= Bush Gropes, Planet Cringes = Mark Morford

[madokie]

============= MARK MORFORD'S NOTES & ERRATA =============
SFGate.com - Wednesday, July 19, 2006

== Bush Gropes, Planet Cringes =
Knead a German chancellor, banter dumbly, reveal global ignorance. It's Dubya abroad!
(By Mark Morford)
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/gate/archive/2006/07/19/notes071906.DTL&nl=fix

So now we know.

I mean, we sort of thought we knew, before, what kind of guy George W. Bush is, essentially our very own inept, inarticulate ex-alcoholic ex-frat-guy failed-businessman pseudo-leader who famously appeals to the most God-fearin' and least educated and least attuned among us because he is, well, one of them.

We thought we had him pegged: Just a casual and aw-shucks sort of walkin', talkin', war-happy embarrassment to the country who was rumored to be a Genuinely Nice Guy in person but who, when he traveled abroad, nevertheless caused the entire nation to pre-emptively cringe in preparation for all sorts of imminent humiliations and lots of hilarious-yet-excruciating new material for "The Collected Bushisms."

But every so often we get a glimpse of just a little more. Or, rather, less. Of what lies just beneath that carefully controlled sheen of White House spin, what happens when Dubya is away from his handlers and his prefab scripts. We get a hint of just what fuels that clueless amble, that Chosen One bumble, that graceless and decidedly dorky sort of approach to everything from ordering a Diet Coke to comprehending Middle East chaos. ...

[GCP]

1. I'm just about ready to join the Rapture Ready

It just can't get much worse than this :(

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

2. Morford, as usual, nails it.

Bush is Michael Scott, the smarmy boss from "The Office." The clueless putz who thinks he's cool and everybody likes him. Only they don't.

[Vidar]

3. Good article. Thanks for posting.

[TalkingDog]

4. Sing it Loud, BrotherMan, Sing IT LOUD!!!

And then there's the 23% that STILL think it's okay for somebody like this to be running an entire country.

I wouldn't trust him to run my lawnmower.



My favorite Future Famous Dead Artist: KarenParker

[lectrobyte]

6. That's a good point. I always hear this "have a beer with" and "man's man"

bullshit about *, and I never ever bought that. You shouldn't vote for somebody that you wouldn't want to babysit your children or, in dubya's case, lowering the bar accordingly, even let borrow your car. And what kind of "man's man" just walks away from flying jet fighters?

[AlCzervik]

5. i blame his parents, his uninvolved father and his overbearing

mother. The episode highlights the fact that * doesn't know what appropriate is among many other things he doesn't know or care to know.

[leftchick]

7. this is exactly why his behaviour horrifies me......

<snip>

In other words, he is indeed That Guy, like the best man at the wedding party, the one standing out in the center of the room, casually and cluelessly telling off-color jokes that offend everyone but which he thinks are gul-dang hilarious and, hell, if you're offended then you're just some gul-dang hippie liberal. Haw.

He is That Guy. The one who thinks he is everybody's bestest pal, the guy everyone wants to kick back with and have a few brewskies and chat about baseball and lawn fertilizer and Jesus. After all, isn't that what we all desire of the man who decides some of the most difficult, deadly, complicated issues on the planet? Isn't that slacked, frat-guy goofiness exactly what you want trying to broker peace in the Middle East and understand global warming and stem-cell research? Sure it is.


:cry:

[Marie26]

8. Bush is Michael Scott.

I just realized it.

[seabeyond]

9. we need someone with bush charisma, not a kerry or gore

i get so friggin tired of hearing htis shit. since election and before, i have no desire to "have a beer" with president, nor will i ever have the opportunity. i am not hiring soemone to be friends. not to mention not a chance in hell i would be having one with bush. i am sure a mean drunk. but i want a boring, no excitemet, work hard, SMART person as president.

when i made a comment about smacking mouth while eating and not chewing with mouth close on a republican mixed board, i was told he was a regular joe. the fact, ... i would never diss regular joe like that. the ones i know, myself and family included have all learned table manners.

[ProfessorGAC]

10. You Said An Important Thing Here

You said "i am not hiring soemone to ...". I can never quite grasp why people don't realize the president WORKS FOR US, not the other way around.

There are so many feebleminded cowards who need "daddy" to protect them and will simply follow "the leader". You said a mouthfull when you mentioned "hiring" the president.
The Professor

[seabeyond]

16. right on

i have always seen it as hiring. when arguing with republican business running father i told him, if bush presented his resume you owuldnt even have an interview, let alone hire the dude. how can you vote for him. then 2004, i told him, you have an employee like this, you would fire his ass for laziness and ineptness....

that is how i see it

i dont need a dad. my dad has allowed me to figure out my life. a hell of a lot better dad than bush ever was to his daughters, a drunk until fourty.

[madokie]

18. Thats the way it's supposed to work but with this shit stain for a

pResident he works against us

[Lisa]

21. beautifully put!

You summed it up right there, seabeyond. If I'm going to be hiring someone to represent me (let alone paying $400k/year plus expenses), I do not want a clueless lout who will slack off and create derision or animosity with his antics. As you say, I don't want to "hire a friend" -- I already know people I can hang out with, who are way more entertaining and far less irritating than Bush, who seems to think he is a comedian or movie star!

A boring, non-charismatic person who takes the job seriously is fine by me.

[Lisa]

22. "that guy" -- yep, the one whom all the women in the office know to avoid

And not because we schedule briefing sessions on "the menace who thinks he's God's gift to girls" for the edification of all new female hires. The guy walks into a room ... and we just know what kind of person he is. Even before he starts with the "jokes", every woman within range of his voice instantly cringes.

Call it female intuition (heh!).

[Hubert Flottz]

11. Who would Jesus Grope?

Gawd told W to grab that lady, there's no doubt in my mind!

[DanCa]

12. I really can't picture President Cruel as a sexual being.

I want to go back in therapy now for having thunk that thought.

[Lisa]

23. thank you for that thought!

I'm going to be off my food for the rest of the summer!

[malaise]

13. Great article n/t

[sinkingfeeling]

14. He's just that arrogant, wealthy, coked-up, frat boy...a child in an

adult body. And he's sickening!

[DesertRat]

15. Perfectly stated. k&r

[SiouxJ]

17. I wonder how our troops would feel

if they could see Bush clowning around like he's at a frat party, while they risk their lives for his war.

[Jim Warren]

19. The worst president ever

and besides that, a reprehensible human being, the kind of person when I find myself near I get up and find another seat.

Look at the last still in the photo series, spoiled brat who is chronically used to the hired help taking his shit.

[icymist]

20. K & R, Everyone should read this one!

With conservations like this one
<snip>
Bush: "You eight hours? Me too. Russia's a big country and you're a big country. Takes him eight hours to fly home ... Russia's big and so is China. Yo Blair, what're you doing? Are you leaving?"
the rest of the world's leaders must know that this guy's an idiot and probably wonder what in the Hell is the matter with the American people for voting for him! Bush is a NATIONAL EMBARRASSMENT!

[Pachamama]

24. Excellent summary that nails exactly who "Bush" is....

"That Guy"....:puke:

The whole world is cringing when they see that smirky-jerk.