Needed: Updates to the RR Dictionary

[TechBear_Seattle]

Many years ago, I found a few "definitions" from the Religious Right Dictionary. I played around with it and came up with a lot more definitions, then put it away and forgot about it.

I've recently found it again, and it looks a bit dated. Your suggestions as to new definitions or updated language of existing definitions would be much appreciated. As far as I know or care, this is public domain (even the parts I added/modified), so feel free to distribute.

Activist
Anyone you disagree with. Thus, "activist" judges, "activist" unions, "activist" school boards, and "activist" homosexuals.


Agenda
All political objectives you oppose. Democrats, liberals, feminists, gays, environmentalists have "agendas." Right-wing politicians have "hopes" and "dreams" and "Godly plans of action."

Atheism
See "Treason."


Boycott
God's preferred method of social change. If the targeted organization capitulates to a boycott, it is proof of "the power of God to change hearts." However, if a boycott is unsuccessful, it proves the organization being boycotted is "hardened" and "in the grip of the Devil."


Broken families
Refers only to divorce and applies to ALL divorces. Families are never "broken" or "shattered" by bad marriages, domestic violence, child abuse, incest or molestation.


Career
The greatest deception ever perpetrated upon women by "radical feminists" and one of the primary causes for The Breakdown Of The Family. Careers for women are "destructive" and "unfulfilling" compared to full-time child-rearing and home education. Women who attempt to balance family and career are seen as "shirking their God-given responsibility" and are responsible for creating another "generation without values."


Civil rights
The concept of equal legal rights; applies to everyone except gay and lesbian Americans for whom equal rights become "special" rights.


Compassion
No definition available.


Conservative
See "God".


Deception
Term describing the state of being a fellow Christian is in if they disagree with you on a social or theological issue. For example, if another Christian holds views that are pro-choice, pro-gay rights, or anti-death penalty, then they are "deceived." If the same Christian makes a logical, reasoned argument for their position, then they are "misled." If the same Christian also makes a Scriptural argument for their position, then they are "false teachers," "rebellious," and guilty of "twisting the Word." See
"Liberal."


Death Penalty
A form of punishment not used often enough. Most right-wing Christians long for the day when this is implemented against gays and lesbians. (See "Compassion.") The only time the death penalty is not considered "God's mighty judgment" is when a death row inmate has become a born-again Christian. Then, the death penalty is "unnecessary" and seen as an "impediment to further ministry" by the inmate slated for execution.

Democrat
See "Atheist", "Feminist", "Liberal" and "Homosexual." No other definitions available.


Disney
The main force behind The Collapse of Traditional Moral Values, and one of society's greatest threats to The Family, second only to gays and lesbians. Responsible for creating and popularizing the idea of domestic partner benefits.


Domestic partner benefits
Given by most progressive businesses and large corporations years before Disney offered them. Seen as a sign of "collapsing moral values" and as one of the largest threats to The Family. Main impetus for implementing The Boycott, but only against certain companies. See "Disney."


The Family
Unit of: heterosexual male head of household married for life to heterosexual female homemaker, with biological home schooled children conceived without birth control at least nine months after marriage in conservative Bible-believing church. No exceptions.


Feminist
Term (derogatory) for women not sufficiently submissive. Responsible for: neglected children, teenage pregnancy, unemployed males, poor SAT scores, breakdown of The Family.


Gay/Lesbian
Homosexual is the preferred term, as it focuses more explicitly on sex. With feminists and liberals, responsible for nearly all social ills (with the possible exception of abortion).


Gay Christians
Not possible. Those that claim to exist are "trapped" in a state of Deception, and are first in line for the Lake of Fire because they "twist God's Word." To save them, right-wing Christians must exercise "compassion" and tell them that God wants to kill them.


God
See "Republican".


Hate Crimes
Do not exist. Just another lie from "militant radical homosexual activists."


Heterosexuals
Never used. Assumed to be everyone on earth, except for tiny number of "militant radical homosexual activists".


Hollywood
The source of all evil in Western Civilization. Controlled either by Disney, feminists, liberals, and "militant radical homosexual activists" or Time/Warner when a new rap album is released. Also known as "Mystery Babylon" and "the pit of Hell."


Homosexuals
Tiny minority of "militant radical activists" seeking special rights, hiring quotas and the destruction of The Family. Recent phenomena signaling The End Is Near.


Judicial system
Varying definitions. When ruling against you, the courts are a sneaky way of subverting the "will of the people". Otherwise, a perfectly acceptable way of enforcing God's Will.


Liberal
An individual, organization, or institution which is deceived. See "Deception".


Materialism
Does not exist; therefore, not an issue. Massive personal wealth among leaders of organizations you support is further evidence of "God's favor."


Media
No such thing. Always "liberal, secular, biased media". Responsible for teenage pregnancy, illiteracy, sexual addictions, earthquakes, and the breakdown of The Family.


Militant
Never applied to political positions you agree with. Militant pro-lifers, militant pro-family-ists, and militant Christians are a contradiction in terms.


Persecution
Suffered if your position on an issue is actively opposed. Examples of "persecution" include investigative journalistic reporting, any lawsuit filed against a church organization by the ACLU, or being yelled at by people you have harassed by fax or phone or misrepresented in your fund-raising materials.


Physician
Any doctor, except those who perform abortions. Physicians who perform abortions are "abortionists". See "baby-killer".


Radical
Applied to anyone who disagrees with you. Thus, "radical" homosexuals, "radical" feminists, "radical" environmentalists. Right-wing Christians are not radical, they are "committed" and "focused".


Republican
See "Conservative".


Social engineering (syn. social experimentation) Term for the "activist agendas" of political opponents. Opposite is the
"natural God-given plan" as defined only by right-wing Christians.


Special rights
Applied only to gay and lesbian Americans. Refers to marriage, adoption and other rights automatically granted to heterosexuals.


Supreme Court
"Activist" when ruling against you. But "evidence of the mighty hand of God" when ruling in your favor or when Clarence Thomas is admitted to the bench.


Supreme Court appointments
Varying definitions. A presidential right, if president is Republican. Called "stacking the court" if president is Democrat.


Ten Percent
A lie about the percentage of the population that is gay or lesbian popularized by "militant radical homosexual activists", when in fact Right-wing Christian organizations have "proven" the figure is closer to one percent. How one percent of the population is responsible for The Destruction Of The Family is never clearly explained. See "Avoiding Difficult Questions."


Will of the people
Used only when the public votes your way. Acceptable method of denying constitutional rights of minorities. Never used when public opinion is against you (i.e. abortion, doctor-assisted suicide, etc.).


Women
See "wives", "mothers", or "homemakers". No other definition available.

[OnyxCollie]

1. Those are great.

They are still relevant today.