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Two cops sitting at the counter of a local dunkin donuts.
Cop#1: So I says to da guy, put down the cat and we can tawk...
Cop#2: day never loin. He get a load of da guy dat just walked in...
A swarthy completion man, in his 20's, dressed in a long overcoat, enters the eatery carrying a paper bag. He hoisted th bag over his head and yells...
Man: I have a bag full of cream filled donuts and I'm not afraid to use them!!! Cop#1: holy crap!
The two cops duck behind there metal diner stools.
Cop#2: Jeez, Ralph, this guy looks serious, should we call for back up?
Ralph: naaa, I've seen this before, I can handle him.
Slowly Ralph gets up and puts his hands out in front of him, showing the donut terrorist he's a "friend".
Ralph: Hey, you don't want to do dis. Look buddy, we are all fellow humans in here just catching a break from the world.
man: don't come a step closer. these things are loaded and ready to go!
Ralph: I know times are tough, we all need a little help, someone to talk to now and then.
Man: it's been tough man.
Ralph nods to the frighten donut worker behind the counter. In response the counter worker nods back and slowly ducks under the counter. Ralph takes a step closer.
Ralph: I'm ralph, and you are...
The man looks around at the faces in the shop.
Man: I'm Steve.
Ralph: nice to meet ya steve, now I think you really don't want to use those things to go off, do you? You seem like a good guy.
Steve: no, I mean, yes, maybe, I don't know! I was told, you know, to do it for the cause!!
Out of the corner of Ralph's eye, the counter person places to regular cups of coffee on the counter.
Ralph: Steve, smell dat? freshly brewed...
Steve: oh man!
Steve, absent mindedly, lets go of the bag to reach for the coffee. Ralph panics and dives for the bag, catching it within millimeters of the floor. The other patrons erupt in applause. Cop#2 rushes to his partners side.
Cop#2: Ralph, dat was close, you okay?
Ralph: Damn close, now get me a regular coffee now! These things are about to go sour!
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