Sharia on the Field: A Frivolous Fatwa?

[Kire]

N the name of God the merciful and benevolent:

1. Play soccer without four lines because this is a fabrication of the heretics' international rules that stipulate using them and delineating them before playing.

2. International terminology that heretics and polytheists use, like "foul," "penalty," "corner," "goal," "out" and others, should be abandoned and not said. Whoever says them should be punished, reprimanded and ejected from the game. He should be publicly told, "You have imitated the heretics and polytheists and this is forbidden."

3. Do not call "foul" and stop the game if someone falls and sprains a hand or foot or the ball touches his hand, and do not give a yellow or red card to whoever was responsible for the injury or tackle. Instead, it should be adjudicated according to Sharia rulings concerning broken bones and injuries. The injured player should exercise his Sharia rights according to the Koran and you must bear witness with him that so-and-so hurt him on purpose.

4. Do not follow the heretics, the Jews, the Christians and especially evil America regarding the number of players. Do not play with 11 people. Instead, add to this number or decrease it.

5. Play in your regular clothes or your pajamas or something like that, but not colored shorts and numbered T-shirts, because shorts and T-shirts are not Muslim clothing. Rather they are heretical and Western clothing, so beware of imitating their fashion.

6. If you have fulfilled these conditions and intend to play soccer, play to strengthen the body in order to better struggle in the way of God on high and to prepare the body for when it is called to jihad. Soccer is not for passing time or the thrill of so-called victory.

7. Do not set the time of play at 45 minutes, which is the official time of the Jews, Christians and all the heretical and atheist countries. This is the time used by teams that have strayed from the righteous path. You are obliged to distinguish yourself from the heretics and the corrupted and must not resemble them in anything.

6. Do not play in two halves. Rather play in one half or three halves in order to completely differentiate yourselves from the heretics, the polytheists, the corrupted and the disobedient.

9. If neither of you beats the other, or "wins" as it is called, and neither puts the leather between the posts, do not add extra time or penalties until someone wins. No, instead leave the field, because winning with overtime and penalty kicks is the pinnacle of imitating heretics and international rules.

10. If you play soccer, do not appoint someone to follow you called a "referee," since there is no need for him after doing away with international rules like "foul," "penalty," "corner" and others. His presence would be in imitation of the heretics, Jews and Christians and would follow international rules.

More: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/10/16/opinion/16porter.html?th&emc=th

[muriel_volestrangler]

1. Amazingly, this appears to be a true story

It's been kicking around on the internet, so to speak, since late August, and I haven't found a denial yet (including on Muslim forums, where the more-or-less complete reaction was either "are these guys nuts?" or "football is the least of our worries for how young people spend their time").

Since the whole thing reads like a parody of a fanatic who says "whatever you do, don't do it the same way as a non-believer", I still have a few doubts. Rule number 9 in particular looks as though it was written by someone who has only ever watched the World Cup, or similar, because football games do frequently end in draws, even infidel ones. I also think the very old-fashioned phrase "put the leather between the posts" (which hasn't been seriously used since before WW2, I'd think) shows that someone is having a laugh (though that could just be the translator, I suppose). I think the 'especially evil America' line is suspect too - the USA not being the first people that you think of when discussing soccer (sorry guys).

[pooky]

2. Why do they play the Heretics sport anyway !

The History of Soccer goes back 3000 years to the Chinese. It was played by the Greeks and Romans, and most Western Civilizations, way before Mohamed walked this earth. So it seems as if they should just "step away from the ball" and not worry about getting in trouble playing an infidels game.

Once again proof that all religious fanatics are loons! Their twisted ideas of what's right and wrong make it very hard to respect them.

Killing Innocent Buddhists in S. Thailand is another example of this ridiculous mindset. A monk and 2 children were killed yesterday and their temple burned. Not a religion of Peace in my book.

[HysteryDiagnosis]

3. If they really want to "stand out in a crowd" they should use a

square ball and get it over with.... heh heh heh...