MARY LYON FROM THE LEFT: The Wedgie Issue

[Tace]

by Mary Lyon -- World News Trust

There they go again. We've kicked off another week with the holier-than-thou's in Washington gnashing their teeth and rending their garments about gay marriage. Why barf up this particular hairball again? Because the republi-CONS need it. Their president is a millstone around their necks that they can't take off, even as they find themselves sinking into deeper, darker waters. Their grip on power is in serious jeopardy and things are getting desperate.

Their one-party monopoly teeters on an increasingly bloody and unpopular war, an economy that seems only to be booming for the super-rich, soaring gasoline prices, immigration proposals that please no one and do little to get to the bottom of the immigration problem, plus our official all-American torture policy, the rampant illegal government wiretapping of us civilians, plus the fact that the Party of Pirates reeks of corruption, and it's becoming just a little too much for many Americans to stomach anymore. So what's a poor GOP to do then? When all else fails (as it certainly is doing), get the wedge! Yeah! As Jon Lovitz would say, that's the ticket! And it isn't just any wedge issue.

These desperate conservative housewives and husbands feel forced to fire up their base and give their Limbaugh/O'Reilly- loving faithful SOME reason, ANY reason, to drag their sorry behinds to the polls in November and vote republi-CON yet again. Even if they have to hold their noses -- and their waistbands -- to do it. Sneak up from behind when you hope the unsuspecting aren't looking (because they're looking too closely at the more and more dismal news of latter-day My Lai's and other assorted slaughter sprees in Iraq and other things you don't want them to see, when they should be paying attention), grab the top of the underwear and yank abruptly skyward. When your back is against the wall, when even old standards like Osama and Saddam fail you, haul out the homosexuals. The audience knows what's behind Door Number One, Monty. That-there's a CLOSET door! With GAYS behind it, who are gonna' break outta' there and come after us and force us to become peace-mongers and vote for Democrats and eat quiche and watch "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" without passing moral judgments and turn us into an AY-moral nation. AY-Yi-Yi.

Heaven forbid, 'eh? Aren't we SO over this already? Oris this the last gasp of desperate GOPers everywhere,who see their unilateral lock on power in Washington on the endangered species list? No wonder they feel so threatened!

more

http://worldnewstrust.org/modules/AMS/article.php?storyid=3677

[SpiralHawk]

1. "There they go again." You said it.

There they go again. What desperate bullshit.