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FourScore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:35 AM
Original message
NYT: Sarah Palin owes voters explanation for charging for rape kits
Wasilla Watch: Sarah Palin and the Rape Kits
By DOROTHY SAMUELS
NYT Editorial Observer
Published: September 25, 2008


Even in tough budget times, there are lines that cannot be crossed. So I was startled by this tidbit reported recently by The Associated Press: When Sarah Palin was mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, the small town began billing sexual-assault victims for the cost of rape kits and forensic exams.

Go to The Board » Ms. Palin owes voters an explanation. What was the thinking behind cutting the measly few thousand dollars needed to cover the yearly cost of swabs, specimen containers and medical tests? Whose dumb idea was it to make assault victims and their insurance companies pay instead? Unfortunately, her campaign is shielding the candidate from the press, so Americans may still be waiting for answers on Election Day.

The rape-kit controversy is a troubling matter. The insult to rape victims is obvious. So is the sexism inherent in singling them out to foot the bill for investigating their own case. And the main result of billing rape victims is to protect their attackers by discouraging women from reporting sexual assaults.

That’s why when Senator Joseph Biden, the Democratic vice-presidential nominee, drafted the 1994 Violence Against Women Act, he included provisions to make states ineligible for federal grant money if they charged rape victims for exams and the kits containing the medical supplies needed to conduct them. (Senator John McCain, Ms. Palin’s running mate, voted against Mr. Biden’s initiative, and his name has not been among the long list of co-sponsors each time the act has been renewed.)

That’s also why, when news of Wasilla’s practice of billing rape victims got around, Alaska’s State Legislature approved a bill in 2000 to stop it.

“We would never bill the victim of a burglary for fingerprinting and photographing the crime scene, or for the cost of gathering other evidence,” said Alaska’s then-governor, Tony Knowles. “Nor should we bill rape victims just because the crime scene happens to be their bodies.”

If Ms. Palin ever spoke out about the issue, one way or another, no record has surfaced. Her campaign would not answer questions about when she learned of the policy, strongly supported by the police chief: whether she saw it in the budget and if not, whether she learned of it before or after the State Legislature outlawed the practice...

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/26/opinion/26fri4.html?_r=1&ref=opinion&oref=slogin
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marshall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:37 AM
Response to Original message
1. They nêd to find a rape victim who actually paid for her own kit
Put up an ad comparable to the one by that woman who claims she's an "abortion survivor".
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:43 AM
Response to Reply #1
5. that abortion ad is the most offensive thing I've ever seen...
...rates right up there with that vicious Willie Horton ad. :puke:

And the woman they picked for that ad? She's the most hateful, bitter-looking person I've seen in a long time. If they wanted that ad to be more effective... never mind. Why give them any ideas? Let them stew in their own filth.
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:08 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. This is something I don't get.
As far as I am aware, it is true, that IS the woman who survived a saline abortion performed at 30 weeks gestation.

Attack the message, not the person, PLEASE. It's things like this that make people say that Obama's response ad, saying that it was a despicable lie that suggests that Obama was suggesting supporting infanticide or "expositio" as it was called in the Roman world -- leaving the babies to die -- was an attack against Gianna herself and not the fact that she lied in the ad when she spoke, that Obama was calling HER despicable.

The person they "picked" for that ad has been going around for more than a decade speaking her story. According to the person who saw her on Maury and is absolutely certain that Gianna was HER baby, the saline injection was done and she went into labor earlier than anticipated, she caught the baby herself, and a nurse called an ambulance to have the baby taken to a hospital. And records from California support that Gianna was born at 30 weeks gestation as a result of saline abortion, was placed into foster care immediately after birth, and her foster mother adopted her.

-----

I support a woman's right to choose. I am a FIRM supporter of it. I had an abortion myself, and while I regret the circumstances that led me to become pregnant, I do not regret the decision I made.

And yes, I still dream of what that child would have been like. And I know that if I had stayed on the medication I was on when I got pregnant, that child would likely have been horribly deformed, may not have lived in the womb, and if it had survived would have had a much more miserable life than just the cerebral palsy that Gianna has suffered from and overcome. I do not regret my decision -- I think my child will thank me, if I ever see it again, but I personally believe in reincarnation and that the child has found another body and another mother, if it's not waiting for me to get pregnant again.

------

If it were a lie, if this woman really hadn't been born during a saline abortion, YES, it would be despicable and vicious and offensive and horrible and filthy. But all documents and evidence show that this person has been honest about her origins.

So don't attack HER. Attack the lies she says about our candidate. Please.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:23 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. not worth it.
Edited on Fri Sep-26-08 11:42 AM by CitizenLeft
I deleted this because you pissed me off. I don't like being lectured to, really don't. Makes me go off every time.

However, I would like to keep the part about your personal feelings about abortion. I do truly sympathize... and that sentiment does not really explain my empathy.

Enough said.
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:31 AM
Response to Reply #8
11. I am well aware that you have the right to think, and say, that she looks hateful.
... but ...

Would you rather they had "picked" a person who hadn't actually survived an abortion, according to all evidence, who didn't look as "hateful", to pretend to be a person who had survived?

I hope not.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:34 AM
Response to Reply #11
12. again, not worth it.
Edited on Fri Sep-26-08 11:43 AM by CitizenLeft
see above.
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:52 AM
Response to Reply #12
16. I know you're not going to reply, but at least we're discussing the actual issue now.
Yes, it was a tasteless, tacky ad.

Just as the Willie Horton ad was.

What it seemed was that you believed, from your use of the word "picked", was that the story she was saying about her origins was a lie and that they had just chosen J Random Chick to get up there and say that she was aborted. Which is what I was trying to make sure you were aware of -- that it wasn't just J Random Chick. I would have been even more sickened if the had picked some very nice-looking (nice as in the opposite of hateful) actress to lie not only about our candidate but lie about the origins of the actress trying to garner sympathy.

She isn't immune to being a liar just because she happened to tell the (apparent) truth about her origins or because she apparently was aborted -- she lied flat out about our candidates policies and beliefs and the vote. That's what I think we ought to focus on. Even when our own candidate didn't dare to say ANYthing about Gianna, however, people immediately said that Obama was attacking her -- not attacking her lies, which is what was said.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEBDNGLl5TQ -- the title of the Youtube shows the person who posted it thinks Obama's ad was an attack directly on Gianna, not one on the ad itself. And he didn't even mention the girl, let alone say any opinion about her looks.

-----

While I do think that it would be an effective ad for us to find a woman who was willing to speak about her rape and being forced to buy her own rape kit, I would much rather it be a woman who came to a person and said "I want to speak about this" -- because there is another sickening aspect to the ad we are discussing.

Whoever engineered this ad asked this person to go up on TV and tell about what happened to her. In Gianna's case, from what I can see she has been a very vocal pro-life advocate, has done so with complete willingness, and so it may have very well been her choice to go up and lie about our candidate. She may have even approached people about doing the ad. But dragging someone up in front of people to garner sympathy is sickening in a way that even lying about our candidate isn't.

If a woman who has been affected by this horrible policy of Palin's sees the controversy and decides she wants to speak out about what happened to her, I will support it 100%, and donate a ton of money to getting it seen by everyone possible.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 12:13 PM
Response to Reply #16
18. I will answer...
...because your thoughtful responses deserve an answer. And I apologize for responding with a little more than annoyance. :)

Actually, I never questioned the truth, or otherwise, of her story, and it didn't really occur to me to consider that. I just said "picked" without putting any emphasis or importance on that word, it's just the one I used. If I had really thought about her, the speaker, I think it would be more effective if a softer, more pleasant looking subject had been "picked" ... because, considering the expression on her face, it was just too easy for me to see her protesting in front of a Planned Parenthood facility screaming at frightened women waving one of those horrible signs. YES, YES, "she lied flat out about our candidates policies and beliefs and the vote" ... THAT'S why the ad is disgusting.

As for abortion itself, I must confess that (1) I've never been pregnant, and (2) I'm not emotionally close enough to anyone who has had an abortion to have discussed it in any depth. So I admit, I am emotionally detached from the issue, while still completely in support of a woman's right to choose - and more, I admit I'm not that knowledgable about it, either, beyond the average person's awareness. Which is why I don't get into discussions about it, I know better. :) So, since I don't feel passionately about the issue, sometimes when I touch on the subject in even the most peripheral way, my words come out as, yes, detached, and probably incite people who DO feel passionately to respond. Again, this has happened to me before, and it perplexes me when people add all kinds of opinions onto my words when, honestly, I have no intention of getting deeply into the discussion, because I understand how deeply and entirely personal it is. Which is why I said... I'll never comment on the issue again. :)
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 12:31 PM
Response to Reply #18
19. It's okay.
I do feel passionately.

If I hadn't been date-raped, I wouldn't have had sperm anywhere near me. If the guy had the intelligence to have used a condom, or if my doctor had been willing to give me EC, I wouldn't have gotten knocked up. If the doctor who refused to give me EC hadn't also been the same one prescribing me medicine that was completely contraindicated in pregnancy, knowing that I couldn't take the Pill.... then I wouldn't have had the abortion, even though my financial situation was so horrible that a kid would have been better off being adopted out -- which is what I probably would have done, if I hadn't been on that med -- but it was MY CHOICE.

Just because the chick was nearly killed by her mom and lived to tell about it doesn't give her immunity to lie in support of people who would have MADE ME attempt to give birth to a child that would have suffered a lot more than she has.

Especially when those same idiots she is supporting refuse to help fund the foster-care system that she was born into, and don't help fund adoptions by people like her foster mom who adopted her, who from what I understand was the one that let her limp from podium to podium to make sure people give birth to every single child that is conceived, without advocating also to reform the foster care system and adoptions and ....

You see what I mean. :)

It may have been her choice to do it, and if it was, her adoptive mom was good to support her in doing it. And I've heard her speak -- she does focus a lot more on the love of Jesus than anything else in her speeches. She's said she's forgiven her birth mom for trying to kill her, saying she didn't know any better. Her birth mom contacted her adoptive mom and pretty much said "I'm the one who she might hate, I'm glad to see that she forgives me, if she wants to talk to me she can but it's her choice."

... you see the theme in a lot of what I say... choice.

THAT is what I support. I'm glad you do too, even if you haven't had to make that choice or supported anyone through making the choice.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 01:01 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. I am so sorry. Your story shames my ignorance...
Edited on Fri Sep-26-08 01:09 PM by CitizenLeft
:hug:

...and, again, it's why I shy away from it and am usually mum when the subject comes up. I have been very lucky, so far, not to have suffered some of life's most painful moments.

And, again, YES:

"Especially when those same idiots she is supporting refuse to help fund the foster-care system that she was born into, and don't help fund adoptions by people like her foster mom who adopted her..."


This is when I DO get upset, discussing this part of it. I have had few real discussions, but one that I did have was memorable. A man I once worked with, a wonderful person - an ordained minister, in fact - was immovable on his anti-abortion views... I labeled him "pro-life," and all that that entails. When we accidently ventured into the subject one day, he got so red-faced and angry with me that I thought he was going to explode. But not for the reasons I anticipated. I have always thought that some - some - of those who are pro-life are against supporting the child after birth because many babies born outside of marriage, and that wind up in homes, are African-American. Since I am African-American myself, this always incensed me, giving the whole issue a taint of racism, from my perspective, especially those fanatically against helping the children women DID give birth to. "Love the fetus, hate the child." Turns out - something I had no inkling of - he and his wife were in the process of adopting an African-American crack baby from the child's grandmother, who was, basically, extorting money from him, playing on his desperation to adopt the child. He had already given her thousands of dollars just to see the baby, and support his quality of life (the grandmother was very poor, and the mother was just not in the picture). So when I railed back at him about the lack of support for foster homes and programs for the very babies pro-life people profess to want to save, he nearly fainted with anger (though I did not bring up race, he was clearly not in that league). From that day on, I realized there is an opinion - and a story, a reason for that opinion - behind every person who is passionate on both sides of the issue. Actually, we got closer after that, and he kept me updated on his progress with the adoption, but the sad story didn't have a good ending. This couple couldn't afford the money the grandmother was trying to get out of them, so they had to let the baby go. A heartbreaking ending, just as your personal story is heart-rending. He and his wife were devastated.

My one experience with a person who had an abortion has probably influenced my detached attitude about it. We were both 17 - waaay too young for me, or her, to understand the million nuances and the million things her mind and body were going through - and she had gotten pregnant by my ex-boyfriend of mine. Okay then! Still, I was her only friend, so I kinda got her through it, in my ignorant teenaged way, by basically not saying anything controversial or judgemental or anything of importance. Hard to believe that we actually didn't really discuss "it" much, just went through the motions. I think I've carried that way of dealing with it to this day. Not helpful, I know, but... (side note: the next year, she did bring a baby to term by my ex-fiance - different guy... I know... :shrug:)

AND - my last confession! - having said all the things I said, I had no inkling of the history of the woman in the ad. Now that I know, it makes her more human, and therefore, yeah... harder to dislike. Don't know how I'll feel the next time that ad comes on. Maybe I'll listen more to what she says, probably get angrier at the distortions,... still, that knowledge offers a different perspective.

I'm glad you came back and responded. I wish you peace and nothing but the best, and keep fighting the good fight. :hi:
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 02:40 PM
Response to Reply #20
21. It's still very hard to support someone, and thanks for being there for your friend.
I'll also be honest -- "date-rape" is the only way I can describe what happened to me, but some might not see it that way.

I was in a really bad place in my life and went to see a very good friend, we had been lovers before, with too good of chemistry -- and he'd always been a bit pushy about things. I got drunk, he had my favorite alcohol there. Things got physical, I was REALLY drunk. I started saying no, he begged and kept on, finally I said "Well, okay, but not --"

When he heard "okay", he started to enter. It'd been a long time for him, and ... he had a bit of a hair trigger. When we'd been lovers, I'd been on the Pill, and he didn't know that the reason I lost 75 lbs since we had been together was coming off of the Pill.

When I finished with "WITHOUT A CONDOM!" in a very loud shriek, it ... well, I guess it scared it out of him.

I started crying, he started apologizing, offered to pay for the MAP.... I called my doctor, he refused saying it would be bad for my health and that I likely wouldn't get pregnant anyway. It was a Friday night. I got to Planned Parenthood on Monday and did take MAP then, but that was very late.

When I was obviously pregnant, I told that doc "Okay, you're the expert here... what chances does the kiddo have?" "Slim to none." "Okay, then I am going to have an abortion, and I want you to tell me the best place to go, I think you owe it to me to give me a good referral even if you don't like the idea of abortion."

He did, and I think he was just glad I didn't sue him -- I probably could have.

No protesters, in a doctor's office right next to the hospital... the idiot with the hair trigger took me, paid for it, and cried when he saw me come out of there -- I look awful after anesthesia. But he didn't argue with me at all when I said I couldn't have the kid, and wasn't crying at all the day of the procedure. I knew I had made the right choice. And he started being a lot more responsible with himself sexually after that.

--------

But when a friend of mine, during this while I was pregnant but before it was safe for me to have a surgical abortion (you have to wait a few weeks after your first missed period), asked me why I looked so down, and I told him.

"Whose is it?"

I told him. I didn't tell about the circumstances. He knew the guy, I didn't want to say he'd raped me (I had put myself in the situation knowing how he was, and I chose to drink....) and I didn't want to say the full story so I didn't embarrass the now very repentant prick.

"How could you be so stupid as to let yourself get pregnant??? And by HIM? You're doing the kid a favor, no kid with yours and his genes together should exist."

Woah. Hold up, MFer. I already knew I'd been stupid. I knew I was doing the kid a favor, but not because of its genes.

He never regretted anything more than those words, and he's just lucky I am not a physically violent person. My verbal violence is pretty damn bad.

Before the end of my tirade he was literally cowering.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 03:28 PM
Response to Reply #21
22. oh man...
Edited on Fri Sep-26-08 03:31 PM by CitizenLeft
I've always said, in response to, say, movies like "The Accused," or whenever the topic of date rape comes up, that I should be able to be in a bedroom, buck naked, on the bed, on my back, with the man about to enter me, but if I say no, NO means NO. Period. Unequivocal, non-negotiable, instantaneous NO. And alcohol doesn't matter. No means NO, drunk or not. Actually, ESPECIALLY drunk, carries even more weight, if possible, especially if the guy is not. I'm so sorry that happened to you. And how dare that "friend" be judgemental. That just enrages me thinking about it.

At least the guy was remorseful. Not a lot of comfort, but... there are so many jerks out there...

The girl who was my "friend," who I sorta helped through her abortion... honestly, she wasn't my friend, but she was so disliked that I felt sorry for her. She actually was the cause of the break-up of a different boyfriend (a third one, LOL), so I owed her nothing. But somehow, I forgave her all of that, and she sure needed a friend badly. She was so mixed up... had really messed up ideas of how a relationship should be, and at that tender age... lethal. She could've used some of your common sense, even if you had been drunk - a condom is just what she should've demanded, but even sober, it never occurred to her. But this was a long time ago. Wow, that kid would be... 20 years old now! I trust she's matured; she was such a smart girl in most other ways. Last time I saw her, she was in nursing school and getting herself together. I hope she did.

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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 04:57 PM
Response to Reply #22
23. I agree with you....
... it just wasn't something I would have prosecuted him for -- he was stupid and wrong, but I don't think he was trying to be criminal. And he learned the lesson that he needed to learn -- not using condoms is bad, and being pushy is bad. Better to learn that way than to learn in a lethal fashion. And he was drunk too, though not as much as me.

Nor would I go around telling people that he had "raped" me, even date-rape. To be honest, the way it happened was somewhat humorous -- I mean, shriek, bang. It was kind of an American Pie moment, looking back at this after seven years I can laugh at the comedic slant.

But it is weird. You hear about women who get pregnant and say they knew at the exact moment they had sex that they were pregnant, long before conception took place -- it takes a little bit for those guys to swim. I knew. Right then. No question in my mind, which is the reason I started crying hysterically -- it wasn't because I'd been raped, but because I knew that I was pregnant. I'd never, ever felt that way before, even when I'd had a pregnancy scare because of a late cycle.

I hope your friend got it together, too. I have a few friends like that.

After that, a friend of mine got pregnant, and aborted for health reasons and for the fact that she had made a mistake by sleeping with the guy. She already had two kids. She came to me to ask where I went, because she didn't want to deal with protesters. I took her, and she did wake up from the anesthesia crying, and ended up getting pregnant and keeping her daughter about six months later -- she'd gotten back together with the father of her kids, the birth had to be a C because her lower back was so hosed and it did get much worse from going to term. The place my doctor referred me to didn't really advertise, they were an OB clinic as well, and there were many patients there when we went in that were nearly due. But they were a good place -- clean, respectful, didn't make the procedure degrading, and the doctor really seemed to care. He was gentle during the pelvic, he told us both that we had time if we weren't sure....

While the experience was not good -- an abortion is not something that any person seeks out or enjoys -- I feel so grateful that I had the right to make my decision, that I wasn't accosted by people telling me I was a murderer, that I was safe, that the doctor wasn't rude or judgmental.... if anyone has to have an abortion, I hope they were able to have the kind I did.

When you took your friend, were protesters there? I support the right to protest, but I can't imagine how hard it is for a person to walk through a crowd of people holding pictures of aborted fetuses when you've already made a very painful decision.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Sep-27-08 01:16 AM
Response to Reply #23
25. no, no protestors...
Edited on Sat Sep-27-08 01:19 AM by CitizenLeft
...and I didn't go with her - her mother took her - but I saw her right afterward, after she got home. She wasn't depressed, but then again, she may have been just trying to put up a good front. If she ever cried, or verbally expressed any regrets, I didn't see it or hear them. The "other woman" thing going on between us - with my 3 ex's - put a real damper on intimacy.

When I look back on it, it was very brave of her to go through with it. We were in high school, she in her junior year, me in my senior. The relationship she broke up - me and the All-city star basketball player on the varsity - guaranteed that everybody knew what was going on, and she was ridiculed pretty badly. She just stuck up her chin and kept going, bluffing it out. After she blew that relationship up, she got pregnant with one of my ex's - that's the baby that was aborted. Maybe I admired her spunk, that's all I can say for befriending her. It took guts for her to go to school every day with that kind of derision going on, and she was a new transfer, too, not somebody like me who had established myself for 3 years. Wow. Talking about this brings it all back, and puts it all in perspective.

And yes... one of the things that annoys me is when pro-life folks imply that women with unwanted pregnancies WANT abortions, and that they have a flippant approach to it. Bullshit. This girl put on the bravado and acted like it was no big deal, but she didn't fool me, at least not in retrospect. It was underneath the surface, I just didn't want to tap it at that young age, and with someone who had kinda messed up my love-life, LOL! Still... she had guts. I wonder what the percentage is of women who, after an abortion, get pregnant again not long after, and that next time, they keep the baby...as if... as if to atone, in a way, or to have the chance again to make the choice. I'll bet it's higher than one would think.
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Sep-27-08 05:52 AM
Response to Reply #25
26. I'm glad she had family support, at least...
... even with the situation at school, where it sounds like very few people were as friendly as you were, or as forgiving.

Unfortunately there are a lot of people out there whose parents are such f-ed up individuals that they would force a girl to carry to term -- or put them through psychological or physical abuse as a result. I think the number of parents like that is much less than the number of teens who think their parents will beat the crap out of them, or ground them until they get out of high school.... many parents put up the "I've been good so you better be good too" front when in fact they may have had an abortion themselves, or had an unplanned pregnancy, or had another secret.... they didn't feel it was best to tell their kid about what happened to them so the kid could learn from the experience and also take care of the view that, in the words of South Park, "You think this only happens to girls in Brooklyn or Detroit, but no, it can't happen to me!"

My mom made sure both my sister and I knew that my sister wasn't planned, and that she had the option of abortion, even if it wasn't legal. The guy offered to pay for her to go where it was legal and safe, and that was a LOT of money back in 1970. She made it clear that my sister was here not because of a belief that abortion was the worst sin imaginable, but because she decided, for herself, that she wanted to keep and raise her baby (and that's a lot better of a way to tell a girl who you're telling might have been aborted about it -- "I may not have planned you, but once you were in the picture, I kept and treasured you out of love, I wanted you the moment I knew you were coming even if you weren't planned, and I chose to be your Mom freely and without reservation.") She made sure we knew that we would be supported no matter what we chose, and that she would love us either way. (She also made it clear that she would not be upset at us if we decided we liked girls more than, instead of, or along with guys -- that she thought from hearing us talk that we thought guys were cool, but that she saw absolutely nothing wrong with same-sex relationships, she just wanted whoever we chose to be chosen out of love and caring -- and I had an "uncle and uncle" when I was growing up.)

Since my Dad was diagnosed with HIV when I was 12, I already knew the lessons of STDs.

But even when I was faced with the choice as an adult, I didn't tell Mom about it. She was going through some really bad times of her own -- she was coping with mental illness and had already been under the delusion that I had already had an abortion a year before. Another slightly comedic aspect to what happened to me -- I'd forgotten to shut my cell phone off when I went into the room for the procedure. The nurse tapped the vein, shot me up with the Demerol and Versed... and the phone rang.

It was Mom.

I wasn't in stirrups yet, so I said "Hand it to me." "Mom? I'm asleep." <click>

I then turned the phone off, handed it to them, and said "Sorry about that, continue...." and that's the last thing I remember.

When I told my father about it -- I actually told him before I told Mom -- he said "I wish you had talked to me first... I would have found some way to make sure you could have the baby, and I would have helped you raise my grandchild." Then I explained the medical situation, and he said "Oh... then I think you did the right thing, and you're a very strong girl, just like I knew you were, but you better figure out a way to make me a grandpa before I die." Gee thanks Dad, but at least he was supportive, and his desire for a grandchild was understandable. He was an only child and has no other family except me.

People talk about Bristol Palin making the "brave choice". ANY choice you make yourself in that situation is brave, because no matter what choice you make, it's hard. If you choose to keep your baby, there are all sorts of consequences. If you choose adoption, you wonder the rest of your life about that part of you out there in the world, being afraid that they hate you or think you didn't love them. If you choose what I chose, you wonder too... and are called a murderer.

Our job as people who are around those faced with the choice is to support them in whatever choice they make, make sure they know that you will be there for them through all the difficulties, and make sure they have no pressure put on them -- economic, emotional, or moral -- that is unavoidable. And hope that we never have to be there, or be there again.
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CitizenLeft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Sep-27-08 08:42 AM
Response to Reply #26
27. what you said is so true:
Our job as people who are around those faced with the choice is to support them in whatever choice they make, make sure they know that you will be there for them through all the difficulties, and make sure they have no pressure put on them -- economic, emotional, or moral -- that is unavoidable. And hope that we never have to be there, or be there again.


My Mom is gone, now, but I'm sure she would've supported me had I ever gotten pregnant. I'm sorry that I didn't give her any grandchildren.

Sounds like your Dad is doing well living with HIV. I hope that continues; God, another thing for you to have to adjust to and get through and worry about. You are one strong person, my friend. :)
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:46 AM
Response to Reply #1
6. As far as I know, Gianna Jessen actually did survive an abortion.
But ...

She was far enough along that nowadays she would have either not been allowed to be aborted, or would have been aborted via hysterotomy or induction instead of saline. In other words, she was past viability and all efforts would have been made to have done a procedure that would have preserved her life if her mother had decided to abort -- or was forced to for health reasons.

From what I understand, the woman who aborted her has admitted that she was the birth mother in this situation.

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npincus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:38 AM
Response to Original message
2. a DUer posted yesterday on this subject, that
the rape kits contained a "morning after" pill which Palin equates w/abortion, and that was what was behind it. Don't know what backed that up, but it has a ring of truth to it.
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FourScore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:40 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. It's only speculation.
That idea has been floating around for a couple of weeks now. Sounds plausible to me.
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Lucy Goosey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:51 AM
Response to Reply #2
15. I think that's a big part of the story.
This post at Kos pulls some of the evidence together nicely.

Note that when a Palin spokesperson responded, she said the governor "does not believe, nor has she ever believed, that rape victims should have to pay for an evidence-gathering test." She doesn't use the term "rape kit" like everyone else, presumably because the rape kits include emergency contraception. (evidence that Wasill rape kits included EC at Kos post.)

Also note this right wingnut World Net Daily defence of the policy, which certainly seems to think that the EC is the issue: Palin attacked over rape-kit controversy, Alaska law forces taxpayers to fund 'emergency contraception'

I really think that this is the main issue in the rape kit story. There are wingnuts who really, literally believe that emergency contraception = murder.

Or am I getting a little "tinfoil-hat" here?
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moriah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 12:04 PM
Response to Reply #2
17. That's very interesting, but "rape kit" is not a thing handed to a woman.
If it was that along with the policy of paying for the actual DNA testing in the forensic investigation, it was also a policy to pay for EC, she could have easily said "We won't pay for the EC, but we will pay for the DNA testing". They should be billed separately, as they are two very separate issues.

As I was discussing with a coworker, who was defending the policy of having women pay for the forensic investigation with the line "a person who is mugged doesn't get their ER visit paid for..."

A woman can go to the ER for treatment after rape and not submit to a "rape kit" -- they can get their lacerations or physical injuries treated, get EC, get the pill, get STD testing, etc. That is all medical treatment. An exam is part of that, but the exam does not include gathering forensic evidence.

If the woman chooses to have forensic evidence gathered, then part of the exam is then a pelvic with evidence-gathering.

The major cost is not the exam itself, but having the DNA tested -- and if any person is charging $1200 just for the doctor to do a pelvic, my ex-husband really did pick the line of work he chose well (he's an OBGYN).

The additional cost of the pelvic and the materials used for forensic evidence gathering, and the testing of the evidence, should be covered by the state, and paid for either by taxpayer dollars or out of victim's compensation funds.

Covering anything else is a totally separate issue.
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Miss Chybil Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 10:38 AM
Response to Original message
3. This is exactly why they shield her from the press. She can't handle these questions. nt
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uponit7771 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
9. "in what respect charlie"
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Rosa Luxemburg Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
10. At last, the MSM is running this
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renate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:35 AM
Response to Original message
13. wow... so Biden's act specifically said women COULDN'T be charged
and (assuming that Alaska got federal grant money) Palin chose to violate the law?

How awesome is it that the guy who sponsored the bill is going to get to confront her on this? I am looking forward to the VP debate more and more.
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LiberadorHugo Donating Member (557 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 11:36 AM
Response to Original message
14. I told a female friend of my from SW Ontario this story...
She's been a victim of abuse and sex crimes, and her reaction (against Palin) was so offensive that I will not post it here.
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mitchum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-26-08 05:00 PM
Response to Original message
24. Palin seems to be oddly sympathetic to rapists
I wonder why...
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