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Edited on Mon Apr-02-07 08:45 PM by NanceGreggs
Thankful for Small Favors
By Nancy Greggs
Hey, what can I say? It’s the way my mother raised me. Always thank someone who’s done you a good turn, even if it’s someone you don’t necessarily like.
It is in that spirit that I feel compelled to thank the Republicans for all they’re doing for we Democrats in achieving our goal of capturing the White House in ’08, along with an even stronger majority in the House and Senate.
I know, I know – it’s easy to say that we were a shoe-in without their assistance in any event. But I don’t think the GOP’s current efforts to help our cause should go overlooked, or unappreciated.
The administration’s stonewalling on Attorney-Gate is pretty much akin to handing the Dems the White House on a silver platter. I thank them all for showing the American people just how quick they are to lie, to change their stories literally from one minute to the next, and then refuse to go on the record, under oath, when they’ve been caught in their own tangled web of deceit. Well done.
Ann Coulter, the Lord be praised, is still out there hawking her hate-strewn, mis-information filled books to the hopelessly illiterate – which puts the readers and the fact-seekers squarely in the Democratic column. And O’Reilly and the gang continue to follow suit, keeping the brain-dead off the streets and glued to their couches, where they can’t do too much harm.
Rudy "I Was The Only Guy in NYC on 9-11" Giuliani picked up the Thirty Pieces of Silver award a few days ago, again denying that he knew about Kerik, and warns the press to keep their mouths shut about his wife – you know, the one he thinks should sit in on Cabinet meetings when he’s president. The Fundies are just lovin’ the fact that when he refers to his wife, they’re not exactly sure which one he’s talking about – but that, as they say, is a whole ‘nother story.
I have to admit I’m pretty disappointed by the fact that Rush hasn’t contributed to our cause by making fun of the disease-afflicted of late – but, hey, it’s only Monday! I have no doubt he’ll weigh-in with some stunt that will send people Rushing to the Democrats’ side before the week is out.
On the other hand, you can’t say that Cheney isn’t doing his bit to ensure a Democratic sweep in the next election. Dead-Eye Dick’s tired old shtick about how the Democrats’ plans for getting out of Iraq emboldens the enemy (along with pleasing the majority of the American people) resulted in a lot of empty seats at his latest fundraiser. Thanks, Uncle Dick – we knew you’d come through when we needed you (except for those five deferments, which we’ll just pretend never happened.)
And I’d be remiss if I didn’t give a big tip o’ the hat to rapper Karl Rove’s recent performance! There’s nothing like a pasty, fat old white man doing his thang to send the younger generation of voters flying into the arms of the party that wants to reduce the cost of a college education and student loans rather than hang with the gang that still think whoopee cushions and plastic dog crap are the height of hilarity.
But the true Godsend was Senator John McCain’s performance over the past weekend. Let’s face it, folks. A man who really wanted to be president wouldn’t have gone so far out of his way (like, all the way to Iraq!) to confirm what a clueless idiot he is.
He could have backed off his original assertion about how safe it is to stroll around Baghdad, and simply chalked the statement up to undue exaggeration to make a point. But half-measures are not our Johnny Boy’s style. Instead he hauled his hiene around an Iraqi marketplace – accompanied by a small army, complete with air cover, spittin’ distance from the Green Zone – and made a damned fool of himself for all to see. Kudos to Senator McCain for proving beyond all doubt that when it comes to choosing our next Commander-in-Chief, he is definitely not the guy!
(Honorable mention should also go to Lindsay Graham in a brilliant supporting role as the Dumb-ass Sidekick, whose delivery of the line, “Hey, I got five rugs for five bucks!” captured the essence of the self-absorbed Republican to a fair-thee-well.)
As is always the case in situations like this, I just know I’m forgetting a lot of the little people out there who, through their dishonesty, displays of corruption, and outright stupidity are contributing to an overwhelming Democratic success in 2008. Please be assured that while I might not yet know your names and your deeds, my gratitude knows no bounds.
But I’m sure we’ll get to meet more and more of you as the investigations continue, subpoenas are issued, and your testimony is heard – or not, as you invoke your fifth amendment rights instead.
Thanks for everything, GOP! We promise not to forget you and all you’ve done for the country – ever.
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