|
The influenza epidemic of 1918-19 was nothing to it. GOPpie talking points are going paws-up faster than I can keep track -- so fast, in fact, that even their own architects can't keep up with it. They hover around, confused, poking them with their trunks, waiting for the ol' tried-and-true cliche to jump up and energize "the base," and save their pachydermal heinies in time for 11/7.
Unable to keep track of which talking points have keeled over, the GOPpie spinmeisters are panicking, flinging them all out in turn, emptying their pockets and scraping up the lint and tossing that, too. It's pathetic, and creepy, and sort of mesmerizing to watch, like a train wreck in slow-motion.
In sheer mercy, I am moved to offer a Mortality Bill:
"The Scary Gays are going to eat your children."
DEAD. And rapidly decomposing. Not that the backwash-er-base hasn't suddenly abandoned homophobia, but bringing up "gay" and "kids" in the same sentence right now doesn't exactly make anyone think of famous Democrats, y'know?
"The Scary Gays are going to End Marriage As We Know It."
In intensive care, on the "critical" list. Still breathing, but by and large a paper tiger. There have been gays getting married in Massachusetts and San Francisco for a couple of years now, and no detectable diminution in the number and viability of heterosexual marriages in either place. A decent segment of GOPpie voters, who are only mildly homophobic and still have three or more functioning brain cells to rub together, are starting to do the math on this one and think "huh?" Another sizable segment remains quite homophobic but has relegated "the homosexual agenda" to a way low place on their List of Worries.
"Girly Democrats can't handle national security!"
Sorry, guys. DEAD. The first thing that goes through the mind of a growing majority of soon-to-be-ex-GOPpie voter is "Oh, yeah? And you idiots have been doing such a great job? Geddoudahere!"
"Democrats will mandate the wholesale slaughter of innocent fetuses!"
Dead, but a very pretty corpse. The hard-core blastocyst-worshippers are more pissed off at you guys for not executing every abortion doctor and chaining women in the kitchen without their shoes than they are scared of the coming Great Embryo Genocide. It doesn't help that word is starting to get out that there were way fewer abortions under Democratic administrations. A few nostalgic clinic-protest groupies are hovering hopefully around the corpse, but it ain't gonna get up and walk any time soon.
"Democrats will legalize euthanasia and let doctors and nurses kill people on life support!"
The tombstone is labeled "Terry Schaivo."
"Democrats will raise your taxes!"
On life support, fighting gallantly, but weakening. A good number of middle-class GOPpie voters have started to notice that all those GOPpie "tax cuts" haven't done much to keep disposable income in their pockets. A few of the brightest ones have even noticed who REALLY benefits from GOPpie's oh-so-tender concern about tax rates. And the ones smart enough to handle basic arithmetic are starting to worry more about the size of the massive, ballooning federal debt than whether a "death tax" will deprive millionaires' kids of their right to inherit every last cent of Mumsie and Daddums' swag.
"Democrats will deprive you of your right to drive huge gas-guzzlers in the name of some wacko "junk science" about global warming!"
DEAD. Anyone whose tried to keep gas in their Lincoln Inseminator this past year will just look at you like "You've GOT to be kidding me, right?"
"Democrats will take your guns away!"
Call the crash cart. Too many Democrats are gun-sports participants, collectors, etc., for this one to get much traction unless/until a Democratic Congress starts prioritizing the Brady Bill over a few trivial matters like cleaning up the mess in Iraq, getting the federal debt under control, restoring habeas corpus, etc. Ain't gonna happen soon, don't get your hopes up.
"Democrats hate America/don't support the troops/want to cut and run."
Dead, cremated, ashes scattered to the four winds. Ask any veteran who's discovering just how generous a GOPpie-controlled government is with the men and women who put their lives on the line for us.
"Democrats are the party of Big Government!"
Oh, man... SOOOOOooo dead. Really. Try uttering this one with a straight face. Better not be standing in front of any "Department of Homeland Security" buildings, vehicles, or facilities when you try it.
"Liberal, liberal, LIBERAL! They're LIBERALS, I tell you!! LIBERALS!!!"
Respiration dropping, pulse erratic. In spite of thirty years and billions of dollars poured into a massive media/think tank campaign to make Americans equate "liberal" with "evil undead pedophile," this one is losing traction faster than a Yugo on an icy slope. Only the hardcore backwash still wholeheartedly buys the 'liberal = satanic boogeymen' conflation. I won't say that long, expensive, dedicated propaganda campaign hasn't had an effect, but "liberal" just isn't as scary as it used to be. Especially when used by some of the frootloops who stridently insist that they represent "conservative values."
"WE share your values! They don't!"
DEAD, my friends. Implying that the voters "share the values" of the party of Abramoff, DeLay, Foley et al is to insult those same voters. Faced with a choice between lying about a blowjob and lying about whether a Congresscritter is sexually preying on teens committed to the care of the Congress, voters are starting to wonder whether they should even be using "values" as a criteria in deciding whether a candidate will do their job well once elected. I know, the horror of it, the horror!
Well, there ya go. That's just a sample of most noticeable bodies; I'm sure other DUers can add to the list. Now that you guys know, perhaps you can stop trying to pour electrical current through the corpses in the hope of reanimating them, and come up with some NEW talking points for a change.
We're ready. To quote one of yours, "Bring it on!"
provocatively,
Bright
|
Printer-friendly format
Email this thread to a friend
Bookmark this thread
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
