The wit and wisdom of Molly Ivins.

[SteppingRazor]

I figured the best thing I could do would be to just offer some choice cuts of classic Ivins. So here you go.

"Good thing we've still got politics in Texas — finest form of free entertainment ever invented."

"In Texas, we do not hold high expectations for the governor's office; it's mostly been occupied by crooks, dorks and the comatose."

"Being slightly paranoid is like being slightly pregnant - it tends to get worse."

"I dearly love the state of Texas, but I consider that a harmless perversion on my part, and discuss it only with consenting adults."

"During a recent panel on the numerous failures of American journalism, I proposed that almost all stories about government should begin: 'Look out! They're about to smack you around again!' "

"I believe in practicing prudence at least once every two or three years."

"Any nation that can survive what we have lately in the way of government, is on the high road to permanent glory."

"It's hard to argue against cynics - they always sound smarter than optimists because they have so much evidence on their side."

"The thing about democracy, beloveds, is that it is not neat, orderly, or quiet. It requires a certain relish for confusion."

"I am not anti-gun. I'm pro-knife. Consider the merits of the knife. In the first place, you have to catch up with someone in order to stab him. A general substitution of knives for guns would promote physical fitness. We'd turn into a whole nation of great runners. Plus, knives don't ricochet. And people are seldom killed while cleaning their knives."

"The United States of America is still run by its citizens. The government works for us. Rank imperialism and warmongering are not American traditions or values. We do not need to dominate the world. We want and need to work with other nations. We want to find solutions other than killing people. Not in our name, not with our money, not with our children's blood."

"There's far too much unthinking respect given to authority."

"Politics is not a picture on a wall or a television sitcom that you can decide you don't much care for."

Those last two should be shoved into the brains of everyone in America. You can't ignore politics. If you don't play, you lose. And when you do play, don't think that your playing pieces are better than you. Because no matter how badly you want to be the car in Monopoly, it's still your car.

http://blogs.southflorida.com/citylink_dansweeney/2007/02/molly_ivins_aug_31_1944jan_31.html