I am in a lot of pain tonight. Could any of my DU family help me

[cboy4]

think of some productive ways to fight back and begin to change people's ways of thinking about this subject?

I couldn't concentrate at all at work today thinking about this story.

I posted a bitter comment last night about how hopeless I feel about the way the government treats gay people in the military, and only two people responded. :(

I came across too angry. It's no wonder nobody responded and why nobody cares.

I am so unspeakably sad about this person (Bleu), who is a linguist in Arabic. He was thrown in the garbage because he is gay.

I try to act rough and tough a lot of times responding to anti-gay bigotry to help cope with and mask my despair.

But the truth is I'm just worn out. :cry:

They're kicking one person after the next out of the service....placing bigotry above national security.

I know there are so, so many problems in the world right now that are way more important than this..

However, this is a tragic situation that can be fixed so much easier than peace.

We're firing soldiers because they're gay. They're gay and that's good enough to destroy them.

How can this be and how can we let this happen? It just can't be 2006.

I don't know what to do. I'm going to call my senators (Boxer and Feinstein) on Monday.

I also want to organize some events but I don't know what else.

Can you guys help me with some ideas? Please?

I feel so sick to my stomach that I don't want to eat. I don't feel like anyone cares.

At least I can understand why some people are opposed to gay marriage.

This I cannot understand. It's not fair. We didn't choose to be this way. How can you fire a valuable linguist like this?

Please, if anyone who has experience dealing with discriminatory issues such as this, and has any ideas on how I can begin trying to change this policy, could you help me?

I don't know this young man who was recently kicked out, but I am devastated for him.

Thank you so much for listening and caring.

As angry as I can be at time, you are my family. :hug:
=============================================================


Army dismisses gay Arabic linguist

A decorated sergeant and Arabic language specialist was dismissed from the U.S. Army under the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, though he says he never told his superiors he was gay and his accuser was never identified.

Bleu Copas, 30, told The Associated Press he is gay, but said he was "outed" by a stream of anonymous e-mails to his superiors in the 82nd Airborne Division at Fort Bragg, N.C.

"I knew the policy going in," Copas said in an interview on the campus of East Tennessee State University, where he is pursuing a master's degree in counseling and working as a student adviser. "I knew it was going to be difficult."

An eight-month Army investigation culminated in Copas' honorable discharge on Jan. 30 — less than four years after he enlisted, he said, out of a post-Sept. 11 sense of duty to his country.


The "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, established in 1993, prohibits the military from inquiring about the sex lives of service members, but requires discharges of those who openly acknowledge being gay.

The policy is becoming "a very effective weapon of vengeance in the armed forces" said Steve Ralls, a spokesman for the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, a Washington-based watchdog organization that counseled Copas and is working to repeal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

Copas said he was never open about his sexuality in the military and suspects his accuser was someone he mistakenly befriended and apparently slighted.

More than 11,000 service members have been dismissed under the policy, including 726 last year — an 11 percent jump from 2004 and the first increase since 2001.

That's less than a half-percent of the more than 2 million soldiers, sailors and Marines dismissed for all reasons since 1993, according to the General Accountability Office.

But the GAO also noted that nearly 800 dismissed gay or lesbian service members had critical abilities, including 300 with important language skills. Fifty-five were proficient in Arabic, including Copas, a graduate of the Defense Language Institute in California

[MaggieSwanson]

1. cboy4, don't despair.

It's always darkest before the dawn, right?

Bigotry is one of the ugliest things about the human race, and I long for the day when it is erased. Perhaps that day will come sooner than we think.

This type of discrimination is a travesty.

I wish I could offer you more in terms of ideas, but all I have tonight is empathy and positive thoughts headed your way.

:hug:

Maggie

[longship]

2. HeadOn - Apply Directly...

Nevermind.

I feel your pain, too.

Peace to you, my friend. Peace.

[patrice]

3. It is troubling that the military would prefer persons of lesser skill

to people with greater skills who are Gay. Doesn't that affect the mission? Aren't more injured? Don't more military members die? Because the best people for the job aren't on the job, simply because they are Gay.

[bperci108]

4. I don't know how much this will help...

...but attitudes are changing. Even out here in the Red-state Sticks, people are beginning to realize that LGBT people are precisely just that: people.

I saw a poll that questioned the respondents view of same-sex marriage. The age breakdown was cause for hope; even if the minds and hearts of the entrenched anti-LGBT bigots aren't opened, those of their children are nonetheless.

It's not right and it's not fair that we may have to wait them out, but one way or another, LGBT folks are going mainstream.



Don't let it get you down; keep your spirits up. :hug:

[papau]

5. I suspect we all care - but afraid I have no solution given this USSC

electing Dems is hopefully the solution.

Fear of gays does a long way back - not that that fact helps, I realize.

But back in the 50's and 60's the CIA/NSA/Pentagon would wire one up to a lie dector, put a few shrinks in the room, and have at for a several hours with a major major focus on your sex life, and indeed if you said you were not gay and despite the machine saying you told the truth, there would be a great deal of time spent discussing possible gay sexual activity - in very graphic detail.

The gov leaders for some reason seem to fear gays.

In any case Mr. Copas has a skill he can sell in the private sector.

In the mean time you might drop Barney Frank - my congressman who is both gay and fantastic with words - a line and see what he suggests.

[WildEyedLiberal]

6. Maybe send this story to congresspeople on the Armed services committee?

And point out how this bigoted policy is hurting our national security interests. Also could you send it to gay news sources like the Advocate or something and suggest they write an article or start a campaign against the policy?

My advice is probably crap, but at least I can offer moral support. Hang in there. :hug:

[uppityperson]

19. WEL, your sigline picture makes me sad. cboy4, I don't know what to say

Be sad, tired, worn out. It is hard and times are sad and scary and heartbreaking. I wish I had advice but I do not. You are not alone, but many feel that way. Hugs to you.

WEL, I do like that picture of Kerry, thank you for keeping it as your sig picture.

[WildEyedLiberal]

25. Thanks - it's one of my favorites

Looking at that pic makes me feel hopeful - if Kerry can still be out there fighting after everything he went through, it gives me inspiration to get up, dust myself off, and keep fighting the good fight, even when everything seems bleak.

[Xeric]

7. Just remember cboy

It's always two steps forward, one step back.
I know the news hasn't been great lately.
The bigots have no rationality, no logic and no future. We will win in the end.

[Son Of Spy]

8. I will respond.

Older and hetero tho I may be, it is still wrong... no criminal(!) to waste
talent in this manner. I cannot think of any more vital patriotic ability than
to translate Arabic. They're f*ckling idiots! (thnx to Lewis Black)

The "don't ask don't tell " policy is bullshit...but typical of this gay-bashing
culture we live in.

Didn't you love the story of Ian McKellan being made an honorary officer
an out-of-the-closet gay star in the US Military. Perrfect!

Smile.

Always the backwards frightened clueless fight against the light, against
the harmless but unknown devils conjured by the fearmongers!

Always in the end truth and reason move us closer to becoming a single golden
(the result of mixing the races) healthy loving human family. A family is
made up two or more people who love each other. If there are two adults, they
should be able to marry no matter what the mix is.

Given time...NOTHING CAN PREVENT IT!

Believe!

...and protest to hasten its coming.

Best Regards,

Son Of Spy
Stepfather of a golden child

[DeepModem Mom]

9. Hi, cboy4. It's very frustrating, as an individual...

trying to promote change. Since I'm a writing- and word-person, I'd just offer one (not very clever or original) suggestion of writing "letters to the editor" to newspapers.

Also, about posts -- I post a lot here, mainly newspaper articles, and as I post at night in the West, a lot of people in the Eastern time zones are already asleep. This affects the number of responses, I know from experience, for sure. Also, I'm often a little disappointed when I post something eye-catching, or scandalous, or something that offers DUers a chance to vent at one of their favorite villains, and get lots of responses -- and then post something serious and get only one or two. I keep posting serious posts anyway, because they need to be posted, and because they are read, even if not responded to.

The news story above, I think, got a lot of response when it was posted in LBN, so I think many are aware of this. I wish something could be done about this case, and those of gay servicemen. Is there a gay veterans group, by any chance?

[pnwmom]

10. For what it's worth, the Bushies are only about 1/3 of the population.

And when I look at the distance we've come in the last twenty-five years (when my father came out) -- and compare it to today, I am still encouraged. There will always be some idiots out there, but looking at attitudes of the younger generation, I have a lot of hope.

[Bjornsdotter]

11. I'm guilty

I did see your post yesterday and didn't respond; not because I don't care...I do, but like you I am just sick that a person's worth is being judged on whether they are gay or straight.

I just don't understand why so many people are hostile to the gay community, it make no sense.. Believe me I have thought about it for years.

There will always be people who condemn others for no good reason, I try to avoid these types but it is not always possible.

I have a son who is not quite sure of his sexuality, he thinks he might be bi-sexual. He talked to me when he was 15 about this and we have had many conversations since then. We have talked about the reactions of people if/when they find out and the prejudice he will encounter. I wish I had the solution to the animosity.

All we can do as a society is to stand together and keep fighting, until we all have the same rights.

If you come up with some ideas, PM me...I'd be happy to help.

You're right we are your family at DU and if you need us, let us know.

Cheers :hug:

[melnjones]

12. Your post breaks my heart...

I'm not going to go into all the details of why it breaks my heart, but please remember that even with all the people out there against you, there are still a good number standing behind you and beside you and even willing to duck into battle ahead of you to try to prepare the way. I'm a straight single female, studying to be a minister in a fairly conservative Christian church movement. Homosexuality is a touchy subject for me, and because I look at it from such a liberal standpoint I get a lot of crap from those around me who find out. A lot of very personal, mean attacks and assumptions...and I do sometimes fear for my job security in the future in this movement. At the same time, someone has to be the squeaky wheel, and I think I'm one of those persons. Because I'm not gay, I can more easily go into settings with such a conservative mindset and almost be taken seriously. I'm not going to go into all the crap I've been put through (since age 12, for crying out loud) for being accepting of my gay brothers and sisters, but it has been a lot and it has been unbelievably hurtful. I don't say this to brag, but I say it because I want you to know that even outside the gay community, you are not alone. Others really are fighting for you and with you, even when it results in personal loss, because you are important. My gay friends are too important for me to keep silent. If you need to vent anytime, pm me. You're not alone :pals:

[mnhtnbb]

13. People do care. Changing attitudes takes time--and what seems

so obvious to a lot of us at DU seems incomprehensible to people who've been taught to hate someone different than themselves.

There are a lot of bigots in this country, and the military has codified
bigotry with the don't ask, don't tell policy. The policy is wrong and
in time it will change. In time, there will be civil unions--maybe not marriage--but civil unions available in more and more states. Affording gay couples the right to marry doesn't threaten my marriage, either. The people who want to claim marriage is intended for the protection of children and family need to wake up and realize not only are many younger couples childless by choice, but are couples past child-bearing age to be prevented from marrying?

We do care. I care not only in theory, but on a personal level, too, since I have a gay son. He's almost 20 and we think that he's already experienced discrimination in the workplace when he was laid off after a year on his first job. There was no rhyme or reason to why he was chosen from the staff to be laid off--it wasn't done by seniority--but when his store was required to cut one employee, he was the one cut. We're in NC-- a so-called 'right to work' state--but what that really means is a right to be fired for no cause.

Some day all this will change. Have hope. We do care.

[niyad]

14. choy4, please do not give in to despair--I know it looks pretty dismal

and hopeless some days, but, in the words of that rather bastardized latin phrase "illegitimati non carburundum" or, "don't let the bastards grind you down"

alas, the kind of stupidity that allows the military to get rid of one of its few arabic-speaking linguists was also used at state (I believe) just recently to get rid of their 4 arab-speaking linguists, who were also gay. it is almost beyond belief, isn't it?

letters to editors may help, writing your senators and every member of the armed services committee may help a bit. other than that, at this moment, I have no other truly helpful ideas (but it is getting late) tomorrow I am going to talk to several of my politically-savvy gay friends, and see if they can offer any brilliant ideas.


do know, however, that you are not alone, that there are many who are also upset and wanting to do what they can to help. and look at the progress that has been made--even 10 years ago, for example, gay marriage was not even being discussed in the mainstream--now we have at least one state that recognizes it, others that recognize civil unions--and the fight is on. canada and at least one EU country recognize gay marriage.

and the wonderful people here at DU--at least the ones who are awake-- will have good ideas for you, and you know that we all do care.

[unkachuck]

15. on a large billboard....

....on a busy interstate, put:

"Dear Conservative,

If how you use your male-member disqualifies you from important work, should George Bush or his father have become President?

Support fair treatment for all. Support an end to discriminatory 'Don't Ask-Don't Tell' policy."

[FrenchieCat]

16. Chin Up! don't let them beat you down....cause that is what they want

to do.

Change is fought one day at a time, and happens one step at a time (even if we seem to be going backwards at time).....but remember that it will take each and everyone one of us to stay tenacious! Don't give "them" the satisfaction in achieving their goal, and realize that the good fight is always the hardest.

We will not see any changes until we change this administration and this congress....

Hang on....even if it's by the tips of your nails!

[grasswire]

17. DU used to have a view page counter...

...so that anyone could see how many views a page got and also how many posts a thread got. It was just amazing how many views a thread might get that only had a few posts.

And so I think your act of posting the thread probably made more of an impact than you might sense. Many people saw it. But there's just so very much wrong; so many threads that describe so many horrors and wrongs that people don't always know what to say anymore.

Be strong. We need you.

[niyad]

18. just wanted to add--although I live in a virulently fundie city (focus and

new life church are right up the road from me--ugghhh) when that piece of filth phelps and his group came to town to protest a proposed gay-straight alliance club at one high school--1200+ citizens filled the park and streets around that school--telling him his brand of bigotry and hatred was not welcome here. and this was at 7 in the morning, and this is, sadly, the home of amendment 2, so you can see it was a pretty big deal. for once, I was actually proud of this community, rather than being ashamed of it.

there is hope, cboy, there is always hope.

[Cobalt-60]

20. Contract!

The oppressors seldom fail to live down to my expectations.
This can be turned around. This guy has a useful skill.
The military desperately needs Arabic linguists, in and out of uniform.
Or how about a civilian translator position that pays more and lacks the distinction of being ill paid property of the State?
The CIA, State Department and FBI come to mind. And I'm sure there are others.
In closing I gotta ask: Have these *ssholes ever heard of the Spartans?
They set the benchmark for warrior performance two and a half thousand years ago.
No one dared give them any crap about who was groping who after hours.

[AusGail]

21. Maybe gays are too good for the military

I'm sure the majority of them dont really want to learn how to kill. Why not get involved with an organisation like Human Rights, Doctors without Borders, Red Cross or some other charitable organisation that doesn't discriminate? The world needs someone to clean up after the mess Bush and his buddies have made.

[MGD]

22. If it doesn't kill you, it will make you stronger.

While I served in the US Army, I saw plenty of gays and plenty of open discrimination perpetrated against them by fanatically homophobic soldiers at all levels. For instance, during my enlistment years, a gay soldier was beaten to death with a baseball bat by such homophobes (not at my duty station). I always felt that I was far too intelligent to be in the Army and that feeling hasn't diminished since I got out. I have also always felt that the most rabidly anti-gay types are the ones repressing the most homosexuality. Their homophobic manifestations are nothing but the psychic projection of their own inner ambivalence regarding their own homosexual desires. Ultimately, the socially accepted practice of discriminating against homosexuals is simple and primitive taboo law in its purest form. It exists for the same reasons that all simple and primitive taboo laws exist: the fear of taboo transmissibility (that which has touched the taboo idol is now, itself taboo); the fear of demons, magic, and divine punishment; and, above all else, a repressed inner ambivalence regarding the taboo subject; that is to say, the desire to touch the taboo idol conflicts with the fear of what might happen if the taboo idol is touched.

spelling

[BlueIris]

23. For the record, the War on Gay isn't less important than other problems.

Getting rid of anti-gay bigotry is just as important as stopping other kinds of prejudice, oppression, hatred and injustice.

[Pushed To The Left]

24. The right wing is proving what hypocrites they truly are

Like you said, they are putting bigotry above national security. The prejudice that the right wing has against gay people is one of the major reasons I became a Democrat! The religious right continues to destroy the country in countless ways, and now they are jeopardizing national security.

The best thing those of us who oppose prejudice can do is to remain politically active and work to defeat the religious right and destroy their divisive political movement!