A Few Thoughts For My GLBT Friends on Shepherd vs. foxx.

MarianJack

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Sat May-02-09 06:07 PM
Original message

A Few Thoughts For My GLBT Friends on Shepherd vs. foxx.

Edited on Sat May-02-09 06:08 PM by MarianJack

I am a straight white man, 53 years old, with a Puerto Rican wife and an African American son. I am a Roman Catholic who has actually READ the Bible, unlike the most of the religious right bigots who dominate the republican party in 2009 (and for many years before that). I believe that we are taught to love one another. I believe that love is a precious and sacred gift in anybody's life. I don't care if it is for a parent, sibling, family member, child or life partner of the opposite sex or the same sex. I have no idea of exactly how you felt when a bigoted and ignorant member of congress hatefully disrespected the memory of a young gay murder victim in front of his MOTHER. Let me repeat what we already know again; IN FRONT OF HIS MOTHER!

I don't know if foxx knew that Mrs. Shepherd was present. If foxx is representative of the level of fanaticism that grips the republicans presently (and since republican leadership lets her in front of a microphone, there is no reason to believe she isn't), she didn't care. Most of the palin/huckabee/dobson/robertson republicans probably hold Mrs. Shepherd in contempt for continuing to love her son after he came out.

I can, however, express how I felt on one level. I can say how I felt as the husband of one ethnic person and the father of another.

I have witnessed and experienced both my wife and son being discriminated against. I remember my outrage when my wife and I were in a restaurant and were given rude and slow service by a waitress who had a sneer on her face as she looked at my wife's "Proud Puerto Rican" t-shirt. Her $0.05 tip and my conversation with her manager left no doubt about how I felt. I remember how my wife and I felt when a bigoted mother had obviously told her 2 kids to stop playing with my black son at a pool when he was 4. He'd committed the unforgivable sin of holding the little girl's hand as they ran through a sprinkler. I remember when a father went into a fury over my 6 year old black son helped his 3 year old daughter down from the high level of a McDonald's play gym and he took his child and stormed out without even letting her put her shoes on.

These were slights. I know the hurt and anger I felt over these. I can not know how it feels to have my child murdered for no other reason than who he is. I selfishly hope that I never do. I cannot imagine the agony that Matthew's parents must feel when they think how the last words their precious son heard in his life were slurs and words of hatred shouted from the mouths of the people who were taking his life. I selfishly hope that I'll never be able to.

Worst of all, I cannot fathom how it must feel to be a mother listening to an ignorant and bigoted woman who, by her age, is almost certainly a mother and grandmother, describe the facts of her son's murder as a "hoax". At best foxx is so stupid and steeped in her rightist fervor that she has no idea how contemptible her disrespect is. At worst she knew that Mrs. Shepherd was there and she knew the effect her words would have and she just didn't fucking care.

As a human being, I can only control my actions. As a father I can only be a loving and supportive parent to my son. Not long ago, it was posted here on DU that Vice-President Biden still hugs and kisses his 39 & 40 year old sons. I responded that I will be hugging and kissing my son when he's 99 & 1/2. My wife would tell you that I'm stubborn enough to stick around until then just to prove that point.

I will hug and kiss my son when he is 99 & 1/2 if he is straight, gay, bi or asexual. If the day comes when my son brings home a young lady and tells us that she is our to be our daughter-in-law, we will welcome her and love her with all our hearts. If the day comes when he brings home a young man and tells us that he is to be our son-in-law, we will welcome him and love him with all our hearts. As I said earlier, love is a gift to us all regardless of the form in which it comes.

I would really like to be able to say that I feel sorry for the virginia foxxes of this world for their ignorance and stupidity. I would really love to be able to say that I pity someone who is so stupid that they apologize for the "choice of words" when they disrespect a family (and national) tragedy. The reality of the situation is, however, that people like foxx are just too dangerous for pity and understanding. They are too dangerous for anything but the scorn in which thinking and caring people will hold them. They certainly have no business making legislative decisions that will effect people who are better than they. I certainly hope that the wave of blue that seems to be rising in North Carolina washes this woman's political career away. This, she has certainly earned.

PEACE!