The straight gay alliance I advise didn't make our yearbook

[dsc]

Our yearbooks came out this week and the straight gay alliance, whose picture I sent on time, wasn't in it. I have been told it is a mistake though I admit to it seeming awfully convenient mistake. Sadly the only thing which can be done at this point is to be sure our picture is taken by them, instead of electronically submitted by me. This isn't the end of the world, but along with the blood, it stung a bit.

So, any advice or opinions about this mistake?

[Ian David]

1. I sense some douchebaggery afoot. n/t

[dsc]

3. some of my straight teacher friends were close to foaming at the mouth over this

I actually had to calm some of them down.

[Kali]

5. It sure feels that way to me, too.

[TomInTib]

2. Who edits the yearbook?

Students or faculty, ultimately?

(And I know that is not a complete sentence, but I don't want to hear about it, teacher.)

(And I know better to start a sentence with "And", but I don't care about that, either.)

[dsc]

7. student editted, faculty advised

the picture was sent to the faculty advisor, who admits to getting it on time, the student editor claims not to have gotten it, so I don't know who is to blame.

[libnnc]

8. the student is lying

that's bullshit.

I'd grill the student.

[TomInTib]

11. I will guarantee you the student is lying.

That is such blatant bullshit.

But it won't do any good to stir it up. That will only upset your group.

Walk it through, next time.

Goodness, dsc, this has certainly been one hell of a School Year for you, hasn't it?

[dsc]

12. yeah it surely has

I feel in this case I let them down by not following up as much as I could have. I really felt they would follow through since I even directly asked at the time if they wanted pics from the straight gay alliance as well as a different club I was a temporary advisor for and I was told to send both. The editor happened to be a member of the other club so that picture got taken by yearbook staff.

[TomInTib]

13. Don't worry about it

not a damn thing you can do but learn from this one.

You know how it is.

Enjoy your Summer.

Tom

[dsc]

14. thanks

Nothing like a mistake to get you to learn something. I will enjoy my summer and will also be prepared, very prepared, for next year.

[ThomCat]

16. I wonder if that student editor happens to be religious.

:(

[Ian David]

18. For all we know, there was a student in the photo who had second thoughts...

... and begged that it not be published.

There's also the possibility that it was an honest mistake by the student editor.

[dsc]

21. the first theory is very hard to believe as I know all the students in the photo

and none had second thoughts. It could be a simple mistake, though very convenient. I don't know what to think at this point.

[libnnc]

4. who are they saying made the "mistake"?

the yearbook staff or the publisher?

I'd ask for a sitdown with the yearbook advisor.

[xchrom]

6. sorry dude -- i really am. you've put a lot of effort in this.

i'm guessing here -- but two things.

first is to stay on top of this and let them know that there are feelings of hurt, rejection and anger.

second -- make them take the photos next year and stay on top of it?

try to follow the photos through the process as best as possible.

[dsc]

10. the thing which really pisses me off over this is that I am one of the few club advisors

who did what we were told to do (take the photos after school and submit them electronically) instead of getting kids out of class and having the yearbook photographer take them (rest assured they will be taking my club's picture next year).

[xchrom]

15. yeah -- that's what you're going to have to do.

i don't think it's unreasonable to think that something smells fishy in denmark.

[msongs]

9. youneed to find out the name of person who made the "mistake" - accountability nt

[Ian David]

17. It could have been worse....

Metro firm apologizes for yearbook photos
Topic started by LaStrega on May-17-08 07:40 PM (9 replies)
Last modified by nicholas9999 on May-18-08 02:17 AM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=103&topic_id=359906

[dsc]

19. yikes

In this day and age I really can't see how this could happen. Yearbooks are all electronic now.

[Ian David]

20. Apparently, the company thought the school WANTED fucked-up pictures in their yearbook

There was a misunderstanding about what the school wanted the photos to look like.

Uhm... yeah.

[DarkTirade]

22. I smell a load of carp somewhere in the yearbook staff.

Or at least something fishy.

[bliss_eternal]

23. I call bullshit.

Seriously, what kind of mistake would dictate the gay/straight alliance wasn't included?

Whatever CAN be done at this point, I would do it.
The kids involved in this group need to feel they are being included, even if there is an attempt to disclude them. Also, it will make a statement to those that come after them(other classes, etc.). There will always be gay children, and there will always be those that support and care about them (i.e. friends, classmates, etc.) They need recognition as much as the sports teams and the other clubs and activities.

Btw, it's wonderful you advise this group. :applause: I'm very sorry that the powers that be, seem hell bent on making this as challenging as they can for you. Hang in there. What you are doing matters.

:hug:

[insleeforprez]

24. I think it's a fair statement

that you didn't start the GSA to get into the yearbook. You started it to bring hope and support to struggling teenagers, and you are doing just that. No one reads yearbooks :)

[dsc]

29. I understand that

but I am still pissed both at the yearbook and myself. I usually follow up better on things than I did in this instance. It is one of those live and learn moments. I will force the issue next year by having them take the picture during school hours like all the other clubs did.

[Ian David]

31. You can't blame yourself for assuming that you wouldn't get robbed. n/t

[Ian David]

30. The exclusion of The GSA from the yearbook illustrates all the more WHY you need the club.

Next year, you can tell them, you won't be invisible.

And you can ask the school to print next year's yearbook with photos of BOTH GSA Clubs, along with an explanation and an apology.

You should ask them to also provide free copies of the next year's yearbook (with two years worth of GSA photos) to everyone in The GSA Club who graduates this year.

[LeftCoast]

25. You have far more patience than me.

No way would I put up with the homophobia you've dealt with. That school doesn't deserve you.

Wish I could offer some useful advice about this situation. :(

[dsc]

33. I have been gratified by the reactions of my straight coworkers

they have been awesome. I live in NC, some of that is good, some of that is bad.

[LeftyMom]

26. I would ask for the email records to see who dropped the ball.

You can show you sent the photo to the yearbook advisor. The advisor says it was sent to the student editor. Was it really sent and received? Is that who dropped the ball, or was it passed on to another student who did? Was there any communication to or within the yearbook staff regarding inclusion of the GSA? Did somebody object?

The only way to make sure this "mistake" (and I don't buy for a minute it's a mistake, but I'm a suspicious sort) isn't repeated is to insist, gently but firmly, on accountability. Especially in this case, you need to be able to give the GSA students a honest answer about whether their exclusion was an accident, which means that you need to know who omitted the photo, and if possible why or how that happened.

[Creideiki]

27. Wow. The students did so much good stuff this year, too.

They really deserved to get to see this in their yearbooks.

[dsc]

28. In fairness our activities pretty much all fell after their deadline

so there was no way pics of the activities would be in there, this was simply a club photo.

[dsc]

32. update

I emailed the advisor and asked for a better explanation. I got a pretty snippy email in response pretty much saying it was a mistake and comparing it to mispelling a name and a word in a senior ad. So I guess there won't be a real answer.

[libnnc]

34. I hope you can see this post....that advisor is an ass

leaving out an entire group picture from the yearbook is not equivalent to a misspelled name. Did they offer any kind of apology at all?

[dsc]

35. she said she was sorry

but the tone of the email was pretty much mistakes happen, tough shit.

[kdpeters]

36. Have some of your GSA members join the yearbook staff.

That will teach them a good lesson about activism, working within the system to create change and how to make lemonade out of lemons by channeling that energy into something positive.

A couple of questions:
Was the GSA page still there with a description of its mission, list of officers, etc etc, everything BUT the picture, or was there no page at all, no mention that the organization even exists? If the page was there but only the picture didn't make it in, were there any other organizations that were listed without a picture?

If you're group wasn't even mentioned at all or if your group was the only one listed without a picture, then you can be fairly confident it wasn't a mistake. There's no way you can prove that and, as you said, nothing that can be done now to retroactively insert it. This time they got away with it because you have no one on the inside looking out for you at a point in the process where something CAN be done about it. It's too late for this year, but that's one of the lessons you need to be teaching them. Activism is always a long-term struggle. There will always be setbacks. Learn from the past, but look toward the future.

What do you think about being an assistant adviser to the yearbook staff? Any offer to volunteer even a little bit of time and energy should be appreciated. Just a little participation by one person aware of and sympathetic to your concerns may be all that's needed to solve the problem. If it doesn't solve the problem with participation, at least then you are in a position to force the conflict out into the light where you have the moral high ground. They don't get off the hook with plausible deniability and "oopsing" your organization out of existence. I was on yearbook staff and found yearbook to be an immensely rewarding experience. There really is no downside that I can see from my vantage.

One thing you can do right now is to write a letter to the yearbook staff, the adviser, and the principle expressing how disappointed GSA members were to be left out. However unintentional that may have been, disappointing nonetheless. Express your desire to work with them so as to understand what you might have done differently to ensure your place or what improvements they might make so that other student groups in the future don't have be left out of their senior yearbook over a miscommunication.

Keep it positive, but by all means, say something. You definitely don't want to let it go unmentioned. Put it in writing and start keeping records of these things. Should you, God forbid, ever have to take your case to a higher authority like the principle or the school board or even the courts, you're going to need to be able to establish a pattern and an effort on your part to seek resolution before you escalate. If you're suspicious now, then start preparing now. If you haven't kept a record of suspicious incidents and your responses, by the time you are sure of something fishy happening, they've already gotten away with too much and you'll have nothing but your word against theirs.

[dsc]

37. Yearbook is a class so unless they already signed up we are probably out of luck

but I will look into that. We were left completely out of the yearbook since most clubs only had a club picture and of course we didn't. I will grant that much of our activism was after their deadline so that would explain no pictures of our events but that doesn't excuse the lack of the other photo. To my knowledge, no other club was so left out, but we also may have been the only club which didn't have the yearbook staff take the photo (they couldn't come after school and we weren't supposed to take pics during class time but most did exactly that).

I have saved both the emails from this and from the banning of my taking part in day of silence. I know that we won't get totally equal treatment but I am trying to avoid totally unfair treatment. I really feel for the seniors who were the first gay kids at our school and who deserved to be in that yearbook.

I greatly appreciate your advice and plan to see about implimenting it.

[kdpeters]

38. It's been a long time since I did yearbook, and I know a lot of things have changed

but I'm sure of one thing: they're still very expensive to produce. Those glossy yearbook pages are expensive. Multiplied over a number times a percentage of the student body and each page becomes so expensive as to require strict budgeting. The fact that you were told "I didn't get the picture" to explain why your organization is completely missing just rings really suspicious to me.

If your had been accounted for in the layout, they would have had an empty placeholder budgeted for you reminding them constantly that they still needed to fill it with something. Real estate on a printed yearbook page is expensive. You can't just whimsically add and subtract pages to the yearbook because of the impact just one or two can have on a tight budget.

They were clearly organized enough to have a list of student organizations so that knew which clubs needed to be called out of class to take their pictures. Was your club just this year officially recognized? If that's the case, it's plausible that the lists they were working off of didn't have you listed because you were a new entity at the school and they've been working off the same list since the beginning of the school year. Still, that's just a normal part of the duties of publishing the yearbook is to keep on top of all the changes from new students, married names taken or even recognition for special awards. That's part of their commitments and that's a pretty give failure that big should have been met profuse apology. "I didn't get the picture" just doesn't cut it

My older brother was killed his sophomore year of high school. My sophomore year would have been his senior year and his class had a full page memorial to him in the yearbook that year. I had made a point to go around to all of his friends(he had a LOT) in his class to get as many of them as I could to sign my yearbook. Many of them did a great deal more than simply sign their name with "Best Wishes". Many actually wrote some very touching words to me and remembrances of my brother. People were having trouble finding enough blank space to write in because so many of his friends took the time and thought to tell me what was in their hearts. It was very special to me. I read it over and over and over. The last week of school, my yearbook was stolen out of a classroom during an assembly. I was absolutely crushed and went home and sobbed my eyes out. I couldn't believe it. Out of everyone in that classroom, out of everyone in my school, why mine? There was no one in the whole school who cherished their yearbook like I cherished mine. Why did they have to take mine? The adviser gave me a "replacement" at no charge. At least I still have the yearbook with his memorial, but when I look at it, all I see are all those missing inscriptions that meant so much to me.

I'm not trying to upstage your story with that anecdote and I don't really have a point to make except that I feel like I can relate to the way you describe your seniors being deprived of that recognition of their accomplishment in the yearbook. It brought back that memory in a powerful way and I just had to tell someone. Maybe they'll look back like me and see the special thing that isn't there. They'll be fine, but it really does suck and for no good reason at all.

[dsc]

39. first I am so sorry that really sucks

I never thought of the layout issue. Now that you say it, it makes perfect sense. I will have to take a close look at someone's yearbook and figure out if it is possible that empty space was accounted for. There were three club pics per page if I recall correctly. I know they are still pretty expensive to produce so your point is well taken.

It should be noted they admit to having got my picture (the advisor) but once she got it she apparently didn't give it to the proper people to get processed. That, at least, is her story and she is sticking to it.

[dsc]

44. I checked

there were four clubs or teams (the athletic team photos were on the same pages) per page. They fit precisely with no left over space and took up 5 or 6 pages. In fairness to them they may not have had a master list of clubs so there was no check off list for that.

[noamnety]

40. having been both a GSA advisor and a yearbook advisor

I can sympathize with both of you. I had some years where I had a week solid of 3 or 4 hours of sleep a night trying to fix student generated errors, oversights, misspellings, missed names, etc. And we've had our moments of leaving out a photo of a teacher. After a run of no sleep and knowing you could not have fit more editing time into your schedule, you kind of have to have the attitude that what's done is done, and not beat yourself up over it. The note shouldn't have been snippy, obviously, but it does tend to be one of the really demanding jobs where you get zero thanks, only complaints, with no way to fix them once the book is done.

[dsc]

41. I really do get that

and pointed that out in my email. I simply wanted a true, honest, explanation fo what had occured and what could be done to keep it from occuring again.

[noamnety]

42. When I could pull it off

I used to print a draft of the entire book and bring it to a staff meeting, spread the whole thing out on a table, and let the staff proofread the whole thing. That way at least they could be jointly responsible for errors, if they didn't take the time to check it.

We have a small school, though. With a larger staff, that may have been unmanageable.

[dsc]

43. true we have a very large school

so that would be impractical.