THE SEVEN P's OF MEN'S VIOLENCE ~ Michael Kaufman Ph.D

[mzmolly]

~ snip ~

The very ways that men have constructed our social and individual power is, paradoxically, the source of enormous fear, isolation, and pain for men ourselves. If power is constructed as a capacity to dominate and control, if the capacity to act in "powerful" ways requires the construction of a personal suit of armor and a fearful distance from others, if the very world of power and privilege removes us from the world of child-rearing and nurturance, then we are creating men whose own experience of power is fraught with crippling problems.

This is particularly so because the internalized expectations of masculinity are themselves impossible to satisfy or attain. This may well be a problem inherent in patriarchy, but it seems particularly true in an era and in cultures where rigid gender boundaries have been overthrown. Whether it is physical or financial accomplishment, or the suppression of a range of human emotions and needs, the imperatives of manhood (as opposed to the simple certainties of biological maleness), seem to require constant vigilance and work, especially for younger men.

The personal insecurities conferred by a failure to make the masculine grade, or simply, the threat of failure, is enough to propel many men, particularly when they are young, into a vortex of fear, isolation, anger, self-punishment, self-hatred, and aggression.

Within such an emotional state, violence becomes a compensatory mechanism. It is a way of re-establishing the masculine equilibrium, of asserting to oneself and to others ones masculine credentials. This expression of violence usually includes a choice of a target who is physically weaker or more vulnerable. This may be a child, or a woman, or, as it may be social groups, such as gay men, or a religious or social minority, or immigrants, who seem to pose an easy target for the insecurity and rage of individual men, especially since such groups often haven't received adequate protection under the law. (This compensatory mechanism is clearly indicated, for example, in that most 'gay-bashing' is committed by groups of young men in a period of their life when they experience the greatest insecurity about making the masculine grade.)

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http://www.whiteribbon.ca/educational_materials/default.asp?load=seven

With all that is happening in our world, I found this a very interesting read.

[mzmolly]

1. Very good info at his website as well:

http://www.michaelkaufman.com/articles/index.html

[Nikia]

2. Men need to realize that patriarchy makes it tough on them too

There are men in my life who do realize that something is wrong with patriarchy, not only from women's standpoints, but also their own. Individual men may choose to act on their own: letting themselves be emotional in ways other than anger, being nuturing fathers, and discouraging violence in their own sons. On a larger scale, men seem to be afraid though.

[bloom]

3. His 7 "P"s:

1...Patriarchal Power

2...The Sense of Entitlement to Privilege

3...Permission (Society giving permission for men to be violent)

4...The Paradox of Men's Power (power is... the source of enormous fear, isolation, and pain for men ourselves)

5...The Psychic Armour of Manhood (emotional distance from others)

6...Masculinity as a Psychic Pressure Cooker ( the internalization of a range of emotions and their redirection into anger)

7...Past (violent) Experiences

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Just to recap on this thread, also.

Link to other thread:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x3410715

[_TJ_]

4. I really like this article

I think it speaks an enormous amount of truth. I've often felt
pressure (especially when I was young) to conform to a certain
template of what constitutes a 'real man'.

I must admit, my inability to meet this ideal has caused me to suffer
both pain and indignity at the hands of other men. :(

Perhaps this template will erode over time and men of all
personality types will be accepted by their own sex.

[mzmolly]

5. I hope so TJ

Sorry about the negative experiences you've had. I think acknowledging that all are hurt these attitudes is important.