tried to say I shoplifted something from Claire's. I told them I didn't take anything... But of course they never take a punk freak at their word,it was around halloween there were other freaky looking people at the mall.
They detained me,checked my ID, made me miss my damn bus.I had to show them the contents of my bag and the receipts. They patted me down it was NUTS.I was banned from the mall too. For doing nothing but shopping there.


Bigotry has many forms. Even on DU people made fun of Tattooed and body modified people like Cat man,whom I think is beautiful.I had to leave that thread,because I am a cat person,in process of modifying myself A trans feline.That kind of hate is a form of bigotry that hurts too but it's just aimed at individuals .Just like when some asshole makes fun of a kid's freckles or braces it is like racism or homophobia designed to tear the kid apart on the inside by hating him on the outside.It's like making a person be singled out as inferior is a root form of all hate isms and social scapegoating.. Bigoted hate of this kind is not based in race or gender or religion per se,but it is based in who you are or how you appear. And it hurts too.

[aikoaiko]

36. The most racist place I ever lived: Boston MA

Yep, Mass voters end up doing a lot of things correctly in the end, but the racial divisions of that city outlying areas is incredible. Race, sex, ethnicity discrimination is alive and well everywhere.

[WindRavenX]

78. BIG TIME

Most segregated city not in the northeast. It's disgusting :thumbsdown:

[undergroundpanther]

43. Sadly some are splitting hairs for a reason to get defensive.

Can't please everyone. Sheesh.

[Initech]

28. There's no way I could join a club like that.

They go against everything I stand for, and if I were to join a place like that, that would be the very definition of selling out.

[SmokingJacket]

29. That's why the "it's not racism, it's classism," shit burns me up.

People say that to try and imply that there is no racism anymore. But there is.

Racism and classism are two different, often over-lapping things.

[undergroundpanther]

31. Yep

The sickening ISMS of hate sometimes overlap.Racism,Classism,Mysogyny,Homophobia..ect.
It can be hard to separate them. But the presence of two or more kinds of hatred does not mean racism isn't racism.

[Donald Ian Rankin]

76. I think it's only really race and class that overlap strongly.

It's easy to distinguish them from mysogyny and homophobia - being female doesn't correlate with race or class, for obvious reasons, and being gay only does weakly.

But race and class correlate so strongly, and the prejudices related to them are so similar, that it's often hard to distiguish attitudes based on race from those based on class.

[jdlh8894]

32. I call BS ! The original OP

never stated if they were black,brown,yellow,or whatever.All that was said was that the OP had a purple Mohawk.I still do not see how this is racism.

[undergroundpanther]

38. Not BS

I am white looking. And I am mixed race..
Click on My journal if you are curious. I am also a trans man. I guess you didn't see that part?

I was speaking about racism and class ism I observed myself with my own eyes and ears at the "country club"..and I verified it further by asking a black lady working there questions about the'club'.As for the Hillsville Flea.. Every fucking year I go to it,I see the Klan handing out their recruitment shit there..Next Memorial Day go there and look around..you might see it for yourself.

This is an account of my personal experiences. I smelled racism at the country club,so I asked and found out.What's BS about that?

[FILAM23]

37. Racism is alive and well

and spread throughout the races

[cynatnite]

42. Knew a guy once who called blacks...

spear chuckers. :puke: He used the bible to justify his twisted beliefs. I called him a racist to his face and he stormed off.

Anyone who thinks racism doesn't exist is delusional.

[undergroundpanther]

45. That was the whole point of my post.

And the re edit. You live you learn.

[Cleita]

46. That's an old one and it was once openly used by

comedians in night clubs.

[novalib]

52. In the Original Version of the Movie M*A*S*H....

In the original movie of the movie M*A*S*H (with Donald Sutherland and Elliot Gould), there is a chacacter who is used as a "ringer" in the football game at the end of the movie. He's African-American, and his name is "Spearchucker" Jones.

RACISM pure and simple!

[Cleita]

44. No kidding!

Do you realize if it weren't for the GOP's race baiting, we wouldn't have ever had George Bush or any other Republican for that matter in office. You know why they hated Clinton? No. It wasn't really about Monica. It was because Clinton was comfortable around African Americans and called many of them his friends. He diverged from the southern good old boy club that Strom Thurmond and Jesse Helms were charter members of. Can't have that you know.

Do you know how Rush Limbaugh gets his listeners? He talks to them about a better time when you didn't have to lock your doors or your daughters up. When cookie baking moms stayed home with their children. Unsaid among the hyperbole is that those good old days were before affirmative action, the civil rights movement and fairer immigration laws that lifted restrictive quotes for other parts of the world other than Europe.

We are still getting the same race baiting now clothed in the skins of so-called illegal immigrants from Latin America. Now all the accusations heaped in previous times on other people of color are now being heaped on them.

[undergroundpanther]

50. I know and it is disgusting.

Same goes for people of the middle east .911 gave the bigots a target and they ran.

I remember living in Manassas. And it was a week after 911, I was at the Target. In the checkout line there was a Sikh family behind me(the guy had the grey turban on that some Sikhs wear).. This guts and glory dude was in front of me, I was sandwiched between them.The line was long so there was wait time.
The guy in front of me kept looking past me he was saying the most crude hateful shit to the Sikh people,Then their little boy started to cry his mom hugged him and tried to discreetly comfort him..That's when I lost it.
I looked at the asshole,said something along the lines of You ignorant fuck face,Do you know what a Sikh is? Sikhs, They are from INDIA. See ,she is wearing a SARI,dumb ass,they are NOT terra-ists.. They are human beings, not sand Ni--ers!You racist piece of shit!Middle eastern people are human beings too in case you are too much of a bigot to notice you fucking psychopath paranoid fuck! Fuck you and shut the hell up.

Well security showed up,the guy glared at me,looked like his forehead veins were gonna pop,he got all red, finished paying and hung around by the exit until security shooed him off.I guess he was waiting to kick my ass. However..knowing that ass might be in the parking lot,I walked with the Sikh family to their car,and noticed new pro american stickers were plastered all over it and yellow magnetic ribbons. I was grieved to see how threatened they must of felt.
I felt like crying.When I got to my car, I did.

[deaniac21]

47. That was one well informed janitor!

[undergroundpanther]

53. I know.

She told me sometimes people looking to join the club do ask her questions. It's, I guess, one way people may try to get the skinny on how to get in. I dunno. Networking can be weird sometimes Maybe she has seen thier policy books? I don't know.I told her I had no interest in joining that I was just curious,after she answered my questions..

[lgn19087]

83. You want to know about an organization

talk to the janitors, the secretaries, the filing clerks...you'll get way more out of these people than any of the pompous and pristine "higherups"

[novalib]

49. ME TOO!!! I've Been To Places JUST LIKE THAT!

I, too, have been to two different weddeing receptions at the same sort of snobbish all-white sickeningly conservative clubs like you describe.

THEY ARE HORRIBLE!!!!! --- TRULY AWFUL!

It was like a KLAN Gathering -- except no one had on a hood. Instead, the women all wore pearls and they all had the blond hair-do that Stepford Wives all have.

And the men were all white and all paunchy and all creepy.

They all treated the African-American staff like pure shit. They laughed at the Latino/Latina staff members and called them all sorts of unspeakable names.

They purposely trashed the place, laughing that "Conchita (as they called the Latinas) would have to clean it up.

They all got real sloppy drunk.

It was AWFUL!

[undergroundpanther]

56. That's what I was trying to explain

But it seems people just want to call me racist for the way I worded it.The OP title was bad,I regret the way I put it,but it does not diminish the real point,about the racism that still is around..and the country club crap. all I can say is WTF?

[novalib]

58. You Did An OUTSTANDING JOB!!!

You did a great job with the way you worded things.

Don't let the bastards get you down!!

Some of us understand what you said, and know that it is TRUE!

[Sammy Pepys]

60. Hey, it was their wedding...

The reception was nice and the food was good. That alone is a rarity at weddings nowadays.

And lots of wedding bands suck. Black and white....

[undergroundpanther]

62. The better weddings I been to

tend to go with D.J's.
My sisters wedding was awesome. It was a biker wedding.there must have been 500 Harley's there.If you ever have the chance to go to a biker wedding,GO. I had a ball! 3 days long party& bull roast held outdoors. 0% uptight ,3 %formal(bride and groom (only part of the time)and preacher dressed up)!
Where else can you eat your chunk of wedding cake skewered on your buck knife,and say fuck the crumbs?

[Sammy Pepys]

64. hehe....I'll pass...n/t

....

[Cleita]

61. I just remembered another story.

I once worked for a man who was a member of the Los Angeles Country club. One of my co-workers was a light skinned Latina like me, whose married names weren't Spanish, so we passed. The third girl in our office was Jewish. Well, the boss took the other Latina and me aside one day and asked us if we would like to come to a luncheon that he was throwing for an employee that had completed ten years.

"However, don't tell Judy," he said. "She can't come because she's Jewish and the club doesn't allow it."

My co-worker and I were sort of stunned. We discussed it among ourselves and decided to tell the boss that we were Latinas and stand in solidarity with Judy. He was of course speechless.

"Well, I would never have taken you two for...". He turned and walked away. It was never discussed again. I subsequently found out that the same country club wouldn't allow movie people in either because the old money members wouldn't have it.

I understand that the Los Angeles Country Club has been forced to change their policies since then due to affirmative action and other laws, but I just remembered this now.

[Bucky]

65. I'm offended when you say "the band was so white I couldn't dance to it"

The place does not sound fun. And yes, there's still rampant racism in our society--altho it's quieter, it's probably more institutionalized than it's ever been. It's part of a system of keeping all people down--classism, union-busting, HMO bureaucracies, neighborhood segregation, and the ongoing opposition to workable public transportation systems in most major cities.

The Turner Diaries--it's pretty insignificant. Those kind of people, while a nuisense and certainly scary when angered, aren't much of a threat to society. They're a faint echo of the real problem--which is found at banks, in police stations, in underfunded (and still mostly segregated) schools, and at employment offices.

I do have to ping you about that "band so white" line however. As a white person, I find it pretty offensive to have my race used as a synonym for "untalented and unenjoyable." I know it's a common stereotype and you meant no harm by it, but words and ideas matter--and think how you feel when people use your race as a synonym for something negative.

[ThomCat]

67. It could also simply mean

that the music was so culturally specific that it was hard to identify with and enjoy. "White" didn't seem to me to be a synonym for untalented and unenjoyable.
:shrug:

[undergroundpanther]

68. Thom

thanks for clarifying that for me for the other poster... Thom's definition is the one I meant.I couldn't identify with the band. I dunno how to waltz.I couldn't identify a waltz if my life depended on it from other similar types of formal music.I certainly don't know how to dance to it. I don't think any of those guys in that band would feel all that culturally competent in a mosh pit or doing poi at a rave either.;)

[undergroundpanther]

69. Ummm

I look white, poor & white,with bikers in the family,some would call me"white trash".BTW.But in reality I am mixed race,melungeon from appalachia.The model for the prototypical hillbilly. Melungeon are a mix of white(scotch/irish german) native american(cherokee/creek or others) and a dash of black.Hence the name"black dutch".
http://www.geocities.com/melungeonorigin/what.htm

And people assume I am white all the time.If you want to get a different perspective ,some people(government and some indians) don't think melungeons are Indian enough to join a tribe or have one. THe Lumbees are the attempt to find a cultural heritage in the mixed people of Appalachia.Yet it's weird I don't fit in with white culture,Native culture is a bit more comfy,but I feel awkward, and black culture is a bit more comfy,but I feel awkward there too. I feel best in MULTI cultures,mixed up,like me.

[Bucky]

73. You have an interesting an rich background. I'm glad to hear about it

But that doesn't make your words any less offensive or insulting. My view is that we ought to be able to enjoy and learn from each other's diversity without running somebody else down.

[ariesgem]

72. I'm a black woman, raised in Queens, NY

I grew up in a neighborhood called Springfield Gardens in the 1970's. The neigborhood back then was mostly working class black folks. One of the bordering neighborhoods to Springfield Gardens is Rosedale. Rosedale at that time was predominately working class Italian. We were not allowed in that neighborhood. If you were black and crossed that "border" into that neighborhood you would be chased out and/or beat down-no questions asked. Baseball bats were the weapons of choice.

I've lived in the South (Roswell, GA) and worked in Forsyte County (Klan country). I lasted there for 2 years. HATED IT. I've had too many experiences with racists in that backwards-ass town to list.

I currently live in the Los Angeles area in a ethnically diverse neighborhood. Although I still encounter racism here, it's not as frequent as it was when I lived in GA and NY.

[EFerrari]

79. Your post reminds me of the first time I went to visit my father

in St. Joseph, MO. He seemed upset that I had permed my hair and that is was very curly.

He wouldn't let me get out with him when he went into a bar-b-que place to pick up special food for a picnic.

I could barely contain my nausea until I was on a plane outta there.

And today, I have a closeted mayor with a PR team that finds him women to date to keep up his image. Yes, Gavin, YOU.

:puke:

Every form of bigotry is being fanned right now. The Republicans literally need it to exist.

Things are going to get worse, my feline friend, before they get better. I don't know what it is going to take to turn back this tide of hatred. But I know that MLK didn't give his life for me to let this pass. Not for a minute.

We need to buckle up, we need to be ready to refuse, refute and reject this horrible sh!t. Because, we will need to do it.

[stepnw1f]

81. Oh Yes it Does (nt)

[lgn19087]

84. What club was it?

I know of many country clubs that have strict "conservative" (not politically, but socially) admissions policies, but the "trophy wife" and the church business is news to me.

Full disclosure- I'm completely in favor of dress codes for places. The other stuff, well, that just sickens me.