Heavily Sedated Lieberman Mumbles His Way Through Debate (BS News)

[bsartist]

HARTFORD, CT – Spurned by his party and seemingly whacked out of his head on painkillers, Sen. Joseph Lieberman mumbled something or other during a primary debate on Thursday night.

In a mostly unintelligible 30-minute rant, Lieberman probably reiterated his strong support for the war in Iraq while simultaneously taking time to attack his opponent for being weak on defense.

“Led Mlamon azoon freensh candy bet,” slowly murmured Lieberman in his trademark drawl, likely calling* his opponent Ned Lamont a fringe candidate with little understanding of the geopolitical landscape in Iraq. “A rack ess mush floobortant toh lev enna hanz uffa deck-vase liga Led Mlamon.”

Lamont returned fire, criticizing the incumbent for ignoring reports of rising instability in Iraq, accused him of tongue-kissing President Bush, and declared at one point that it was "patently obvious that Mr. Lieberman was high on drugs of some sort, probably the weed.”

Although no can say for sure exactly what Lieberman said in his incoherent mumblings, according to his aides he almost certainly defended the conflict as "a lot better, different" than a year ago.

"Spay zon tha flay toh bell-ding a flee end flindo plendant schmee lack,” a drugged-out Lieberman slowly and lazily drawled, souding like someone who'd just woken up from having had all four of their wisdom teeth pulled. “Zakeshtonez, arvee mooging poo oobanden phlegm en spare shower uff neet?”

Read the rest at http://www.bsnews.org/articles/139

SATIRE - He doesn't actually ever mumble or get high on prescription drugs.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

1. that was funny!

Sad, though, that some people would think BS news was a bona fide news organization.

[MazeRat7]

2. I'm not so sure this is satire... also, I worry I actually understood him.

I say that because he sounds like our drummer after the last set @ 2am......

MZr7

[cliss]

3. OMG....that's great!

Even if it is satire, look at Holy Joe's face....He DOES look sedated...WOW.

The dude's finished.

[bsartist]

4. Thanks!

Definitely not the best concept I ever came up with, but seriously, somebody's gotta call him on this. It's like, our media keeps playing 'spot the anorexic,' or 'spot the Botoxed forehead,' and it just feel like we never play 'spot the guy hopped up on Valium' just because all the reporters are too.