No laughing matter" When is it OK to tell a gay joke?

[canis_lupus]

From early on, we learn not to make fun of others in a way that is hurtful and demeaning to them. Polite people don’t make fun of others’ physical and mental infirmities, for example. Jokes about mentally retarded people are the sign of a cad, not a bon vivant.

We also learn that jokes directed against some groups of people — like racial and religious minorities — can be especially harmful because of the discrimination, stigma and even violence the members of these groups have historically faced. Jokes at the expense of other groups of people — like politicians or lawyers — don’t raise the same kinds of concerns because the targets of the fun aren’t disadvantaged.

Jokes are often funny when they rely on some generalization about members of the group — some trait or characteristic they are widely believed to share, whether true or not. But this same reliance on stereotypes can reinforce prejudice. And prejudice is the first step toward harmful discrimination.

What’s acceptable when it comes to gay people? Very few of us would take the extreme position that it’s never acceptable for anyone ever to tell a joke of any kind about gays. Even the media watchdog group, the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD), is not so humorless.

Jokes about gays are not necessarily objectionable simply because they exploit some kinds of stereotypes about gays. Think of the stereotype of gay men as promiscuous, effeminate and obsessed with couture and entertainment. Those stereotypes were the basis for much of the humor in “Will & Grace,” which was a breakthrough triumph for the equal treatment of homosexuals on television.

http://www.washblade.com/2008/5-9/view/columns/12568.cfm

[ccharles000]

1. I think if you are gay you can tell gay jokes.

Or if you are gay friendly like kathy Griffin.

[MNBrewer]

2. when it's told with love and genuine affection.

[Occulus]

7. Or if you're Lisa Lampanelli

An equal-opportunity pie-lobber if there ever was one. Nobody's safe.

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=lisa+lampanelli&search_type=

[La Lioness Priyanka]

3. if you are gay or considered very gay friendly (margaret cho)

[insleeforprez]

4. When it's funny

Usually, jokes told by bigots tend to lack any comedic value.

[lightningandsnow]

5. So true.

Case in point: Larry the Cable guy isn't funny.

[galledgoblin]

6. agreed

good example of finding the line between humourous and hurtful:

http://the-isb.blogspot.com/2005/11/where-they-went-wrong-superman-and.html

parts of this made me laugh... others I felt were homophobic and made me uncomfortable.

[Amimnoch]

8. When every single person who hears it (not just the ones you are telling it to)

finds in non-offensive. When the intent of it is to amuse, and not intimidate, and no person who hears it is offended. It doesn't matter the makeup of the group around at the time, gender, race, sex, orientation... if every single person that hears the joke is neither intimidated, or offended by it.. then it is perfectly to tell a gay joke imo. I know quite a few of them. I'm also Cajun, and know and find quite amusing a very large range of Cajun jokes. imo at least.

[Toasterlad]

9. There Is NO Humor That SOMEONE Will Not Find Offensive.

People get outraged over nonsense every day.

Ever listen to Eddie Murphy's early material? Oh, so offensive, yet oh, so hilarious.

Humor is like pornography: you can't define it, but you know it when you see/hear it.

[BillSam]

10. There's a difference between a gay joke

and a fag joke.

If somebody gay (with a healthy attitude toward their sexuality) tells a joke, that's one thing. If somebody straight (with a negative attitude) it's another thing. It can even be the same joke. The joke teller and the context is key. The gay or gay friendly person may just be tweaking the community a bit, and if the joke deals in stereotyping they're aware -- and you're aware that they're aware-- that they're only having fun with stereotypes. (Admittedly, even gay comedians can be irritating if their jokes trade in stereotypes and you feel they really believe what they're saying, that they look upon the community with the same numbing narrowness as an unfriendly straight).

On my blogs I often joke about matters pertaining to the GLBT community -- I'm an Out and Proud Gay Guy -- and some people get mad as heck and others understand where I'm coming from.