Atheists, any past religious moments to confess.

[FM Arouet666]

I must admit, I am surprised by the number of respondents in A&A which profess to be former christians. I am curious, what are your religious experiences?

I have been to church twice. Once, age 12 or 13, my dad dragged me out early Easter for a sunrise service, I was so pissed off he never tried it again. The second time was in Marine Corps boot camp. The drill instructor informed us that "you can go to church, or stay in the barracks, and we will find something for you to do." I was so bored out of my head, I elected to stay in the barracks every Sunday thereafter. Turns out it was just an empty threat, did a lot of laundry and letter writing.

No Sunday school, no bible reading, no confession, no prayer, no baptism, no priests pastors deacons or preachers. Damn, I feel blessed. :evilgrin:

[Jokerman]

1. I went to church, once.

A girl I was dating in high school made a deal with me. She would let me take her to an XXX rated drive-in on the condition that I would go to church with her. She had a lot of guilt over sex and I guess she thought that dragging me into church would help her "atone for her sins".

Needless to say, we had a lot more fun at the movie than we did at church.

[BiggJawn]

2. I used to be one of "them".

Put my hand on the TV screen and let Billy Graham "lead me to Jeebus" when I was about 12 or so, read the Bible, worried about my "eternal salvation", listened to the preachers on AM radio on Sunday night, the whole schtick in sufficient quantites for a teen-aged boy. Thought I was gonna get hit by lightning the first time I had sex...

Then I got a job working in a Holy-Roller Teeee-Veeeee station. Let me tell you, Steve Martin's "Leap of Faith" was more a documentary than a comedy.
I noticed back then (mid 80's) that Gawd and his boy evidently were ReTHUGlicans. Then when Big Dawg was elected, well, you'd had thunk the Antichrist had just made his apperance.
Those events, along with all the hypocrisy and graft I saw going on around me (I was getting my utilities shut off, but the boss and all his boys were leasing new cars) really got me to thinking.

Then an event happened that really drove home the point that "Nothing FAILS like Prayer".

Then my marriage went to hell in a handbasket, one of the stepkids killed himself, and the "prayer counsellor" at work told me "Well! That's PROOF that Satan is operating in your family and life!"

So I ditched Christianity. Yeah, I know, the woo-woos are probably saying to themselves "But, those weren't REAL Chrisitians". Oh, spare me. They're real enough for everyday wear.

Did the Medicine Pipe/Tunkashila thing for a while, too. Figured out if "Grandfather" was so powerful, how come his people were living in such squalor up on the Rosebud and other places. Also found out about "Plastic Medicine Men", too. Just more hucksters peddling Religion for fun and PROFIT...

So I just quit. This is It. The ONLY life you'll EVER have is the one you're living right now, and it's way the fuck too short to spend worrying about Mystical Sky Daddies and spooks and wee Beasties and things that go "Boomp!" in the night.

[FM Arouet666]

19. "Real Christians"

That is a tired old line used by apologists. I see it posted in DU all the time.

In reality, "real" christians tend to be self-centered, judgmental, and intolerant. Perhaps what apologists should say is "ideal" christians, of course this is relative. My idea of an "ideal" christian is an atheist with a crucifix fetish.

:evilgrin:

[Goblinmonger]

3. I was raised strict Catholic

I even graduated from a high school seminary. I can tell you a lot about the number of gays in the priesthood--all positive from my perspective.

Ironically, it was in the seminary that the seeds of my coming atheism were planted.

[onager]

4. I hate this memory...

And my more devout relatives always bring it up...usually when we're arguing about evolution or abortion or George W. Jesus Bu$h.

When I was 4 years old, my grandfather died after a long illness. I had a very strong bond with my grandfather, and all these years later I can still remember sitting by his bed and talking to him. (This was the rural South in the 1950's. Poor people died at home, not in a hospital.)

According to the relatives, one night my grandfather asked me to get him a glass of water. I replied: "I will in a minute. Right now I'm praying for you."

I hope time travel becomes a reality soon. I want to go back in time and kick my own 4-yr-old ass.

[GOPFighter]

5. Nah...lighten up on the kid

What that 4 year was really saying was, "I love you Gramps and I'd do anything to keep you here, even pray for you." I hope someday I have a grandkid who loves me that much (and is smart enough to grow up sans religion)

[onager]

7. Thanks so much, GOP-F!

I never thought of it that way before...as dumb as that sounds.

Sometimes I think of that incident as a metaphor for religion: there are people who believe prayer should come before anything, even basic human needs. I guess I was one then, but at least I can plead extreme youth and ignorance.

Anyway, your response made me feel better and I appreciate it.

Back to Heartless Atheist Grump Mode...

[muriel_volestrangler]

6. With most Americans still religious, it's not surprising that many grew up

in a religious family, and followed, for a time, that religion (if you're as conformist as I am, anyway). I'm a bit surprised that your Dad waited until you were 12 or 13 to force you to church (and did it at sunrise - I'd have thought that would obviously turn a kid against it. Much more cunning to offer the chance to stay up late when you're 9 if you go to a midnight service).

My mother is religious, so I went to church a bit (and her father was a vicar, so it's not all that surprising that she is). While going through the preparation for confirmation at age 14 or so (which, looking back, I think I wanted to do partly as a rite of passage, partly to please her), I started thinking seriously about religion, and gave it up shortly after being confirmed.

[Az]

8. No religious moments, but

I do go to a UU Church. I even suspect our new minister is an atheist (still working on getting it out of her).

Of course UU churchs are nothing like the mainstream churchs. Most try to deny that we are even a religion. No dogma, no required belief in god or the supernatural. It sometimes seems the only reason we come together is for the coffee(and I don't even drink that).

I was raised religion zero. Both parents were soft atheists. They never really gave it much thought and decided to simply lay low and not discuss such matters in our god soaked society.

They do have a story of when we were on vacation in Boston and I was a toddler they tried to take me into some of the historic churchs for tours. Ever seen the movie The Omen? I pulled a Damien. Screamed my head off. They could not get me in any of the churchs. Apparently even then.... I knew.

[FM Arouet666]

16. Better check your scalp for the three little sixes ;)

What is UU, Unitarian?

[Az]

20. Yep

Unitarian Universalist.

[progressoid]

9. Raised Presbyterian - started to stray from the flock at 9 or 10 yrs old

I used to have horrific nightmares, so I remember making a deal with god to help me through the night. It worked for a while - but when I started to notice that god was breaking the deal, I called off the deal. That was the beginning of the end. Eventually, I stopped accepting what they told me in church. In time, the nightmares ended too.

Some time later, I remember lying in bed and declaring, "there is no god". Then immediately going into a panic about losing my soul to Linda Blair or something. However, the next morning I got up and went to school. No problem.

I continued to attend church to appease my parents. While everyone praised gawd, I was dissecting their beliefs. The more I learned, the less I believed.

College brought an interest in other religions, mostly academically, not spiritually. For years I would go through phases of looking for some sort of spiritual answer. It wasn't until recovering from a bout of severe depression a few years ago that I was able to completely divorce myself from that search for an "answer".

Now the struggle is trying to keep my eyes from rolling out of my head when religion comes up. I suspect that all of this pent up frustration with my family will explode at some time in the near future. That should be fun.

Thanks for topic - it's nice to vent.

[GOPFighter]

10. I was raised in the church

Literally.

On Sunday:
Sunday School, church service, youth group, and sunday evening services
Tuesday:
Youth visitation
Wednesday:
Prayer Meeting

Every summer:
- a week of vacation bible school
- two week revival where we had to go to church EVERY evening for two weeks.

I had to go to every service every frickin' week.

I had plenty of time to realize how scared and insecure (and hypocritical) most of the church members were. Get this: a deacon in the church forbid his four kids to watch TV. Refused to have a TV in their house. Then one night one of the kids had a nightmare and rushed into her parents bedroom...and they were watching TV. The TV was hidden in the closet and they would open the door at night and watch!!!

This was the Bible Belt...small town...gossipy...very few residents had ever attended college...few graduates from my HS went to college...kids were expected to learn facts at school, but discouraged from thinking...in fact few adults had the ability or courage to think for themselves. Fortunately I went into the service, saw a wider world, met people who taught me how to think critically, went to college, and moved to a large metropolitan area where my kids were born and raised. I would never, ever, ever raise my kids in a small town after what I went through.

[phantom power]

11. I was raised Lutheran.

Pretty much the works, I guess. Sunday school, lutheran summer camp, confirmation. It wasn't so bad, either. I had a lot of good times, and had a lot of good friends from all that. Some days, I miss that part of it. Church is powerfully effective social network.

Been a long time since I went to church for anything except various people's weddings.

My wife and I were married by a minister. I felt peculiar about that, but he came recommended, and it was one of those "family politics" decisions. We made it clear that we weren't church-goin folk, and interestingly, he never batted an eye. In the end, we had a nice ceremony with him, and had some fun with him at the reception too. Good guy.

[trotsky]

12. Was fairly religious until 17-18.

Grew up & was confirmed in the ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America). I wasn't a fundie, but I tried not to swear, promised myself to remain a virgin til I got married (missed out on a few opportunities because of that, dammit), and prayed as a way of thinking about my problems and responsibilities.

The more I prayed, the more it felt like I was just talking to myself. And the more I read the bible, the less inspired I thought it was. Then I got to college and the world opened up for me, and soon thereafter (~21) I realized I was an atheist.

I feel bummed in a way that I wasted so much mental energy and turned down some life experiences because of my religious beliefs at the time. What's worse is that because I never really "felt" anything even when I *was* religious, I don't even feel like I gained any insight into the religious mind. I was just fooling myself, and didn't know that there was another way.

[Tafiti]

37. Damn.

Replace ELCA with AG, and you pretty much summed up my life path, too! :thumbsup:

Or, more accurately... :thumbsdown: :D

[toddaa]

13. Oh we used to dream of going to church every night for only two weeks

First six years of my life, I went to "meeting" (church was for heathen unbelievers) every night, twice on Saturday, and all day on Sunday. The group my family came out of is called the Exclusive Brethren, which is an extreme offshoot of the Plymouth Brethren. To be a member of the Exclusive Brethren, you have to be born into it and then you have to toe the line your entire life our you will be shut out permanently. Families across America, Europe, and Australia have been destroyed by this nasty little cult. If your curious about these folks, they gave the world J.N. Darby, the Rapture, and other assorted end times chicanery. Probably the most influential religious group you never heard of.

My family left in '71 after a major leadership shake up, involving lots of alcohol and lots of sex. We slowly migrated through the more liberal Open Brethren groups (relatively speaking, of course) until we hit your basic run of the mill "nondenominational" fundy churches. Up until I was 18, I was a good little boy and then all hell broke lose. I made up for missing out on my teen age rebellion years in my 20s with various involvement in occult activity ala Aleister Crowley. Not proud of either phase of my life but I don't own a bible and still have a stash of Uncle Al's books sitting on a bookshelf in the basement. They sit right next to my Subgenius and Principia Discordia books.

[FM Arouet666]

18. Damn scary stuff, good thing you got away....

I confess, I have never heard of the Exclusive Brethren. A few links for those who are interested. Just astonishing how crazy humans can be. Did your entire family get out?


http://www.rickross.com/groups/exclusive_brethren.html
http://www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/christianity/subdivisions/brethren/

[toddaa]

25. Most did

After the age of 7, I never saw my maternal grandparents again, along with quite a few uncles, aunts, and cousins. Most in my family gravitated towards Open Brethren groups, which is the more liberal branch of the Plymouth Brethren. Of course, liberal only in relation to the Exclusive Brethren. They are still very fundamentalist and believe a lot of the same Darby dispensational crap that the Exclusive Brethren believe.

What's strange is watching the rise of the fundamentalist movement in this country as I was growing up. A lot of the end times teachings of J.N. Darby have been accepted by fundamentalists, despite the fact that Biblical scholars find little support for them in the Bible. The teleevangelist John Hagee scares the shit out of me, because he preaches a lot of the stuff I was taught growing up. The charts and graphics he uses come right out of Darby's books. End timers and premillenialists are some seriously fucked up people. I know a lot of people here are afraid of the dominists and the reconstructionists, but they don't scare me as much as the premillienal dispensationalists simply because of my upbringing.

[muriel_volestrangler]

35. My grandmother grew up in the Open Brethren

but had the good sense to get out when she left home. My great aunt and one of her children stayed in it, and, by coincidence or not, were/are the only racists in my family.

[onager]

22. Toddaa, thanks!

I had never heard of the Exclusive Brethren either. Though I have read some of J.N. Darby's rantings.

[Book Lover]

14. I was raised strict Catholic

You know, where you raise the youngest girl in the family to be "innocent", so that when she goes to college she has no interpersonal experience with the opposite sex to draw on? That kind.

[onager]

23. Hey BL! Ever hear of this?

I used to work with a really nice woman who had been raised Catholic and was the youngest daughter. She was also Hispanic, so part of this may be from the Hispanic more than the Catholic culture. Or maybe it was just her family culture.

Anyone else familiar with this can chime in, too. The whole thing sort of baffled me.

Anyway, this woman used to say that she would never marry because the youngest daughter was supposed to stay single and help the parents when they got old.

She came from a large family and had tons of nieces and nephews, who she spoiled outrageously. Whenever one of the brothers or sisters wanted to take the family to Disneyland or something, she would sometimes pick up the whole tab, whether she went or not.

She was also in her forties and still a virgin. She didn't hand out cards saying that or anything, but when she started talking about her personal life, it came out.

It certainly wasn't for lack of interest. She was quite beautiful and very smart.

When I told her I was an atheist, she just said something like: "Well, I don't personally understand how somebody can not believe in God. But that's your business." (I told you she was smart...)

Oh, and she went to church a lot. I mean, a LOT.

[Book Lover]

27. I think it's a RC/Latinate cultural thing

In my experience and opinion, those cultures derived from the patriarchal Roman family structure tend to grow families this way; my people are from Italy and the Slav countries. Yes, I was somewhat expected to grow into that role. The older sister is the one that leaves the home and perpetuates the female family line; the younger sister stays at home and takes care of the parents.

When they pass on, however, her reward is that she gets the majority of the fruits of the parent's wealth; the house, the car, the money; whatever it is, she is seen as entitled to it because she sacrificed. The older siblings, since they are married and out of the house, do not expect to get as much as she. It would be a cold family that left the youngest sister with as much or less than her siblings.

Just one example from my own life: My own parents told me, when I called them to let them know I was pregnant, that they had been talking just a few days before about how they had no grandchildren. When I pointed out that my brothers had had kids, they said that was different, and that they wouldn't really have grandchildren until one of their daughters had kids.

[onager]

30. Thanks!

OK, now I understand better. Thank you for taking the time to answer.

I'm not sure I understand the part about only a daughter having REAL grand-kids. They're not real until an XX family member has them?
Interesting!

I hope it doesn't sound like I'm snarking. Believe me, my own family has some ideas that go Totally Off The Weirdness Scale, too...:crazy:

To paraphrase a famous person, I guess all families are crazy in their own way.

[geniph]

31. That's mostly a Hispanic thing, I think

having the family line pass matrilineally. I think traditional Spanish names, for example, were matrilineal + the patrilineal line, thus the Ybarra y Gomez type naming.

Personally, I always thought matrilineal descent makes more sense anyway - you KNOW who the mother was. You have to do fancy-pants testing to find out who the father was.

[Book Lover]

34. It *is* odd to be matriarchal in this one way

The way my direct and blunt mother explained it was that because boys grow up and leave the house and girls do not, any kids the girl has "belong" to the family, but any kids the boys have "belong" to his wife's family.

No snarkiness detected here *grin* Now if we were in the lounge... ;-)

[Taxloss]

15. I was raised agnostic. I converted to Christianity in my mid to late teens

I was a Christian through my university years, and a devout one. My faith disintegrated in my early twenties. Its heyday lasted less than five years.

[Doubting Thomas]

17. I was raised Catholic

My mother was strict, my father a "fallen seminarian" He got kicked out when he tried to do his thesis on why the church signed that treaty with Mussolini. (or was it the one with Hitler?)

I sort of believed as a kid, but my father taught me to question things when I went to a parochial high school. Once you start to question, it's all over.

I dropped Catholicism before I was done with high school. The "Doubting Thomas" nickname was given to me by one of the brothers (monks for those of you with no Catholic experience).
I left high school an agnostic. The last time I seriously prayed was for thanks that HawkerHurricane was born healthy.

Atheism just came gradually, realized it around 20 years ago.

[geniph]

32. Hey! Are you HawkerHurricane's parental unit?

Well, :hi:! Any friend of HH's is a friend of mine!

[Doubting Thomas]

33. Yeah,

and that was about 42 years ago. (I think we're still friends.) ;)

Good to meet you.

[WhollyHeretic]

21. I went to church once and synagogue once as a kid.

My parents had a lot of problems caused by religion and while they both believe in god they both grew to strongly dislike any organized religion. Thankfully I was spared the indoctrination. One of my atheist friends was an alter boy though.

[NMMNG]

24. Moments? Try years!

I was essentially religion free until my mom decided we (she, my sisters, and I) needed to start going to church. This was when I was 8. We started attending the local Southern Baptist Church, and whether the SBC was different in those days or whether that particular church was different I don't know, but it wasn't the repressive nut-factory of today. Anyway, I ultimately ended up getting a full-immersion baptism, my grandparents gave me a gold-tooled, leather bound KJV Bible to commemorate the occasion and I was on my way.

Well, it turned out my mom's pattern was to be gung-ho about church for a few years then taper off for a while, so that's how I ended up being. As an adult when I became gung-ho again at one point, I decided it was time to see if SBC was right for me. I researched different faiths and determined United Methodism was a better fit so I went to the local church and joined. I was an active member there until I moved out of the state.

In my new state I tried the church near my new home but didn't like it much so I decided to just be "Christian but not religious". Essentially, for me, that meant I read the Bible and inspirational/related books intensively, but didn't attend church. I had an extensive library of such books and borrowed more from the public library regularly.

As you can see, I was pretty hardcore at times, though never a fundie :puke:. I've already told the story of "losing my religion", which happened about 11 years after my indoctrination. Thank goodness I finally woke up and saw the light. :think:

[onager]

26. Yay! Another SoB escapee!

:toast:

You make a good point about the image of the Southern Baptists, though. When I first left the South, people usually looked at me like I was about to break into the Unknown Tongues or start flinging snakes around when I mentioned growing up as an SoB.

Nothing of the sort. Our church services couldn't have been any duller. Sunday School at 9 AM on Sunday, and "preaching" at 10. Couple of hymns, a few prayers, a usually short sermon, and you were out of there.

One thing that happened to the SoB's: back around 1979 the Southern Baptist Convention got hijacked by Fundamentalists, who have controlled the organization ever since.

A high-school friend of mine is a Baptist preacher back in SC. He's really frustrated by that. According to him, Fundies control all the SBC boards, commissions, etc. And no one who disagrees with them gets into any position of influence.

That's sort of a shame, even though I'm of course not in the church any more. But for 300 years, Baptists staunchly supported the separation of church and state (with a collective memory of the times when John Calvin's theocracy was drowning Baptists in Lake Geneva).

The Fundies ruined that. Along with everything else they touch.

[MindPilot]

28. Very religious upbringing, Dad southern baptist, mom catholic

went to catholic school.

I was always very much a scientific and logical thinker so I Santa, god and the Easter bunny went away about the same time; around eight or ten.

My first big question came to me when I was about 8 or 9 in the basement of the Rosedale Baptist Church in Covington Ky and I discovered that the "blood of christ" was actually Hawaiian Punch. After that, it was all over but the shouting.

[mccoyn]

29. I don't quite want to admit it.

Lets see there was the campus christains thing. They thought I was gifted and God really spoke through me. This was with the same BS that got me As in English class. I helped build a church. Well, there was the one and the a few others for just a weekend.

It seems when I was very young we went to church a lot then we didn't. Also my grandparents moved out of state, but I don't remember if it was at the same time. I have a good guess. Then, in high school my grandparents moved back. No, they moved back into our small house. We started going to church again of course. I got confirmed Luthern, learned how to properly hate Catholics while still believing most of the crap they spew (I still don't understand the difference between pretending the wine is blood and pretending you believe the wine is blood.)

I had no real faith going into college so I joined this campus group. I gave god every chance I could. No luck. Time to give up.

I do enjoy seeing my extended family when I go home so I still go to church when I visit. No need to rock the boat. My grandfather has become a laborer for christ, meaning he builds churches for meager pay. I enjoy building and spending time with family so I have helped with that a little.

If there is a god, he has made me unable to have faith. There is my proof the christain god does not exist.

[Kolesar]

36. My buddy had a religious experience at a Talking Heads concert.

We drove a long way to another town where they were playing an open-air concert on their "Stop Making Sense" tour. At the end of "I Get Wild", he told me "I think I just had a religious experience". He was a very subdued and understated guy and I really believe he did and wasn't funning me.

There's something about music that gets to people. Why do you think they shake your bones with the big ol' pipe organ at the temple? Gotta get you psyched up for the "God Stuff". How about bagpipes at a funeral? Designed to make you cry. What a trick.

BTW, that Heads concert was super-excellent!