The invisibility of female labor

[Ellen Forradalom]

on display here at DU:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=389&topic_id=1845146&mesg_id=1849250

Women should just step up to the plate and do their duty so this poster can pay a few bucks less in taxes.

Compare with: http://72.14.253.104/search?q=cache:r0IQ3A2I20cJ:pandagon.blogsome.com/2007/05/09/quality-of-whose-life-again/+word+processor+with+breasts+female+labor&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us&client=firefox-a

"he “good death,” in being cast as The Way Things Used To Be (though not by McKown, explicitly) is based on the assumption of unpaid female labor. Of course, there’s nothing intrinsic in dying at home that requires the presence of estrogen: men can turn over bedridden elders and clean out bed pans and advocate for the patient just as well as women can. But get real. What we’re talking about here is women — wives, sisters, daughters, mothers — taking care of the dying person for free, though perhaps with some paid expert help if they’re lucky, a nurse practitioner or attendant paid to come by for a couple hours a day."

[WildClarySage]

1. What I picked up from that thread is how much people are ready

to blame parents for their children's behavior. Often children who act out have parents that are to blame, often children act out for reasons that have nothing to do with their parents. I had to stop at the grocery the other night after going to the gym. They have a child care room so I had taken WCSjr with me. By the time we left, he was tired, but we were out of milk and I was already out, so no choice but to stop. Naturally, he had a meltdown at Kroger. A wonderful, normally happy kid having a bad moment. But boy Those Who Judge Parents were in high gear that night. Had I just been a better, more insightful, disciplining, paddling/not paddling, perfect mom, my child would always behave perfectly.

I've noticed a rash of Criticize Parents threads here lately. As if parenting isn't difficult enough, those of us who can't be 24/7 Perfect are constantly being JUDGED by people who, oddly enough, claim to have children of their own. And when people judge parents, who do they judge? The mom. Not the dad. The mom. If the perception of a primary caregiver was a male, I bet dollars to donuts that the criticism would slow to a crawl.

[bliss_eternal]

2. I'm sorry...

...that you've felt on the recieving end of GD crap, as a parent.
On a good day they are insensitive. On a bad day nothing short of cruel.
:hug: Please, don't let it get you down.

I must have missed some of the "parenting" topics/threads. I only caught the "parenting notes" made in the breastfeeding threads. :eyes:

Just as you said, it was all about horrible, reckless women--such hussies! That dare to expose themselves for cheap thrills, when they should be bowing and scraping their way to the nearest dark corner. Only there should they reveal their horribly disfigured, milk engorged breasts--so as not to offend anyone. :sarcasm:

I was especially surprised to see so many women jumping into the fray to crucify other mothers. Wasn't it helpful of them to provide their personal manuals on "How to breastfeed modestly, so as not to remind the assholes of the world what breasts are REALLY for." ;)
Nice. :eyes:

[Ellen Forradalom]

3. Don't be surprised

The patriarchy's most brutal enforcers are women. How dare one of us step out of line?

[WildClarySage]

4. The one that really struck me was in Health

all about how evil parents are making their young children (not babies)ride in strollers. What are we doing to them? How dare we give them a ride when there's exercise to be had! Oh won't somebody think of the children???

There have also been a couple of Rotten Kids on an Airplane threads, too. It seems like everybody knows how to parent other people's kids best... except those kid's own parents. :eyes:

[bliss_eternal]

6. It never ceases to amaze me...

...how many are so willing to offer their unsolicited expertise on so many topics that they have absolutely no clue about.
How so many others seem to believe that their presence in the same room as another, gives them so much knowledge on so little. :eyes:

This is probably one of the reasons I so rarely stick my head into GD, other than the rare occasions I see a group being pummeled by the ignorance apologists. I long ago grew tired of being told I had no right to my feelings, by those that with no inherent understanding of what it is to be me.

[atommom]

7. It's true. There's nothing that sets off a GD feeding frenzy faster

than a thread about women, children, or dog forbid, women AND children. It's kind of ironic when you consider that the "women and children" category is in the majority! The judging doesn't really surprise me anymore, but it is terribly disheartening. People are so eager to cast judgment and offer ridiculously bad advice too.

[raccoon]

5. Tried to recommend this post, but DU wouldn't let me.

That's so absolutely true.

""he “good death,” in being cast as The Way Things Used To Be (though not by McKown, explicitly) is based on the assumption of unpaid female labor. Of course, there’s nothing intrinsic in dying at home that requires the presence of estrogen: men can turn over bedridden elders and clean out bed pans and advocate for the patient just as well as women can. But get real. What we’re talking about here is women — wives, sisters, daughters, mothers — taking care of the dying person for free, though perhaps with some paid expert help if they’re lucky, a nurse practitioner or attendant paid to come by for a couple hours a day."