I am sorry bisexuals.

[ccharles000]

I had a friend come out as bi a couple of days ago and I thought that it was a phase because she had only dated guys and seemed really happy with them(I know my thinking was stupid). I am sad to say that I am one of many who does not really believe in bisexuality until now. I was thinking really hard and have realized I was a hypocrite and that I should support everyone in my community. So I am sorry to all the bi people here.

[Trajan]

1. .

:eyes:

[baby_mouse]

2. Hey!

That's mean-spirited. Be nice! OP is being nice so you should try too!

[movonne]

8. I think about 80% of the population is bi...just don't know it...

[galledgoblin]

10. agreed

it's hard to acknowledge because so much of the population lives in total denial!

[movonne]

12. Or the right circumstances didn't come up..I think that is just the way

humans are born..

[Fearless]

16. I would tend to believe that more than denial...

Then again my opinion is rather jaded.

[Toasterlad]

3. I Used To Disbelieve in Bisexuality, Too.

Although I'm not well acquainted with anyone (as far as I know) who identifies as bisexual, I did attend a seminar on that subject a few years ago, which changed my mind on the subject. While it's difficult for me to understand how someone could be attracted to either gender, I get that it's difficult for straight people to understand why I love man ass. In other words, screw me and my preconceived notions: people are free to fuck whomever they want.

Not sure that I (or you) owe bisexuals a blanket apology, though. Our acceptance of them probably means as little to them as their acceptance of us means to us.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

4. thanks. thats very sweet of you.

:hug:

[Fovea]

5. I ran a men's wiccan circle for a bit

back in the early eighties while the Priest who founded it had family problems.

I finally got used to the 'I think it's so nice of a straight guy to fill in for our HP.' comments.

I finally figured out that my identity both smacked into whatever insecurities they wrestled with about their orientation, their ability to 'compete' with a woman's attentions, the idea of a bright line of demarcation regarding preference.

I personally think part of what makes sexuality so binary in this culture is the need for simplicity in one's core needs. Sadly, life is often a bit more bell curved thing than 1 or 0.

Having gotten that off my chest. Thank you for being this woman's friend.
That is what being human looks like.

[terrya]

6. I'm ashamed to say that I felt the same way.

In the past, I scoffed at the idea of bisexuality. I thought it was a sort of copout. I used to think in shades of black and white, so to speak. Either you were gay or you were straight. Period.

I know now that I was completely wrong and I want to apologize to my bisexual friends here.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

7. tis ok. i still think you are the cats whiskers!

[rox63]

9. Bisexuality is even more confusing to young people than being gay

Young people (teens) are just finding themselves sexually, and most really just want to fit in with their peers. Knowing that you absolutely are attracted to one gender and not the other has some comfort to it. Feeling attraction to people of both genders in my teens caused me to freak out somewhat, deny the attraction to people of my gender, and later on, get myself into a bad marriage, thinking that I'd never have to think about the issue again. I'm much older and wiser now, divorced 15 years ago, and I'm comfortable with my sexuality. But it was a painful journey getting here. I spent my youth feeling like some sort of freak, afraid I would be rejected by both the gay and straight communities. There are some folks in the gay community who resent bi folks, because they think bi's can "pass" as straight. Maybe they can "pass", but not without lying to themselves.

[DarkTirade]

13. Yeah, despite the fact that I was raised in a very non-homophobic environment

it still took me until I was 19 to realize that I was bi.

Although part of that might have just been 'cause high school guys are generally jerks and there weren't many I was interested in. :P

[Firespirit]

21. That's true in my experience, definitely

Because I don't wanna repost, my wordy answer to a semi-recent GD post also by ccharles.

It really screws teens up if they don't have accurate information and support. I'm finally trying to untangle my sexual f'd-upitude, and there is one major, major issue about being bi that I really don't know how to resolve (mentioned in the link): Commitment phobia, on steroids. Identifying as "bi" means that I might have to decide on one person and deny the urges for people of a different gender. It's not quite the same as a monosexual's concern over "Is this the right person." There is a constant specter of feeling attraction to both but knowing that you could only have one. Monogamous commitment for bis doesn't just mean "no more fun"; it means shutting off part of yourself.

I guess there is one positive; if I end up with a man, we both can enjoy his Playboys. :shrug:

To ccharles: It may well be that you denied bisexuality for that reason -- that to you, people were just confused and hadn't found the right person(s), and once they did, they'd figure out whether they were straight or gay. I'd love that to be correct, actually, but I can't convince myself that it is.

[galledgoblin]

11. I would like to characterize myself as being in the 80-90 percentile

very homosexual with the occasional hetero relationship- but the stereotypes and assumptions that are tied into bisexuality make it hard to say "I am bi" without assholes making commentary.

I expect that, long after equal rights for homosexuals are a reality, bisexuals will still be seeking to end those stereotypes and assumptions.

[bicentennial_baby]

14. Thanks babe

It's ok. :hug:

[porcelain_doll]

15. I'm glad.

I know when I came out, you were skeptical but I'm glad you've come around. :)

[David Zephyr]

17. Most people are bi-sexual.

Whether it upsets straights or gays, it is simply the biological truth...an inconvenient truth.

[NewYorker83]

18. I must admit

I still raise an eyebrow to the notion of bisexuality, however, we are under the same umbrella of fighting for equality. I do apologize for my prejudice, but it's more about the argument from the right who say, "See, it's a choice!" I have a very close friend who is bi and in an open marriage with her husband... We all must keep fighting against the right.... I was in 2 heterosexual relationships in high school. Long periods of time and never went beyond maybe the friendly kiss. Every one of us is unique and different... That diversity should be celebrated not shunned... I will work on my own prejudice to have a better understanding of every one that does encompass GLBT! Is it just me or has the topic of bisexuality from mainstream conversation seemed to have just disappeared? Up until now I don't believe I've seen it pop up!

[SarahB]

22. on choice

I suppose in some sense, bisexuals do make a choice if they remain monogamous to one partner (I like your friend's plan better though), but that isn't the same as advocating suppression of truths and remaining in the closet for gay and lesbian people. The topic doesn't exist a lot and if you're in a committed relationship to one gender and bi, to be "out" often brings a lot of questions that most people aren't able to understand when it comes to answers. Our community and sources of support are much smaller sometimes.

[Toasterlad]

24. Bisexuality Is Not Any More of a Choice Than Homosexuality or Heterosexuality.

A bisexual can "choose" to date men exclusively or "choose" to date women exclusively, but they can't choose not to be sexually attracted to both men and women.

[qb]

19. That is kind of you. What I don't understand is how commonly people deny what a person says...

about his or her identity. When someone says "I'm bi"... it sure takes gall to say "No you're not."
Same with "I may have female DNA but I am a man."
Who knows better than the person who is living it?

[libnnc]

20. I felt that way when I was young and first came out

...and conveniently forgot my own previous hetero relationships

then I grew up.

Age brings wisdom.

[Karl_Bonner_1982]

23. I think I'm at least a little bit bi

I'm a man who's overwhelmingly attracted to men. My sexual experience is exclusively gay. But I am very curious as to what straight sex is like. The only problem is I am VERY bashful, and how do you approach a woman and say "I'm mostly gay and have never slept with a woman, but I'd like to try it. However I don't want to commit myself to a hetero relationship. Will you sleep with me?" (LOL....)