Another body blow -- I just don't know what to do

[northernlights]

I got a letter from UMA financial aid today. They are cutting off my financial aid in the spring. Nobody ever bothered to mention to be, until I was halfway through the program and $20K in debt, that my transfer credits would put me over some limit before I could finish. Half way through the program I will have no way to finish unless I am able to sell my house before then. And without finishing I will have no way to pay back the loans I currently have because at $11 fucking crappy bucks/hour I can't support myself let alone pay back the school loans.

I cannot believe this. I am beyond disbelief. I have fucking worked myself half to death maintaining a 4.0 in pre-med sciences. For what. To be ruined financially and dumped on the trash heap of our society by University of Maine Augusta. Land of craven thugs and thieves.

I fucking hate this country. I'm sorry. I realize some of you have fared better than I and don't want to hear any negativity about our society because you're going through some shift to nirvana. But I've been ruined. Absolutely ruined. I scrimped and saved for years, and been robbed of everything, with no future and nothing to look forward to but watching my animals suffer, and losing them one at a time and working shit jobs for shit pay until I'm in the street.

I fuckikng hate America. I want to die. I don't see any future for myself except working at shit jobs until I'm bankrupt and they auctioni my house out from under to finish the robbery. I am telling you this. I will hold out as long as I can for my babies, but once it comes down to them leaving me broke and in the street I will burn this house to the ground and kill myself. They can try to collect their mother fucking loans from a corpse and a burnt out hole in the ground.

[Shallah Kali]

1. (((NorthernLights)))

I am so sorry. I wish I could help more. :hug:

[demgrrrll]

2. I dont know what to say. You dont know me but I have been in some

of the direst circumstances imaginable and I can tell you from experience there is always a way. Always.
I feel that there is something or someone you dont know or have not met yet that will be of great assistance to you. You just have to reach out and grab the hand when it is offered. I was in a similar position one time, no money and thought my school career was over and I was never going to get my degree. I could not afford my apartment and I was going to try and move somewhere else. One night, a few days before I was scheduled to move there was a knock on the door, a woman was there and she said I live in this complex and I know you are living here by yourself and we could move into one apartment and split the rent and you can stay, she had a degree in psychology and she helped me figure out ways of getting money I did not know about, drove me everywhere and then about a year later after I had everything in line she moved away. I often think what would have happened to me if I had not let her in and literally let a total stranger move in my apartment with me. Miracles can and do happen. Hang in there.

[OneGrassRoot]

3. I don't blame you....

for feeling as you do. I'd be pissed at the world, too. You're tired and it feels something/someone keeps kicking you while you're down.

It pisses me off just reading about what you're going through, to be honest. It feels like one of those stories that should be reported to the local consumer affairs reporter in your area. Shine the light on another example of how extreme BS and red tape are ruining lives.

I'm sorry I have nothing helpful to offer to ease your struggle.

:(

As always, I do send heartfelt hugs of support. :hug:

[lady lib]

4. Wow, that's ridiculous.

Please make an appointment to discuss your situation with the financial aid office. Ask them ahead of time if you'll need to bring any documentation with you. Who knows, maybe there was a mistake, or maybe you can show them why you should still qualify for aid. It's worth a shot.

Also, post this (minus the expletives because they're not allowed) in the financial aid forum of collegeconfidential.com. There are some very knowledgeable people who might be able to help you.

Good luck! :hug:

[glinda]

6. I agree. Northernlights....I feel your anger and pain as I have been ruined by my student loans,

people not telling me what I needed to know, shit jobs,on and on....
I too hate this F@#$#@@ Country and how it mistreats many just so a few can be wealthy. But you need to talk to someone about this to see if there is any chance this can be worked out.
Do not give up your home. Get a deferment or something. Make a plan to sell you home if you must but you need to take care of your pets. And take care of yourself. I am soooo sorry this is happening to you. Please calm down. Give it some time to work itself out because it might.

[Why Syzygy]

5. I'm sorry, NL.

I'm upset with our country too. I am sick to pieces of criminals.

There IS a new program to handle student loans. Whereas in the past you might have suffered mercilessly, this new deal is much easier >
https://www.dl.ed.gov/borrower/BorrowerWelcomePage.jsp

There is still hope you can sell your house. But you have to live somewhere.

Don't give up.

[winyanstaz]

7. Dear Northern lights....

My heart goes out to you. I and two of my sons had to move in with each other after I lost my home due to a toxic morgage when my husband died and one of my sons was laid off. It sucks when they pull the rug out from under you like that.
I personnally believe however that there will be a major shift in society and civilization and even if you and I had gotten to stay or be where we needed to be..it would still all fall apart..because that is what civilizations do when they fall.
America as we knew it is dying.
What we DESPERATLY need though is for intelligent and caring people like you to stick around though..because you will be badly needed to help put the pieces back together again and build a new and better world.
Wish I could help you more at this time though. At the least.... know you have people in the world that care a lot and are pulling for you.

[Delphinus]

8. {{hugs}}

I hear you, my friend. I feel your pain, your anger, your frustration. :hug:

[elleng]

9. NL, I agree with lady lib and glinda.

Write to them and see them. Don't stop. There are usually things that can be done in such circumstances, and you may have to be creative in seeking them out.

:hug:

[get the red out]

10. I don't blame you at all

I think we are courting the destruction of our society by not having higher education be free! I am so sorry northernlights, they have definitely done wrong by you, you were not given some extremely important information that affects every decision in your life, that is simply wrong, no way around it.

If there are any financial advisors you can talk to at the school please talk to them and explain exactly what has happened. It may be for nothing but they should know they screwed up in a way that is completely changing someone's whole life.

Praying for you.

[Sienna86]

12. Don't stop trying

Northernlights, you have every right to be angry. It isn't fair. You have so much to offer this world. You have special talents and gifts. Take one step at a time to combat this predicament. I agree that talking to a financial aid person at your school would be a good start. That or the web site that was mentioned might offer an idea. We will be here for you as you work your way through this. And remember, it's always darkest before the dawn.

Hugs.

[I Have A Dream]

11. northernlights, most of all, I feel your exhaustion from your post.

I know that you are soul weary and physically weary down to your bones. I'm asking for the Universe to help you to find a solution to this situation and that it be quick and easy. Please don't give up. In addition to your animals needing you, we need you and the world needs you and your light.

Please do what you have to do to take care of yourself. I'm really not trying to minimize what you're going through because I know that you've had so many seemingly bad breaks, but maybe just try to find a little bit of time to soak in a hot bath and breathe.

You have my utmost respect, sweet northernlights. If you ever get to the point where you truly are feeling that you're going to do something desperate, please, please, please think about what you will feel on the other side afterwards. Please call a professional hotline immediately at that point! :(

You have many people here who love you, my friend. Although we're not there with you physically, we are there with you in spirit. You are not alone.

:hug:

:grouphug:

[Dora]

13. .

Feelings of anger and frustration are perfectly rational. Please don't allow your feelings to knock you off your path. Ideating arson and suicide as an act of vengeance are not good ideas for anyone to be thinking about themselves. Please, be kind and loving to yourself, especially when the world throws a rock like this through your window. You have to advocate for yourself, and be your own best counsel.

I agree with others here that talking to a financial aid counselor is a good idea. A letter can't respond to you. Find a counselor at the Fin. Aid office and gently tell them about the letter, explain your situation and ask them the question - what can I do here? And listen to their answer. Ask more questions. Ask if their decision/policy is based on internal/university policy or federal law. It could be that their hands are tied on the matter.

I understand how dreadful dealing with university bureaucracy can be. You have to remember that many of these people (of which I have been one) are often only listening with one ear, and speaking with half a mind. Your best weapons in these interactions will be presence, patience, and emotional detachment.

I am truly sorry that the system has failed you in this way. Have faith in yourself. Do what you can, and don't be afraid of the rest.

Some ideas.... You've carried a 4.0, perhaps scholarships are an option for you? Also, I wonder if there's some action to be taken re: the realtor that swindled you, or the bad survey you had.

[moonbeam23]

14. OMG

That is really shitty...:mad: The other posters are right...America is dying a self-inflicted death and everybody seems to be getting screwed except the elite...(Michael Moore's new movie is spot on)

i know how good those fantasies can feel at the time...my favorite was going up Mt Shasta and just lying down and never getting up...everything was so overwhelming...

Abandoning your babies is unthinkable to you of course, so you WILL stay strong and work all this out for their sake...all the other advice was very good...and if you know an astrologer, have them look up the best day and time to contact people...planetary hours really really make all the difference sometimes...

Sending lots of love and light to you...and so are my kitties (they are really powerful on the astral lol):hug:

[Callie McAllie]

15. I am so sorry this is happening, but please try to stay positive and constructive

I agree with the others who've posted that there's got to be a way to finish, if you can just hang in there, stay calm, keep plugging. Talk to the counselors, by all means, bring it to the attention of the media, as someone else said.

I'd also suggest you contact Maine medical associations or hospitals - they may have or be aware of scholarship programs you can access, since you have such good grades and are going into medicine.

Good luck!

[BlueIris]

16. You have a PM. nt

[southerncrone]

17. This country is going down the tubes. But don't go down with it, northernlights!

I want to think you are overreacting to this newest development based on your past experiences of late, & your level of exhaustion from doing too much at once.

You've gotten some really good advice on this thread already. I might just add that oft times those "letters" are computer generated form-letters, triggered to automatically print. Take that letter & go to the Fin Aid office at UMA; speak to a counselor there, or the director. Explain your situation & the information that was withheld. As I see it, part of the fall of our society is directly attributable to the lack of personal, human connections we no longer have w/one another because of the proliferation of technology.

If you don't get satisfaction there then hit these:
1. Go higher up at UMA...dean of students, chancellor or president of UMA
2. Speak w/your professors about the situation, some of them may know some options
>Often it only takes a "certain person's signature" to override a "requirement"
3. Your state representative & senators
4. U.S. Representative & Senators
5. The media (they love a good sensationalized story)


I know this thought may be hard to accept, but perhaps this is The Universe's way of telling you that you are trying to do too much at one time. Could you "adopt out" some of your babies, maybe on a temporary basis? Perhaps board more babies for others for pay? Could you take in a roommate to ease the financial load? Think outside the box.

I do want to caution you against making rash statements on an Internet forum. I'd strongly suggest you retract those more outrages comments. Insurance cos. will use them against you (stating premeditation) if they can, instead of paying out claims.

There are options galore out there, you just have to find them.
This sounds so much like Saturn forcing you to make those hard decisions (plus the moon conjunct your sun).
We need you here. :loveya: NOTHING is bad enough to exit your mission prematurely. I confess that I have also wanted to "take the easy escape route" lately because this country seems so screwed up & screwing most of it's citizens. Then I got mad & said NO! I have a right to be here & a mission to accomplish. There are going to be challenges to overcome, but that is part of what "life" involves. Take heart, there are lessons here that have nothing to do with UMA. You WILL persevere!
You've come too far to give up now! Don't let the bastards get you down, you're tougher than them!

Sending you all the love & light I can gather, northernlights. I can think of no one who deserves it more. Use our light to re-energize yourself. Become that Phoenix that rises out of these ashes.
:hug:

[I Have A Dream]

18. Hear, hear!

:thumbsup:

[NuttyFluffers]

19. visualize a pair of beautiful spiky stiletto heels... and throw it at them.

:P

we all gotta let out our poison at some point before we go back to being cheerful. hope that visual image brightens your day!

and stick in there; if you fight, fight, fight, you'll be surprised how understanding the bureaucracy can be. :hug:

[2Design]

20. Not having a good day I see - This too shall pass - in the meantime

hang in there

[LiberalEsto]

21. Sending you blessings

and hoping that something good will happen very soon.

:hug:

[uberblonde]

22. PLEASE call your congressperson.

This is exactly the sort of constituent service they offer. You'd be amazed at how reasonable people can be when they get a call from a congressman's office.

[Kind of Blue]

23. I agree Uberblonde.

My sister went through a similar experience with school loans and called our then-Congresswoman Morella (a Republican!), after fighting for months and under threats of not allowing her back. An assistant was all over the school the next day and got a resolution in her favor within days. We also called Morella's office when a seniors' apartment building with full-time nursing staff refused to accept my late-blind Uncle because he was 4 years too young. She got personally involved in that one and resolved it. Even Senator Sarbanes office came to the rescue once. They seemed to enjoy fighting crooks at the local level.

Please call your state rep Northernlights. I think your case is right up their alley. :hug:

[MorningGlow]

24. Oh NL

I just saw this. Sending you much light.

Just remember--you're a fighter--that's why you have chosen to take all this on. I know things look dark right now, but you will find a way. I agree with the posts upthread--definitely visit the financial aid office and read them the riot act. They're there to HELP students stay in school, not pitch them out indiscriminately.

Hey, you know marketing--just threaten to make your situation very, VERY public. :evilgrin:

Pulling for you, NL. Please hang in there, and no more talk about dying, you hear? Please also check in with an update so we know you're okay! :hug: :hug: :hug:

[BanzaiBonnie]

25. This is terrible

I'm thinking of you.

[crikkett]

26. (((NorthernLights)))

Hang in there. I am sorry that you're losing your financial aid. I hope you find some relief.