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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:09 PM
Original message
Any PTSD folks here?
Edited on Mon Dec-13-04 11:11 PM by Maddy McCall
What led to your ptsd?

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pearl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:15 PM
Response to Original message
1. Early Child Abuse
and I've had to deal with it some and keep attentive to it
since 9/11. Although, I live in Chicago. You?
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-14-04 12:28 AM
Response to Reply #1
9. Domestic violence survivor.
My ex-husband beat me, broke my ribs, cut me with a knife, spat in my face...and told me he would kill me one day. I still am very cautious when I go in public. I always feel like he is right behind me.

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NoSheep Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:16 PM
Response to Original message
2. Realizing my childhood experiences that I tried to be cool about had
actually led to my lack of achievement and resulting clinical depression. Having to stay silent to protect the rest of the family.
This is such a serious issue and having a friend who understands this experience is so important.
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Dez Donating Member (826 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:16 PM
Response to Original message
3. I had PTSD
due to being targeted by a sociopathic borderline personality disorder person 4 years ago. But I went to Brazil, and had a healing by a spiritual healer named John of God http://johnofgod.com ... I have not had PTSD since August, as a result of that.
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flamingyouth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:18 PM
Response to Original message
4. Molested as a child, raped when I was 18
Suicide of husband this past June.

I hate my life. I see a counselor, but the thought of living 40 or so more years depresses me.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-14-04 12:30 AM
Response to Reply #4
10. God, you've been through too much.
I am so sorry. :hug:
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LeighAnn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:22 PM
Response to Original message
5. Seems to be a regular thing
I seem to always be freaking out about things that happened in the past that, at the time, I thought I handled quite well. I'm usually the one that keeps their head when something horrible is going on, then at some point in the future it just seems to "hit me", and everybody else has already gotten over it and they don't see what I'm freaking out about.

Also, I think I might have PTSD about medical things that have happened to me. Is that possible?

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ElectroPrincess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:32 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. It depends upon the intenisty of your emotions (the medical
procedure) at the time. If you keep reflecting upon those experiences it may be a cause for concern.
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ElectroPrincess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:24 PM
Response to Original message
6. I'm happy for you that despite the odds, you have achieved academic
academic success. That's excellent! ;)

I don't feel comfortable bringing out the details of my personal experience, forgive me. I was kidnapped for 48 hours by an ex-boyfriend who stalked me.

It was a horrific experience. I made peace with myself although it is not something you ever forget.

Later I earned a BS and MS degrees in Physiological Psychology. Although I was able to conduct research with the Navy for a year, most of my experience has been clinical in the form of Addiction Counseling.

Those of us who've come close to a near death experience, regardless of the circumstances, I believe are often more adept at recognizing emotional trauma in others.

Yes, it takes training and honed clinical skills, but there's also a heightened sense of awareness in our ability to detect the varied underlying symptoms that are indicative of someone suffering from PTSD.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-14-04 12:32 AM
Response to Reply #6
11.  Wow! Congrats to you!
What I've been through is my motivation to never have to depend on anyone else again.

Have you ever worked with vets with PTSD? Talk about sad... :cry:
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nofurylike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-13-04 11:36 PM
Response to Original message
8. yes. no details, just sending support, understanding to you! and all! n/t
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nofurylike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-14-04 01:37 AM
Response to Reply #8
12. delete
Edited on Tue Dec-14-04 01:39 AM by nofurylike
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Banazir Donating Member (164 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-14-04 11:30 PM
Response to Original message
13. Yes
Yes, from institutionalization. I was somewhat this way before that, but the degree to which I was like this before that pales in comparison so much that I rarely think of the prior abuse (physical, sexual, emotional) as even relevant anymore.
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Spider Jerusalem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-15-04 11:32 AM
Response to Original message
14. Severe bullying in school.
PTSD seems to be fairly common among autistics and those with Asperger's Syndrome for this reason.

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undergroundpanther Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 02:55 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. I got it too
I had a fundee pedophile neighbor who was really psycho.But he abused my trust because at first he was nice to me,when it felt like the world wanted me dead, he and his son was my freind,until I found out the ugly truth he had very evil motives to his niceness. My psycho father,incest,Later as a teen, attempted rapes at school at halfway houses and residential housing .(I fought back those times).For years I carried a bootknife with me.I was bullied in school and hurt in psych institutions in the most sick of ways. It never ends.
Because apparently society itsself is too infested with bullies and too many people who have conduct disorders or reacting against them to stop the bully mind from destroying us all with thier lust for inducing traumas in innocent or vunerable people.


When will humanity say no more to the the'entitlement' of bullies to be the exploiters and abusers of the innocent,vunerable and trusting people,or people without this 'drive'(ambition) to dominate,exploit, steal or abuse others? When will the non conduct disordered folks get together and protect each other from assholes and force,expose or shame the abusive part of humanity to either stop abusing others,stop excusing thier abusing and rationalizing it,stop desensitizing the hurting through humiliation or mindgames? When will more people be able to decide to wake up,stand up,and stop playing master and servant with abusers or each other as if that is "normal"? This sick top/bottom dynamic happens to people on so many levels in human culture in personal life,at school work in politics. It really is the same damn sick dynamic you will see in abusive relationships that is now being exploited for dominating the white house and the church,,the hospital the economy, school and work....Abuse dynamics infiltrates everything in this culture with it's putridness. It seems alot of people can't see the rampant cocercion that is our cultural stench in the air we breathe evertyday until they step out of their own culture enough to realize what it is that stinks about the way we relate to one another. What does it take to knock the lenses out of a bad cultures rosy eyeglasses making abuse appear"normal"?

When is enough bullshit,really enough bullshit for humanity to give up on believing in what you have been taught that serves the interests of domination systems? Like it's good to behave as submissive in the face of degradation or exploiting.That it is wrong to say NO and back it up like you mean it...When will more people realize it does no good to decide to do more emotional or otherwise comprimises with bully assholes who do not care as long as they get thiers? Workers should realize the kind of boss who makes workers suffer economically(by being cheap,insanely demanding and greedy)who has workers in a constant stae of fear over being able to survive scrambling and selling thier labor cheap are ABUSING them to get labor cheap so they can get rich off of them faster..It is not business as usual,it is exploitation and abuse. It is time to call it what it is and stop pretending.

Boys do not need to be boys if that means they are excused for being bully boys.No one has a social entitlement to dominate,exploit or abuse another person for being different,not agreeing,being a 'productive person' not submitting to 'leaders',being a female,intellegent,creative,a child or fill in the blank___. And there is no reason to believe ANYONE is "entitlerd" to profit from the emotional traumas ,or "weakness" of others..

Cultural conditioning happens,and alot of people get conditioned by thier cultures to believe plenty of shit that does them harm.It sometimes takes a lifetime to sort it out to find yourself.When you are traumatized it's even harder.


For one half of a population to be able to bully ,exploit,dominate and control the other half there has to be 2 BELIEFS about self and relationships to others ,believed....

The bully half must be conditioned to assume they are ENTITLED to use and abuse others(might makes right) for thier own amusement,poision containers,power trips or wealth gathering..and that this is"normal"
This half must be desensitized to the pain others feel and feel no shame at violating or using others as objects..

While the other half of the population i.e. those who can live and let live,who are sensitive,compassionate,creative, and different and can get along with others without having control over them need to be taught servitude,to supress thier voices of outrage,endure and desensitize themselves to thier own suffering,adopt weakness, submission and be haunted to inaction by traumas done by abusers in thier lives.
As long as humankind is taught two UNEQUAL ways of relating to others,there will be no peace on Earth.


When will more of humanity have the courage to see this horribly entrenched interpersonal/social abuse dynamic for what it IS?
When will this whole sick game people play to STOP?
Does it really take total ruin of humankind and the planet to stop this horrible sick entrenched cultural game of the abuser and abused ?

I would hope someday somehow PTSD becomes an archaic curiosity, not because the data was twisted for political interests or drugs that are invented to dull and desensitize people to abuse were widespread, But because people saw through this massive worldwide game of make belive for real...and woke up... Finally stopped letting one half of humanity abuse the other and stoped the abusers from destroying the world for thier profit and sick control games .


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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-04-05 11:10 PM
Response to Original message
16. Count me in.
Physical, emotional abuse, lived in a violent community, beaten and abused at school. The worst were religious fanatics.

Was in a very stressful job with responsibilities that shouldn't be given to a 20 year old.

Sat alone behind a machine gun in the dark waiting for several thousand soldiers to descend on our site. I had never fired a 60mm. My gun overlooked the front gate. We had enough ammo for 5 minutes sustained battle. The guy next to me was catatonic.

Nothing happen, no army marched on us. Certain death was just a drill. They didn't tell us it was a drill.

I have held secrets inside me for over 3 decades. They eat you from the inside. I only know of one declassified, and that is the USS Liberty murders. I nearly went crazy when they told me I was free to discuss it. If I can't speak of it, it didn't happen.

A few years ago I went in as a volunteer for an ADD study. Two hours later the doctor said I don't have ADD, but I am the "poster child for PTSD."

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scarlet_owl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 08:35 AM
Response to Original message
17. An abusive relationship. I was hit and sexually assaulted
regularly for four years until I just couldn't take it anymore.
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